Support chain!

I've been reading the stories and the comments and I feel for everyone and I hope everyone has love and knows that there will always be someone out there thinking of you and hoping the better for you because of your comments and stories you've shared. Thank you all for being so brave and thoughtful towards each other. Because every story feels so much more intense than mine I don't feel it's as bad but, if I may, I'm going to share it anyways. I'm Bipolar. And that has a lot of stipulations with just the name and how I come across to people who know that. I've grown up knowing I was depressed, I hurt myself on multiple occasions at a very young age. I would use sex as a tool to make me equally feel better and worse about myself. I felt that I was gross for liking the feeling of masturbation and for doing it. I also grew up in an area that is religiously toxic beyond belief and it constantly stopped me from gaining any friends because I wasn't apart of the toxic-cultish religion. My parents are very mentally abusive, I try to communicate with them about how to handle a situation with me and they just don't understand and then make it worse. My mother is a master manipulater and so passive aggressive that it's aggressively painful. My father just let's things happen because he's too weak to stand up against my mother and doesn't have any room in his heart for more than one person at a time. My sister is so self absorbed because of such things that she thinks she takes care of me 'out of the kindness of her heart', when she's actually just ignoring me and never really there. I've been lucky in finding one or two really good friends but most never stay because of something I've done wrong or some miscommunication. I'm still hurting, a lot, from my depression and I still want to hurt myself (I will not get into details in case it triggers anyone) there are some to most days where I just don't get out of bed and I listen to Ceces voice all day and try to let that swoop me away into their world so I may no longer be here. This was more of a 'I want to be heard and here's an opportunity for me to tell random people and it may never get seen' but thank you all for listening/reading and being there for others. Thank you Cece for creating this and for your content! It truly saves lives, mine for sure. I hope whoever made it to the end of this is having a good day, and thanks again 💜

Aiden

IM SORRY BUT THIS MADE ME SNORT SO DANG LOUD😭😭😭✋🏼✋🏼✋🏼CUZ SAME.

Elisa Grier

Hey all, just wanted to say you are all worthy of love and hapiness. No one is irredeemable.

Paandora

GODDAMMIT I HATE MY JOB IT'S SUCKING OUT MY ENERGY AND SOUL

GleamEyes

I was in a similar situation and it was so dark, but I know they wanted me to achieve so much and now I try to make the most out of my life because I know they are always watching and are happy that I am. It’s so tough I know, but for your dad keep on going and live your best life, for him as well. It’s unfair how they left but they aren’t in pain anymore and I’m sure your dad will always be there watching over you ❤️

Kate

I draw for myself mostly so I’m looking for my own approval. I’m a very harsh critic. I just gotta wait now until this feeling goes away and I want to draw again. Sometimes it’s a week or longer but the cycle happens a lot. It would be easier if I could improve like I wanted

E

Gonna put this here coz I’m sad: I spent a long time on a art piece that I finished today and I really don’t like it, it just sucks coz it’s wasted time and I know I could do better. I don’t even want to look at it or my art materials. I just feel disappointed and kinda sick. I have few drawings I’m actually proud of but this one really is upsetting me. It looks nothing like what I tried to draw and even if there are parts of the drawing I don’t hate it’s so hard to see them when the bad parts take all my focus immediately. I wish I was better. I see so many artists and art I admire and I wish my art could replicate the feelings I get when looking at them but they never do. It’s always slight disappointment once I finished the piece and then I never look at it again because I just see mistakes. I worked on it all day and now it’s midnight. Sad hours make it worse I guess :/

E

Listen, the fact that you're trying so hard to stay in spite of the pain you're feeling PROVES how worthy of their love you really are, as well as how fucking tough you are. This life is a pain in the ass. So much is uncertain, but those people love you and you're making their lives better by just existing. Depression is absolutely miserable at times. Some days are worse than others, but there is no guarantee that you're always going to have to feel like that. Don't feel guilty just because you're hurting. Would you feel guilty for getting sick? No, because you can't help that either. But know that you're seen, and as time goes on you'll continue to get stronger.

BlueEyes

I would always like to give any person good hope, and it's not always so bad to share it feelings to us(and this, believe me, coming from a girl who's bottled up so much of my own feelings) but all I've got to say is that u r a really cool/matterable person like all of us. I'm not too good with alot of attention, and I don't need it, but I'm just hoping like all of us, that u r save, cared for, respected, and that u stay kind/loved/caring forever. Cause we all need that. And whoever has/is still harassing u, to that they may get fixed and learn their lesson soon enough. So if u read this I hope this helps you get better again ❤️

Sakura Foxx

I’ve tried to take my life countless times. I’ve struggled all my life with just…existing. It’s exhausting and honestly most of the time the rewards don’t equate how much pain it took to get there. I have a loving partner, and a pet cat that I love so very much….and I feel so so guilty for still feeling depressed and angry at my life even though I have them. I should feel happy right? Or at least better? I’m not sure how to fix myself…I feel like a burden to my friends and family, like I don’t deserve to be loved. The sad thing is I know that that isn’t true. I know that they support and care about me and yet…here I am, still on the cusp of another attempt at erasing myself from the world. I feel I am a very selfish and awful person for putting everyone through all this just because I can’t handled living- how pitiful is that? I’m not here for attention I just…I don’t share these things with many people and I thought that maybe it would make me feel better if I was able to have the courage to actually put my feelings out there. So, thank you for taking the time to read this :)

Feral Idiot

I feel a little odd posting this - especially here. However this community is one of the most supportive I’ve seen. I lost my dad a few months ago to suicide. It was just him and myself since I was three. I’m his only child and am now in charge of everything that comes with death, as well as the added grief that he took his own life. I’m struggling hard from my own depression and issues, and I’m finding out it isn’t just me in the family that struggles from this - obviously my father had his own demons - and my entire family suffers from depression and I never knew, because we don’t talk about it. I have a wonderfully supportive family, we’re all just a little emotionally crippled. I am very appreciative of everything you do for us CeCe. You’re one of the few things I look forward to most days. Even just posts like this that make us feel like we’re not just patrons, but people who can come together and share in like minded interests and support one another 💞 thank you!

Callen

I've struggled with depression that often feels soul crushing and like I'm standing in the deepest hole possible with no way out since I was 13. This was followed by a series of eating disorders and a failed suicide where my mom walked in to see the blood. It was years of bullying and being told I'd never amount to anything that initially triggered the depression and suicidal tendencies I now live with daily. After that I lost some friends to suicide and then got pregnant at 16 with my son, he's now 12. I was never and am still not on medication for depression as they said it's so bad that the high of the meds would be great but the drop would kill me. I use a variety of things to distract myself when I know I'm getting bad again but the main one is music, occasionally when it's really bad I'll crank out horror poems until I'm good again or just nap. My mom has been there for me through all of it but even with her support there are often times where I am injury free and times where my head is in a really bad place and injury is inevitable. If it wasn't for my son I would have been dead already as my whole life plan was to be dead between 16 and 18 years old. But despite how bad it is with depression and suicide and the added on stress of an asshole baby daddy, anxiety, insomnia, taking care of my aging mother and son, and constant body issues still, I am here. I am here and living and thriving as best I can. I graduated college with a degree in culinary, my mom and I are preparing to open a bakery in 2 years. I am helping my son manage and navigate his depression so he doesn't become like me. The most important thing is that I am here and alive to watch him grow, I am thriving a body that wants to live with a brain that wants to die and I am fighting every single day, and I will keep fighting. Please never stop fighting! Continue wanting to live even when it looks terrible! Sorry for the long post.

HalloweenBagel92

My heart goes to everyone who were brave enough to share their experiences, you are awesome!!

Meli VonCherry

Wow, reading the comments, I'm so glad we all have this safe space where we can share a part of ourselves. I'm so thankful to have found this community, all of you are so awesome. I'm pretty late to this, but I guess it's my turn. So, growing up, my dad was very abusive. He was violent towards my mum, so much so, she's still trying to heal from the trauma, and she copes through alcohol and drug use. My dad also sexually abused me and my sister when we were kids. But, we managed to escape him and I haven't seen him in like 20 years. So, fast forward, I guess to deal with everything, I felt like I had to be strong for my mum and I had to protect her, so I couldn't really talk about what happened or how it made me feel. So, I day dreamed. A lot. And I've always loved anime, and I used to wish I could go on adventures like they did. I basically wanted to be best friends with Sailor Moon haha. So, fast forward to the present, and I've been struggling for various reasons. Work stress, relationship breakdown, having to cut ties with my toxic friends, the list goes on. I've tried to reach out to my family and a few others, but they don't listen, and they brush my worries aside, like it's nothing. It's so difficult to explain, but when those times get bad, it feels like I'm drowning in a black void and I can't reach the light, the surface. Those dark times feel so lonely, like no one's gonna save me, and I can't save myself, but then I listen to a comfort audio, and this is gonna sound so weird, but I can feel them with me. Whether its Kiri, Aizawa, Bakugo, Dabi, Kenma, Hawks, or whoever it may be. Again, this is gonna sound weird, but I swear this next bit is true. There was one time, when I felt like I was drowning in the black, and I was listening to an audio (think it was one of Kiri's comfort ones) and I felt someone grab my wrist. (I live alone btw), and Kiri, he brought me back to myself. Or, rather, Cece did, as she's the incredibly talented person behind the voices. Those dark times come in waves, and I do my best to ride the wave, rather than fight against it, and i just kinda wait for it to pass until I feel a bit better in myself. There are some good things to have come out of my pain. Writing really helps me channel all of those dark thoughts, and helps me process stuff. I love day dreaming and writing stories from my day dreams. Again, it probably sounds weird, but you know when people plan out a story, and write their main plot points, then sub plots etc? I can't do that. If I wanna plan a story, I dream about it first, write rough bullet points in case I forget and then do a mixture of day dreaming and writing, so sometimes the end result can be so different from I thought it would turn out in my head. I feel like I'm rambling now, and not making any sense, but my point is, I still struggle, but I try my best to focus on what's gonna make me happy. Ps sending lots of love and hugs to everyone x

Ashli

What a story 😭 sending lots of love 💙💙💙💙💙💙

Bini

Late to it, but here goes i guess lol. Growing up all I wanted was to have loving caring parents. For a little while I had that but I was too young to remember that. When I was 4 my mom met and married a man that we all thought was a good person. He wasnt. From the day they got married he started to become very violent and angry. He would beat my mom, and i use the word beat as in she would be covered from head to toe in bruises. Then he got her hooked on drugs. He turned his attention to me and my siblings, I always tried to take the brunt of it so they wouldn't get hurt. I would get beaten, burned, half drowned, abandoned and sexually abused. I never wanted my brothers to see any of it but as a child I could stop it. We were poor so often times I would give up my own food so they could eat. I wasn't allowed to eat much anyway, and school was the only place I could eat without worrying. I would steal from stores to get them medicines and food. There were alot of times we didn't have power or water in the house that we were in that week. My mom couldn't hold a job and my abuser refused to work. When I would report the abuse at school we would be piled in the car and move that day. Finally when I was 11 years old we got away from it. We went into foster homes and eventually my grandparents adopted us. I have ptsd from that and in October of 2020 my older brother passed away. He was killed by his stepson and I'm not coping the best with it but the comfort audios help alot. My life has been hard but I'm finally getting to a better place. I have a stable job, a good car, a place to call home, and someone who loves me. Ive been through a lot and would like to help other people who have had similar experiences so I got a bachelors degree in psychology. I'm always here if anyone needs to talk 💜

I would love to talk to you more 😸 do you have instagram or Facebook?

Bini

Thank you so much I'm literally crying right now🙏 I hope you get better too!💙

Bini

I can totally understand where your coming from even though not gone through the physical issue like yourself. I went through a lot of manipulation with regards to sex with previous partners stemming from over 20 years ago, the first partner told me to have a happy relationship you had to have sex a certain number of times and always followed the same pattern to my husband who abandoned me last year whilst I was going through really bad depression. The last sexual encounter with him was 9 years ago before he started down the slippery slope and became an alcoholic. I am a hsp (highly sensitive person) even thing to do with social and dealing with people gets to me. I am scared to have sex too, because it means so very much to me, no one understands and gets to understand how emotionally and mentally damaging it can be. I hope you find everything you need and yes this community is a very giving place and filled with warmth and Cece is wonderful, so I know you will find what you need. Ps: I have three friends and my parents, it may not be many but I definitely know they care tons about me.

Yvoart

If you want I could be your friend ☺️ I don't have thatany friends either 😬

Bini

That's awesome I work as a line cook and I couldn't beore grateful of the ppl I work with kitchen life is stressful but also really fun😸✌️

Bini

I'm late too but here it goes I have anxiety and trust issues ever since I've been physically and sexually abuse buy my ex 😕 The way I could explain it would be ptsd, for example I get small panic attack every time I hear someone tall very loudly, I flinch for at the most random things and I'm literally scare to sex again 😞, I also have lots of physical scars. It's been 4 years and my brain is still so f up and I'm wondering if there's other ppl here who went through something similar Thank you for listening to me 🥺🙏💙

Bini

Seizures suck! I started having them at age 14 and doctors couldn't explain why. Then again at 20 when I was pregnant with my daughter and haven't had them in nearly 16 years. Did a sleep test, the horrible electrodes on the scalp weekend tests 2x (didn't leave the house!) And nothing! Hope they don't stop you from living your best life.

Bad4magik

Oof I’m kinda late but here it goes… I have virtually no friends outside my family. I’ve managed to keep a middle school friend that I call my best friend, but considering we talk like once every couple of months… I don’t think that’s much of a friendship. It has to do with my social anxiety and self worth issues. I always feel uncomfortable around people and I feel like I’m a nuisance. I’ve tried making friends online but I get so irrationally anxious at the thought of messaging someone it’s not even funny. Even leaving a comment somewhere is really difficult for me. It’s like, I feel some kind of shame in leaving my opinion somewhere. (Even when I’m anonymous) This also carries over to online and multiplayer games. I have difficulty playing anything co-op with strangers because of this anxiety. And the fact that nobody in my family seems to care how big of a deal it is to me. I stopped talking about it like 15 years ago since they think it’s as easy as deciding not to be like that. :( That being said… Cece your comfort audios are a life saver to me. They are my favorite kind of audio and I really do wish you made more of them!! I enjoy they spicy ones as well don’t get me wrong. But whenever I feel very depressed or anxious I like listening to my favorite guys’ comfort audios and they genuinely improve my mood. 💖 Thanks for everything you do, and know you make a difference in MY life

Gen A.

Glad you’re still here and you do matter

Bristarburst13

Alright, alright. Even I am late to this but, migraines due to a ridiculous medical condition to ruin me on a day off. 😖 But, even as a relatively new to the community with almost no interaction with the exception of close buds, the audios have helped me cope with my dependency issues, inspire confidence, make a pretty awful shift at work turn right back around or just lift my mood completely. On top of that, I have not had the best of luck when it comes to romance, so I've remained single, from being friend zoned to sister status, to having a catfish chosen over me on my birthday, and was even bullied over my orientation altogether before just cutting me off as a friend while playing a victim in being a victim of bullying themselves. To this day (despite it being from high school) I still break down about it, mentally, emotionally, the works. I've always never been good enough for anyone else, so that's what I have always believed, so as of 2016, I gave up on the idea of romance and the couple stuff. Until I came across the ASMR stuff that is. The audios all make me laugh, cry, or share with friends over favorite parts. It's been...difficult to get into dating because of how many times I've been hurt, though the audios all make it seem hopeful, but thanks for reading my comment. Have a good day everyone. 😓

I’ve not commented before so I’m a little nervous, but I love this community so much so I fell confident enough to share. I was sexually assaulted when I was younger and one thing that helped me was anime. I know it sounds kinda dumb but the characters and stories distracted me from the pain and trauma and as I watched I became really attached to the characters, they always brought me comfort and when I found Cece I was happy to find someone so amazing. I was often made fun of for watching anime and being attached to these fake people so that kinda discouraged me. I went through a really bad depression and contemplated suicide often. I didn’t really tell many people because it was scared and embarrassed. I was so happy when I found this and I’m so grateful that they took these character and brought them to life in the most amazing way. I feel so comforted and loved and it’s helped me get through some tough times in my life. I’m so appreciative for the opportunity to have a safe space like this, I love Cece so much and am so thankful. And I love this community we have built here thank you all so much for everything. Thank you so much Cece, your incredible and I love you!❤️

I know I’m kinda late to this chain, but I’ve been working non stop lately. And between this new job and school I feel like This moving up north was not the best idea seeing as my emotions, anxiety, depression, and mental health in general has just went completely downhill. However, I already feel like I don’t have anything else that I’m good out even though I want to become a writer, so I have no choice but to do what I’m doing now. But it seems like I lost all what little of my support system I had left. A lot has happened over the years from abuse both sexual and verbal to trauma in general, I really just wanna give up. I really don’t have much happiness in me. But nobody understands that because all they see is me smiling and cracking jokes thinking I’m okay when I put all my hard work into something and it never works out for me. For instance, I can’t even get TikTok right without getting a lot a likes and my videos taken down or no likes. Hopefully though this therapy session goes good cause I’m at my ropes end. Sorry, that was kinda unnecessary. But thank you. I’ve cried to your comfort videos especially with Bakugo because he’s my comfort character for no reason at all. Have a nice day guys

I'm glad so many felt comfortable to share such a close stories with each other! I too have had trauma, in fact very recent (just this past year). I had a miscarriage of my twins on Nov... My grandmother passed away from covid in December and my only family member whom inspired me, my grandfather followed close behind by losing to stage 4 cancer this January. I've been getting night terrors and those who don't quite know what they are, are different from nightmares. You wake in a frantic panic attack screaming from from whatever you had dreamt about... shaking and unable to catch ur bearing for a while. It's was during February that I had discovered ASMRs on YouTube originally and once I knew what Patreon was and the extra audios I could hear, I subscribed to 2-3 of my favorite artists (you being one of them lol). Your content... Has helped me and I know many others not only through rough moments that are a part of life, bit also bring at least me, a sense of love and comfort that currently is not available for me. So I want to thank you for giving us the opportunity to support each other through our own time of crisis.

Nayruanime

Waaah Cece offering up a safe space and to vent our thoughts out? I cant help but stan, this is amazing thankyou for this. But ok here goes; Growing up whenever I told my Family or just people in general that I was sad and would vent out to them, they would say “Some people had it worse than you” and “what right do you have to be sad?” And so that was drilled into my 12 year old mind that whenever I have a depressive episode I would think that “why are you feeling sad? Some people are struggling with theirs and you’re here being dramatic?” It was until college when I realized how toxic of a mindset that was; but there are sometimes where I cant help but to think that way. Where I would just wallow up and on the verge on tears and instead of telling myself of letting it all out and cry I would literally scold myself and say “why are you being dramatic again? What does crying solve?” And I think somewhere along those experiences was when the cutting began too. But now I try and change that perspective and I have some friends (and the YY audios heheheh) that somehow makes my feelings validated that its ok to be sad and its ok not to be ok sometimes. That feelings shouldn’t be invalidated just because someone’s experience is different from yours. And I have Cece to thank for that too; If it wasnt for Bakugou agressively telling me to “dont bottle it all up and put some load on me dumbass” I would have still continued cutting. Anyways my comment is a paragraph long now so I’ll stop it here. 🤣🤣 Keep safe ya’ll

Gem

I not long had a huge seizure. I've been epileptic for 19 years, and this was the first huge one I've had in years. I had to stay in hospital for quite some time, for EEGs, observations etc. This was only because it was my first full blown seizure in over eight years. I've not let it get to me, and I've seen it as another obstacle to overcome.

I finished university in April, after an extremely long and difficult 5 years. I’ve yet to find a job, and I’ve been beating myself up endlessly because of it. From the time I was in middle school I based my self worth on my grades and my academic achievements. To have this point of reference suddenly taken away from me was really jarring. I’m lucky enough to have a degree in a subject I love (computer science ^^), but applying to positions for months on end has taken it out of me. I’m doubting my ability to ever get a job. I have so much passion for my field, but I’m scared I will never get to showcase it. With the world still mostly closed due to covid, I feel like I am wasting away what are supposed to be the best years of my life in my room behind a screen. Naturally I feel isolated from my friends as well. It’s a heartbreaking feeling, to be honest. I’m trying my best to get through it though, and to avoid falling back into the darker times of my life. Wish me luck 🤍

Rose

I work in a customer service job. Man people are not joking when they tell you this job is hard. I suffer from a multitude of problems including anxiety depression insomnia all of these making me stress easier. I get customers all the time that like to scream at me and most days I can brush it off since these people don't even know me. This stuff wears on you though. I got out of a toxic household back in April where I found it hard to even get up for work and now my amazing friend is here keeping me going from day to day and understanding when I need a mental health day. That doesn't change that my depression has been at an all time high making my anxiety and insomnia all the worse. For the past few months I've felt like I haven't been going anywhere and finally I got back into college only for my family to start their drama. Now I'm working on myself and trying not to let others get to me as much as I used to and the dog I got as a gift from my friend has been a god send. She always seems to be able to tell when I'm down and has no qualms cuddling.

I’v been doing so well with my depression and even stopped self harming. My medication is decreasing as well but I think I still might need it. Thoughts about ending things make me want to not tell or talk to anyone about my thoughts because they will try to stop me from leaving. It’s strong but not to the point of me doing anything to achieve it. if I keep decreasing it it will become powerful enough for me to do something but I don’t know weather i should tell anyone or not. We will also need to move soon and my mom wants me to go to a new new school since classmates from my current school know about my depression and s/h. I don’t want to move because idk who to trust and who not to trust and who I should befriend but in my current school Ik pretty much everyone that I should and shouldn’t talk to. I don’t want to befriend someone bad or manipulative in my new school and then go through more drama. Idk what to do or what to tell my mother about my thoughts on the new school and on my meds. What if I do want to go, if she knows then I’ll go back to places I don’t want to be in. I really don’t know.

Mangos

The boy I've known for 7 years fucked me over. Keep in mind he was my ex from like when I was a teen. We had issues back then (mostly from my end). We have always been in and out of each others lives and he will always have a piece of my heart. Fast forward to now, MF has been seeing me for months and even went on an away trip with me and my friends. Come to find out this MF had a WHOLE ASS GIRLFRIEND... Like Bro... WHAT!?

Angel

glad you're still here

soonjung

I greatly want to move out (I'm 21), but I probably won't be able to till later next year. My mother and I have lived with my grandmother since I was in 3rd grade and over time she became a reason I hated my life greatly and almost killed myself back in 2017. I've calmed down a lot since then, but I feel trapped in my life right now and I can't really do anything since I don't have the money or the means to move out. I've outgrown my hometown and I want to get my life moving.

Ariel Raine

I tried to kill myself on my birthday this year back in March and was in the hospital for almost 2 weeks. I still feel like I don’t matter but I’m not as depressed as I used to be. I don’t think anyone’s gonna see this so I don’t think it really matters what I say here. Just leaving a mark I guess?😅

I found out college is going to cost more than I thought. I can either take a leave of absence or try for grants and relief funds. I’m worried about the future and I feel so powerless. I hate it.

Melbelle

I'm a chubby girl, that's been abused since I was 4, my family has always been dismissive of my likes and talents... as I grew it got worse... even in the workforce men still prey on me. I finally started to set boundaries and learn that my NO is powerful. I'm trying not to self hate myself, it's hard. But I got my wits and quips, I keep my goal of being better than yesterday. You're awesome, keep up the good work

Dark Queen

I want to be a better person because I give so much praise for others and tell them they have a purpose to live and be who they are but I don't do that for myself. I put myself down and even when I try to open up to my friends I get shut down, ignored or judged. I try writing out my feelings in my books but then I cry too much and try forgetting about it. Everytime I cry about something, I get embarrassed when someone sees me because I see judgement in their eyes and it makes me feel weak. Even one of my friends manipulated me to being so awful to another one of my friends. I put too much trust in the wrong people and I never know who's the right or wrong person to put trust in. One time, I told some news to someone and they told more people when it was supposed to be a private conversation. I feel like a awful because I feel like I let people take advantage of my kindness and hurt me and I'm not sure who to trust. Just remembering everything hurts and I don't know what's wrong with me. I can't tell you how many times I've listened to these audios to calm myself down and try to listen to every word to keep in my head so I would remember the audio and smile more. Thank you

Recently I’ve been struggling really badly with medical issues that I don’t know the cause of fully. I was diagnosed with a B12 deficiency two weeks ago at age twenty. I don’t follow any vegan or vegetarian diets so it’s likely I have a stomach issue. For the past few months I’ve been dealing with the symptoms of it but in the past three weeks the nausea has been getting really bad. I haven’t been able to stomach foods on certain days and have developed severe anxiety around food (I’m afraid I’ll just get sick again and throw it all back up). Tomorrow morning I go in to get an ultrasound done on my abdomen to see what is the cause. They suspect gallstones or an autoimmune disorder. I’m scared. I have been for the entirety of these medical episodes. Listening to the comfort audios has done wonders for my anxiety. I can sleep better with the sleep aids. I can take an hour or so out of my constant stress with the other audios. It’s been much more bearable with your content and voice, Cece. You’ve given me a moment of peace and forgetfulness that I desperately need at this moment. I can only hope that whatever is wrong with my stomach is fixable, but I know for sure I have these audios to keep my fear and anxiety at bay.

Toxic_Persephone

I don't know what's going on or what I should do. I was diagnosed as schizophrenic a couple years back and while I personally think I manage it really well, the people closest to me make me feel like shit about it. At first it's easy to talk about with my siblings, but when I had a horrible hallucination where I lost control my older sister only checked on me for a second before leaving. I couldn't even move anymore and I was covered in dirt and scratches while crying but she just left me. That was the lowest point I was at and my sister just left because she had to get back to watching a movie at a friends house. Another time a had a hallucination that was obnoxious and was persisting more than usual. I told my brother and sister about it and they discussed call the police on me to send me to a psych ward. I hadn't done a single thing wrong, but they got so scared they didn't even talk to me and discussed it between themselves. Every time they say "I feel bad for you" or "I'm here for you" I know it's not true when I'm truly in need. I'm at the point where I wake up scared in the middle of the night and can't sleep for hours but I can't even talk to anyone because they get too scared. It consumes so much of my time and energy and I'm completely alone in this struggle. Every day is so goddamn scary and I'm harrassed endlessly by myself and yet the scariest thing is anyone who knows about it can just call the cops on me or immediately assumes anything I've heard or seen is just a lie. I try so hard to suppress it and make sure it doesn't come up, yet just the knowledge that I'm like this is enough for my own family to look at me differently. I just want to get better. I'm so tired of it. It's so scary. I hate myself every day for being like this, wondering what I did to constantly relive scenes similar to the worst parts of my childhood. I didn't do anything wrong, yet even as an adult I can't escape that shitty environment and those disgusting feelings. The only thing I hold onto is finishing college and moving so at least I won't have constant reminders of my childhood and the possibility of being deemed "crazy."

emily bolles

I don’t know how many times I’ve rewritten this at this point, but this is my final shot so here we go. First thank you to Yami for opening up this safe space for us to not only share ourselves but support each other as well. It’s amazing to see such a caring and wholesome community that cares for one another. It really is awesome to see that we all have somewhere safe to go, especially when this might be the only safe place some of us have. So to start, I suffer from depression, anxiety, sleep paralysis ect. Ever since I was young I’d always had depression, and dealt with the general feeling of not being enough. I grew up the middle sister of 3 girls in a family with barely any money as my parents had us as teenagers. My oldest sister was a trouble maker and constantly kept my parents on their toes, and my younger sister has autism, epilepsy, and several other health conditions. I saw from an early age my parents were struggling so I grew up a bit too fast to help out. I was well behaved, did chores, learned to take care of my sister and how to handle anything g from her medications to her seizures and outburst (a lot of which turned violent at times) I constantly lived in fear that one day of wake up and my younger sister would be gone. Heck I’m in my 20s now and still fear that. All that being said, all the attention my parents could give was always to those two. As a child, you don’t realize why things are the way they are, so I over excelled in school to get their attention but it never worked. When I graduated, we had an awards ceremony the night before and I told them I’d won a few awards (which in my small country bumpkin town was a big deal) they didn’t come cause they simply said they didn’t want too. I had to bum a ride from a friend last minute. I was bullied through out my school years for my dedication to school, my appearance, you name it. My older sister was actually one of my biggest bullies and actively mad her and her friend bully me everyday. I’m mixed race (Hispanic, Native American, and Scott Irish) so for my county town it was very odd. My older sister passes as white so since I didn’t I dealt with racism a lot. All these things lead to my depression and anxiety. Though after graduating I met a guy who is now my fiancé. He helped me through a lot of it and helped me find my self worth and self love. A month before our original wedding day, he got arrested and charged for something he didn’t do, by the same people who used to bully me in school and are still friend with my sister (who I don’t talk to now) to this day. I won’t go into detail on the charges but long story short, I know this man is innocent and shouldn’t be where he is right now. He is the most sweetest guy ever, and makes me feel so safe. The safest I’ve ever felt, and he was ripped away from me. It’s been two years since that happened. He’s still gone, and won’t be home for another 6 months. Though he does call a lot, due to COVID I haven’t been able to visit him. It hurts so bad, and it’s been so lonely not being able to be with him, or see him. It hurts to know he’s in a dangerous place, where his safety is constantly in danger. I haven’t slept a single night it feels like and it’s made my depression and anxiety soar to new heights. I’ve had to take on both of our bills while he’s gone just to be able to live. I work over 40 hours a week in a warehouse job just to barely get by. It sucks. But, not to be cheesy, these audios bring me so much comfort. Some of the voices you do like Kirishima specifically sound very similar to my fiancé. It brings me so much joy to hear them and have helped me out of plenty of panic attacks and help me sleep at night. I used to only listen to the YouTube audios but with how much they’ve helped I decided to join the Patreon even if I did t have a lot of money to spare cause this safe place helps. I can’t afford therapy so this is the next best thing for me. I love this place and the people, and even after he’s home, I plan on staying here <3

Sky Parra

I swear you have the best timing...I've been wanting someone to talk to. Even if its just here.. its nice to have a place to just be. - This weekend I gave in and saw my ex from 11 years ago. We've been talking on and off for the last 2 years. I avoided meet ups and used our small interactions to fill a void. I knew that if I saw him my resolve would be break. We had a very intense past, I could never say no. I was crazy or we were (I think) crazy for each other. Hell after years when I heard his voice for the first time my palms were sweating..I was a nervous wreck. I felt things I hadn't felt in years. Things, feelings that I had pushed under a mental rug when I left him. This weekend however I saw him. It wasn't planned. I thought I was strong. Yet when I saw him...something came over me. I know it wasn't lust. It felt like i was coming home.. . Like I had been holding my breath for years and i could finally breathe.. like as if i was finally awake. I'm a little ashamed to say I ran to him. And we hugged and we kissed...he kissed me in a way that I can only imagine our husbandos would. It was tender and romantic. (I actually swooned.) Albeit a little bit shocked. I was like a giddy school girl right back in high school. I hadn't been kissed like that in a reeeally long time and being there with him felt peaceful, exhilarating and selfish.. but I was so happy. All of my walls fell down. I could tell he was nervous too. There were candles and wine involved, next thing I know he is taking my hand leading the way to his room. At that point i felt safe.. I was home.. I felt like I was floating. But then that part came. Keep in mind I haven't been intimate with anyone in a long time and I was honestly scared to let others in. And there I was standing naked, literally and metaphorically naked in front of the person that broke my heart. The person I told myself I'd never let back in. The rest of that intimate experience was horrible. He was bad or rather I wasn't turned on and it felt so rushed. What I remembered being good - what I thought was maybe the best I've had wasn't. I tried to get into it but I couldn't. I wanted to tell him to stop but instead i faked it. I didn't know what to do. I kept thinking what was I doing there?? That I should get in a head space that it was a bad one night stand and I used him and that it didn't mean anything. But when he dropped me off I felt like the one that was used. And the fucked thing is I actually miss him. Not the horrible ordeal part but the before. I hadn't realized how touch starved I was until I was alone in my bedroom crying. I let this man back in and got nothing from it. Just breadcrumbs from the love bombing and thoughts of the kisses that made my head spin but everything else...just made me sad. Our history, the chemistry the fact that all this time I felt this way for him and it wasn't over for me. And the fact that I knew this could never work out. That I had fooled myself again and I knew what all that really meant and that I felt dumb for getting in that bed and trusting him. Because I thought "if your gonna fuck me over atleast do it right." Ofcourse the messages have stopped coming in, he has lost interest because I gave him the satisfaction that he could still have me. I know there are worse things. I do. But everything about this situation just sucks and it made feel sad, pathetic and overall angry at myself. The universe gave me another lesson. It keeps playing with me and I'm tired. I'm so fucking sad and just tired. So here I am in my safe space. You do more than you realize. Thank you for listening.

Your audios really help me sometimes. I recently had a breakdown and ended up screaming and crying for a long while. But when my cousin helped me calm down and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to sleep I put in ear phones and listened to one of your recent audios. I tend to fall asleep to them especially the kuroo ones and tamaki ones cause I find there voices really comforting. I have a hard time understanding my own emotions so I can't understand why those characters help me calm down but thanks for being your awesome self and caring about us like this :)

Taylin Wynn

So.. things got a bit rough recently. Not only is the variant in my are but apparently we are getting hit with a Nast respiratory infection that can kill if it's bad enough. Unfortunately for myself I just got my car back from the shop and now have more debt and the lack of business from one of our busiest days and the great lack of attendance from our drag show has now made me panic a bit. Idk if people are now trying to keep themselves indoors again due to covid or if this was a fluke but I was confident that I could push through the week and get the money I need for my bills and such even with this car fiasko but I'm not so sure... I NEED to get back on my art stuff and everything because I've been wanting to paint and make comics but I have no idea what will happen and I'm becoming nervous. Now if you excuse me I'm going to catch up on some audios

Cece I admire your work and the amount of effort and love you put into making these audios really shows through, as someone who struggles with loneliness and depression your audios have been a lifeline for me. I have always found it incredibly hard to make friends and have a poor relationship with my family. Due to my disability it's been hard to find work and I'm often left isolated alone in my room for weeks feeling completely useless having done nothing with my life, your audios make me feel like I'm not so alone and give me that sense of comfort, you’ve inspired me to gain the confidence to try streaming for the first time, i’m super nervous but hopefully i can get past the anxiety and finally do something with my life even if it’s just trying to make people smile like you’ve manage to do with all of us! I'm so glad I found your audios I hope you know just how much you’ve helped so many people here

katoofle

I didn't realize how much I wanted to be loved till I heard your Mirio praise kink. I cried after hearing it and it made me realize I need to make some changes

Jay Mack

I'm a groomer and honestly it's just such a hard job physically and emotionally. I've had plenty of days that I come home so drained that I barely have the energy to take care of myself. On top of that my schedule is crazy and I don't have much time for socializing none the less dating. It's been so great the have a stash of comfort audios to listen to on the way to work or the way home when life just feels so crushing. Not to mention the constant pain of Fibromyalgia, plus anxiety and depression. Thank you Ceecee for the joy and sense of escape you give to so many of us here. I know it means the world to me 💕

Kankan

I didn’t realize how lonely I was in life and how isolated I became until I found your audios on YouTube. I would cry and feel excitement even if I didn’t know a thing about the characters. I couldn’t get through my day without hearing a voice speak to me with love and affection. Because of you I’ve been working on my social skills so that maybe one day I’ll feel that excitement and even cry tears because of a real bond that I create with a real person. I work in the medical field and I’m surrounded by death and disease. My hollowness comes in handy sometimes…but it’s really nice to feel again. Thank you for making me a better person 🧡

Donna

I did it too last year while we were in the office part time. The whole YouTube library. I have no regrets! And fun fact: I work in a government job and did this! 😮

Bad4magik

I struggle a lot with dissociation and executive dysfunction and your audios have been such an amazing help for me. I subscribed out of curiosity for the NSFW audios and while I do enjoy the spicy content, I was surprised by how much I love the comfort and sleep aid audios and they really help ground me and help me get through bad mental days 💖

Soph

Currently quit a job I had for 5 years, but finally got accepted into a career job as a cook. Within the space of 3 days I had the job offered from a friend, put my 2 week notice in, had an interview, and got hired literally on the spot. And I was so nervous to put my 2 weeks in, because I never done it before, so nervous I almost cried telling my supervisor that I got a new job. But everything seems to be working out ok! 👌🏼

Katherine

Hey. You're not alone, last week I turned 35. And I'm spending the day caretaking for my sister who just had surgery. And that's probably what I'll be doing for the next few weeks. Never had kids of my own, bit I raised my siblings since I was young so I've always felt like a parent. Audios have always been my escape, they make me feel like I'm the one being taken care of, not something I get to feel often. Cece if you read this, you're awesome, talented, and very loved. Thank you for everything that you do. 💕

Dovakel

Something about me? Well, I listen to NSFW audios at work. Yes, in my office. I like to live on the wild side. lol 😎

Yuzuriha

I feel you on this. I am the biggest introvert. I don't really use social media alot but I really like it here. I feel like I can talk and express myself and not feel ashamed about anything. Being here has definitely helped with bringing me out of my shell. I don't know how to deal with drama or interacting with people either so I mostly stay to myself or hang out the people that I'm comfortable with. But I know that I will get through it and so will you. We got this! 😊

Kuro-Hime

I'll be short and sweet, your audios have helped me more than I care to admit. I love the stories, I love to do art with it in the background and just see where it takes me. I appreciate your sense of spice, and all of your comforts. I look forward to more story stuff whenever you get to it. Thank you, Cece.

Skys_undeniable

Kinda anxious to say anything, but hey, this'll probably get buried anyway. We're actually a DID system, and we have some BNHA fictives in our system! Not all of us really identify with our sources, but for some of us these comfort kind of audios are actually really calming. Shoto listens to the Hawks ones on loop lol Our system has been through a lot. We're still not in a good place, and we're trying really hard to move somewhere better. For now we're just trying to make it through each day.

Muse Songbird

I have got to be one of the oldest fans of CeCe. I'm in my mid 30s (eep!)and not afraid to admit this shit is my addiction! I have always been an odd duck and never really had friends til middle school. Kids teased me for not having parents (my sister and I were raised by my grandparents),had braces in 2nd grade, glasses in 5th and was the biggest loser. People hated me and made fun of my clothes, hair, everything. Middle school I gained friends, changed my persona. High school I was known as Spike due to having a spiked collar and wearing black heavy metal/rock t-shirts and baggy jeans. I wore for 2 1/2 years and I was the unsung hero to many kids I never associated with. Pretty sure teachers were scared of me too. I matured Junior year and became more of the person I am now. I had kids at 20 and 21 and that was so hard. My kids dad left me when my son was barely 1. I've been single since 2008 but I got through college, and a better career(after working at Wendy's for 14 years, 12 in management) after nearly 16 yrs later. CeCe has made my life so much better in the sense of her audios and I appreciate it.

Bad4magik

I think that you don’t truly understand how much you help people. I want you to know how much people can get a release from the world with your work. You post many different levels and emotions it is amazing. I am a high functioning empath. It is severe enough that before I knew how to harness it they offered medication. Now I am finishing up school to be a psychologist and use my “imperfections” to help others in a healthy outlet. Due to the fact that I give to others most of my day I really like to be able to come home and recharge. I crave intellect more than the physical. I love some of the posts due to your use of vocabulary. They make me smile. Some thing that the Romance language is dead but I feel that you are amazing at your art. And you put just the right amount of spice to balance it perfectly 😏

Jessica Ranum

Hey, my names Denise I’m 29. I was a teen mom at 15 & have 2 amazing kids. My daughters father was a bit older than me & very manipulative & abusive, I finally got the courage to get up & leave & met my sons father. I’ve been with him for the past 13 years & have never been happier. I’m a lpn & im such a loner lol. I have some friends but mainly because I feel obligated to keep them as friends since we all knew each other since middle/high school (if that makes sense lol). They don’t have much in common with me, makes fun of my love & art for anime. They tell me it’s for “children” etc all that crap lol. So I’m glad to see this chain full of non judgmental people from all over sharing stories & being able to be themselves. Go us!!

I just realised that was a lot of words lol, was nice to get it out of my head tho

E

Random dump of stuff: TW for negative topics Sometimes I have days where I get very fragile. I can’t tell anyone coz I don’t know how to describe it or without it being awkward. I feel so breakable and I just want to be treated super gently. I get super aware of tone and start crying at every little thing. It happens every so often and I’m not sure why. I’m normally alone so it’s okay but when I’m not I just want to not have to speak and let myself be quiet and sensitive. I suffer with a lot of stuff so having days like this are refreshing but when I speak to people on these days I have to mask it and like act all brave when i just kinda wanna be looked after. Today is one of them and I just kinda want a hug but I know I will cry if I do and then I have to explain that I’m crying for no reason at all. Also I get repeating nightmares a lot and recently I keep having one where I die in them. Like actually feeling myself die and it all go black. It’s really scary even if in the dreams it’s not always for realistic reasons (dinosaur lol). I don’t know why I keep having them or why they won’t stop but it’s honestly killing the vibe and I’d much rather dream of like happy stuff. Also my friends watch anime but more casually than I do. Which is fine but every so often they mention something and say stuff like “yeah I don’t get how people…” or “I like anime but like I honestly could never..” it’s always light hearted and I’m not upset but it’s funny coz I enjoy a lot of the stuff they mention so I’m kinda sat there like ‘oop’ like I play otome games and simp over anime characters and watch trashy romance stuff which is a side of anime they don’t really enjoy or get involved in. It’s funny and they wouldn’t care I’d they know I liked it but there have been multiple occasions I’m like shit I gotta change my wallpaper before they come over coz it’s like a self Insert commission with 2 anime dudes or some shit lmao Also I suffer with a lot of mental health stuff so I don’t see family too often. Every time I finally do join in or be social they make a comment like wow or act as though It means I’m suddenly “cured” but then when u try to join in conversations or actively make an effort to join in they speak over me and ignore me. Like nothing I have to say is of any interest. Then they wonder why I stay in my room and don’t come to family events. I’m going on holiday with them next week and whilst I’m looking forward to getting away I’m also like :/. Coz even the idea of being with them for that long has drained my social battery. Also mental health support where I am is shit. I know I am nerodivergent but the process in getting a diognosis is so difficult and when dealing with the stuff that comes with being nerodivergent ontop of depression and an anxiety disorder it’s like impossible to actually get help. Also Covid cases are doing up and I’m not going to be able to go on the trip I was allowed to get for myself since my mum knew I wasn’t gonna enjoy the family holiday so I’m super sad coz i don’t leave the house much so this was my one thing i get and now it’s not happening. Honestly the last 4 years have been exactly the same. I dropped out of education and am not mentally able to do anything. I’m not planning on going anywhere (life wise) but I’m really bored and wish something would change coz it’s hard having repeatedly bad days. I feel like I’m always waiting. Idk what for but Im just waiting for something to be different. I want more friends with my specific interests just coz I’m not able to share a lot or have anyone to freak out over stuff with and it’s lonely having no one to share my favourite things with Ugh anyways I’m a negative person and I’m self aware of that but it still makes having hope super hard, I want a fish but I don’t have room for a tank and Disney stores are apparently closing down. So I would summarise by saying I’m coping. My life is not at all how I want it to be and i don’t feel like I’m doing anything with it but I’m drawing so much now and I have my own room and I got a commission done from my fave artist ever and i got a sewing kit so I managed to fix my teddy that had a hole so I’m okay today.

E

Career advice question if you don't mind! I'd love to become a cognitive psychologist in the future! I'm a first year teacher now trying to save up money for graduate school and I was wondering if you had any advice on schools or resources to use to really make me stand out? Not exactly the advice you offered to give but I hope that's okay!

Angelina Vargas

I have a lot to say but I won't. I don't feel comfortable in sharing my thoughts, opinions, likes or dislikes in real life or online. Every time I tried sharing even a small part of myself I was only met with condescending responses, everyone was suddenly in the same exact situation, or "you're just lazy and looking for attention". I felt and feel only judged and mocked. Therapy is equal to zero for me, all it did was to make things worse instead of helping. So yeah I won't share anything except for the fact that I trust and love absolutely no one. Except for Hawks. (I don't trust him but I love him). That's all.

Tw: Cheating, Divorce, emotional abuse My parents marriage is failing, I see it, they see it, but they refuse to acknowledge it and it sucks! My mom won’t leave because she wants to make a decision not based on emotions. Mind you, my dad has cheated on her twice and degrade her so bad that he kept her in bed depressed all day. In my house The father is always right. Call him out on something he’ll put you down, have a different opinion he will put you down, question his authority he will put you down. I wish they could get a divorce

Silverpancakes

Hi! What kind of art are you doing, what medium? Have you asked the studios and zines that rejected you for reasons or input on what they didn't like, or what you should change? Not all of them might give feedback or even respond at all but you have nothing to lose in asking. Just giving my 2 cents here.

I absolutely adore the idea of a weekly collective journal :3 Honestly, I feel a bit anxious sharing something, but here goes nothing I had a really toxic relationship with one person for 12 years (since childhood basically). And last year I've finally reached my limit with them and got out. Or so I thought. This year they reached out to me three times already, and it makes me really anxious and uncomfortable. Even though I know that they're no good for me, that they traumatized me, I still can't help but care for them. I want them to be happy and loved, but also want to be left alone as well. And for the last couple of days I've been avoiding social media (like a coward I am) simply because I can't bring myself to answer them. I know that it's ridiculous but this whole situation is stressing me out. I guess it's just trauma talking Well, that was a lot x)) Thank you for reading if someone did! And I hope that all of your problems and worries will eventually pass, and you'll be able to smile happily through it all 💞 (Sorry, I'm not really good with words, but this community means a lot to me. And every single one of you deserves to be loved and cared for) Love you all! 💖

Cognitive Psychologist here! I'm happy to listen and offer any advice,sounds like everyone here has a lot going on and I'm happy to see a strong support here. Safe places like this are super important and I'm thankful Yagami has added this. Be healthy and kind to each other,and do the same for yourselfs. Let me know if anyone needs anything!

Not really venting but… reading through these, I’m so overwhelmed with emotion. I just want to say that even if we all don’t know each other in real life, I love you. I love how far you’ve come and I am so proud that you’re still here on planet Earth because it is not easy being here. I just want to tell each and every one of you how powerful you are (even on the days you don’t feel it, you still are). Please always remember to give your self love (even when it’s hard) because you deserve it and then some. Get some self care in and drink plenty of water. I’m proud of you all for voicing your truths✨ I’m always here if anyone needs to talk, vent or make friends💜

SpaceSpice

Your life is yours and you should go for it (when you have enough saved)! It’ll be so worth it and I fully support you💖💖💖

queeneli

Remember you are loved! And your happiness is the most important thing💖💖whatever you feel you need to do for your mental health and overall happiness is worth it, no matter what anyone else thinks! ily

queeneli

YOURE SO CUTE😭😭💖ILY Hmm lemme think. Last month was a terrrible month for me, I don’t think I’ve felt that bad since I was dealing with awful depression and ptsd 2 years ago. Idk why but everything just came crumbling down on me & anything that would usually bring me joy made me feel worse bc I was scared I wouldn’t be able to get out of that dark spot again. But I did! And I actually feel really good right now and it’s thanks to literally all of you, especially YOU, Cece. There’s like some magic in your audios, whenever I listen to the comfort ones (mostly from my bby hawks), I feel like I’m not alone & there’s so much more to life than these awful feelings. It really dug me out of that hole and I’m learning to deal with bad things that happen to me in a better way. I know this bc last week my mom had to be rushed to the hospital and it was the first time I’d ever had to call the police in my life, usually I would be deep into a panic attack bc that’s literally my biggest fear to have something happen to my family like that but I was able to deal with it and for the first time, control my anxiety and I just kept telling myself everything would be okay. I listened to your audios while I waited for her at the hospital and at the end of the day, it was just heat stroke (the weather is effing crazy rn) and she’s much better now. This was super long & maybe too much but the point is I’m becoming a better person and I’m learning to treat myself better and be kinder to myself when I go back to that dark place.

queeneli

I struggle with suicidal thoughts, I've had severe anxiety and depression from an early age. Like everyone I have my good and bad days, I have healthy outlets that lets me deal with my depression and anxiety. I love this community and feel safe sharing, thank you Cece! The idea for these posts to be a type of diary is a great idea. We get to know each other in a more intimate and less superficial way, and I can't wait to get to know these beautiful beings!

CharityBelle

i’m so close to quitting my job, dropping out of college and moving somewhere i don’t know anyone cause i just can’t anymore…but i don’t have money saved up yet

tiny_tonyyy

Yall I want to quit my job so bad but I can't quit. I am having the worst day today and it feels like nothing is going to get done. So ya anyway - I hope everyone else's day is going better than mine. Yall are gems and Cece is amazing 😚

lexA

Thank you for the kind words! I just want you to know that you are strong and you will get through this. I've found comfort in remembering all the good times my dad and I shared. Laughing helps so much! Whenever you have the urge to find comfort in drugs, replace it with something positive. Journaling, yoga.....Stay strong, you got this! I know your dad is at your side! -hugs- ❤️❤️❤️

Courtney Johnson

I love this idea ^,^ , going to read them all later when I feel a little better. since this is a vent place, I'm sooooo sick , not contagious or anything just have zero energy today but I have so much to do. didn't plan on getting photos taken for a new treaty card but its by appointment only now annd I can't miss it. I look like a zombie apparently 💀 also i saw someone worried people would make fun of cece for her sharing posts and you kno what, people like that are going to do it anyway, I dont think cece should limit herself from writing what she wants just because of a few bullies , just my thoughts

Faye

Hey guys. Basically wanna say that I was really really fucked up for a long time and I had a hard time letting go of ppl who weren’t good for me bc I didn’t wanna be alone. But turns out being alone was the best thing ever for me. Single 3 years. Working on loving myself and finding out who I really am. And I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. Letting go hurts but it’s worth it. Make room for the GOOD ppl meant to be in ur life and never settle. Also when they come. Remember. You DO deserve them.

DaLila Senpai

I understand OctoQueen. Don't beat yourself up on those courses; I'm also an engineering student (specifically ADEG courses) and I still haven't finished because the staff kept trying to advise me to take multiple classes when I can't do that (ADHD/ADD) and fucked me over by suspending my financial aid (I was forced to work to pay $500 per class per semester) and Rona came and fucked it all up AFTER I quit my job to go back to school with the money I had then used it all to pay bills for the first month of Rona. I've been out of school for over a year now, almost two. Idk if you want my advice but just take a breath dude. You've clearly been through a lot so at least ask the people who can be reasonable "Can you extend the time" or "Give me a minute, I need to do these assignments". I'm sorry about your ex. All I can say; Fuck 'em. They really hurt you and I don't stand for anyone being hurt in any way. I hope things only get better and that you blossom radiantly and only succeed.

spudmuffin

Okay. Here I go. I really wish I could stand up for myself better as well. When I try to voice my opinion on anything or try to get my thoughts out I feel like I'm bothering people sometimes or I literally panic and go back into my introvert self. I have a really strong support group of friends who always push me and I'm grateful for them 😊😊 I'm getting better and I hope anyone else who struggles with anything will continue to fight. You are loved, appreciated, and so strong. Love yourself the most of all 😊

Kuro-Hime

Oh man, I guess it's rant time. I've been on leave of absence because I was severely depressed and overworked. It was getting to a point where I didn't know if I'd actually survive my last semester of college. I'm an engineering student and college has been whooping my ass like crazy and I just feel so stupid. Last year brought all kinds of hell even before the rona. I had a panic attack and had to go home early for spring break, my ex broke up with me, the school packers stole half my items including my thesis project and my social security info, and my dad and I are on the outs because he doesn't want to get vaccinated. I've also been struggling with the concept of not working and cry because I'm so frustrated with myself. I recently realized the extent of the damage my abusive ex had on me and my desire for sex and relationships. Now I'm going back to school and I'm so scared I won't be able to finish my thesis and pass my classes and that I'll fall back into that dark pit I was in last year. I have a commission, book illustrations for my grandma, and my thesis to work on this summer and there isn't much time left. Ugh that felt good to release. 😤

OctoQueen

alright here goes nothin, so last month my dad died and due to the stress and anxiety and depression that came with the traumatic circumstances, i found myself relapsing on drugs. i get no comfort from the people around me so the lil comfort audios have helped me a lot during this. it’s just a lil something to help me feel less alone

I love my mom but she keeps playing matchmaker between me and a male friend even though we have both said flat out that we have no interest in dating. It's annoying as it is but especially now shes telling my grandmother, who is likely to pass any day from cancer, about us it's actually making me very angry. I have enough other stuff to deal with without her loading her want for me to get a partner on top of it

i just lost my dad last month. it truly has been a whirlwind but u fkn got this i promise u. he loves you and is always with you

Haha feeling a little nervous about this but, I'm gonna try after reading a few others. I think I'm lonely. I don't really have any friends and to the one thats sticking around I'm being really shitty to. I know i need to be a better friend and reach out more but, I'm so used to being alone and hanging out by myself i keep forgetting i need to contact them first too. I never have anything to talk about, or anything of interest to say even when i do say hey i know they must be bored. I don't know how to entertain them or fill the silences. I think that's what draws me to cece's comfort audios. I don't have to force myself to be more social and i can pretend my company is enjoyed. I know its a little self centered to think people must have an opinion of you even if negative but, these feelings aren't coming from nowhere. I don't really understand why I'm not connecting with others. Its even more baffling when the conversation is good and in person too! Whew that feels a little better to say out loud haha :3

Oppai-Senpai

Howdy y'all!! I guess I can start with me feeling lonely. I've made so many friends at college, and meet so many wonderful people online, but when it comes to meeting new people in the real world, I'm stuck. I'm an ambivert, but with no friends in my hometown, its hard. And it sucks, especially living in such a big city. I feel like it should be easy, but I dunno. Maybe I should go out, but how do I do that alone? Anyway, thanks for listening, and y'all are so sweet ❤❤

Claire A

I just really miss my dad. It's going on 3 months since he passed away. This summer has really been a whirlwind.

Courtney Johnson

Join clubs!!! You meet people with at least one common interest there and that's how you start!

Claire A

I realized that I don't really have any friends, it's not that I don't want them but that I've not been in an environment with people my own age for long enough that I don't know how to engage. I can be pleasant and become an acquaintance of almost anyone but I don't have any idea how to move past that step. It doesn't help that the last time I did have the chance to be around people my own age I was being isolated by someone I thought was my friend. They kept me from everyone else while belittling me and making me feel like no one would want me even if I could get away. She made sure I couldn't date, or that anyone else that seemed like they wanted to be close to me was kidding, evil, or would eventually realize who was and leave anyways. She still called me her best friend. She did it for so long that I didn't know how to make friends after her or even be close to anyone, I was so used to waking on eggshells. Then she got a boyfriend, and then she left. I thought it was my fault for so long and it took so much therapy to understand how cruel her actions could be. But now I have no one, and I don't even know where to start. I'm going to college in the fall and I want to make friends but I don't even know how to do that anymore. I guess I'm just afraid I'll be alone forever if it keeps up.

Thank you for your offer & kindness which we can all use more of. 🙂🥰

well first things first. Hello everyone 😃 thank for being a strong and awesome community. Also thank you Cece for always being there for your fans. We are here to help you and for each other. 😁👋💖 ok now time to vent a little.......🤔 well I there alot of things I would love to vent about and get off my chest. But let's start out on who I am as a person. I come a cultured background and that culture is slowly dying soon there won't be alot of us left. 😑 in today's society we bearly acknowledge or excist. It's kind of frustrating at times but not much can be done about that...how much every race suffered...it's terrible on how every race is treated. 😑 sorry started out on a heavy topic. Sorry about that just kind of wanted to get that off my chest.. Anyhow... long story short I am very much anti social (due to the anxiety) I have friends ( not alot just like 2 I can say) some say they are my freinds but are very much two faced.... I try to get along with everyone to the best of my abilities. I really do , but it's hard. Most people use me for their own needs and when they don't need me treat me diffrent . I hate it 😔 ... it's the same with my family I have only 3 members of my family that I can really count on the others have their own demons to battle and due to many years being exposed to that kind of environment kinda .... makes me the person to keep my feelings buried way deep down and have some other problems. Mostly letting other people run my life or how to raise my own kid....enough is enough is what I would like to say out loud. But ended up moving instead. 😑🤚 I start my new job tomorrow feeling lots of anxiety. I just wanna cover myself in covers in a dark room surrounded by pillows and never have to interact with anyone....but such of a life of a parent I can't. 😑 well I think 🤔that's enough today. I would love to vent more about my life 😄 but will save it for another time. But thank you guys and cece for making my dark world have some light in it. Revelry in the dark😑✊ thanks for letting me vent.

luna s

This is really sweet of you. It always stuns me in a proud way (might be weird to say XD) what an unbelievably wholesome community you've built, and I'm proud of the friends I've made on here, too. Animals, nature, affection, art and coffee pretty much sum me up. I guess for me, I'm a bit hypocritical in the sense I don't think of myself very often. I get up, take care of the fluffs and get to work, only giving myself rest shortly before bed. I love writing. It's that along with always being in imaginary land that drove me to be an author. I always write fantasy, isekai/medieval styles, to educate on animals as well as deeper looks in all sorts of relationships. How others treat one another has always been so important to me, as well as how we treat our planet. Someone else's safety is always above mine in my eyes. I began workouts at a young age, but I've only told a couple people why. It was to feel safer in my own skin after a few things happened. I always want to feel control within my own body and what I'm capable of, or of helping someone else. The thing I'm guilty of is I take my stress/anxiety out via workouts as well, which has landed me in the hospital from pulled/torn muscles throughout my body on multiple occasions. ^^' Now my man and a housemate keep tabs on me every evening to make sure I don't do that anymore and stick to an hour or less. It scares me when I've skipped even a day of doing art or writing, that I'm letting time slip by to the point I've gone months working and neglected friends. Then I'd make it up by gaming with them, skipping days of art, causing stress workouts. I'm slowly finding a balance. Cosplay became my saving grace at a young age, feeling 100% comfortable in my body - always cosplaying male characters.

Yep Yep

A place to vent? Just what I've been needing. I've been going through a rough patch this past week. I just learned that my mother has been having an ongoing affair with a married man for the past 13 years. This is not the first time my mom was caught having an affair with this man. The first time, she swore up and down that she had left him, that she was going to get help and the whole song and dance. Turns out, that was all a lie. She's being hooking up with him for 13 years and lying to everyone this whole time. My Dad has finally said enough is enough and filed for divorce yet she still has the Nerve to act like she did nothing wrong in carrying on with this affair. I am hurt, I am angry, and I am so disappointed in her. In the fact that she chose to lie and hurt us all for this long. I want to yell and scream, and oust the Guy for being a Scumbag, cause he doesn't deserve to get off scot-free either. Everything is a mess. On top of that, I went in for my annual physical, told my doctor I've been having some issues with the Lady Bits, turns out I may have a condition that will make it extremely difficult, if not impossible for me to ever have children (still waiting on test results). Which adds to the suckiness of this week......I've always wanted kids, but if I can't have them naturally.....adoption is expensive and difficult.....especially if you are single. It feels like everything is crumbling, my dreams are cracking at the seams and....I feel alone in it all.

That is scary, I'm so sorry you're going through that. I went through a period of panic attacks and anxiety brought on by existential dread and, it turns out, being lowkey allergic to one of my allergy medications. I was constantly afraid my heart would get tired of pounding so hard and just stop beating if I wasn't awake and paying attention it. Apparently, sometimes otherwise unexplained anxiety is a symptom of something being out of whack physically. For me, guided meditation before bed and switching meds to something I wasn't allergic to helped tremendously.

H. Banana

I was academically disqualified from my University this year, part of it was due to Covid but the rest was my own immaturity- further leading into stress then bad mental health, I'm even talking to a therapist for the first time in my life. I feel stupid and like a failure, but I'm still taking the choice to continue in community college then transfer. It's my goal and dream to be an English teacher and I don't care how long it takes, I'm going to get there. It's hard though, I'm first generation and oldest sibling- I'm supposed to pave the way and be the example. My parents don't believe in me anymore, they say I'm not advancing in life, and it just hurts to be the only one trying to remain positive for myself.

?. poor liolllpo9. on a

Lisa Russo

Well, ever since I started college things have been quite difficult for me. I'd have panic attacks, and eat so much more because of all the anxiety. I gained weight and don't really feel pretty anymore. I've always been the kind of girl to be a bit chubby and to gain weight easily but still. I had dark thoughts so many times and I found the name for my mental state (I cried when I heard it). I broke up with my now-ex girlfriend, and tried to slowly get better tho. I cut my hair reallllllllly short (I love it) and got vaccinated so I could go and spend time with my grandpa! Right now I'm feeling sick so I'm laying on my bed with a comfort audio in my ears. I sometimes thing about my past girlfriend, and notice how toxic our relationship was, even tho I still have feelings for her. She really messed me up really bad and after 5 months I felt some butterflies in my stomac for an other girl. Well, we met en Genshin and she lives in an other country but I don't want a relationship with her, I'll just let my heart get those butterflies and they'll go away soon enough 😌 I'm still crying my eyes out sometimes and feel really anxious and depressed, but good things are here too 🧡🧡

the_URBAN_goose

Honestly, I’m so ready to quit my job right now. I’m so tired of being treated like the dirt under someone’s shoe, but I’m literally one of THE MOST valuable people there. I’m trained in everything, I’m comfortable with everything, so why am I still being told “not yet,” or “soon?” It’s been three years, and yet here we are. I’m sick of being a door mat and letting everyone walk all over me, and I’m sick of being treated like I don’t know anything. It’s getting to the point where I feel like I’ve been doing everything wrong and no one has been telling me. It’s making me question if I’ve chosen the right career path, and it’s honestly really stressful.

Elizabeth Olson

Mines is more relationship issues where I feel like I don't know what to do. So this place has been a solice for me.🌹

切島の小石

My heart felt heavy and shed tears reading all about you guys' situations. Especially knowing that the person who's helped this much people is suffering too. My heart goes out to all of you, no matter who you are. I hope all of us can find happiness in our lifetime and make peace with this cruel world.

I struggle withy sexuality every day. My family is very…conservative, let’s call it, when it comes to that stuff. I’ve been in the closet for years but that is my choice. Those who know me know I’m attracted to both men and women. As far as my relatives are concerned, I’m straight as an arrow lol. I struggled with finding a term for who I am and I keep flickering between bisexual/pansexual/biromantic/panromantic. And then I realized you don’t NEED labels. You are who you are, you like who and what you like, and it’s no one else’s business but yours and the people you want to share it with. You don’t HAVE to identify as anything or call yourself anything, unless you specifically want to. It became a lot easier for myself to be more open about my sexuality once I realized labels would only confine me further. That said, if you DO want to be labeled as something, you can always talk about it to me (and I’m sure everyone else would be open to listen, since that is the point of this thread to begin with), and we will be more than happy to help you figure things out :)

Dandylion

OK here I go .... lately life has been really tough and I'm not saying life wasn't tough before... but its like all the past trauma keeps flooding back and I don't know how to handle it ... like my younger self really thought it was all her fault and I just want to tell her she is doing fine cause its like sad an 8 year old praying to die and I get this weird attacks where I break down and I'm scared and I literally don't have anyone to talk with because my best friend who was my ride or die left cause her mum is really conservative and thought we were dating yet we weren't amd I tried so hard to prove it to both our parents but there was no situation in which I won ... and the only brother figure I had literally just manipulated me to sending him explicit photos and I trusted him and my parents won't take my health matters seriously until I fainted on the dentist x Ray room ... I haven't sleep for 2 nights and a day or eat properly... and I still think its my fault ... if I hadn't been too friendly maybe I'd still have my best friend if I had seen the signs of his manipulative behaviour ... if I just hadn't fallen sick . To top it off I'm a big girl and everyday either my mum or myself highlight faults and I just wish I wasn't in my own body and worst thing is I can't even show anything is wrong I have keep smiling and laughing like I'm ok yet I'm constantly thinking of how this life is a drag and it maybe better if I left .... but you know life 😃 I hope everyone is having a great day though

Phyllis

I found out I was pregnant a few months ago and things have been so crazy for me. These audios have been nothing but a great way for me to destress and ignore the world I deal with on the daily. I can barely work because of my pregnancy but I have to to keep my home and life going. I feel like my life is at a weird stop but all I want is to see my baby and start a new part of my life. I feel like I've been neglecting my friends and family but my mental state has been nothing but quiet thoughts that I don't really wanna hear so I end up sleeping so often. I feel like I take my partner for granted becuase I can't control my emotions anymore and just haven't been able to express myself how I use to. Idk where I'm going with any of this but I'm glad I could say something. I hope you all are able to get over your own demons and gain the blessings you deserve.

Itachissimp

I STARTED GOING TO THERAPY! I’ve struggled with anxiety for a long time and been dealing with it by myself all throughout my life. College wasn’t much help either, I was struggling with low grades which made my anxiety worse and after talking to some of my professors they recommended me getting a plan where I can get more time on my quizzes and exams. But the thing is I would have to speak to therapist first so she could write me a recommendation letter of some sort about it. At worst I was not looking forward to it because I’m shy and have a bit of social anxiety as well, and I didn’t want to talk about what I was going through, by now after 3 months of seeing her I feel so refreshed! And even a bit happier, I learned so much about myself and my anxiety that I never knew before. So I’m very proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone! I’m also less anxious around crowds now and can sorta kinda keep a conversation with strangers XD

IPinkyI

I'll guess I'll write here too, since I am going through a bit of a pinch rn: Last night, I had a breakdown over me realizing that I wasted a whole year over this damn virus. Not only that, but that year was my first year as a post college grad, and before COVID hit, I was working a job as an after school art teacher for an elementary school with a class full of third to fifth grade kids. For the most part, I was feeling really miserable. The kids would hardly pay attention to me, I would have a breakdown there at least every few weeks, and it was just overall a bad experience. During this, I was also having a really rocky time with my mental health, and my relationship with my then partner/boyfriend was almost going down the toilet, and was also taking a break off social media to focus on my relationship, job, and trying to look into therapy. Needless to say, it was a miserable time between those and my job, and the outcome was that I started therapy and have been on it for a year, my partner and I broke up (we're still on good terms with each other as best friends, but I took it really hard when that happened, and it also happened during the beginning of lockdown, and also involved a shitty guy that tried to use the both of us sexually, so weee, trauma), and I went back on social media bc I needed an escape from real life and was making me go stir crazy. Then when COVID hit, I got laid off and went on unemployment. During that time, I figured out I was fully asexual (I ID'd as Demiromantic Cupiosexual, but now I'm Demiromantic Asexual), I'm currently experimenting with both she/her and they/them pronouns (I ID'd as just she/her), cut off a friendship that was very mentally abusive and gaslighting with my other friends (and he also shit talked about me behind my back, lowering my trust in people for a bit), and my mom going on a rocky path with her health. And ofc, I discovered you, Cece! It's been a big help with my mental health with what you do, and it always makes smile with your comfort audios, and have also helped me with my trauma with the guy that tried to use me sexually (I was repulsed on what happened, but whenever I listen to Hawks or any other audio that's sexual, I always feel... Safe. I've never had that in an audio, but it's really helped me a lot, so thank you~), so thank you for doing what you do, Cece. But also during this time, I was (and still currently am) collecting unemployment checks every week, up until yesterday when I realized I forgot to collect my check for last week when I had to file for this week. I'm currently in a state of panic because I worry that I might lose my pandemic benefits from my unemployment that help me out dearly bc of that missed week. I'm currently looking into jobs on Indeed that way I don't live off unemployment forever, and, gods forbid, the worst happens with losing those benefits, but during that, I had that realization that I've wasted a part of my life, a year in my 20's, a year that's vital to post college grads my age should have, due to a damn virus. Now I feel lost, and I don't know what to do in terms of a job. Sure, I have a degree to prove that I'm worthy of it, but I want to do other things too, yet I don't know what it is. I feel like a wandering soul in a universe with no purpose, and I feel.. hollow and empty. Sorry for this book worth of writing, but I hope y'all can understand, and maybe can relate to as well. Stay safe and have a good day, everyone ♥️

Sammy

Congrats!!

When I was in highschool my anxiety got so bad I developed a seizure disorder. All my panic attacks where seizures basically. My family isn't the best so I would get belittled more than I was already. I also have ptsd and just recently found out I have bi polar disorder that was never treated. So you can already guess the amount of sleep I was getting, non existent lol. I remember the first time listening to a sleep aid from Cece I cried because it was the first time I had gotten a solid sleep in a while. Cece you have my greatest thanks and I hope you are doing well. Thanks for listening

BalanceDweller

A place to vent?! Oooo this is what I needed! Does anyone know how frustrating it is to love your life and not have depression or any problem with mental health except for having the worst anxiety all cause the thought of dying is terrifying!? My anxiety attacks are at an all time high right now and the worst part is NOBODY CAN HELP! I cant get any sleep cause right as I'm about to I wake up gasping for air cause I sometimes dont breath in my sleep and THATS SCARY AND IT MAKES EVEYTHING WORSE! So... in conclusion to all this... anyone want to be friends?

I JUST GOT MY RECOMMENDATION FOR TOP SURGERY YYEEEYEEYSHSJ AND IM OVER THE FREAKING MOON 🙌🤧💖👏🤩🌙💥

kiricake

I was recently broken up with by a very manipulative bf who talked about the girl he used to like before me basically the entire relationship which may have only been a month but he blamed me for our relationship ending when I did nothing but try and make our relationship stronger and tried pushing him to better himself and he really basically just used me and so I’ve been blaming myself but trying to get over it and honestly the Hinata audio for breakups, the Dabi audio for anger, and the Kuroo sleep aid has been helping me so much since he broke up with me it’s helped me feel less alone and it’s kept me from 100% blaming myself for someone else’s mistakes I’m really trying to do better for myself but my BPD has been acting up a lot lately it would be nice to have an audio for people who suffer from BPD but honestly just the comfort audios in general have helped so much and hopefully soon I’ll be better and out of the hole I’ve allowed him to drag me into

bunnybabee

Well, this year I have been in recovery mode. Last year, I had a full time job, was in grad school part time and had started working out with a personal trainer and was just doing well overall. I would think with all of those positives I would be happy but in reality, I hated my job, I didn’t like my living situation and I was unsure about my major. Eventually, I ended up taking a job in another state and went through the process of my goodbyes with everyone and quitting my job but after moving up there, I found out they weren’t going to pay me and it was some pyramid scheme. So, I had to figure out how I would move back home and face everyone. Long story short, I did move back home and my living situation was worse because of tension within my household and I had stopped working out, dropped my classes and had no job. It became really hard to bear and I went through a dark period during the end of last year and beginning of this year. Often, I woke up crying, couldn’t sleep at night and just couldn’t bear to look at myself without breaking down. I still have days that get hard for me but not as much as before. Your audios are the one consistent thing I’ve had during everything up until now and they’ve really helped me pick myself back up. I started grad school again and changed my major to something fascinating. I’ve started drawing and using all of my fun drawing tools again. Now, I’m trying to find a new job and get back into working out. I’m planning on applying to the JET Program this year and I’m really hoping I’ll be able to get in. I’m also hoping to start drawing my own manga again soon but that’s a dream that may or may not happen. Depends on how everything goes this year. I want to thank you for giving us this safe space and I appreciate you and everything you do!❤️ You’re amazing!✨

Janaeberries

Lately I’ve been losing interest in things I normally love doing. I keep pushing people away and pushing the feelings deeper because I don’t time right now to process them correctly. I’m ending my internship this week and have to finish all my work and do a major presentation. Then I also have finals for this one class left that I can’t fail. Then I also have to somehow get a new car to go for my last year of college. As for friends I’ve tried my best to stay close but I feel bad for not being as happy right now. And my boyfriend of 5 years has to move away again so distance is going to be another struggle come fall…it’s just been way too much too quickly. I haven’t felt like my work was anything special so I’m starting to hate it and I haven’t felt completely relaxed in so long it’s just been exhausting. I haven’t written or even admitted everything going on to myself yet but it feels good seeing everything wrapped up in one lovely paragraph haha. I hate to sound like I complain about everything cause I know people have it worse and I’m getting by it’s just taking a big toll on me. I appreciate anyone who took the time to listen to what’s been my whacky life right now <3

Smor

I've wanted to vent to someone for a while, so I guess now is one of my chances to do so. My mom was never really a huge education person, like she wanted me to graduate and stuff but I could do what I wanted after. But since my parents split up a couple days after my birthday in 2019 (dec 6) she's been dating again and she found a new boyfriend that kinda changed her mind on my education plans. She now wants me to join extra curricular activities, (like my new sisters 🤷‍♀️) be more active and go to college. I have found out recently that I don't really want the stress of college in my life. I have the feeling it wouldn't be good for my mental health. But I have no idea how to tell my mom and her boyfriend would definitely disagree and I really don't like disappointing anyone. And I'm only a teenager. I do have a job to help my mom (and I also pay for this account myself) but I just feel like everyone is rushing my life around me without me even seeing. But yeah you probably won't read this all lol. Thanks for the support chain 💞

Last year I came to the conclusion that I've been emotionally abused and used by my mother for like my whole life and now I don't know how to feel about it. Last year I moved out and got my first own apartment and I try to go back home as little as possible because I realised just how much my mother has damaged my view on my self worth. I've been struggling with both depression and anxiety (still am) thanks to all of that. Self harm have been one of my coping mechanisms but thanks to Cece I have started to switch it out with asmr, this place has really become my comfort corner where I don't have any expectations on myself. I have also just recently reached out to get an appointment with a doctor about ADHD, I don't know if I have it but there is a lot in that spectrum that I can relate to which has made me curious about if I have it or not. I have no one to talk to about it and I am scared of what this means. I tried bring up the subject about ADHD but she did not have a (in my opinion) nice view of those people which makes me even more distant towards her. I am scared and lonely but hopefully this appointment will help me. I kind of want them to say I have ut because then I have an explanation on everything that has been bothering me my whole life, is that wrong to wish? I have always thought that I was a bit different compared to others and when voicing this my mom said I just wanted attention. This made it very hard for me to be honest with people about my feelings. But it didn't stop there. All my friends have been or are in relationships except me and it have never really bothered me that much, and when they talk about their "sexual escapades" I have no idea what they talk about. This year I discovered Asexuality and wow if that wasn't an eye opener. I didn't feel so weird anymore but I was still to scared to set a label but I just got my blanket with the asexual flag on so I guess I consider myself as an asexual now. I have been talking to some friends who have supportive of my discovery but when I mentioned it to my mom (yeah I know why did I even bother) she said it was because I hadn't tried sex or met the right man yet. I have decided to not talk about such stuff with her anymore since she never seems to be very supportive in those moments. Slowly but surely I am trying to fight my way out of this dark pit, maybe one day I will see the light.

Jules

I don't usually write about things like this but considering the opportunity, it would be good for me. I have listened to almost every single comfort audio because I have had panic attacks from my PTSD lately and it's been the only thing to calm me down. I'm part of a corporate position in my work and the stress piles on, especially when said company doesn't know how to take care of its people. My stress point is calm now I may have broken a threshold, memories and feelings flood back that I never wanted to remember, but Ceces audios have been so helpful to show me I am not alone nor am I wrong for wanting to put my foot down. So much, no, TOO much personal things have happened that I was becoming lost and depressed. PLEASE never let yourself become so lost that I did because it took me years, almost a decade, to find peace and comfort. Take care of yourselves even if people tell you that you are selfish, self peace is never selfish nor lazy.

Leah Burns

I'm a single parent and things have been so stressful with home and work that alot of my hair is falling out. I've been seeing a therapist every week since the beginning of this year and its been helping but also bringing up alot of past trama ive been dealing with for 15+ years. Its been a crazy ride but these audios honestly help me to keep me from spiraling alot of times. I can listen while I'm at work at my desk. I put my headphones in and get to remove myself from all of the stress, even if it's just for a little while. Bless you Cece! Thank you guys!

I wish there was a clean-cut solution to this. First and foremost, I am really sorry for your loss. You speak very fondly of your pup so I know without a doubt, as an outsider looking in, that you truly did love her with all your heart. It’s amazing how pets can become part of our family and integrate themselves so much into our hearts. The process of mourning is a difficult one. It’s not as simple as “moving on” or “letting her go”. No matter how much people tell you that’s the right thing to do, it takes time and it’s different for everyone, though I don’t doubt your family’s heart was in the right place when they told you that. I wonder if your struggle with “moving on” is because you think that by doing so you’d forget her or betray her in some way? But that’s not what it means at all. It’s about learning to live with her loss and knowing she’s in a better place so she is not suffering anymore. That pup loved you unconditionally until her very last moments and when she passed, she did so surrounded by those who took care of her all her life. There is only so much we can do for our pets. If you can’t take comfort in knowing you’ve loved her with all your heart and taken care of her to the best of your abilities, at the very least know that if the doctors (who worked their whole lives with animals and know all the ins and outs of various diseases) did all they could, thus definitely so did you. We always wish we could do more to helps those we love in times of need but you gotta know we are limited in our abilities, and no matter how much we wish we could do we simply don’t have the right conditions to do so. I know it’s hard, I really do, and I know my words may not be what you want to hear because, like I said, I don’t have a solution to it. In order for you to let go of your guilt you have to come to terms with the fact that there is only so much you could have done and you did all your best. Inner peace starts with you and you alone. Trying to take your mind off of it may help, like investing in a hobby, just so you’re not wallowing in your grief every day. They say acceptance is the first step to move on from tragedy, so I think once all your puzzle pieces click together, you’ll be on the right path to forgive yourself.

Dandylion

Wish I could be less of a burden to my household.. I think maybe if I didn't suffer at their hands I could've been a daughter they could be proud of-like graduating highschool and having a job, maybe living on my own.. Instead I feel like a black sheep/outcast, but never show it when I'm around them. 😞 School was hard to really get into because of depression/anxiety/social anxiety or being the fat girl that kids liked to bully then coming home to abuse verbal/physical if I acted out or talked back etc. With me day dreaming in classes, staring out the window and doodling, or kind of focusing but not at the same time. Being a "gifted" child as well *sigh* with people around me saying I'm smart and shit like that.. Either way, I only have experience in archives and I couldn't live if I was an archivist. I hated doing archives so much like ughhh. I'd have to either be a janitor or in food service I guess.. I can't be a care taker/baby sitter though and I'd have to be able to have my own schedule as I can't be anywhere during weekdays until maybe after 6pm. *sigh* My dream job as a child was a waitress, but I see how people treat those in service so I'm really glad that I didn't pursue it.

Tabitha Guss

I'm also an older fan, so don't worry, you aren't alone! I am also self-conscious about it, but it is my secret pleasure, so I just enjoy it without guilt!

I have been depressed lately I just realized I have been single for a year now after a five year long relationship. The sad part is when my ex broke up with me he told me I felt more like a sister and that hurt me after 5 years together your going to tell me I feel like a sister. And we are still friends but I feel like him and me still being friends is just hurting me more i don't know what to do. I even found out after we broke up that he was talking to other girls and telling his friends we weren't dating and even tho all this I'm still friends with him. I feel like I put others first before myself.

Stephanie

I'm too tired to type much, but I will in future. I love you all hugsnkisses

MerC

I’d rather keep my Rl name private but my pup passed away and crossed the rainbow into heaven not to long ago. For years I’ve been taking care of her and took her to my states best neurologist and cardiologist because she suffered from seizures and heart disease which run in her breed. Iv been struggling to cope and come to terms that she’s in heaven. Spiritually I know she’s here with me but it’s still a struggle readjusting myself to not giving her medicine or feeding her or taking her out or just everything. My family has been encouraging me to let her go and even her doctor have told me that they knew my pup was incredibly loved and I had done everything I could. However I feel like I could have done more. I’m still mourning and my family has told me this is normal. I’m use to burying my emotions so this is all new to me and I’m struggling. I miss her so much and I don’t know how to properly cope with this.

Demongal101

Cece, you do an outstanding job. Personally my life has always been pretty rough and my escape was always either books, music or imagine a whole ass story or fan fiction in my own little world... I suffer from PTSD and ADD, so I often dissociate with reality or I'm unable to order my thoughts or even concentrate on the littlest things. Your audios, regardless of nswf, sfw, sleep aids, comforts or your own story (I love Caspin btw) help me so very often to get a grip on myself or make my thoughts go in order or take me out of a really terrible flashback. You have given me the courage to start writing down all those stories that are in my mind and gave me a lot of pointers or little details to start to actually write my own book! I love this community so much because of the massive support we all give to each other, regardless of what is happening, and all this is thanks to Cece. Venting is important and having a place where you can do it without the paralysing fear of getting shut down, ridiculed or misunderstood, that's absolutely priceless. You help so many people and think so little of you sometimes. I dont think anyone will ever get even the thought of you being lazy, hell you are so incredibly productive. You inspire, help, encouraged and saved a lot of people. I'm really proud of you and of all the supporters you have. Stay strong and always remember to breathe, life takes it's time, so does everything else. It's okay to have a bad day, week or whatever. ❤❤

Skylar

Yeah if you're ever worried u should post to the discord! Everyone is so nice there 💕

NuggetQueen

I understand how you feel with my job I'm working alot of hours and it makes me mad at alot of people to. My healthy outlit is like playing a few minutes of some calm music and I just sit in my room taking deep breaths. I don't know I'd this will help but I hope it does.

Stephanie

I'm so happy the audios help you 💕 Its little steps like this that help you take back your life. How are you lately? Have u thought about steps you want to take?

NuggetQueen

its crazy how i can 100% relate. i hope we can both get through this and it better for us in the long run!

nicole

I been going through school online and working. Recently i got nominated for something that deals with my online schooling and apparently its pretty big but i still don't understand it very well. But then my job was considering making me a cake decorator but then told me a couple days later that they gave the job to someone else since i have a "negative attitude" (which me being a bigger girl i have a hard time breathing and trying not to raise my anxiety for getting everything done. And i have a weird quirk looking up to help read my thoughts). I asked around and the reason they did it is to see if i could handle bad news but i guess it took more a mental toll on me then i thought. I been having a hard time staying focused on homework and been procrastinating hard and i been listening to some of kiris audios to keep my spirits up but still hard. Anyways i just wanted to vent and get off my chest thanks for reading.

My name is Therese (as you see) I'm 22. I have been bullied for over 9 years. Tried to commit suicide when I was 10. Abused when I also was 10. I got my first horse when I was 11 years old. I found a lot of comfort to my horse since I had no friends at all. During 1st grade to 9th grade I was bullied by my whole school (even the teachers bullied me). My mom is the best. She tried everything to stop the bullies, but it never worked. My safe place was on the back of my horse and my bedroom. I've had 4 horses total. I owned my first horse for 4 months. After that she died due to a parasite that couldn't be found after she died. After that I got to borrow a pony witch didn't last long either since the real owners started to hate us for some reason. Now I have my pony witch I've owned since 2011 and my big white horse I've owned since 2018. They have always been there for me and I will always love them. My father on the other hand is a workaholic. He worked a lot and never wanted to hang out with his family. To a sertain point my mom couldn't take it and left him and me (still had a great contactwith her). Then we all found out that my dad was an alcoholic as well. On my 15th birthday he tried to hang himself, but my mom saved him. He promised me to stop drinking, but he kept doing it until one day he hit my childhood friend in the head right in front of her father (who was his best friend). I moved away to live in a dorm during high school. I fell on love with a boy that apparently just used me to get to his ex (witch had the same name as me). After 2 years of just lies, he finally got close to his ex and dumped me through text. I got pissed so when he showed up at school I threw all the stuffs I got from him right to his face. All tho during high school I lived the best life. I had an awesome connection with my mom, I barley saw my dad and I got a lot of friends. After high school I meet another boy who lived really far away. I then started to work but got awfully treated by men (mostly). My first job my boss harassed me. Second job I got sexual harassed by a coworker. The boss didn't do shit to help and then the dude painted a lie that I was the "bad guy". I quit the job and when I finally had enough I left my home village to move in to my bf and here I am, writing my life story. Still love horses, anime since I was 11

Therese Lundgren

Drop your Etsy store name so we can go check it out 🥰

vang00gh

I currently do not get comfort, love, or sex in my relationship, so I am so happy to have these audios to fill that need in my life. It isn't the same as a real person, of course, but it always makes me feel better to hear that I am loved, cared for, and desirable. I love the inspiring words and the compliments that are included in so many of the audios. I only found YY last year, so I am still working my way through the YT story audios in order. It's taking a while, so I do listen to some of the newer ones, too! I just really want to express my appreciation for this content and how it has made a positive difference in my life.

I just read your previous post and now this one and I'm so happy to be part of this community. Thank you Cece ❤ I think I'm fine for the most part. It's just that I'm a little lonely since I don't have any friends to talk to and it is super hard for me to reach out, because I often feel like people wouldn't care anyway and also I don't want to bother them. I never had much people to talk to and the ones I had got to know other people and don't really talk to me anymore. Getting replaced kinda hurts, but I think I can deal with it. It has been like this for years now and you are helping me with your audios ❤ I mean I'm not completely alone, I live at my Mom's house and I have a boyfriend, but I just can't talk about the things that are on my mind with them. I tried it a lot of times, but they just don't understand. That's why I keep the things on my mind and my thoughts for myself. So most of the time I'm completely alone with my thoughts. It is sad but I think there are people who have to deal with way worse things than me. Also my cat Bonnie is with me and I love her so so much and she helped me to get out of depression a year ago. I'll be fine I guess. 💕

AngryFluffy

I always feel like I'm out of place and never really fit anywhere I go. I try to join communities but I always feel left out in the end. When I got to listen to Yato's audios, I somehow felt a little less lonely. The comforting lines from the audios you create makes me feel like I'm actually loved and cared for by this character. As soon as I knew about the content you were making, I decided to become a patreon. :) Now, I lull myself to sleep with your sleep aid audios ehe. I'm only on the 5$ tier though, I don't make that much but I still wanted to support even if it's just a little bit. Thank you for warming this lonely heart with your creations. I just wish, in the future, I'll find someplace where I feel like I belong.

How is it you always know how to make me smile and feel better on awful days. I appreciate you so much thank you for existing❣💜

tori pruneau

I realized that I'm depressive because of my family. I don't have enough privacy inside me house and despite the two graduations I've (the second one I'm finishing this year) and the especialization I've I'm not finding good jobs, even more that I'm a 30 years old person and the jobs around are very underpaid. Last Monday I was in heavy pain in my arm and I discovered a recent of trombosis on the veins in my armpits that might be caused by COVID, since the disease can cause that on people. Fortunately for me I didn't had symptoms of it but I'd the slightly idea that someone of the office I work as a trainee might had passed because this person were coffing and sneezing and not using the mask properly. A lot of many to paid the medicine for the Trombosis, money that I should be investing to get the things to furnish my own house, since I've a deadline of three years to get one place to live. Unfortunately I live in a country with 14,7 million of unemployed people, people coaching other people to 'slave' themselves to work in umproper hours and small salaries while there is managers or directors hiring people of the family for spots that there is enable and graduated people for that. Add that the rising of light and water bills, food and etc. Things could be worse but things aren't better, and had to listen to my parents say that should be easy to save money but you can't compare the state that country is today from what the country was almost 30 years ago. Oh, I live on Brazil, btw.

Currently suffering through another burnout feeling after a small vacation and also getting COVID (delta, but have two shots). I wish that the feeling would go away but I felt it from the beginning due to working with groceries last year. I was constantly harassed by customers last year due to following the rules of lockdown. My work was close to city hall when the protest and curfew happened. Everything felt stressful and even after I change my job, my stress continued. I felt like I was never doing enough. I had to move to a different type of job and location due to someone micromanaging me and giving me crap for three months. So now I want to run away from the city. Run away to somewhere that it’s not so fast. I’m tired of city life. I’m tired of being slow. I’m just plain old tired of being in loud places, even if people aren’t being loud themselves. But I can’t. I’m with a partner that loves the city and doesn’t see a problem with staying here. That we won’t make the same money. Idk I wish that I was able to make it on my own but I don’t want to take that journey on by myself. So I’m stuck. And I don’t know how to be positive being in this part of my life right now.

Maria Null

Nowadays I just feel depressed and so on the outside that I feel like nothing’s worth my time anymore. The only things that cheer me up are anime, BTS and your audios. Your audios take me out of my own reality and I just travel to a world where I feel loved and safe. So thank you so much for working so hard for us. We truly appreciate it ❤️

vang00gh

Thank you for giving us a place to vent. Time to talk ☺️ Yesterday I came out to my mom as a pansexual with they/them pronouns. She didn’t take it well and told the rest of my family without my knowledge. I live in Tennessee (Bible central) so as you can guess It didn’t go over well. I was also diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I was put on mood stabilizers recently and have felt so much better until yesterday. I couldn’t sleep at all last night and I’m working a fourteen hour shift today. Sleepy is an understatement lol Does anyone have any advice on coping with my family issues? I’d really appreciate it.

UmmHi????

Depression and insomnia have been kicking my ass for the past week and im planning on having a screening for ocd in september:/// generally my mental health has been very bad lately and i feel extremely lonely and isolated from everything bc of my anxiety. But on a positive side note ive been going out with a really nice girl i met at a cafe and i think things between us are going pretty well :3

(Ngl I was so scared to post this T~T )

I hate my job... it's gotten me depressed because it's taking all my time by giving me overtime hours, which keeps me away from what I want to do, let alone try to relax. Cause of this, I've been getting more and more angry cause it's really getting under my skin with how people operate on their own when we need to work as a unit. From that, my attitude has been changing dramatically and it's not good at all... I need to find healthy outlets and situations to this or else I'll be out of a job just under 2 months from starting with this company... any help is appreciated.

PoisonIvy

Thank you for the important work you do for the community. I know they can't always express it, but I know the people you work with and their families appreciate what you do! Remember that you are such an important part of the world ,because there is such a great need for people in your position who do their jobs with care!

Hello to all! I just want to wish everyone a great day and better days to come! Life sucks sometimes (especially rght now for me) and it can bring you down, but know that there are people that care for you and that you are loved! Especially by CECE and the rest of this community! Hope that whatever your going through gets better and better by the days that go by! “One shall never give up, for thou has the future ahead! And thy future will be as bright as Midoriya’s smile. As the saying goes… GO BEYOND, PLUS ULTRA!” -D16

I'm generally the happiest I've ever been in my entire life, but the only friends I have that I can hang out have crossed some boundaries and now its uncomfortable and emotionally draining to spend time with them. Anyone else I want to hang with are nowhere nearby. And most of the time I feel like, while there are people I would consider my best friend, I'm never theirs.

Diana

I enjoy the storyline they highlight another side to the characters and show there's more to them and I like that it makes me smile

ninjakitty118

This community is so amazing and caring. It's very heartwarming to see. However... I feel like I don't belong. I'm too old to be here. This is a space for young ones and at my age I shouldn't be enjoying these. That's why I haven't been active. I'm afraid to be seen as old and creepy. That's never my intention. I don't have any friends so I don't know how to act my age. I will always continue to support CeCe because if I can't be happy and living my best life, I can at least contribute to someone who is.

Sahaine

I've been working on my creative career for years now and I'm starting to get a bit demotivated as I keep trying patreon and advertising it but not getting any patrons... I'm also working on webtoon that is growing at a super slow rate due to me trying to work part time as well as create content. It's all getting a bit... ugh... :/ Thanks for allowing us to vent, Cece

aeons

Take your time to express yourself and to get to know what you feel or want or wish. Rome wasnt build in a day and it's perfectly fine to not know how to do it! Personally speaking, I dont think we ever completely know how to express completely what we think

Skylar

Same for me sis, i feel so understood i think i'm gonna cry 🥺♥️ you have all my support, you're doing amazing sweetheart ♥️♥️

bokuto supremacy

That sounds fun! I love that idea. Lets all get along and support each other! <3

Oppai-Senpai

My sisters kids have been living with us for like 7 years now because she’s a drug addict.. her boyfriend got out of jail after 8 years and now she’s in California with him. She has been since October of 2020.. she doesn’t ask about her kids or anything all she asks for is money for drugs.. and I’m mentally not okay.. at all.. I don’t know why maybe I’m just weak or something..

Josie

I work 40h a weeks with not much more than minimum wage, and I am also a full time student, struggling with depression and an anxiety disorder. I didn't have time for a break between the end of my semester and working because I have bills to pay. Now, I was starting my one week UNPAID vacation and then... BOOM! I have a really bad ear infection for which I've been seen by like 5 doctors, a bunch of meds to take..... all that as my vacation starts, it's also my birthday week and I'm on my period. I've decided the universe just hates me! And because of the infection, I CANT WEAT HEADPHONES, AND SO I VANT LISTEN TO THE AUDIOS 😭😭😭😭😭

Back in January I had gotten out of a almost 9 year relationship. We weren’t technically dating, but we acted like we were, well… I did. He was someone who would leave me on read or not even message me back for weeks at a time. Every time I would lose hope in us, he would somehow pull me back in. Stringing me along so to speak to. It wasn’t a very healthy relationship, let’s just say I was giving more love then what I was capable without getting barely any in return. So much so I manifested a thing I called a ‘shadow person,’ which he helped me sleep but was also taking a lot of my energy to the point I was always sleepy and exhausted. He was someone who’s pride wouldn’t let him view me as a lover, but as a chain keeping him down. He couldn’t handle the brat side I was very well, he blamed me for ‘betraying’ him when I had a crush on someone for three days even if we weren’t dating. He got mad at me for almost getting ***** by someone I didn’t know. He did show compassion when I really needed him, and only came to one very important thing because I begged him (an gaslighted him a bit as he often did to me, I admit it was wrong but I really wanted him to watch. It was a long distance relationship so everything was online.) He never said I love you once, but said a statement which “meant” the same thing. He was always to busy or tired to speak with me. After I while I felt like I didn’t matter. In April of this year, I was drunk because I was texting him (stupid I know, I’ll explain why in a second.) I was probably one of the only people he had left in his life, who could tolerate his ideals and his personality and I don’t want to be the one to make him seem more like the victim. He said he had found someone else already despite never getting with me in a few months after our break up, and that’s what ended it for me… I had lost the heart I had but I am still healing. He contacted me later on in July, this month, and said “You will always return to me if it came down too it.” Which made me feel sick to my stomach. Thankfully thanks to a good friend of mine I did a soulmate reading, and am finally on my witchcraft journey (love ya Rio!) which my deity was very glad I contacted him, tied up loose ends and advised to leave him. An thanks to another friend who is getting married next month (Love ya Momma Rae) she had found my soulmate and I am healing thanks to him. Now. Thanks to Miss Yato’s audios I was able to make it through college, and parts of high school, I felt happy just being told sweet things that I never had and honestly that’s what kept me going too. I know this seems like a huge downer, and doesn’t even begin to scrape the surface of him but, I just feel better knowing that it’s finally over and thanks to Miss Yato I was able to make it through! Love you all so much! ❤️

Cherry Blossom Savvy

This is a great idea!! I like the thought of sharing eachothers troubles...Like a big happy family!! Yagami faaaamm!!! \(^0^)/ <3

Caitlyn

I’ve been up for what….close to five hours now. For no reason. But I guess everyone has bad sleep nights. I’ll just get to bed early tonight instead of my usual time. Anyways remember to rest up and for the love of ihop REMEMBER YOUR WATER

Well right now I’m not feeling anything I’m content but I wanted to hop in to say hi to everyone and I wish a great day upon y’all! I go about my life having times when I want to cry and need to be before I end up having very bad panic attack then I have times when I have so much energy but that can also exhausting so I’m peacefully happy right now 😌

Niiv3

I've been going through some changes and escaping my head with audios and reading has been a blessing. I did figure out that I am Gray-Ace which is nice because now I have a name to put with how I'm feeling. I also am looking for a better job. Right now I'm running a store, doing photoshop and photo editing and being a social media manager making $10 an hour :-/ I only work 37.5 hours a week and its just not enough for me to live on. I have an etsy store but im not making much from it. I have an associates in accounting and an associates in fine art. I dont know why no where around is hiring for accounting work and its stressing me out big time.

Tempting Scarlet

I honestly think it’s easier for me to communicate on here than it is to communicate on the server on Discord. I’m really truly just trying to continue finding myself and learning how to befriend and communicate and socialize with strangers. my anxiety, my trustingness and my social awkwardness is like a crutch that I want to get rid of because I like making new friends but I also don’t want to be involved in drama or the wrong crowd. So I stay in the shadows and I stay low and it’s a safe way for me to go about life but I really do want to connect more and this is the most I’ve talked on here on Patreon. So that’s why I can really relate with CECE and everyone else like me and CECE because we both fear strangers and society ✌🏾 👌🏾

Crystal Jubilee

Reminder to everyone struggling with feeling lazy: sometimes paralysis is your body/mind's way of telling you that you need REST (you're doing the best you can right now, so be kind to yourself!)

Willow

Nothings wrong with you, some things just take a lot of time! I'm 23 and still didn't have a boy-/girlfriend - just do what you enjoy and love, and the other things will come to you naturally 😉

I started to listen to asmr’s because I’m a workaholic. I like sleeping, but I had a problem making myself stop working to go to bed. It’s toxic being a workaholic cause it’s so normalized. But I know it’s not ok to eat only one meal a day or literally hold my bladder for hours just so I can get this idea on “word” first. A 14 hour day is not normal. But when one job pays your bills and the other pays your soul where the frick do I down size?

Aris

I've started losing weight since the end of 2018 and I've lost 65kg so far. I still have a looong way to go to be healthy again. But i've reached a point were i've started to gain weight again. I can lose said gained weight again but i'll gain it back like 3 days later and it's so infuriating and makes me wonder why I keep trying. 😔 But there's where my stubborness comes in handy. I refuse to let myself give up completely and that's one the few things i'm proud off. ☺ I've also lost the love of my life and fiancee in 2015 and I can finally proudly say i've successfully moved on and i'm slowly letting people in again and so far, besides my shy introverted ass freaking out everytime, it's kinda nice having social interactions again! But boi o boi I did I not miss the stupidity and rudeness of some people 😂 Uuhm something else 'bout ol me. I'm a huuuge Hawks simp and i'm a bratty sub... Uuhm i'm pretty kinky too used to have a dom that was fun and my favorite flowers are orchids! 😏😂 Never give up and keep on fighting! - Love, Meddy ♥

Meddy

I work in a senior care facility for a while now. Its been pretty decent, even with the world situation right now. More recently I've been working long 8 hour shifts at work. Dont get me wrong, 8 hours isnt too much to do, but in the past few months the staffing situation is horrible. On the worst days, dealing with 25 residents to feed both lunch and breakfast, changing, dressing, toileting andcleaning is a lot to handle. And to do it all in 8 hours barely even leaves room for any form of documentation of the care done. Im just so physically and mentally exhausted and it doesn't seem like it gets any better.

Paige M

I wish I could give more to Cece but I can barely afford $10 but I have absolutely no regrets paying for it! It’s the best $10 I can spend! And she’s worth so much more and I feel guilty I can’t give more. I’m having such a difficult time getting a job and I can’t do as much as I use too since I really screwed up my knee and have permanent damage to it. And my mental illnesses also hold me back from certain jobs . I dropped out of high school because I was being bullied so bad I was considering suicide, and no one was helping me with it at all. I suffer with PTSD because of my childhood, and I have episodes of memories that cause mental breakdowns at random times and I have no control over them. These audios have helped me take my mind off all the horrible things I’ve suffered and what I want to do to get away from it. Wow this is a long post sorry. ^^;

ZestyRexy

I have always wanted to create a comic/web toon or something similar since I was like 14 but I always had this constant fear that it’s gonna get a bunch of hate and be consistently criticized and judged. Having being in such a nice and comforting community is a really wonderful and heart warming comfort ❤️ I’m really grateful to have this community be like a family

This is a great idea. It's like reminding each other we're all strong. I just wanna let you Cece and everyone in this community you're all loved and appreciated by me. I know I'm not that interactive in the discord but when I do talk to people it's always so lovely and nice. I love how strong this community stands against hate. It sometimes can be a tough battle but we'll always push through. I wanna remind everyone you're loved you're appreciated and if anyone and you Cece ever wanna have someone to talk about anything. I'm a great listener and will try my best to be there and give advice. I love you all! ❤❤❤❤❤❤

☆•RedRiot•☆

oh man, after a really bad ex who judged my body, I've reached a month with my current boyfriend who loves all of me. he compliments me all the time and he tells me he loves my tummy and finds me sexy and adorable. I couldn't help but cry last night from just how amazing he is. to anyone who thinks they won't find someone, that someone is definitely out there. you're worthy of love!

Nemo Tode

I'm so happy to meet all of you!! 😊 I've been feeling so lonely lately since I broke up with my abusive boyfriend, not enough that I would go back to him, but enough that it hurts. I miss meeting new people since covid started. I love this community so so much!!! Thank you all for being the best and so supportive!

Willow

I'm currently in a studying-loop (because it has to be this time of semester) and balancing it off with my time spent here and on The Arcana ✨

I feel you tbh, I was so happy when I had my 2 weeks vacation and now it's my first day back at work and I just wanna go home again. I hope you'll get better soon again :(

I have a fear of making friends due to people treating me like a doormat I have very low self-esteem so I just deal with things on my own gaming and all too

Mako Dazai

That sounds like an amazing idea. 💜

Have u thought about transferring?

NuggetQueen

My name is Anna and I'm 19. And I never had a gf/bf. I'm starting to give up....because in these days...those 14 yo girls, boys lost their virginity, had more than one relationship and than theres me.....almost 20 (in september) yo woman who never even held hands with someone. Whats wrong with me? Why no one wants to hug me or hold my hand? What is so wrong with me?

AValentiny

I struggle daily with the loss of my grandma but your comfort audios, specifically Kirishima, helps me more than you'll ever know. Lots of love Cece and I really care for you. Sending virtual hugs🥰

Ness

ooof i haven’t been on pat in a minute but hi y’all 💜💜 i really wanna do art as a career but idk how to start or where to gooooooooo i hope y’all are doing okay ✨✨

delicate_flower

I wish I could draw. So when I see the works on insta, tik tok and Twitter I try my best show love!!!

I feel like this is the one community where people actual care and don’t judge you. I love cece and her audios as they have helped me in many ways through her comfort and nsfw audios which I love. Hope y’all have blessed and happy day I’ve been writing since I was 12 and I have at least two novels I’m working on buuuuuuuuut my self confidence is trash pfffff

krusty.sloth

Anyone who reads this, you are all amazing and keep kicking ass. Dont be afraid of making mistakes, thats how you become better and dont be so hard on yourself. Give yourself a pat on the back. Tell yourself you are doing good. Dont worry about others opinions where it then takes a toll on your life. You'll always have people who like you and who dont like you. It could be for something random and little or just something that doesnt even make sense. So what I mean is, dont let them make the choices for you. Theyre not you. Its your happiness I send everyone virtual hugs!! ❤❤

^¬.¬^

"In the process of growth, the oak is not better than the acorn." - Alan watts 💕

Willow

One not-so-big thing: I didn't eat before I took my iron pill(I have low hemoglobin) so now I feel like puking. One kinda big thing: I've been having problems with figuring my own sexuality out. A friend thinks I may be asexual, but I don't feel like it's the right term for what I explained to them.

Raphy Hubcap

My Sub Bakugo x Dom Fem OC “Take Me” was inspired by Yagami Yato too! I’m currently 20 chapters in. What is your book name? :3

S3NPAI

i wasnt confident enough in myself to apply for a really famous university in my country so i settled for the less good one and i just found out that i could've actually gotten into the famous one wheN I SAY IM MAD DUDE,,, YALL BELIEVE IN URSELF PLEASE BECAUSE U MIGHT MISS A BIG CHANCE LIKE I DID

Lucy_Hunter

I hate my job so much.... but it's the one thing that gets me out of bed. My depression is so bad of late. I relisten to so many of the comfort audios because they make me smile. The work that Cece does helps it such a unique way.

All the love to you Cece and of course for everyone reading it <3

Brixton Fawkes

I dont really know how to express my self or say how I'm feeling so I don't know how to properly thank you but your work is amazing and has helped me more than you can imagin. So thank you from the bottom of my heart 🖤 ps. Make sure you take care of yourself 🖤🖤

Fenix Rose

I have been struggling to gain motivation with my art and fics lately because of the increase of crotch goblins throwing tantrums. I feel like all my creativity is being ripped from me and I’ve been depressed the last few days. Does anyone have ocs they’ve made? I have too many and I’d love to see other peoples creations. It always makes me feel a bit better seeing everyone’s creative touch on art / fics.

S3NPAI

I really hope everyone is having an amazing day! If not, I hope it gets better for you! I want to remind y'all that you are loved by someone. You are the reason for someone's happiness and I'm grateful for all of you

I’m like super bad at these but Hi I’m alexes! I’m super passionate about anime and manga and I’ve been collecting manga for about 6 years now. This community is awesome and I love interacting with everyone here. Thanks for bringing everyone together cece! Love you all and have a fantastic day! I wanna know more about everyone in the community too so feel free to share more about you 🤗

Hehe well thank you. I try to treat everyone with kindness and usually try to look for a reason , ANY reason to call someone nice. I've had problems with a girl at work for a while but we are finally on speaking terms and can communicate properly. Just goes to show that in time, change, weather it's good or bad, will indeed happen. Remember to always stay positive and try to listen to more than your side of the story. Please have a great day

Mai Nara

I love this community so much. 💗 truth be told, cece has helped me multiple times with her audios, i suffer from anxiety and depression and sometimes the world is too much to handle. I'm grateful for the audios she continues to make, as they help me through my day-to-day. I'm just grateful to have the opportunity to listen to your work, and you will always have my continued support! Thank you Cece for your talent and time 💜

ItzExplosive

I just wanna say that I’m proud of myself for reaching another follow goal on tiktok but I’m so proud of all of you for being around today! And if you’re reading this, you’re awake and alive and that’s so awesome! I love you and drink your water 💖

A great idea and whoever reads this just know that as long as you're giving something your all that's the main thing, even if you don't hit where you want to right away learn from it, where to improve and what to keep doing and you'll get where you want to be :)

FantasyWeaver

That’s the same for me. I can’t say how many hours I’ve spent healing myself listening to her comfort audios. It’s like remembering to feel again

I’ll hold everyone’s hands❤️

Nyx shadow

Go for it! You'll find people who will love it!

^¬.¬^

To anyone who thinks they're not worthy of love: "But how can you love a person who is not whole? Because you, like the moon, are not only beautiful when full, in all of your fractions and phases and ivory white pieces, I love you." - Beau Taplin, Moon Phases

Alley_Cat

Cece inspired to publish my own writings! I am shy and not confident in my abilities at all I decided to be brave and I publish my book.. Currently 11 chapters in and it's been well received and people have been lovely. Honestly this community has literally saved me from dark depression and loneliness. ❤️

Neko

Anyone else find themselves stressing to the point where they seem to shut down and everything goes numb for awhile? That’s why Cece’s work is so special to me, the comfort takes the numbness away, even if it’s only for an hour. I seriously couldn’t thank her enough which is why I’m so glad she has a Patreon. $25 a month seems small but it’s better than nothing.

Kayla

I just want to say I’m proud of all of you no matter what your situation is. Everyone needs to have someone that is proud, I’ll be that for you all❤️

Scarlet

This could be a great idea. It's sometimes easier to vent to strangers on the net, than to the people around you.

Eldritch

I really want to release a novel but I'm not confident enough to 🥺

Lightbullet4711

I… have been trying to find a job for so long, and it’s been hard. Studios don’t want me for some reason and it hurts. Zines have denied me too, and I look at my art with disappointment. I may not always visit the Patreon, or be active in the discord, but I appreciate being a part of this community.

LizzieShiro

Group hug!!!! 😍

Neko