Libriohexer ~ 7!

Chapter Seven

“Well, is it warded?” Dizzy was getting too impatient, which Sam explained with a single annoyed glance. The team crouched at the top of a short descending staircase which ended at a set of impressively large bronze double doors, studded with rivets. A simple lever protruding from the wall on the left appeared to be the activation mechanism, but no one wanted to pull it until they were sure the door was the only thing it activated.

“Looks clean to me,” Arrow swallowed nervously. He licked his lips, pressed his eyes shut for a long beat, then opened them and threw the switch down. “Guess we’re gonna have to pull it to find out for sure.”

The doors swung out on silent hinges, oiled and as meticulously maintained as everything else in this dungeon. Better still, there were no darts or saws or mechanical flame throwers to char broil them. They inched forward, past the threshold and into the connecting room, which, if the map was correct, was the barracks. It certainly looked like a barracks at first glance.

The floors were rather plain and bare, while stone wrought bed frames lined each side of the room at evenly spaced intervals, trailing off into the cavernous darkness on the far side of the room. Somehow, each bed still had a mattress covered with neatly folded linens, and a hulking mechanical footlocker perched by the foot board.

At a quick scan, Sam counted thirty beds, though there were likely more that he couldn’t see, not even with his Dark Vision ability; a little skill he’d picked up thanks to his Night Prowler title. Although there was an ambient glow spilling in from the wall scones in the hallway, the lighting here wasn’t on. He glanced at the arched ceiling overhead and noticed there were a series of hanging crystalline lights, suspended from thick iron chains.

All were dead.

“Wedge formation,” Dizzy whispered as they pushed forward into the room. She shouldn’t have bothered to keep her voice down, since the sound of their footfalls was thunderous in the otherwise quiet room. They advanced slowly, clearing each set of beds in passing, making sure there weren’t any nasty surprises waiting to spring out from behind bulky frames or hulking footlockers.

Velkan stopped suddenly, fur standing on edge, ears laid back, teeth bared. He lifted a balled fist, hold, raised his nose, and took a long, deep whiff. A resounding *clang* cut through the silence. The scrap of metal over stone floated out from the darkness up ahead. “There is something foul in the air. Something is in here with us. It smells of oil and metal. Of death.”

Sam instantly toggled forward Fire and Ice Shurikens Tomes to his active positions, ready to unleash a flurry of paper at whatever horror-show was coming toward them. Around him, the others dropped into fighting stances. The *clang* came again, closer this time and accompanied by a flash of movement in a pool of inky black ahead.

“It sounds enormous,” Dizzy’s fingers tightened around the heft of her war maul. “Divines, but I hope we didn’t make a mistake by coming here.”

Sam held his breath, his heart thundering as the approaching creature stepped into the ambient light for the first time… then he had to refrain from laughing.

He’d been mentally preparing for some King-Kong sized metal golem, studded with spikes and wielding rusty machetes and gatling guns. Instead, he found himself facing down a pint-sized mechanical minion that couldn’t have stood more than four feet tall. The creature had a metal potbelly with a sapphire pulsing at its center.

It was balanced on a pair of spindly legs capped with comically oversized metal boots. Its arms were likewise scrawny, ending in bulky forearms that would give Popeye a run for his money. The mechanical automaton had a humanoid face, with a pronounced nose, wide blue eyes, and - most unbelievably of all - a handlebar mustache crafted from bronze.

A hipster robot.

The mini automaton had a hubcap-like shield plastered on one arm, which ended in what looked like an arc welder. In the other hand, the little bot wielded a wrench that was nearly as big as it was. Honestly, Sam thought the guy looked cute. It could’ve passed as card-carrying member of the Lollipop Guild.

The shadow of a smile slipped from Sam’s face when he heard another *clang*, then another… and another still. Three more of the automatons stepped into view, one carrying a comically large mallet with a head as large as a cinderblock, another with a buzz saw affixed to the end of one wrist, the last wielding what looked to be a mechanical mop.

The wrench-wielding leader of the quartet regarded the interlopers for one long second more, canting its head to the side like an inquisitive puppy. It let out an odd, high pitched chatter. Its fellows responded in the same nattering language, their eyes pulsing as they talked. Wrench finally straightened its head and squinted, mustache quivering in anger. It opened its mouth, let out a raucous, high-pitched squeal, and charged.

Naturally, the others followed in its wake, spidery legs eating up the distance in no time, impromptu weapons raised and ready to kill. Dizzy’s voice rang off the walls and brass pipes, “Incoming! Kai, Velkan, create a funnel. Basic arc formation, centered on me! Arrow, back! Sam, suppressive fire!”

Everyone moved with the practiced ease of muscle memory, effortlessly falling into the formation that Dizzy had drilled into them a hundred times over. Dizzy bolted forward, her war maul ready to swing, while Kai dropped back half a step on her left, forming one leg of a reverse V. Arrow planted a foot on one of the heavy footlockers and launched himself into the air. He landed behind Dizzy in a crouch, bow drawn with an arrow knocked and ready to fly. Meanwhile, Velkan bolted forward in a blur, forming the right leg of the V. Sam turned on a heel and vaulted up onto one of the beds, giving him a clear field of fire.

That was one of the worst parts about being a spell-caster.

Out in the open he could sling magic without worrying about hitting a teammate, but in tight confines like these, it was almost impossible to safely spam spells without the risk of hitting a friendly.

Elevation fixed that nicely.

The first of the mechanical contraptions had rushed into the mouth of the V-shaped funnel, herded straight into Dizzy by a combination of swift punches from Kai and vicious claw slashes courtesy of Velkan. The iron-sided munchkin lashed out at Dizzy with the oversized wrench, but she dropped low and batted the blow aside with her war maul. The automaton was fast, though, feinting left, then driving forward and smashing in the side of her knee with his impromptu weapon. She let out a grunt of pain but somehow managed to keep her feet. Honestly, Sam had no worries about Dizzy.

Although her raw damage output wasn’t quite as high as Kai, she was a tank with enough constitution to take on a wrecking ball in a head-to-head skirmish… but there were still three more of the mechanical automatons to deal with.

Buzz saw and Mallet peeled off in a herringbone move like a pair of seasoned warriors and not mechanical janitorial staff. Buzz zipped toward Kai while Mallet took a ponderous swing at Velkan. The third minion launched himself onto one of the bulky bed frames, just as Sam had, then did something completely unexpected: it lifted into the air, propelled upward by telescoping mechanical legs. It leveled its mop, bringing it into place like a sniper rifle, and started firing off globs of water at the party. One of the watery blasts sideswiped Arrow like a battering ram, knocking him onto his back.

Arrow managed to gain his feet quickly enough, though, and started launching return fire at Mop. His aim was uncanny as ever, and one of his rounds careened directly into Mop’s mustached face with almost no effect at all. The razor tipped arrow ricocheted harmlessly off the tough metallic exterior.

Sam had to imagine that piercing weapons would be at a significant disadvantage to hit against the iron-skinned androids; but he was eager to see how they held up against magic.

“Let’s rock and roll, Bill!” he shouted as Mop focused on Arrow, who was dodging the watery bolts. Velkan and Kai, however, weren’t handling things quite so well in the melee department.

With a shout, Sam sent a Fire Shuriken whirling toward Buzz and an Ice Orb Shuriken screaming toward Mallet. The Fire Shuriken hit with an explosion and a flash of orange light. The force of the blow pushed the mechanical certain back a step or two and left a darkened soot smear across the creature’s breastplate, but that was it. The automaton looked annoyed, but it certainly didn’t seem to be hurt by the attack. Which made a certain sense to Sam. The shuriken itself primarily dealt slashing damage, which wouldn’t be effective against the heavy-duty metal, and the fire, likewise, wouldn’t do much against something created in a forge.

His Ice Orb Shuriken, on the other hand, was extraordinarily effective. The paper star shattered on impact and a coat of blue-white arctic power stole across the surface of the creature’s metal skin. Fingers of frozen magic crept down its arms, forming into deep crystals in the joints.

“The metal is a perfect conductor,” Bill shouted in excitement. “Plus, these things are powered by steam. All we gotta do is cool the water down enough and we’ll probably take ’em out of the fight for good.”

“On it,” Sam shouted in reply, triggering Bookmark then unleashing a hail of Ice-Orb Shurikens at Mallet. Already the automaton was moving at a snail’s pace, its limbs flailing around at quarter speed. The gem in its belly was flickering wildly and Sam knew that could only mean one thing: the water flowing through its veins was freezing. Velkan took advantage and darted forward, lashing out with his razor-sharp claws. As with the arrows, Velkan’s claws bounced along the surface, leaving shallow scratches in the metal but failing to penetrate the automaton’s exterior.

But Velkan was smart.

The Wolfman quickly reevaluated his tactics and readjusted, targeting the limbs and the relatively vulnerable joints. He dropped onto all fours and darted in, his mouth closing around a knee and crunching down like a hound gnawing on a bone. The metal groaned and, when Velkan shook his head, the limb snapped and popped. The automaton teetered precariously, its arms pinwheeling to compensate for the missing leg. Velkan pulled the limb from his jaws and wound back, smashing the clunky metal foot into the bot’s head with a resounding *clang*. The creature landed flat on its back, the light in its belly and eyes guttering like a candle flame before dying.

“Heads up, Sam!” Arrow yelled, though his warning was about half a second too late.

An orb of water the size of a bowling ball slammed into his chest, hurling him from the bed and knocking the wind from his lungs. Sam landed hard on his side, clutching at his ribs. Thank the celestial for his Papier-Mache Armor, though. His health was still abysmally low compared to the rest of his party members, and the armor had almost certainly saved his life. Though he couldn’t afford to take another blow like that; especially not from whatever water magic Mop was slinging around.

Since his armor was literal paper, both fire and water magic types dealt significantly more damage than normal melee damage. Bill thundered, “Legs! You gotta get up! We’ve got an angry janitor coming in to clean house!”

“Working on it,” Sam pushed himself upright with a wince, just in time to see another orb of water flying straight toward his head. He dove to the side, falling back on his rusty Judo skills as he tucked into a tight roll which brought him to his feet. Sam thrust a hand straight out and launched an Ice Orb Shuriken. Mop batted it from the air with the head of its weapon and sprang forward across the mattress tops on its telescoping legs. In seconds, the automaton was behind their lines and descending on Sam with a twirling mop of doom.

Sam acted on instinct, channeling energy into his palm and summoning his Quill Blade.

Twenty-three mana vanished in a rush and the oversized ostrich feather poking up from his hat rushed into his hand, transforming into the gleaming silver weapon he’d become so familiar with over the past few weeks. He brought the sword up high, just in time to block an overhand blow from the mechanical mop. He sidestepped and turned the improvised cleaning-tool-turned weapon with a flick of his wrist. He shot in, slicing at Mop’s exposed neck. But the automaton was lightning fast, and wielded his mop like a bow staff.

The cleaning implement was a whirlwind in the droid’s metal fingers, dancing and swooping, blocking every attack and quickly putting Sam on the defensive. The android countered a hasty thrust and lashed out with a kick that smashed into Sam’s ribs with a furious *crack*. A lance of blinding pain shot through Sam’s body, making it hard to think for a moment.

“What in the abyss are you even doing?” Bill thundered at him. “You’re getting beat by a mop! A mop, Legs! Remember your footwork! Get inside his guard and work the body. Control the fight.”

“Not helping, Bill,” Sam shrieked as he fought to right himself. Sweat poured down his face and his arms were already aching from the strain of the battle.

Bill wanted him to finish this fight up close, but Sam could already see he wasn’t a good enough swordsman to end things with the blade. He wasn’t built for a sustained melee assault; what he needed to do was open up some distance so he could sling some magic. Thankfully, Arrow provided him with an opportunity to do just that when he launched a feathered shaft into the automaton’s face. This time his arrows were tipped with small glass vials that shattered and exploded on contact, splattering a corrosive green goop across Mop’s face. The concoction sizzled and burbled, leaving pitted and corroded metal in its wake.

It also bought Sam just enough time to reach into Bill’s Soul Space, pulling free a non-magical book he’d picked up in a second-hand shop. Scrawled across the back of the volume was a simple activation rune, which would transform the boring book on common garden pests into a lethal bomb, fueled by wildly unstable Mana. With Book Maker’s Book Bomb, Sam could weaponize any book he could get his ink-smeared fingers on. He hurled the tome into Mop’s chest at less than three feet out, shouting the activation word as the book thumped into the droid. “Flash Bang!”

The book erupted in a curtain of golden light, enveloping the robot in a furnace of flame and oppressive heat that slapped Sam away like an oversized hand, badly singeing the skin on his exposed face.

Mop stumbled drunkenly from the momentary inferno, armor scorched in places and charbroiled in others. The bot looked dazed and confused, and Sam didn’t give it a moment to get its bearings. He launched a fresh wave of Ice Orb Shurikens, then darted in while frosty streaks of magic slowed the automaton. With a shout he dropped low and jammed his Quill blade through a vulnerable shoulder joint and into the bot’s torso. The creature sputtered and sparked, its head spasming as its eyes grew dim, the light fading to darkness.

Sam ripped his sword free and planted a foot in the automaton’s chest, knocking it to the ground with a clatter. “One down.”