Felka, the Woman Who Writes Her Desire Into Existence (day 2 of 24 days of Felka)

Today I want to share something tender, something wildly personal: my manifesto for these 24 days. My mission is simple but brave—to love myself loudly, to celebrate the holidays in ways that honor me, and to stop performing softness or smallness for anyone else’s comfort.

In the photo I’m sharing, you’ll see my actual handwriting... my imperfect little chicken scratches, as my mom used to teasingly call them, 🥰 spelling out the heart of this project:

A woman is most beautiful when she knows exactly what she wants.
When she follows the desire that sets her soul on fire.
This winter, I choose to let my fire grow brighter.

Writing that by hand felt like lighting a match inside myself.

Because writing, especially handwriting, has always been my first love.
Growing up in Poland, we learned cursive the old-school way, looping each letter slowly, carefully, rhythmically. I fell in love with the sound of writing: the scratch of the pen, the tug of the paper, the way each word felt like a small spell I was casting. Even now, when I write by hand, I pay attention in a way nothing else demands of me. It’s how I learned to notice people. To feel them. To love them.

And honestly… I’ve spent years waiting to meet my worthy opponent!! Someone who can write me back with the same devotion, the same flair, the same ridiculous level of romantic detail. I’ve tried! But no one has out-handwritten me yet. No one has matched my penpal freeeak. 😏

If I ever write you a letter, you’ll know exactly what I mean. You’ll receive:

1. A handwritten letter that goes TOO deep, because I don’t know how to be shallow...

2. Updates on my life, and (of course) a dangerously honest first impression of you (and why I found you cool the MOMENT we met).

3. Some tea I think you’d love.

4. Stickers of forest animals. Obviously???

5. A tiny drawing I made of you once when we were at a café killing time. You didn’t think I kept it, but I did. :)

For years I used to shrink myself, embarrassed by how “extra” I was. How checked-out people looked when they realized how much love I poured into every envelope. But the older I get, the more I realize: at my core, I’m a lover, a dreamer, and a comedian. A little feral about affection. A little dramatic about ink.

Nobody has matched my freak yet—but one day, I hope someone will. Someone who falls in love with my weird handwriting the way I have. Honestly, at this point, it’s a requirement.

And so I end today with an affirmation—for me, and for you:

Today, I fully honor how deep I am. I refuse to make myself smaller for anyone.

Here’s to 24 days of expanding, not shrinking.
Here’s to letting our fires grow brighter.

love you, mean it!!

felka felka felka