Paddington Pigeon

I don't know if Rarity had nightmares that night after dealing with Stone Mane's and Applebloom's failed attempts to purchase questionable age-related merchandise. Link But I do know that Applejack was getting confirmation of her next Dream Realm get together in my Equestria dreamscape.

Applejack carefully scooped up a spoonful of bubbling corn chowder from the cook pot and then gently blew on the content before giving it a taste. A smile slowly spread across her face. Perfect.

The mare couldn't remember if she had cooked in previous dreams, but since meeting King Trafalgar Maximilian Augustus Leopold the III and with help from her little sister the mare had found she could remember her dreams more and that she'd could manipulate them to some degree. AJ found this lucidity in her sleep to be an amazing thing.

Now after their last get together which AJ found later was much more expensive than she'd originally imagined she had promised to cook dinner for the king as her way of making up for the load of bits his Majesty had spent that evening. Link So the mare was working up a menu for their next get together. One nice thing about cooking in the your dreams was you never ran out of ingredients, and you didn't have to wash the pots, pans, and utensils when you were done.

The palomino mare had just placed a pie to cool on the sill of one of the kitchen's windows. She was starting to head back to the stove when she suddenly heard the flapping of wings. Turning around she found herself looking at a large, rather plump grey pigeon that was now perched on the windowsill by the pie.

A large, rather plump grey pigeon with a black bowler hat, scarlet bow tie, white shirt with stiff upright collar, a black satin vest, a monocle, and a brass tube attached to one of its legs. Its head and neck bobbed back and forth as it took in the locale.

AJ was pretty sure she knew why the pigeon was there. Avian couriers seemed to be a preferred method for the king to convey messages across the Dream Realm. Without blinking an eye the mare spoke first.

"Can I help ya?"

The pigeon coughed in a cooing fashion and then addressed the mare. "I say! Allow me to introduce myself!" The bird quickly lowered its head. "I am Paddington Pigeon, and I'm wishing to contact the fair maiden known as Applejack. Pray tell, would you by chance be that maiden?"

AJ pushed her Stetson back on her head. "Um. Yeah that'd be me. Imma guessin' ya have a message from his Majesty?"

"Splendid!" Exclaimed the bird in a very proper, refined male voice. It flapped its wings a few times. "Most excellent! Why yes I come to you on this most pleasant of days with a message from the king. Now...."

Suddenly the pigeon started to squat down. AJ had seen this gesture by the chickens around the yard. She scowled at the bird.

"Ya ain't plannin' ta take a poop on my windowsill r' ya?"

The pigeon looked up and blinked several times as its head continued to bob back and forth. "What? Oh no no no! Please! Perish the thought! I was...just retrieving the message from my leg tube!"

The bird stood a bit more upright. Then it lowered its head and reached around as it lifted its right leg. With its bill it carefully pulled a rolled up piece of paper from the tube. It then took a moment to unroll it. As he did the paper seemed to grow until it was the size of a standard sheet of stationary. Standing on the now unrolled sheet of paper, Paddington used his right wing to adjust his monocle. After a moment he started reading aloud.

Greetings and salutations my fair Applejack. I, King Trafalgar Maximilian Augustus Leopold the III am writing to inform you that I am most eager to accept your invitation to partake of your most excellent of cooking! I look forward to dining at your domicile tomorrow evening. Please give your confirmation to this messenger so he may relay it back to me. Your ever obedient servant.

King Trafalgar Maximilian Augustus Leopold the III. Benevolent Ruler of Upper Lower Tortoisestan.

The pigeon then carefully rolled the paper back up which now shrunk in size and he returned it to his message tube. Tilting his head side-to-side he addressed Applejack. "So madam. What message should I relay back to his Majesty?"

AJ rolled her eyes at all the pomp and circumstance but still she smiled. "Tell his Majesty I'm hankering ta feed him grub he's not gonna ferget fer a month of Sundays."

The pigeon perked up. "Smashing! Bravo! Well if you will excuse me I will be on my way. May you always have wonderful dream. Goodbye."

Then pigeon took off. It was only after he'd left that AJ noticed.

There was poop on the windowsill.

AJ grumbled and went looking for a cloth to clean it up.

To be continued.