Bog Fog & Despondence
Added 2022-08-07 19:51:55 +0000 UTCWow, yesterday I finally shot outside using my full frame camera that I got for myself back in May. If that’s any indication of how exhausted I’ve been during my time off the road in Virginia these past 3 months.
I’m looking forward to being back out in my van, this time indefinitely, but it’s also exhausting to constantly be out in the elements while managing my chronic pain. I got super sick with some digestive issues when I finally landed here earlier this Summer, and it may or may not be related to my other ongoing hypermobility problems, but either way it’s taken a ton out of me and I’ve been primarily sleeping and recovering indoors for the past 10 weeks (while also getting some much needed van repairs and upgrades that I’m super excited about). I didn’t really shoot or go outside during this time because frankly I wasn’t feeling it. After shooting nearly every day I was outside earlier this year, it was a nice reprieve and I’m always glad to give myself permission to honor how I feel and go at my own pace. I am absolutely solar powered, through, and being naked outside is a necessary medicine that sustains me at a core level, so it’s been rough for sure.
So I’m beginning to turn some corners in this body and I finally felt it yesterday. And it was soooo nice to make some time to cross this bridge and finally shoot. Wearing the blindfold added such a visceral layer to my experience, while also applying a touch of vulnerability that I was already perceiving in stepping out of my creative hibernation.
A little bit of much needed sensory deprivation to elicit some feelings of belonging in and to this forest and in and to myself.
more soon
