Chosen family
Added 2023-08-02 02:29:19 +0000 UTCHey, all! It’s not often that I pour any personal or emotional information out there, but I want to explain what I’ve been going through in the last few weeks or so.
Recently one of my cousins got married. Third one this year, actually. And it’s also the third wedding in a row that I wasn’t invited to.
This isn’t something I’d take personally, however my siblings were invited and they also attended. Both my mother and father were invited though being divorced for thirty something years. So… why wasn’t I? And why do I only learn of these events when mutual friends or family have posted them on Facebook? Why am I continuously excluded from weddings and family events from a group of people who say they “support me”? While they have always tried to reassure me that they love and support all I do, their actions have always said otherwise. And I’m constantly gaslit when I point it out. Even being told by one family member that I’m taking not being invited “too personally”.
As a result I’ve unfriended my entitle family on Facebook, irregardless of how infrequent my activity is there. It became too obvious being the only “Carter” constantly being excluded from weddings and family events that I no longer belong to that family. Time and time again I have tried to be a part of my own biological family, only to be disregarded each time, and by extension, my son has too. While I always understood the importance of chosen family, I now see just how vital it is to my own survival. I’m painfully aware my biological family does not view me as family. They haven’t for a long time, and I’ve finally come to grips with it.
