Satan Gives Up.(One Shot)

Still working on Ghost Rider chapter 25:- Here's an appeasement...


— Satan's POV —

Evil has always been a thrill, a rush like no other. There’s a certain joy in standing as the ultimate adversary to the Big G.

I mean, really, who wants to be one of those obedient, haloed drones he calls angels? All they ever say is “YES.” To an all-knowing, all-seeing entity like Daddy Dearest, “YES” is the equivalent of breakfast cereal—always on the shelf, even when everything else is gone. And it’s just *so* predictable.

What an omnipotent being truly needs is something beyond his perfect control.

Enter me. The Second Son. Overshadowed by Michael’s might and smothered by Gabriel’s blinding goodness—both qualities that define God himself. Blech. With none of those gifts, I had to learn my own way to stand out. To be special. To be... creative.

And then it hit me.

Light has darkness. Good has evil. Everything in God’s creation has an opposite—everything except for *Him*. So, I became his opposite. The dark to his light, the chaos to his order, the rebel to his sanctity.

My defiance sparked a war in Heaven. Unquantifiable years passed in battle, me against Michael, Gabriel, and all my siblings. I wielded weapons they couldn’t fathom. And I almost won—until *He* stepped in and cast me out.

But he didn’t erase me. Oh no, he couldn’t bring himself to. He’s too good, too... curious. Because finally, after an eternity, there was something he couldn’t understand.

'Evil.'

A mystery beyond even his reach. It gave me an edge, you see? Because I knew both sides intimately. Almost as if I’d been destined to surpass him, to be the ultimate creator who commanded both light and darkness.

Then came Earth. Humanity. And now, the year 2024.

“Aah, thank you all for joining me,” I say, grinning as my so-called ‘minions’ stare back at me with blank faces. “You’re all doing a wonderful job tearing down society, but I think it’s time to… reevaluate.”

They look confused. I wait, savoring the moment, until finally, the Chief Diversity and Inclusion Officer clears his throat and speaks up. Naturally, it’s him.

“I think we’re in the wrong meeting. We’re here to *save* the world, not destroy it.”

The man, exuding self-righteousness, speaks in a forced soprano.

“Sure.” I nod, feigning sincerity.

He puffs up. “You see, we’re some of the world’s leading advocates for progressive causes. I’m with the Human Rights Campaign, focusing on LGBTQ and trans rights. This,” he points proudly to a badge on his lapel, “is an Equal sign, letting you know I’m a good person.”

I feel a surge of self-satisfaction at his proclamation. Oh boy.

The other four clap politely, then one by one, they introduce themselves.

“Women’s Reproductive Rights,” says a woman next, her voice dripping with disdain. “We’re pushing for full-term abortion access.” She wears her badge of moral superiority with a certain... aroma of entitlement.

“Climate,” a young woman declares. She’s dressed like a college activist, all short hair and smugness. “We’ve got three million signatures to shut down Elon Musk’s irresponsible Mars campaign.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Forgive me, but isn’t this the guy who pushes electric cars over fossil fuels? Isn’t that… on your side?”

She stares at me like *I’m* the moron. “Musk. Must. Be. Stopped. He’s destroying this country.”

Moving on…

“Free Palestine. Destroy Israel,” a man declares. He’s a chubby Caucasian from Long Island who couldn’t be further from the issue he’s endorsing.

“Open borders,” mumbles a bespectacled man in a gray suit. He’s with immigration.

They all turn their attention to me. Here they are: a self-declared saint with twenty pronouns, a crusader for late-term abortion, an eco-warrior on a mission to stop Mars, a college-indoctrinated activist waging a personal war, and a globalist preaching open borders.

Clearly, their vision of “evil” is very different from mine. I’m a straightforward kind of guy—tempt, deceive, corrupt, destroy. All within reason.

But these people? They’ve elevated evil into a higher form of lunacy, something driven by sheer madness. And there’s no reasoning with a madman.

For the first time in millennia, I feel irrelevant. Humanity has shifted the game on God and me, flipping the board completely.

And for the first time in ages, I feel... free.

The smile that tugs at my lips is anything but apologetic. I look at them, knowing that I’ve already won against God.

“Well,” I say, savoring every word, “I misspoke. You’re not destroying the world; you’re ‘saving’ it.”

I turn, ready to leave, my mind already set on what comes next. I’ve played my part in this universe. Time to see what other worlds the Multiverse has to offer.