CWD: OE ~ Twenty-Six

Brie interrupted the Archer before he could go any further. “Is everyone in the Breakfast Club okay?”

“Yes, for now.” Taye swallowed and gestured back the way he had come. “We jailbroke Kristie, then ran for the entrance to the Welcome Dungeon. We had to kill… a lot of CrossHumans. It was… we were killing actual people, and we earned a lot of credits for it. But I hated it. I hated it so much. They were going to eat us!”

At that, his strange expression turned into a fierce glare as he searched the group for any judgment in their eyes. All he found was a slight sick look on three of the four, while Nacho merely met his anguish with eyes full of understanding; perhaps also a slight hint of boredom. The cook nodded, reaching over to grip Taye’s shoulder in a firm grasp. “These things happen. Don't beat yourself up about it. What happened then?”

“Abyss, you’re cold about this stuff, dude,” Reuben muttered, earning a droll look from Nacho as Taye calmed down enough to move on.

“I’m sure you saw the message about the gate up there being open? Don’t worry about our side. We had to fight our way through this, like, super old medieval dungeon, and fought some weird stuff. Between Kristie and Hazel, we managed to cause a cave-in and made it so the caves that connect the dungeon to the UnderFun are impassable.”

Nacho felt a wave of relief. Not only were all of his friends still alive, but they didn’t need to worry about the CruxTerrans coming at them from multiple directions. “Spectacular job, my friend. Everything you did had to be done. How did you find us?”

Taye itched the side of his head with his bow as his body slowly deflated; the tension he had been holding while preparing to defend himself seeped away. “I was doing some scouting. When I heard voices, I got ready to fight more CrossHumans. I was so surprised to see you guys that I nearly thought you were an illusion! It’s really, really good that you’re here. We didn’t want to do the Starvation Dungeon without our big hitters. We were going to try anyway, but we all knew we’d fail. C’mon!”

“Starvation Dungeon?” Nacho felt icy dread start to build up inside him as the Archer guided them through the maze of streets. Out of all the crazy names of dungeons he’d encountered over the years, this one felt like it would be the worst. Starvation meant loss of Skills and a rapid death. “You found it, then? Apparently, it’s the key to the entire Juxtaposition.”

“I saw that.” Taye nodded but didn’t slow. “Just so you know, we can’t go through the entrance until the CruxTerrans are in place. It seemed like a really bad idea to go in on our own, but the alternative was going to be fighting our way back up and then out past the army.”

“Back up a tiny bit.” Brie finally spoke up. “Did you say something about getting a ton of credits?”

Taye’s face paled slightly, and his reply came out a little quieter. “Yeah. Killing the CruxTerrans was… profitable. I don’t… I can’t spend those credits. It feels disgusting to think about. Oh! We got three million credits each for completing the Welcome Dungeon! There was also something called a Skillz Box, and some of us got the chance to buy new abilities.”

Nacho thought the Patrons were being uncharacteristically generous. He didn’t like it: if he were in a video game and had found a healing fountain and a bed in a room, he knew that the next fight was going to take everything he had. This situation was giving him the same vibe. “Was any of that taxed?”

“Only the killing,” Taye sheepishly informed him, though Nacho waved off his worries as he opened his guild management sheet.

Chips Guild Stat Sheet

Total Guild Credits: 664,900 credits

Total Number of Members: 6,511

Guild Master: Eli ‘Nacho’ Naches

Alternate Guild Master: Daniel ‘Mayor Dan’ Chronour

Third Alternate: Reuben ‘The Sultan of Sauerkraut’ Colby

Nacho was pleased that they had enough to bring Jennifer up to level Nineteen. He just had to convince her it was the right thing to do. It sparked a lively debate, which only ended because Taye of all people insisted. “Look, ma’am. I don’t know you, but you’re with us on this quest. From what I understand, if we don’t win this, humanity dies. Please don’t fight us on this. I earned a lot of those credits, and I want you to have them.”

Jennifer groaned but finally moved her pride out of the way. “Fine. I can’t believe you guys are throwing credits around like this. I’m sure you’re making your guild treasurer furious.”

Reuben rumbled with laughter, “Old Bill is going to be angry about something anyway. He’s not in charge of anything, but he gets all uppity about taxes.”

“To be fair, we do keep treating all the tax money like our personal piggy bank,” Brie pointed out.

Her husband only shrugged and showed off his lopsided grin, “Let’s just win this game, and then we can take a few months off and spend money solely on city development.”

Nacho grabbed credits from the guild’s coffers for the Brewer’s upgrade. He also pulled forty thousand extra credits for himself and the team as a safety net. Jennifer upgraded as begrudgingly as the Guild Leader himself spent money, her internal pain turning to actual pain as her characteristic upgrading set her mind and body alight for a few long minutes. The Brewer’s eyes finally flashed and she straightened up, panting heavily. “Okay, I’m upgraded, thanks to your generosity. I hope it was worth it. Here’s what you bought.”

Jennifer Ales

Class: Vat Attacker

Level: 19

Experience Points: 2,189,200 to Level 20!

Current Credits: 10,000

Skill Slots (5/5)

• Boot Camp Brewmeister (Passive) Level 19: Can use any Satiation Player item as a weapon, adds 10 damage to base weapon damage. Bonus damage one point/per skill level (currently 19 HP of damage).
  • Tier 1 Enhancement: Hurl any Satiation Player item at your enemies!
    • No Mana, Hydration, or Metabolic Cost
• Purify (Active) Level 19: Remove Putrid Mana from all sources of water everywhere! Make one gallon of delicious and nutritious water per level (currently 19 gallons).
  • Tier 1 Enhancement: Process water from 15 feet away!
    • Mana Cost = 5%
    • Hydration Cost = 5%
    • Metabolic Cost = 5%
• Mana Pop (Active) Level 19: Create a soda in a Juxtaposition bottle that restores 38 Thirst Points and 95 Mana Points!
  • Tier 1 Enhancement: Brew Soda from 15 feet away!
    • Mana Cost = 10%
    • Hydration Cost = 10%
    • Metabolic Cost = 10%
• Stone Soup Mistress (Active) Level 19: Increase any food source by 38% by dropping a stone (and actual food) into your deliciously purified water. Note: Soups/Stews increase both Hunger Points and Thirst Points.
  • Tier 1 Enhancement: Soup it up from 15 feet away!
    • Mana Cost = 5%
    • Hydration Cost = 5%
    • Metabolic Cost = 5%
• Mighty Mixology (Active Ability) Level 19: The subtle art of Mixology is only practiced by the bravest of Mixologists, and it’s a rare Brewer indeed who will risk their sanity and stomach to concoct a variety of potions, tonics, elixirs, and philters. To make the juices that Players crave, you must be un-philtered. This Skill allows the Brewer to create potions that can do all sorts of things. But like the best bartenders, you must have a recipe and at least three ingredients.
  • Tier 1 Enhancement: Mix your potions from 15 feet away.
    • Mana Cost = 99%
    • Hydration Cost = 99%
    • Metabolic Cost = 99%

Nacho skipped the characteristic points of the Stat Sheet quickly, since it matched Reuben’s and Brie’s perfectly with the round-robin method of upgrading. When he got to her last Skill, he paused, unsure what he was reading at first. Jennifer saw his confusion mirrored in the faces of everyone reading her sheet. “I can purify water, and I can make some soup, and I can brew the soda that Reuben likes so much. However, I was always a little disappointed that, as a Brewer, I couldn’t do more potions. Finally, I have a skill that allows me to do just that.”

The cook tried to think of a few options for her Skill, but nothing was coming to mind. He was already lost in his own class, and he had no desire to figure hers out as well. “Do you have a cookbook? I keep my recipes in a central cookbook that I had to buy, and… it was pricey.”

Jennifer snatched a slim leather volume out of thin air, far smaller than Nacho’s Coquinaria. “I bought my Cocktail Menu, though I don’t have much in it. My Mana Pop was the only real magical drink, and the rest are just non-magical beer, some ginger ale, and some pretty good root beer.”

“Blood and cheese, baby!” That got Reuben’s attention. “I would argue that root beer has a magic all of its own.”

Jennifer grinned at him, the nervousness in her eyes fading. “Maybe. But with my Mighty Mixology skill, I think I can start making any number of powerful potions.”

“I don’t mean to interrupt, but I’m sure Abby and Kristie are wondering where I’m at,” Taye broke in, trailing off as he became the center of attention. “We don’t want to keep them waiting?”

“You’re right,” Nacho agreed easily as they started moving again, having paused to upgrade the new addition.

Contrary to what he had just asked of them, when they started moving past a few specific buildings that blocked their view, Taye warned them to slow down. “We made a few mistakes here in the UnderFun. We didn’t know, though we should’ve. We came across these huge buffalo beasts called Resent-o-potamuses. They were fine until we killed one, but then the entire herd came after us. It’s like they have some kind of telepathy—kill one, and the rest of the species goes hostile and hates you forever.”

They came across several of the carcasses, huge, horned beasts that were in the process of melting into puddles of Putrid Mana on the street. Nacho was disappointed he hadn’t been there; he could’ve processed the ingredients and grilled some of the meat to refill their empty food pouches. “Once we get to the rest of our people, I’ll see what I can cook up. While I’m not a good cook yet, I’m getting better all the time.”

“Practice makes better, right?” Jennifer gave him a little grin as a sly smile appeared on his face. “I guess I can only hope for the best. Your donuts didn’t fill me with much confidence.”

“A-hem.” Nacho coughed into his fist and quickly changed subjects. “I would imagine you can buy potion recipes from the Store, right? Have you had a chance to look?”

“A little. But the recipes are devilishly expensive. There was one I found that might be good. It’s called a ‘Missile Margarita’, and it doubles the damage of any ranged weapon. Meeting Taye, I think it might be good for the Archer, though I’m not sure it’s legal for him to drink? Ha! Just joking… those laws went out the door with the electricity. It’s single-use, though. You drink it, and then your next attack carries the bonus. There’s another one like it called ‘Root Beer Bash’, for melee attacks. I’d love to get both, and then I can brew them up for the Body Players. But, I’ll readily admit that the description of the Skill has me worried. It says it’s dangerous to brew potions; do you know what that means, exactly?”

“I’ll risk it!” Reuben dashed forward and caught up with them specifically to volunteer. “Root Beer Blast, Jennifer? Please. I am a connoisseur of the rootsy non-alcoholic beverages.”

Brie, up front with Taye, agreed with the sigh of someone who had seen far too much. “He actually is.”

“The danger likely comes from the actual creation of this stuff. I can’t imagine that a Mana potion stored near a fire wouldn’t explode, right?” Nacho shrugged and moved on easily. “If this were a game, I bet you’d be more like an Alchemist than a Brewer. That means you need to make sure you aren’t poisoning people you don’t mean to poison, like yourself.”

“I guess that makes sense.” She went silent as they stepped around the corner of a stocky building. On the other side of the tenements, the asphalt cut through a forest of more dead trees. They finally left the city behind and traveled through the trees until Taye brought them to an ugly concrete bridge spanning a mere trickle of a stream.

Across the bridge, the road ended in a wall of solid rock. Another Portal broke up its blank expanse, but unlike the one on the surface, this one didn’t stink. In fact, it smelled like a Thanksgiving dinner: everything from the roasting turkey, to the smell of coffee, to the definite aroma of pumpkin pie baking. Or was it apple? It seemed to change—just when they thought they smelled the most delicious thing possible, a new fragrance made their taste buds go crazy. Sparks constantly erupted from the waving purple light spelling ‘Starvation Dungeon’ atop an archway.

Kristie, Abby, and a smattering of other people were camped out on the banks of the stream. They all leapt to their feet and came storming over to give the Dinner Party hugs.

“It’s so good to see you, Bucko! I knew, I just knew that you’d come for us. Who’s the new girl? A big backpack, spoons… you found yourself a lady cook? Good for you!” Abby had tears in her eyes when she pulled Nacho into a crushing embrace. She turned and pumped Jennifer’s arm like she had found her new best friend. “Don’t know who you are, lady cook, but we are glad to have you with us.”

“Brewer, in fact.” Jennifer smiled and extricated her hand from the iron grip. “You’re a frontliner as well? Very cool. I’ve seen Brie in action. Can’t wait to see what you can do. Once I get the credits, I might have a cocktail that will really help you bring the heat!”

Kristie stepped forward with a troubled expression as she focused on her Guild Leader. “Thanks for coming for us, Nacho. I’m sorry I got captured.”

“Not your fault.” Nacho tapped his fingernails against the sheaths of his knives as he tried to move past the teary welcome. “Can you fill me in on the situation?”

“Did I hear she’s a Brewer?” Another Mind Player, Hazel, brightened. She was an older woman, middle-aged, who’d lost her husband in the Kansas City Downtown UnderFun. “That is great news! I got this new shield spell to keep people safe, but it costs a huge hunk of Mana.”

Nacho smiled warmly, trying to remember that even though dealing with people could be a challenge, he liked his guild members. He also loved discussing Skills. With his knowledge of the Juxtaposition, he was particularly good at providing people with different paths for optimizing their abilities. His eyes never left Kristie, and she nodded to indicate that she would be ready to tell him what she needed when they were done catching up.

Taye then introduced five Body Players that had also been part of the group grabbed from the Bove’s Lair. Taye referred to them as the Five Sword Guys, though one of them laughed at that. “Yeah, that’s us.”

Though Nacho waited patiently for an explanation of the joke, none was forthcoming. Those Five Sword Guys did look intimidating—all of them were fully kitted out with red metal armor, hand-and-a-half swords, and kite shields, and they clearly knew how to use them. All were well on their way to Tier two, though nowhere near the inflated levels the Brunch Force was bringing to bear.

After introductions, and just before he started getting annoyed by all the too-relaxed conversation, Nacho couldn’t help but try to enter the Portal. He and his friends approached the sparking panel of light, their senses inundated by delicious scents the closer they came. The cook felt his stomach rumble and his mouth salivate as he slid a hand into the light, pushing through.

Hey, Player! We love that you are excited to run the Starvation Dungeon! You’re so plucky! However, you can’t start until CruxTerrans are on the other side, on your world, and in position. Arriod QuaJohn is probably your best bet. Just be patient, and before too long, you’ll be running that dungeon down! May Your Future Be Delicious!

The cottony light around him hardened, squeezing him out of the Portal. He staggered back and stumbled right into Jennifer’s arms. The Brewer caught him before he managed to right his balance. “Easy, buddy.”

“My turn!” Reuben pushed into the Portal, only to come staggering back. “Yep. We’re going to have to wait. It definitely feels like a race.”

Nacho knew right where he was going with that line of thinking. “Well, if we’re running a race, we need to carb load. Jennifer and I will start on the delicious snacks.”

“I can’t wait to mix it up,” the Brewer laughed as everyone except Reuben rolled their eyes.

Reuben shook his head at the reactions commiseratingly. “No one appreciates us like they should.”