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Now... Onto the more uncomfortable topicssss the one I mentioned in previous entry. Honestly I wasn’t sure if it’s alright to post it but things kept updating while I didn’t post it too lol aaand well I also didn’t want to post it since I do not like how all of this sounds different from how I usually am cuz now I feel like I would feel very veeery good when punishing someone ＿|￣|○ I’m getting off trail so we gotta leave that topic of self-exploration for later SO yeah... Here it goes:

Let’s try to be more open about how things work.

I really love doing cosplay, coming up with something new, gathering all the stuff for sets, location hunting, arranging smth for sets, sometimes editing something that cannot be done irl (except lucy….no love here), sharing my ideas and discussing them, reading what you thought about these ideas and sets. These are the things I enjoy doing. But unfortunately that's not all I end up having to do.

There are things that really disappoint and affect me in a negative way.

I end up having to engage with people who I already blocked who create multiple new accounts again and again and again, weirdo trolls asking me weird as hell questions, trying to get some kind of a rEaCtIoN from me, having to engage with people who leak my sets, having to PROVE that it’s them, after being gaslighted and listening to “this is not me IT’S MY FRIEND” excuses in the end. Like man at least take accountability for what you’ve done. why do that in the first place if you can’t even admit your fault oh my god. There was only ONE person who admitted their wrongdoing without further interrogation and were really nice about that, I appreciate them a lot! 😭🩷

I’m not going into full details about trolls and people that I have blocked but some insane things have been happening for the last several months that are worth a big google doc. Or a podcast. It’s insane.

All of this is extremely draining and honestly it feels like as soon as I deal with one then a new wild Pokemon appears and it’s just an endless cycle. Like new people, or long time supporters who I trusted. EVERY MONTH. For a half a year or so.

Like it’s really cool that ✨YOU✨ matter! Your desires matter, like yeah do your thing and whatever you like without thinking about the other party! I’m just a Thing doing nudes after all, me or my works shouldn’t be respected 👍 I tolerated this but surprise I am also a person, I have my worries, I can be stressed. And I am fed up!

So yeah I ended up hiring a person who takes care of situations like that. They were in internship for a few weeks and their main job is to filter out my private messages from alt-accs, trolls, and people who don't mean well etc and I read and reply to only filtered ones.

As for leaks, I always checked pics that were sent to me, saw all the names popping up, etc. Now I am not doing that either.

Anyway for that test period I ENDED UP FEELING SO GOOD!! This was the best decision I've ever made. So they’re gonna be working full-time.

Honestly all I want to do is cosplay and share my stuff with good-willed people who are nice and are willing to support me and engage with me in a good manner without any malice behind it. I want to engage with my community. I don't want to be a mix between Inspector Gadget and Detective Conan and try to figure out who and what decides to be malicious for no reason again. And I am not your punching bag. It’s insane that I’m even writing this when all I do is SEXY COSPLAYS and you may think tf she’s even talking abt what could’ve happened but believe me I am not overreacting or exaggerating.

SO what I'm trying to say is - you have absolutely nothing to worry about if you respect me and my rules here. I wanted to let you all know about the hiring situation because I want to be transparent about things like that. There should be no issues with that and no messages missed. BUT IF THERE ARE and your are 10000000000000% innocent but were blocked please write me on any other platform. It doesn’t have to be a paid one, insta comments for example are fine.

I cannot see this happening because there will be no “human errors” or such BUT since I will not be at charge anymore I want to have this back up plan.

If you do bad things all I have to say is: ‘well BYEEE’ and please DO NOT write me on any other platforms. DO NOT create new accounts. AND DO NOT think “welll maybe I’m gonna pass this as a mistake she mentioned earlier” no you will not. At least think FOR ONCE that I am also a living human being who wants to do their thing peacefully. While it is your deliberate choice to be a dick.

For now that’s what I think is the best way to keep MY mental health in a good and stable condition. If this still doesn’t help then well… I’ll find another way to keep myself safe. Cuz you know If there will be no me, there wouldn’t be content that you are so eager to mess with. Hope it’s easy to trace the logic. Thank you for reading this message, I hope for your understanding. I had two mere rules for patreon and its “Be polite”, “Do not leak” and well now there will be a third one Do not be a dick 🙏🙏 Thanks!!!!

Good hunters, sorry for having to read something uncomfortable!!! I both really wanna get this off my chest and not post it all but!!!! Well haha 😭😭