Early Access: The Bond [China] E3-4

E3-4. This show is really growing on me, you guys. I'm so glad you all loved it so much that it pushed me into checking it out, coz I might put it off indefinitely otherwise. 😅

Thanks for all of your lovely words of support, and your genuine curiosity to know more about Mom's stories. I will share more for sure - starting with this set of episodes, heh.

One of the things Mom asked me to share, is about the naming of the kids, which some of you asked about in the last set of episode notes. Basically, casually naming children was A Thing, among the poor.

Essentially, most people were too poor and too uneducated to pick pretty, meaningful names for their children. Mom had a friend whose name literally meant Twelve (十二), and not even because he was the twelfth child. He was named Twelve because his brother before him had been named Eleven - and that, because that brother had been born with eleven fingers instead of ten.

This means that Dad's casual naming of Qiqi (Seven seven), because it was the year 1977, is not something particularly terrible; it was just the way a lot of people arrived at names for their kids.

Also, there's that beat in E1, where, when Aunt protests at Dad's naming of the baby, Dad sneers at Aunt, that he's not as scholarly as Qi Zhiqiang, her husband. With the context that I've just provided, doesn't this remark make a lot more sense? It's because Qi Zhiqiang is more educated, that he's able to select nicer names for his children. And his own name indicates that his own parents have some education, or at least, had the means to pay someone to choose a good and meaningful name for him.

The whole adoption arc, where Dad and Aunt arrange for Simei to be adopted by that childless scholarly couple, is quite a poignant one. I don't see Dad as being heartless, for giving Simei up for adoption, in the sense that he really does seem to believe that Simei will have a better life with that couple, than with him.

From what I've heard from Mom, it was common in those days, for poor families to give their children away, if they could not afford to feed them all. This wasn't an act of rejection; it was an act of care. This was the only way poor parents could have the assurance that their children would have a better life.

Perhaps because this was relatively common practice back then, the family doesn't even seem to react so strongly, when Dad informs everyone that Simei is to be adopted. And Simei herself even appears quite happy about the new life that awaits her - until she eventually runs away and comes back home.

I'm not sure what to think of Yicheng's attempt to get adopted in Simei's stead. On the one hand, it kind of feels like he's doing it to protect her, so that she won't have to leave the family home. And yet on the other hand, it also does feel like he's sincerely trying to find a new and better path for himself.

In the end, I feel like it's probably a mix of both, because Yicheng's heart for his siblings is clear to see, and I feel that even if he did move away to a better life, he would have used whatever opportunities he would have gotten, to channel it back into taking care of his family.

I do really feel for Erqiang, though, as he cries, after Simei's left. His little heart really seems to be broken, poor lil guy. I'm glad that in the end, Simei comes back, and the siblings are reunited.

I'm really relieved that Qiqi doesn't have polio, but that whole incident really brings out the goodhearted nature of Weimin. He really does care for Qiqi like an elder brother, and he's not about to let other people's talk about money and practicalities stop him from getting his little brother the treatment that he needs. I like him already.

On this point, I tend to think that Yicheng's too weighed down with family burdens and money worries, which is why he attempts to brush off Qiqi's leg problems. In the end, though, it's clear that he actually wants Qiqi to get treated, since he actually runs after Weimin to give him money for the hospital trip - even though they literally can't afford it.

Yicheng wanting to go to university, and Dad telling him not to study such long hours, so as not to waste electricity, reminds me so much of what Mom went through, back when she'd wanted to go to university.

Like I've shared, the family was very poor, and didn't have the money for school fees and such. It was common for kids to drop out of school so that they could start earning a living and start contributing to the household finances. My uncles (Mom's brothers) dropped out of school to work, as did my aunts (Mom's cousins). But Mom was good at her studies, like Yicheng is, and she did well enough to go to university, like Yicheng did.

Like Yicheng, Mom needed a solution that would take care of her school fees. Yicheng chooses to go to a teacher-training college, because the school fees are taken care of, and he's guaranteed a job after graduation. There wasn't such an arrangement here in Singapore back when Mom was getting ready to go to university, but Mom managed to get a scholarship from the Teochew Association.

Mom's Teochew, and did well at the interview, which is how she got that scholarship. The best thing Grandpa ever did for Mom, was tell her the name of their village back in China, before that interview, because the interviewers were impressed that Mom knew it, when they asked. Mom's scholarship was a rarity, made even rarer by the fact that she was a girl, since girls were generally discouraged from furthering their education, back in the day.

Similar to Yicheng, Mom also actively looked for ways to earn extra money, while in university, because she had to make up for the fact that she was not earning an income. If she'd dropped out of school, she would have at least earned money as a factory worker or telephone operator. So she gave tuition - kinda like Yicheng - in order to have that money to give to Grandma (Mom's mom). This way, as far as the household was concerned, it was as good as if Mom had dropped out of school and gotten a job. And this way, no one could fault Mom for not dropping out of school, and going to university, while her family was so poor.

Funnily enough, the scenes of Yicheng going to that big house to be that girl's tutor, reminds me of my dad. Dad, too, had given tuition, in order to make extra money, and he did once get invited to tutor some well-off girl who lived in a big house. This arc was uncannily similar - except I don't think Dad's student had the kind of interest that Yicheng's student seems to have in him. Orrr.. if she had, I've never been told about it. 😅

It actually makes sense to me that Erqiang stop school to get a job, because he's never been the studying sort, and he does seem much better with his hands, judging from the reports of his excellent cooking.

After all that going around with the wrong crowd, Erqiang really does seem to immediately want to hunker down and do a good job, the moment he gets assigned to his Master. This is a very different side of Erqiang that we haven't seen before, and I really like it, so far. He seems much more sensible and down-to-earth, while at work, wanting to do a good job for his Master and all. For his sake, I really hope he does well at his new job.

Next episode notes will be out on: Sunday, 31 Oct 2021!