Chapter 1: “The Phoenix” (teaser)

She was breathing deeply, sweat rolling down her forehead only to fall off her chain. She trembled from the weight of her nightmare before she pulled in a deep breath, letting it out slowly to calm herself. She turned towards the table next to her bed to reach for her phone, hesitating when she realized how far the table was pushed back with the force of her uncontrolled power. Her shoulders slumped in disappointment in her inability to control her power once again. She waved her hand in the direction of her phone, using her ability to lift it and place it into her hand. Taking a glance at her locked screen to check the time. 

‘3:30? Not even an hour passed by.’

She threw her blanket off of her, pushing herself out of bed. Knowing that there was no possible way for her to go back to bed, she pulled her shirt off in an attempt to cool off her overheated body. Signing to herself, she ran her fingers through her sweat drenched hair, feeling the memories of her nightmare bubbling at the surface of her mind. Trying to block out the memories of her dream, she concentrated on a technique that professor xavier. Closing her eyes and gripping her hands at her side, she proceeded to try locking them behind a mental volt she created in order not to deal with anything complicated. 

But it wasn’t working. Her mind was running a mile a minute, spinning out of her control. Like she was barely holding onto her sanity. She gripped her hair painfully, tugging harshly in frustration as she felt the floorboards beneath her shake under the weight of her powers.    

‘Stop thinking!! It wasn’t real, Jean! Block it all out. Make it stop!’

Running away again, Jean?

“Wha-?”

How many times do I have to tell you . . . listen to me.

‘Shut up!’

How many times are you going to make the same mistakes? ‘Shut up!” How many times do I have to FIX YOUR MISTAKES!? ‘SHUT UP!!’ Are you going to waste this golden opportunity AGAIN?! ‘I’M IN CONTROL!’ Are you going to watch her die again?

Jeans eyes suddenly opened in surprise. The shaking of the floor suddenly stopped. She slowly let her hands fall from her hair, falling limp along her sides. The only thing that could be heard within her room was her deep uneven breathing. 

You can make me the villain and blame everything on me as you always have done. But I will not allow you to waste the power I used to send us back. 

‘It was just a dream . . . . there's no way I would have been married to Scott . . . and messing with another man . . .’ 

She let out a broken sob. ‘There’s no way I would have tried to kill myself . . . and put my family in danger. THERE’S NO WAY I WOULD HAVE LET HER DIE!’ 

You’re a coward. You let all that happen. Because you keep DENYING me! And as always, I’m left with cleaning up after you.

“The professor wouldn’t have-”

HE WANTS TO CONTROL US! To limit our potential, to keep us caged here. Look where that took you. Used by both sides and at the cost of our mate. 

‘Mate? Scott?’

Don’t play dumb, it’s beneath you to act this ignorant. 

Jean looked down at where her phone had fallen, staring at the still lit up screen, her eyes glued to the picture of Ororo and herself. Smiling like they had no care in the world, realizing the level of gentleness her gaze held when it was directed to the mocha skinned girl. She bent down, grabbing her phone to take a closer look at the photo.

Memories of her played beneath her eyelids, showing a smiling Ororo. Laughing, getting worried, even getting angry at her. The memories flashed by like a fast slideshow, showing her an outside perspective of what she did with her life. She frowned harshly, seeing times when she ignored Ororo in favor of accepting Scott’s advances and Logan’s interest. Pushing her confusion of her interest in Ororo to her mental volt, drawing a clear line between who she wanted and what she thought was normal.   

‘Ororo . . . .’