CWD: GA ~ Thrity-One

The evening was gray and cold, so the strangers might just want to enjoy their fire. Or they might have murder on their minds. When his friends didn't answer right away, Nacho made an executive decision. “Stay down there!”

Brie shot to her feet. Accessing her chainmail from a Storage Slot, she was dressed for battle in a flash. She gripped her hammer firmly and angled it over her shoulder in anticipation of an ambush. Reuben clearly didn’t believe they were in much danger. “Guys, it’s just people down there. They’re probably scared, hungry, and totally clueless. Why are we freaking out again?”

“Think of any zombie movie.” Nacho stood and grabbed his knives. He might not get credits for murdering other people, but making sure he was the one to kill the bandits meant his friends would suffer less.

Reuben grimaced and tried to wave his friends down. “This isn’t a horror film, this is just life. Okay, so maybe there is some overlap-”

“Don’t come up. We’re armed. Give us a minute to talk.” Nacho cut his friend off as he yelled to the people below. Then he looked back to his friends, his expression firm. “We have over three hundred credits. We bring Reuben up to three with Healing Hugs and level four with Positive Vibes—we bring Brie up to level five in both her Combat Dash and Defensive Whirl. Reuben can be the damage sponge while Brie brings the hammer down.”

“Let me upgrade my Marketing Skill instead,” Reuben added quickly. “Trust me, it’s cheap. Just twenty credits, and I talk these people into giving us credits for your iffy cooking.”

Nacho feigned being hurt. “Ouch, Reuben. Cooks have feelings too. No, we can’t splurge on your Marketing skill just yet. Upgrading you both will leave us only twelve credits.”

“You’re going to regret that.” Reuben adjusted his misshapen leather helmet. “It’s all about branding.”

“Says the guy in the abomination of a hat.” Nacho twirled his knives again and again, idly evaluating their maneuverability. If only he’d been able to add to his Small Blades Skill.

“Are you all still up there?” The fact that the guy was shouting was a good sign. Shouting was better than screaming bandits rushing up with clubs and sticks. Or with swords, crossbows, and magical armor.

Nacho hopped up onto the rocky ledge facing east but quickly slid onto his belly and crawled to the edge. If the group had somehow managed to find bows, he didn’t want to give them a target, especially since he didn’t even have a shield to protect himself. Brie and Reuben joined him a moment later.

In the gray light, they could see most of the people, though some were partially obscured by the shadows of the forest. A portly man in a ragged suit, smeared with mud, waited at the bottom of the tumble of rocks. He had a pretty decent double-bladed battle axe—he looked like the mayor of a small town who had raided the props closet at a local theater, and he was the guy doing the talking.

Next to him stood a gawky teenage boy with dark skin and thick freckles, wearing a leather cuirass and holding an arrow nocked to a great bow. A few of the other people gripped rusty short swords and shields, but most only carried long sticks and knotted clubs. At least a couple dozen people had clustered at the foot of the cliff.

Reuben squinted and counted everyone. “They look like normal people. I’m going to stand up and talk with them. Don’t worry; even though I’m a level zero marketer, I know the ABCs of selling: always be closing.”

“Wait.” Nacho didn’t like any portion of this situation. He’d wanted to march up to the top of Armor Mountain, with his meat already cooked and with Brie standing tall and proud.

Reuben patted Nacho’s back. “It’s okay, man. I have my cheesy ring. If the kid takes a shot at me, I’ll just absorb the damage.”

“Then I’ll smash his bones into almond butter,” Brie hissed, a promise that made Reuben shudder.

“T-that’s so sweet!” He stuttered as he got to his feet. The Healer was wearing his chainmail, which was good, but also the leather helmet—which was bad. The big guy smiled and waved at the motley group below. “Hey! Sorry it took us a bit. We had to level up our fighting skills, in case, you know, you were unfriendlies. But you all don’t look like bandits to me.”

Nacho liked that Reuben had started off by emphasizing that they had fighting skills.

To further drive the point home, Brie stood up with her fiancé. She looked tough with that big two-handed hammer over her shoulder, let alone her sabatons, mail shirt, and gleaming silver helmet. She could’ve played an extra Valkyrie in a movie and sold the bit by not saying a word, just standing there and glaring down at the people.

“Hey, we’re not bandits, I assure you!” the portly man with the battle axe claimed. “I’m Dan Chronour. I was the mayor of Bonner Springs before, you know, the Juxtaposition.”

“You look like a mayor,” Reuben agreed with the man, putting him on the off foot. “Well, better Bonner Springs than Liberty Missouri, right?”

“Ha! I get that all the time.” The battle-axe mayor paused. “You know, we smelled meat cooking earlier this afternoon, and it didn’t have that terrible stink to it that all our food does. That wouldn’t have been you two… would it?”

“It was our group, yes.” Nacho got to his feet reluctantly.

Reuben stroked his chin with a big gauntlet. “You know, Dan, we have a special player with us. Our buddy can cook food that doesn’t make you sick, not like the Putrid Mana-filled meat around here does at least. I’m sure you’ve tried to eat the animals around here, and it probably tastes like warmed-over green dog feces.”

“There isn’t any better option,” another voice called out sadly.

Reuben stood with hands on his hips. “Hey, Dan, how about you and… let’s say five of your people come up, and we can talk. Maybe have something to eat? We were going to open a little restaurant and sell our food. It’s delicious, and a lot cheaper than the Store. Maybe you can tell us your story, and we can tell you ours.”

Whispers erupted from below, the main one being, “There’s a store? Where?”

Nacho didn’t like the situation: two dozen people, even with stick spears and tree-branch clubs, would be hard to deal with. Even six against three wasn’t too good, depending on their levels.

Even so, Nacho could safely assume Dan and his ragtag group of underdressed and ill-armed people weren’t a threat. He didn’t want to teach them the command to open the Store yet; they’d probably use whatever meager credits they could get their hands on to buy food or to level up their classes and not their Skills. It was a rookie mistake that his party now had the option of teaching them to bypass.

In the end, Mayor Dan came up with only two other people: Taye, who was the freckled guy in the leather cuirass, along with a Mind Player named Kristie. She was a big girl with sparkly pink hair and a happy grin. Just the fact that Kristie was there—an obvious magic-user, and so very nice—was a clear attempt to put Nacho at ease. But he wasn’t taken in. She could just be a lure.

Nacho put on three fresh steaks to fry in his pan. This time, he knew to flip them as they cooked, and he knelt to prepare dinner while Reuben and Brie chatted with their guests.

Taye eyed the piles of deer steaks with obvious hunger in his eyes, while Kristie was growing as pink with nervousness as the fading dye in her hair, which left Mayor Dan to do all the talking. “Listen, you three seem to know what’s going on. I mean, you have very nice armor, and you have the ability to cook without making us sick? This smells better than anything we’ve tried, at least. I’m with some people about a day’s walk from here. We’ve been searching for dungeons. We found a little one, just a bare room, but we were able to get some things from it.”

“So my question is…” He slapped his battle axe onto the ground. “Can you offer us any advice?”

“How about we eat first?” Reuben suggested easily, trying to bring the conversation to where he wanted to take it. “There’s three of you, and the going rate for a Nacho’s Famous Venison and Hotcakes Tray is six credits. How about he cooks you something special? Not only is the food better than the Store, it is far cheaper too.”

“You keep saying ‘store’ like it means something to us.” Taye laid his huge bow on the ground. “No offense, Reuben, is it? How do we know this isn’t a trick? Or if it’s poison or not? Or if it’s good? It might not be good.”

“Is Nacho your real name?” Kristie stared at Nacho with her big doe eyes, which backfired spectacularly, making the cook hunk over the venison and glare. She didn’t relent.

“Eli Naches.” Nacho ground out the admission begrudgingly. “Nacho for short. Taye. You’re smart to be suspicious of people. Have you had trouble?”

“Some. Initially.” Taye shrugged with a dismissive air, as if the ‘trouble’ had been something minor. For all The Dinner Party knew, it had merely been a few tussles.

Nacho didn’t care about losing a sale at this stage in the Juxtaposition, but he knew these people needed to be set at ease. “Once these are done, we can give you a free sample. We’ll eat some, you’ll eat some, and we’ll come to an understanding.”

He closed his eyes and added some Cooking Magic to the thickest of the deer steaks. It was close to being finished, so Nacho sliced off a few pieces with a series of slashes that made the other people nod appreciatively at his clear skill with the knives. Then he lifted a hunk on Cry and took a bite. The meat had the initial squish of juiciness, which was a good sign, but it turned dry after a few chews. He had a long way to go, but still not bad.

The System gave him a flash of a message:

Hey, Player, the Common Cook who prepared this Wight-Tailed Deer cooked it with love and slaughter in mind. Would you like to increase one of your stats by 5% of max?

Yes / No.

Nacho chose the ‘yes’ option and increased his Mental Energy stat. A second later, he checked his Stat Sheet and found that his maximum Mana had increased to twenty-six-point-five, though he was down ten Mana from using his Cooking Magic. He stood and offered up pieces of the meat to the guests.

When Taye took his bite, his eyes flashed. “Hey, I get a stat bonus? Cool; there’s no terrible aftertaste either. We’ve been cooking deer ourselves, but I think we got zombie deer or something. It was like… their bodies were okay, but their heads were kinda decayed. The meat had this rank smell, even the undecayed meat. It also wound up tasting rotten by the end of the first bite. Super gross.”

“Ghoul deer.” Nacho’s lip curled in disgust. “I’m surprised you tried to eat them. They start as necrotic flesh.”

Mayor Dan took a piece of steak, looking embarrassed as he tried to explain. “We were desperate. To be honest, we’re still desperate. Can I have some more? We’ll pay.”

Kristie looked embarrassed. “I think someone mentioned something about hotcakes? I’m assuming that’s a pancake? I miss pancakes.”

“I have some cold ones,” Nacho told her, his tone as dry as the meat. “They’re leftovers and probably not the best. Definitely not my finest work.”

Kristie didn’t hesitate. “It’ll be fine, I’m sure.”

“Why is this meat so much better than what you made us eat for dinner?” Reuben joked lightheartedly.

“Practice makes better. I’m a fast learner.” Nacho knew the System would weigh in on the business transaction.

Hey, Cookie, looks like people are noticing your culinary expertise! Do you want to sell a three-person meal of your deer and pancake jamboree? Fun fact: people can’t just steal your food without running into unspecified issues! You can just give it away, but we don’t recommend telling people that. It’s all too easy to chain a chef to a stove!

Yes / No.

Nacho chose the ‘yes’ option, and Mayor Dan scowled. “This apocalypse is bad enough, but those ‘happy’ System messages are a pain in my keister.”

“Hey, now, Mayor, let’s not start using such foul language,” Reuben chuckled as the group collectively rolled their eyes.

Nacho heard a *cha-ching*, and suddenly he had six more credits to his name, bringing them up to eighteen credits. If they could sell meals to all of Mayor Dan’s people, they could really clean up. “Let me put the hotcakes on the pan to at least warm them up. They might have a little more flavor after being fried in the deer grease.”

Brie picked up on something. “You said you were about a day’s travel from here. You wouldn’t happen to be from Armor Mountain, would you?”

“Armor what now?” Mayor Dan furrowed his brow as he considered all the landmarks he was familiar with.

Taye figured it out. “The big limestone mountain that appeared about where Armor Hills might have been? I mean, in the old Kansas City, not in this new place. Yeah, a bunch of us ran from the monsters—animal and human—and we took cover up there.”

“We passed by a few days ago.” Brie was slowly starting to open up. “We smelled you cooking.”

“Trying to cook,” Taye sighed dramatically. Nacho was glad Brie had left out the part that they had found a dungeon under the mountain. The meal was finally ready, and Nacho passed out deer steaks and pancakes to the three newcomers, who had gathered around the fire.

“How many people are up there on Armor Mountain?” Reuben inquired of the small group. Mayor Dan didn’t respond right away, as he was too busy chewing. It finally started dawning on Reuben that even Nacho’s terrible cooking was better than any alternative on the Starter World, and at that moment the Healer looked at his friend in a new light.

When Mayor Dan finally swallowed, he clearly still didn’t want to answer the question. “Is it just you three? I mean, I want to trust you, but if you’re part of a bigger group, I wouldn’t want to give away our numbers.”

It was Reuben that broke the tension. “Mayor Dan, it’s just us three, and yes, we’re amazing. We’ve figured out a lot of things about this world, but we have the same question. How can we trust you?”

Kristie, holding a piece of pancake, rolled her eyes. “Please. Look at us, then look at you. We’re barely making it, and you’re up here, eating like kings and wearing fancy armor and all outfitted in survival gear. It’s not like we have the option not to trust you.”

Taye was the one that pointed out the reality of their situation. “If we wanted to try to take your hilltop and your food, we would’ve had another group circle around and attack your rear. I took a chance on eating your steak, which very well could still be poisonous, or it might be some kind of food spell that you could activate whenever you wanted. At this point, we’ve been honest, and it seems you’ve been honest with us. Let’s cut the malarkey.”

“Malarkey?” Reuben recoiled and wrinkled his nose. “Were you homeschooled, by chance? I like it. Let’s open this up to the rest of your people. We can all sit down, eat, and hash things out.”

“We'll pay,” the Mayor firmly promised. “This doesn’t need to be a charity. We have some credits we’ve earned from various kills. But whatever information you can give us would be far more valuable than the food. How do we get this ‘Store food’-”

Taye and Kristie raised their hands to show they wanted to know as well.

“-and how do we eat cooked food without getting sick? That stuff isn’t fun, but it does keep us alive. I’d love to get rid of the ‘getting sick’ part, and you seemed to have figured that out.” In the end, the Dinner Party allowed them to call up the rest of their people, and everyone took seats on the rocks while Nacho got to work.

He bought another cast iron skillet, then widened his fire so he could cook pancakes on one pan and deer on the other. The cook finally broke down and bought a mixing bowl as well. He only had ten pounds of clean deer meat, but luckily, the HungerCry knives turned that into twenty portions.

Nacho was pleased to see that he was getting quite the kitchen going, but he wasn’t sure how he would be able to carry everything without purchasing some additional massive backpack. He’d have to see if there was some kind of funky storage for Satiation Players.

Soon the cliffside was filled with laughter and more sounds from the System as Reuben collected the money. Twenty-one people buying meals turned into seven meals for six credits each, and just like that, Nacho had been able to boost his team back up to forty-two credits. If there were hundreds of people encamped on Armor Mountain, they could start collecting credits by the fistfuls.

The people ate and chatted, mostly with Reuben, who loved people. The Healer took some time to teach people how to open the Store, and soon gasps of excitement and shock resounded through the stony outcropping.

Brie was polite, but she wasn’t relaxing; her hand was always on the shaft of her hammer. However nice Mayor Dan’s people seemed, it would take a bit for her to trust them.

Nacho fully appreciated that.

It was Taye, who was obviously the gamer of the group, who asked a critical question as he searched through the Store. “I see menus to start a party of adventurers, but I also see building orders for a guild. Do you know anything about that?”

Reuben opened his mouth to answer, then closed it. “Maybe Nacho can expand on that option. He’s the real gamer here.”

Nacho bit back a grin as he flipped a pancake with an actual spatula. It was so much easier than trying to use sticks on half-solid batter. “Let me finish cooking first. Then we can talk more about how terrible of an idea that would be right now.”

He had seen the benefits of guilding up, but he also knew about the drawbacks. The cook knew that he would have to proceed very carefully, or else they might wind up with a nightmare situation that would be nearly impossible to escape.