Naruto: Freeloading is Great! [13]

Morning. The first day of the new year.

Because he’d gone to bed early last night, Hoshino didn’t sleep until noon as usual. He opened his eyes, ready to wash up and eat breakfast—when suddenly, beside Naruto’s futon, he noticed a strip of orange cloth.

A triangular piece of orange fabric, wrinkled in places, with faint heat still steaming from it.

“…”

Hoshino pretended not to see anything and headed for the toilet. He hoped that in the time it took him to “use the bathroom,” that perverted Naruto—with his fetish for wearing girls’ pantsu—would properly clean up the aftermath of his indulgence.

Yes. In just one second, Hoshino had already reconstructed the entire “process.”

Naruto messing around under the futon until striped pantsu spilled out—that was something Hoshino had witnessed the night before. But seeing how deeply wounded Naruto had been yesterday, he hadn’t said a word. Instead, he’d chosen to turn in early, letting Naruto vent his “heartbreak” however he pleased.

Once Hoshino stepped into the bathroom…

Naruto quietly poked his head out from under the futon, eyes drifting toward that pair of pantsu lying outside—the pair he had specially warmed with his own hands for Hoshino.

Why!? I put it so obviously this time and he still didn’t notice! Hoshino, are you blind!?

Naruto had promised Hoshino he’d give him another chance to “get” his pantsu. But more than a week had passed since last time, and out of shyness, he still hadn’t kept that promise.

Yesterday, though, after witnessing Hoshino’s confession get rejected with such disgust, Naruto finally made up his mind. He would not only indulge Hoshino’s perverted male tastes—he would even warm them up for him. It was winter, after all. Without heating, using them would be too cold.

That was Naruto’s idea of kindness toward Hoshino.

Unfortunately, last night’s failure—placing them too inconspicuously so Hoshino never noticed—was now followed by another failure. Even this morning, after leaving them in plain sight, Hoshino still ignored them.

Before Hoshino returned from the bathroom, Naruto picked up the “cooling down” pantsu and fell into thought.

The spot was perfect. There was no way Hoshino could’ve missed them. Then why didn’t he take them?

Because he himself was present?

No, no, no. The book said that having the owner present made it more exciting. For a pervert like Hoshino, that should only make things worse, not better.

If the problem wasn’t that he didn’t notice, and not that he wasn’t interested, then…

Naruto suddenly realized something important. He lowered his gaze to his own pajama bottoms.

Yes. That had to be it.

Last time, the pantsu hadn’t been washed. This time, they were washed clean. Thinking back, Hoshino hadn’t just wanted to use them—he’d even wanted to eat them. So clearly, the pantsu had to be secondhand.

“Uu… Hoshino… you’re way, way, waaay too picky…”

Back and forth, half an hour wasted. At last, Naruto fought back tears. For his friend, for his family, and above all—for their bond! He chose to pull down his pajama bottoms, preparing to “dirty” the freshly laundered pantsu.

Click—

The sound of the bathroom door opening.

…

Sigh. Truly worthy of the “Child of Prophecy” and Nine-Tails’ Jinchūriki. He’d been rustling under the blankets for half the night, and here he was again in the morning.

Hoshino had long since finished washing up. He’d been staring blankly into the mirror for nearly half an hour, his thin sleepwear leaving him shivering in the winter cold.

In that half hour, surely Naruto—who was already awake—must have noticed the underwear lying outside the futon and hidden it away.

Thinking this, Hoshino opened the bathroom door to head back and change. After all, in midwinter, staying in just pajamas was freezing… freezing…

“…” ×2

Both Hoshino and Naruto froze.

At that moment, Naruto was standing on the futon, one leg lifted, pulling on a pair of orange-striped pantsu. Fortunately his pajama top was long enough—otherwise you’d see two half-circles. Even so, the scene was unbearably awkward.

“You… you go on.”

“Ee—ee—eek—!!”

Bang!

Amid Naruto’s shriek—the shriek of a crossdressing pervert—Hoshino darted back into the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

The first thing he did after hiding inside was… wash his eyes!

Dear god. He had given that brat so much time to clean up, only to be rewarded with the sight of a crossdressing pervert putting on striped panties!

Though his eyes had been burned, one fact was undeniable: that brat’s legs weren’t bad. Slim, fair, with a skin quality that looked almost soft to the touch—ugh… uuugh… blegh!

Thankful he hadn’t eaten breakfast yet, Hoshino collapsed over the sink, dry-heaving furiously. He wasn’t just nauseated by the “perverted” scene he had witnessed—he was disgusted at himself, at the fleeting appreciation he’d felt for Naruto’s skinny legs.

After splashing his face with freezing tap water for several minutes, regaining his calm, Hoshino’s hand gripped the door handle. Should he open it?

Maybe he should wait another half hour.

If he came out too soon, and saw Gaylord Naruto putting on—or worse, taking off—women’s underwear again… the awkwardness would send him straight to heaven!

Better to wait. That way the next meeting would at least be a little less mortifying.

Just then, from the main room came the sound of a door opening and closing. Likely Naruto, unable to endure the shame, had quickly dressed and bolted outside.

Relieved, Hoshino opened the bathroom door once more—

“G-good morning…”

He found Sasuke sitting at the little round table, face full of awkwardness as she greeted him. As for Naruto—he was curled up under the futon, cheeks blazing, too ashamed to meet Hoshino’s eyes.

“…I—I must’ve opened the door the wrong way.”

Clack—

Hoshino went back into the bathroom. Then opened the door again…

“Why isn’t this an illusion—!!”

…

In that shabby little twenty-square-meter room, three kids sat around the table in silence, heads lowered.

During that time, Hoshino and Naruto had each taken turns carrying winter clothes into the bathroom to change out of their pajamas. It was their habit. After all, one was afraid his male body might stir a certain blonde homo’s “interest,” while the other was afraid her female body might drive a certain silver-haired pervert completely insane.

Even with those “changing clothes” excuses, leaving the other two behind in hopes the deadlock would break, when they came back the air was still just as…

Hoshino: So awkward—! Sasuke, who cruelly dumped Naruto yesterday, doesn’t dare speak. Naruto’s hurting from heartbreak and… from earlier. Damn it, as the host here, it’s gotta be me who starts… right?!

Sasuke: So awkward—! Yesterday I forced myself to say such cruel things. Do Hoshino and Naruto hate me so much they’d rather hide in the bathroom, one after another, than look at me? But… but I came here to give New Year’s greetings. I must say something to fix this…!!

Naruto: So awkward—! Sasuke was so disgusted with Hoshino yesterday, and now Hoshino is shaken after what he saw of my body. What do I do? How do I ease things between them…!?

“Um…” ×3

“You—You go first.” ×3

“…Then I’ll go first!” ×3

“…” ×3

Their voices overlapping again and again, the three sank back into silence. The atmosphere now… even more awkward than before.

Aaaahhh—!! What the hell are we supposed to do!? ×3

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This is a fan translation of 火影之软饭真好吃 by 肾亏能力者 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!