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MarvinKnight
MarvinKnight

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Amazon Apocalypse 4: Chapter 65

After the match, Ivanar and Agatha both eyed Myrina like she was a venomous snake. They’d known she was good from what they’d seen of her in the arena, but this was the first time she’d really shown off her full capabilities.

I just hoped most of the audience thought the spellblades she’d just defeated were comically bad. If they started rating our team too highly, it would ruin our odds in the betting pool and ruin our plan to keep funding Doomblade’s Armory in the face of ongoing losses.

“I’m going to go check in on Dannar. Figure out why he didn’t show up.” Ivanar shot one last nervous glance at Myrina before he departed, and Agatha followed not long after.

We left the arena grounds and made our way back to the armory since that was our only match for the day. Along the way, we changed out of our disguises and met back up with Sakura. This time, she was the one wearing power armor while we were in our civilian garb.

“That was amazing, both of you!” Sakura bounced up and down in delight. In power armor, the simple giddy motion took her clean off the ground and back down again.

“Did you make enough to keep our doors open?” I asked.

Sakura nodded. “Yes. I can buy out the building contract and keep getting products in. We can also cover Team Seraphim’s pay too, and still have some to spare to bet on your next win!”

I grinned. “Then it seems like our problems are mostly taken care of. All Myrina and I have to do is win the last of the team matches, then finally make it into the tournament's main event.”

When we arrived at Doomblade’s Armory again, the angry mob was gone, much to my satisfaction.

“What’s that sign on the door?” Myrina pointed.

Sakura frowned as she walked up to the door. There was a large wooden beam nailed across the front doors, making it them impossible to open. On that beam, there was a note. Sakura read it aloud.

“On notice from the Department of Enchanted Equipment Vendors Oversight Committee of Mucaria, this shop is to be closed immediately for not filing four C-11A-B in response to an inquiry posted for your attention in the Office of Merchant Affairs.”

Sakura scowled at the sheet of paper as she held it. She clearly wanted to tear it apart, but in the end settled for folding it in two.

“Red tape. Every businesswoman’s greatest nightmare.”

“Can we get it fixed? It sounds like all we need to do is find this Office of Merchant Affairs,” I replied hopefully.

But Sakura was already shaking her head. “If this was strictly a matter of missing some paperwork, they wouldn’t have been so quick to shut our doors. Normally, even the most stringent bureaucrats start with a warning. This sort of thing doesn’t happen unless another business has a problem with you.”

Now, Myrina was scowling too. “You’re saying this is the work of our enemies?”

“I suspect so.”

I grimaced as well, but the first thing I did was help Sakura tear off the board blocking the entrance to our shop. Inside, we met up with Larin and the rest of Team Seraphim, who told us what happened from their point of view.

“Some shady-looking people rolled up claiming to be inspectors from some department we’ve never heard of. They hammered that board over the door and declared that we were breaking the law. They chased all the customers out. I had half a mind to kick their asses for it. Still might, if I see their smug faces again.” Larin threw us an apologetic shrug.

But as we gathered the facts, Myrina’s expression slowly transitioned to a smile.

“Sounds like this calls for... a lawyer!” Myrina grinned wide, fist thrust in the air.

“I agree. I’m not sure how I missed this sort of thing. We’ll have to hire one right away. Let’s go--“

Myrina put her hands on her hips and shook her head.

“No need. You have a perfectly capable lawyer right here!” She thrust a thumb at herself.

Sakura and I shared a glance. Eventually, I was the one to state the obvious.

“Myrina, I mean this in the best possible way, but... er... you’re not exactly certified here in the Mucaria pocket world, right? I assume whatever lawyer stuff you did to get your job was done on Themyscira?”

Myrina nodded. “That’s right. But don’t worry. Amazonian law is universal!”

“I’m not sure that’s true...” Sakura shared a skeptical glance with me.

“Not to worry, Lawyer Myrina is on the job.” Myrina gave both of us a pat on the head. Moments later, she strode off out the door.

Sakura and I exchanged another look. This one was considerably more nervous.

“We’d better go looking for a lawyer,” Sakura said.

“Agreed.”

If our enemies were lucky, we'd fix the problem before Myrina did.

***

Sakura and I took a trip through town and found what passed for a lawyer. He took out a pair of spectacles and stared at the paper Sakura presented to him.

He spent a minute reading through the entire thing before setting the paper down.

“I have good news for you. There is no Department of Enchanted Equipment Vendors Oversight Committee. The seal on the top means nothing. You can safely discard the notice and continue operations as normal,” the lawyer said.

“Really? We were just scammed?” Sakura blinked in surprise. “I suppose I should have seen that coming.”

“No need to be embarrassed. A lot of shops pull similar tricks on merchants new to town. It’s technically illegal, but if you don’t have proof against whoever posted it, there’s no point pursuing the matter.”

“Thank you for your time.” I stood, relief on my face. What I thought was going to turn into a massive problem ended up being rather easy to solve.

“Glad I could be of service. That’ll be two thousand contribution points.”

Sakura wheezed at the price. In the end, we paid him though, and soon we were back at the shop and opening doors again. We told Larin what happened, and that it had been a trick.

“If I ever see any of those goons again, I’ll point them out to you. Maybe grab them too while I’m at it,” Larin promised.

I looked around the room for Myrina. “Myrina, it’s okay! We don’t need your lawyer skills anymore. It was all fake to trick us into closing our doors.”

There was silence all around us. I shrugged my shoulders. If she wasn’t here, she was probably somewhere out in town. Hopefully, she wouldn’t get in too much trouble. Myrina could be a handful.

Any of my other ladies I would have worried about, but Myrina was a walking calamity. She could do a lot more than hold her own in a fight, and If someone tried to kidnap her, they’d pay the price for so grossly overestimating their abilities. Rather than a ransom, they'd probably pay me to take her back.

With the big problems for the day taken care of, I went back to work. I briefly considered suiting up and trying to join Ivanar in looking for our archer, Dannar, and figuring out why he hadn’t made it to the match. In the end, decided he could handle it. The Minotaur and the archer were friends. Doomblade, not so much. I’d let them handle it.

I decided to pop open my Doomblade armor and get some more work on it. I made new sets of outer defensive plates, each tuned for different kinds of opponents. Now that the team matches were coming to an end, it was more important than ever that I have fine-tuned armor specialized in mitigating attacks from strong opponents.

In addition to the general-purpose swappable defensive plates, I made something that would work well against kinetic damage from pure warriors and something more focused on dissipating hostile fire-aspect magic. While there were certainly other elements worth worrying about, fire was usually the most deadly type of basic offensive magic, barring more exotic elements like void mana. Fire mana also seemed to be a favorite for mages of the Dragon Lodge, since they had the whole dragon theme going on.

It would have been nice to be able to swap between different outer defensive plates mid-fight, but with my current design, it just wasn’t possible. I’d just have to activate the Multipurpose Glyph containing the right armor for the enemy I was facing before the match began.

Besides the fire mana armor, I also made one for water and sunlight, since those were the two other aspects I’d seen. If I was wearing the right armor for any given opponent, the effectiveness of my suit’s defenses would practically double.

I also worked on my sword a bit. Until now, I’d mostly just been punching my opponents. But now that the audience had seen how impressive a swordswoman Myrina was, I didn’t want to embarrass myself by comparison.

While I was a decent swordsman, I didn’t have Myrina’s raw talent for fighting. In fact, I couldn't really use any of my abilities while acting as Doomblade. I’d need to fill in the gaps in my arsenal with copious quantities of high-quality magical equipment. So that was exactly what I went to work on.

A few runes of repulsion here. A bit of attraction there. Some fire along the length. Some kinetic phantom blade near the tip.

While all these modifications might not do much for my technique, they’d make fighting me damn hard. My sword wouldn’t behave the way my enemies expected, but I’d be familiar with its tricks. The result would hopefully throw my opponents off balance long enough for me to claim the upper hand, even against a technically superior fighter, such as, for example, a well-trained Amazonian matriarch.

I was still working on my armor when the shop closed for the day. Normally, I wouldn’t have paid shutting our doors any mind, but shortly after Sakura flipped the sign, I heard an excited rapping on the door.

My gut gnawed at me to put my work down and investigate, and my bloodline rarely let me down, so I obliged. I rounded the corner to find Sakura confronted by a small army of merchants, Mister Mutton the Merchant among them. He was the merchant who’d tried to pawn off suboptimal goods on us, and the only thing that stopped him was some careful contract writing by Sakura.

“Mister Mutton? I don’t remember placing any orders with you,” Sakura began. I vaguely remember her mentioning to me that she wouldn’t be doing any more business with the duplicitous merchant thanks to the trick he tried to pull, so seeing him at our doorstep was odd.

“I’m not here to trade, young lady. I’m here as a representative of the Department of Enchanted Equipment Vendors Oversight Committee,” Mister Mutton smiled widely.

Sakura flashed a tight-lipped smile at him. “Mister Mutton, surely you jest. Such a department doesn’t exist. I’m sure you know this, but I should remind you that this city is governed by a mage council appointed by the Dragon Lodge. Claiming legal authority without their approval is highly dangerous.”

“On the contrary, young miss. I wouldn’t expect a girl like yourself to know the intricacies of merchant work, but my title is fully legal! You see, my companions and I formed a guild named the Department of Enchanted Equipment Vendors’ Oversight Committee. And I was appointed their representative to deal with a troublesome matter.” Mister Mutton puffed his chest up again, looking very pleased with himself.

“I take it you aren’t here to invite me to your little guild?” Sakura asked.

“I’m afraid not.” Mister Mutton did his best to sound contrite but failed miserably. The forced, sad expression lasted only a moment before becoming a smug smile once more. “Truthfully, I’m here to tell you that you’re in violation of guild laws, and henceforth, no suppliers will provide your shop with supplies or funding. Any ferries bringing goods to your shop from Glacia or other nearby worlds have been notified that if they continue working with you, none of us shall ever hire them again.”

I could sense Sakura’s anger growing. I shared the sentiment. This cabal of merchants was trying to drive us out of business the hard way. Perhaps whoever truly incited the angry mob of protestors in that crowd was somewhere out there right now. Clearly, this was the backup plan if ruining public perception of us didn’t turn out as they hoped.

In the backroom, I paced back and forth, fretting. I’d been a bit too casual with my civilian identity already. Appearing like an average shopkeeper now and again was one thing, but making a move around some thirty well-connected merchants was another entirely.

If I rushed in and waved around my jade token, I figured I could intimidate this band of merchants into dispersing. The Dragon Lodge wasn’t shy about being biased in favor of their students, as I’d so clearly experienced that time I’d gotten arrested alongside Cyra. Unless this group of merchants had the backing of one of the great families in the area, they’d realize any attempts to wield the law against me were futile.

But rushing in to solve the situation now would mean risking throwing my plans for the tournament out the window. And that was tantamount to throwing away my plans for getting Cyra back.

Once more, I realized that if it had just been me here, I would have happily closed the doors of Doomblade’s Armory and called it quits. But not now when Sakura cared so much for what we’d build together.

Screw it. I could defuse the situation without relying on the Dragon Lodge’s power.

I looked at my Doomblade Armor and deactivated maintenance mode. The armor shrank down as most components left for higher spatial dimensions, leaving me with only the eight foot humanoid suit. I put it on with haste and strolled out of the back room. As Doomblade, I spoke and instantly caught the attention of the circle of smug merchants.

“These people seem to be bothering you, miss. Shall I escort them out?” I joined the group with a massive sword on my back and footfalls were heavy enough to shake the building. The group of merchants flinched at my appearance, instantly losing some of their bravado. Many of them took a few steps back, and none were looking as smug.

That was one thing I liked about being Doomblade. The sheer size of this body was instinctively imposing. Merchant types like the men and women before me didn’t fight often enough to override their natural heart-pounding fear at the sight of someone big, strong, and heavily armed.

“Y-you can’t attack us. You don’t dare!” Mister Mutton held up a finger. I was impressed to discover he hadn’t retreated at the sight of me. He was only D-Grade, and even reduced by acting the part of a melee fighter, I could crush him a dozen times over without breaking a sweat. Him glaring at me was like a mouse glaring at a tiger.

“And why not, merchant? All of you are shamelessly colluding to have this place shut down. Anyone with eyes can tell it’s because you don’t like losing business to us. And since you’ve conveniently gathered up all our competition in the city right here... well, if an accident were to occur, it’d be very helpful to us.”

I let out a grim chuckle, and many of the merchants went pale at the naked threat. It was no less a threat than they’d tried to deal with us, though. If they wanted to pick a fight, I was happy to increase the stakes. Merchants like these were often willing to lose a little money, but they’d break the moment they thought they’d lose their lives. I was hoping a few threats would shatter this tenuous alliance, but Mister Mutton’s next words broke those hopes.

“You don’t dare attack us! Each of us are partnered with the Darkbinding family! Anyone in the enchanted armor trade has heard of them. Even a young girly like this one here.” Mister Mutton nodded in Sakura’s direction.

Sakura scowled, but behind my helmet, I was grinning. A name. What’s more, it was one I recognized. Considering they’d already been spying on me, I wasn’t afraid of pissing them off further.

So, I reached forward and grabbed Mister Mutton by his shirt. The move was fast as lightning, and once my armored fingers dug into the fabric of his finely embroidered collar, he didn’t have the slightest chance of escaping.

He grabbed my massive hand, choking as I hoisted him off his feet so he dangled in the air.

“Listen to me here and now, Mister Mutton. Cross me, and the Darkbinding family can’t do anything to save you.”

I tossed Mister Mutton to the ground and took one heavy stomp forward. Many of the merchants were already pale, but that move was enough to cause a few of them to break ranks and flee.

“The same goes for all of you. There’s no lost love between me and the Darkbinding family. Only a fool would trust their name to save their lives. Any fools are welcome to remain here.”

More merchants fled. Mister Mutton picked himself off the ground, dusting off his shirt. He raised his finger in my direction like he was going to say something to me, then thought better of it.

He scurried off as rapidly as his rounded belly would allow. When he was finally clear of me, he raised his fist in one last act of defiance and shook his fist. “You’ll regret this!”

“I think not.” Sakura slammed the doors shut and we stepped back inside. Then she glanced up at me with a smile. “That was a rather impressive display of intimidation.”

Someone clapped behind the two of us, and it wasn’t Sakura or myself. It was followed by an excited rapping on the door, and we both turned to see Myrina standing outside and waving.

Sakura opened the door for her.

“That was great! Nice intimidation work, Ca... uh... Doomblade! You’d make a decent assistant. I wish I’d known you planned on doing some lawyering too! I would have brought you along.” Myrina grinned from ear to ear. She turned, and I realized she was carrying a massive sack over her shoulder. It was twice the size she was, and whatever was inside it was squirming.

“Myrina, we’ve been looking for you. We hired somebody in town. The note we saw was fake. It was just the local merchants trying to intimidate us. Same as what just happened out there.” Sakura jerked her thumb in the direction of the departing merchants.

“Intimidation, forgery, and strategically applied beatings are the tools of any good Amazonian lawyer! I knew that letter was fake from the moment I laid eyes on it. That’s all amateur stuff. This is how a true expert operates!” Myrina heaved the sack over her shoulder and upended its contents onto the floor.

Out of the sack spilled a middle-aged balding gentleman who looked like an older, more refined copy of Mister Mutton. He had both his arms and legs tied behind his back, in addition to a gag and blindfold.

“I knocked a few more heads around and found out it’s the Darkbinding family that’s giving us trouble. So, like any good lawyer, I kidnapped their patriarch!” Myrina placed her hands on her hips, proud as a peacock, as the patriarch of the Darkbinding family squirmed on the ground before her.


<Note>
Whew. Myrina saved us 10 chapters of intrigue and cutthroat merchant politics.

Comments

Hopefully soon. I need to write the blurb still.

Marvin

I am both cringing and laughing with a very, very dumb grin on my face. 🤣

NovaZero

HAZZAH fir Amazonian lawyering saving us 10 chapters of intruige

Corac

Good ol’ Amazonian lawyering.

Drew Phillips

I’m so glad it’s Friday and there is a chapter tomorrow I can’t wait to see the fallout from Myrina shenanigans 😂

Vorsayo

Wait... Is Myrina actually good at this?

WhiteRabbit

Pre order going up soonish? I feel like we're hitting that point in the book where I gotta stop reading patreon chapters so I can binge it all on release.

George

Hope Carter and Myrina get to bash some Darkbinding and Phantomfist heads in the tournament.

ArbabSB

I don’t remember the class on kidnapping for leverage in law school… it would save a lot of time and paperwork though!

Detectivetrap23

Great job, Myrina. This Darkbinding family has opened themselves to all sorts of damaging litigation. Can't wait to see what they do to this cheating prat. Trying to put Carter and Sakura out of business for doing a better job than them, how pathetic.

ArbabSB

I think she just replaced it with a street war.

jmundt33a

Thanks Myrina! And thx for the chappy!

DanteFromTheInferno

Hahaha, loved this chapter had me laughing out loud

Wrathwind


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