Fixing Android 18(part 1)

Illustration by Thunder Emperor

story written by Goose

hope u guys enjoy it. there also zip file that you guys can download,

its include the illustration and the story

Fixing Android 18

I came back home, tired after a long day. All I wanted was to relax and don’t think about anything important during the rest of the day. I also wanted to finally have dinner today, my wife said she was making Chinese buffet, my absolute favorite.

Now, about my wife. Her name is 18, Android 18 to be precise. She used to be one of those creepy killer androids of the Red Ribbon, but then it turned out she’s actually pretty cool and now we’re married. Of course, having an android as your wife comes with its perks. We recently had a clash with some guy who wanted to destroy earth and all of that. It was a disaster, but luckily it all came out alright. All of our losses and big damages were reverted with the Dragon Balls, so it’s as if nothing happened…

Or at least that’s how it is for everybody else. Ever since that event, 18’s been having issues. She’s been forgetting stuff, talking and moving weird… like… a robot… I-I mean, she is one, but what I’m trying to say is that she’s acting more “robotic” than usual if that makes sense to you.

“I’m home!” I say as I enter through the door. “Oh, Krillin, hi! How was your day today?” 18 asked in an unusually happy tone, but tbh, I doubt “unusual” is a valid term in this house anymore.

“Um… good, it was good. How about you? How was your day?” I said, trying to be polite. She just stared at me in complete silence, bowing down with a blank smile. I just stared back at her in silence, looking directly at her beautiful blue eyes. This awkward silence lasted for a couple seconds, until I asked. “18?...” Her eyes blinked and she stood straight.

“What?” She said putting her hand on her forehead, spoken in a mechanical voice. She turned to see me staring at her. “Ah, you’re home.” She said now in her usual cold tone.

“Y-yeah… I just asked you how your day was.” I nervously replied.

“Ah. Eh, it was ok, nothing too special.” 18 Told me.

She said she would start making dinner now. She headed to the kitchen, and I just waited on the table to keep an eye on her. I turned on the tv to entertain myself while 18 was busy. I could hear her chopping chicken in the background while I watched Mr. Satan on television just being the usual doofus he is. It was entertaining, maybe a bit too much. I didn’t realize 10 minutes had passed and 18 was STILL chopping chicken. I went to the kitchen and there she was, moving the knife up and down as if she were cutting chicken, but she wasn’t cutting anything, she just moved the knife up and down, tapping the cutting board with the blade. I carefully approached her with a tap on the shoulder, immediately, she stopped cutting and stood still, completely in silence. She then turned around surprised. I flinched because she was still holding the knife. “Ah, you’re home.” She said.

“Yes, I am. You were making dinner, but I guess you… got stuck cutting the chicken.” I told her. She took a few seconds to reply, but not as long as before.

She made a confused face and said “What?”

“I don’t know anymore.” I replied.

She turned around and went back to the cutting board. “Ok then. I guess I’ll keep cooking.” She started walking, but I stopped her by taking her by the hand. I realized that if I let this keep going, it would either be a huge mess or the dinner would NEVER be made, so I very carefully took the knife off her hands and said.

“It might not be a good idea today, I’ll order a pizza.” Once again, she didn’t reply. I just took her by the hand and started walking towards the living room. However, her legs stopped. Whirring motors could be heard, so I just carried her, I could feel her legs vibrating.

I got to the living room and sat her down on the couch. She reacted with a blink and I backed off. 18 noticed what was on the tv. “Is that… Mr. Satan?”

“It is.” I said.

“What is that clown doing on the tv!?” She asked in shock.

“They gave him a show where he teaches martial arts or something.” I explained.

“Wait, he wasn’t joking!?” She exclaimed even more shocked now.

“Apparently not.” I laughed. I sat on the table to wait for the pizza and watched the tv. Suddenly, 18 stood up upset. “Holy crap, you’re back!” She yelled.

“I thought we were already past that!” I exclaimed.

“Past what? I need to get cooking, I haven’t started, you must be starving!” She said. She started walking back to the kitchen, so I stopped her. “Actually! You weren’t feeling well, so I ordered a pizza. It should be here in a few minutes.”

18 was silent again. After a few seconds she said “Feel bad? I’m feeling good, but ok, have your pizza I guess.” a bit pissed. She then headed to the couch and noticed the tv. “Is that Mr. Satan on the television?” She asked surprised.

“Yes, they gave him a show and no, he wasn’t kidding when he said they’d give him one.” I said frustrated.

“And what’s the frown for?” She asked. Then, her body jerked a bit and her eyes twitched, and in a mechanical voice, she said “Krillin, you’re here!”

“Yes, 18, it’s me, Krillin, I’m home.” I said exhausted.

“You must be-” “No, you won’t cook today!” I interrupted

“W-why?” She asked with the same mechanical voice.

“You weren’t feeling well, so you weren’t able to cook and I decided to order a pizza instead.” I explained.

18’s eye started twitching, she tilted her head to the side and said “I… I… (*click) I don’t remember.”

“That’s what I mean when I say you’re not feeling well. Lately you’ve been forgetting stuff, giving me answers ages after I ask questions and moving weird. But today it’s been especially bad.” I told her.

She looked at me, her eye twitched and she blushed intensely. She opened her mouth and said “I… Ah-I-I…” Smoke started coming out of her mouth. “S-system overheating, Save files HaVe BeEeEEeeEEEeee… (BEEP) kRiLLin! Y-you’Re Hhhhhhhoooommmmeeee…” and sparks flew from her body. “Mal-malfunction-function, S-sysTEM ErRorrrrRRRR (pop) H-hi! I’m A-aNdROiD EigHTeEn. E-ErRoR (click) (BEEP) S-savE FiLes HaVe BeEn CoRrUpPT-edddd…” The sound of fans whirring showed up becoming louder and louder, and smoke came out of her like a train. Her voice raised in pitch as she said “I-I-I-IIIIIIIIIIIII” And a big loud spark came out of her chest. Her eyes turned a darker shade of blue, the fans slowed down until they completely stopped. She was completely stiff, like a statue. “Um… 18?” I asked worried. 18 just shot smoke out of her mouth, like a dragon breathing fire and fell to the ground, keeping her stiff position.

I panicked, so I carried her to our garage and sat her down on a chair. I took off her shirt and as I saw her turned off body, emotionless face and access panel, I realized something… I don’t know ANYTHING about robots. I doubt he would know any better, but if he always knows how to save the universe from destruction, he will most likely figure something out, so I called my trustworthy friend Goku. Almost immediately, a flash was heard from outside the house and someone knocked on the door. I went to open the door and there was Goku with the pizza I ordered. I let him inside the house and took him to the garage to see 18.

“So… what do you think?” I asked him.

He got closer and started to analyze her. “Hmm… well, you said 18 wasn’t feeling well, so this is the first thing I came up with.” Said Goku as he pulled out a senzu bean and stuffed it into 18’s mouth.

I sighed in frustration. “That’s… not how it works.” I told him, but surprisingly, 3 beeps were heard. 18’s eyes, albeit a bit glitchy, lit up and she said “SysTeM ReBoOtiNg, pLeaSe W-wait-wait.”

“I think that IS how it works.” Said Goku.

18 spat out the bean in disgust. “What is ThiS?” She asked, her voice was still a bit mechanical.

“I think it’s not.” I said, I went to my wife and talked to her. “18! What happened? Are you alright?” I asked.

“I-I don’t know! The LaSsT ThiNg i R-remember was… was…” Then, her eyes started blinking and glitching again, and her head turned to the left. I tried to stop her.

“It’s ok, you don’t need to remember!” I interrupted. She stopped blinking, staying completely still. She turned her head to me, the sound of motors could be heard, she took a few seconds to speak, but said “O-oh mAn, Ah-I feel like ShiT. Krillin, can you fi-Fi-FfFFffiX me, pLease?” She asked.

“Sure, 18, that’s why I brought Goku, he’s here to help us.” I explained. 18 turned to see him, Goku waved hello. 18 opened her mouth, but said nothing, her arm moved up and she remained completely immobile.

“So… how do we fix her?” I asked.

Goku scratched his chin and thought, he came up with an idea. “She has a little door on her body, maybe we could check in to see what’s up.” He suggested.

“That might be a good idea.” I said, I warned 18 as we slowly approached her. “18! We’re going to open your panel… please don’t hurt us.”

18 remained unresponsive, as immobile as a statue. I hoped for the best. I touched her panel. 18 suddenly reacted again “(BEEP BEEP BEEP) wAr-Ning. ActiviTy in Front panel de-detected-tected.”

I just decided to be brave and open it.

The instant we opened it, a cloud of smoke came out of her, making us cough and back off as she robotically said “FRONT PANEL OPEN.” “W-wow, that came out of- (click) came out of me?” She asked in a glitchy voice.

“It sure did.” I said. We looked at her circuitry, it was all scratched, dusty and rusty.

“Wow, that battle really made an impact on you.” Commented Goku. 18 looked at him, remained silent with a face like this D:,’ for a few seconds, and then, without moving her mouth, she said “A-ah, Goku. YoU’rE hERe.”

We just ignored her and kept working. We looked at her circuits not really knowing what anything is.

“What do we do first?” I asked nervously.

“Well, I don’t know what you think, but her fuel tanker could be blocking our view from the bigger picture.” He said referring to a little can filled with some liquid on her circuits. “Maybe we should take it off for a while and see what happens.” He suggested.

I decided to listen to him, so I grabbed a screwdriver and carefully took off one of the screws that held it. As it came off, her body rocked back and forth as she said “Warning! CoOLanT CaNisTer Un-” but then, the can tilted to the side, pouring the liquid all over her circuits, which didn’t do her well as she started malfunctioning again.

“Un-Un-Un (pop) W-WaRning-wARn-AGHHHHHHHHH (pop) (BEEP) MaLfuNction-MaL-MalFUNcTiOn-funCtioN” Her head twitched to the side, her mouth moved a little, the sound of whirring fans became louder and smoke and sparks came out of her as she kept going. “War-NinG. (click) FLuiD deTectEd in Sy-sY-syStEmS. (BEEP) H-Hi! I’m EiGhT-A-aNdRoiD EiGhTeeN-tEEn (pop) (click) K-KriLLin, You’Re HoMe! YOu muSt Be StaRRRrrrrrrrr (pop) W-WARNING-WARNING! CriT-Tic-CaL Damage SUS-SUSTAINED. UNIT IN URGENT NEED OF

RePaiRrRrrrRrrrrRRRR...” and her body rocked back and forth until she ended up laying down on the chair.

“Well, this is a disaster.” I said, 18 stopped moving so everything was more calm now. The liquid spilling all over her circuits gave me an idea. I told Goku to hand me a duster and I attempted to clean off the dust and rust inside of her. I was being VERY careful to not touch anything I shouldn’t. Why you ask? Well, 18 wasn’t really shut down. Her head twitched every few seconds and her eyes crossed in different directions as a very faint “aaaa” could be heard from her voice box when you got close and her circuits were still a bit sparky. I tried to be as careful as possible, but suddenly, the duster got trapped between a cable, so I tried moving it, only to find out it was tangled to a bigger bunch of cables. I tried to remove it, but when it looked like I would finally be able to get it out, I accidentally pulled out not just the duster, but also all those cables, which were attached to some sort of chip thingy.

A big spark popped out of that gap. 18 stood up and the electricity hit me, making me crash against the ground. 18 started moving again, malfunctioning as intensely as before. “E-ERROR InterNal Sy-Sy-SySSSSSSSSS…” She started walking but her legs got stuck again, like when she was walking out of the kitchen. She didn’t move forward, but you could hear the crackling and whirring of motors trying to move. She kept talking in this weird distorted mechanical voice. “H-Hello, I’m (pop) MaLFunCtion-MaLfuNcCCcccc. W-WaRNing, InteRnaL Sy-sySteMs have BeEn Da-a-AAAaaaAAA (click click click) (BEEP) K-KriLLin! YoU mUst Be-” Another spark popped from her, she took one step. “He-Hello-Hello, I’m-Hello.” She sparked again as she took another step and stopped. Her body twitched as the motors’ whirrs became louder and louder, her left eye closed and said “YoU mUst Be StarVinG-StaR-StaRRRRViiiii (click)” She turned her head to the left and said. “WarNing. IntErNAL Sys-Sys-Sysssss.” She sparked again as she kept walking.

She walked up to the wall and kept walking like a videogame character. She said “InteRnaL SyStEms Dam- (pop) -Mage. I’m AnDroid EiGhTe-EE-eee-EEEEEnnnnn (BEEP) ReBoOtiNg SyStEm-ReBoo-Oo-AAAAAAH- (pop) (BEEP BEEP) W-waRninG cRiTicaL daMagE SUsTaiNed (click) U-uNit in UrGent NeEd

Of-Of-oOOOOOFFFFFFFFFFF” The sound of fans whirring became louder, her legs stopped moving and started vibrating again. Smoke came out of her mouth and with a loud spark, her leg made a brief movement, but stopped Was 18 fell to the ground.

“(BEEP BEEP BEEP) W-wArning-WarNing.” She said as she turned her head to the left. “CriTicAL dAmaGe Sus-SuStAiNe-e--eeeeeed.” She sparked again, she turned her head to the right, then to the left again and then she faced front as her eyes blinked and crossed, one of them had completely lit off. She tilted her head to the side and said “UniT in UrGent NeEd of Re-Re-ReeeEEEE…” She then beeped again 3 times. She remained completely silent as her right eye kept blinking. She then acted as if she returned to normal, though obviously she was still very broken. She looked at her inner circuits and said. “D-damn. -That-That-That Malfunction-Mal-Malfunction (click click click) (BEEP) That came out of- mE?” 18 slowly moved her arm towards her circuitry, the mechanical whirr being heard as she moved. Her circuits were still sparking so the expected happened for the worse.

The sparks touched her finger, which electrocuted her. She malfunctioned even worse than before. Her body jerked strongly sparks and smoke came out of her whole body and her legs vibrated again as she said “S-System ERRRRRRRRR (pop) H-hello-HeLLo, I’m AndRoiD eIGH-Eigh-EigHHHHHHH (pop) (click)

AHGHVFGCGHGGDASKRFTEUYBRWESKGTYRSZDK (click click) (pop) (BEEP) (click)

W-WarNing-EiGhtEEn-WarNing. CriTiCaL daM-dAMaGe (pop) Malfunction… Malfunction… MaL-Mal (BEEP) ERROR- cRitiCaL dAmaGe De-de-dEEee (pop) (whirrrrr) Initiating emErgeNcy Shu-Shu-ShuTdOwwwwwww...” A loud spark emitted from her body as it twitched, letting the whirr of the motors be heard once more. She let out a final “a.” As her eyes lit off, the sound of the fans came to a halt and she shut down.

“Oh this is bad, Goku, really bad. What do we do?” I worried.

“Don’t worry, Krillin. Maybe… maybe we could call Bulma so she helps us find the Dragon Balls so we can wish- no, wait!” He interrupted himself.

“Bulma!” We both realized.

“Yeah! She’s fixed machines for us before! That could help! You take 18, I’ll take all the pieces that may have fallen off of her and let’s go to Bulma’s house.” I said. And that’s exactly what we did. We hopped on my car, we layed 18 and all of her pieces on the back seats and drove off.

Fixing android 18