Princess Body Swap [Knight to Princess TG]

For Unsurpassed Travesty

When the princess of a magical kingdom is kidnapped, Sir Aldric decides to rescue her to win her heart and the throne only for the princess to reveal that she is in league with her ‘kidnapper’ an evil sorceress, and that she is sick of being a princess and wants somebody to take her place.

~ 

For most people in the kingdom, the princess being kidnapped was a tragedy. The King and Queen were beside themselves, of course, and the common people mourned, mostly because there would be no summer festival until she was found. The innocent young woman had been snatched from her bed chambers by the former court mage, an evil and greedy woman who the king had finally banished for trying to use her magic to run the kingdom from the shadows. 

All the brave knights of the realm took to their mounts to search for her, mostly out of the goodness in their hearts. They had taken an oath to protect the royal family at all costs. They probably looked quite chivalrous, marching stoically across the realm in their armour, but the truth was, beneath their helms, most of them were smiling. 

The princess being captured was a tragedy for most, that was true, but for a knight, it presented a unique opportunity. A chance to be a hero, to heroically save the day, and in doing so, woo and win the heart of the princess. It was one of the few chances a knight, of any station, even one of common blood, could climb his way onto the throne. That was what Aldric thought as he rode through the countryside. 

He’d heard that the court mage once kept a tower out in the thick woods at the edge of the kingdom. He was of noble blood, the son of the palace stablehand. He’d only lucked into his armour thanks to his skills on horseback. For some, that might be enough, but Aldric had ambition; he wanted more than just a ‘Sir’ in front of his name; he wanted a proper title, land, and a crown. The princess going missing was the best chance somebody like him, with little prospects and average looks, had of rising higher in the ranks. 

He’d only seen Princess Janelle once, but she’d taken his breath away. Dark red hair, pale skin and vivid green eyes. She’d had ballads written about her beauty and for good reason. Personally, Aldric was a fan of the ones sung down at the local tavern, the ones that talked more about the obvious assets under her dress, rather than her virtue. 

The sun was setting by the time he spotted a shape between the trees, a tower made of dark stone with a single window atop it. If that wasn’t an evil witch’s lair, he didn't know what was. He tied his horse to a nearby tree and drew his sword, continuing on foot, ready and wary of any tricks the witch might play. 

The first guardian leapt from the shadows, a magical wolf stitched from dead wood, its eyes two burning red coals. Alric didn’t flinch. He only had one shot, and he couldn’t be sure if he was being watched. He wanted to impress. With a scoff, he sidestepped the beast’s lunge and drove his blade through its chest. With a screech, the creature was ash, and Aldric grinned. 

“Hardly worth drawing my sword,” Alric muttered, flicking his blade clean with a single, dismissive flourish. He hoped the princess was watching from the tower; she was bound to be impressed. 

Next came a swarm of shrieking wind spirits with razored wings and sharp icon claws. They screamed as they zoomed around the tower protectively, but Aldric didn’t back down. He hacked and slashed through them, feeling their claws rake against his metal armour. In only a few minutes, they were all reduced to dust.

“I thought this witch was supposed to be strong,” he laughed loudly.

The bravado wasn’t even an act, really. He had been prepared for something far scarier than a few lowly monsters. His knight commander had always called him ‘average in every way’, this proved him wrong! 

Alric strode to the front door. He kicked it open, sword at the ready, expecting the witch to have come running, but the room was empty. He scanned the room quickly, then headed for the staircase. At each turn, he expected the witch to come, to try and use her magic or seductive wiles to ensnare him, but she didn’t. She’d probably seen how easily she dispatched her guardians and ran away in fear. 

Finally, he reached the top of the tower and found a door waiting for him. It was made of black wood inlaid with silver filigree, and a large silver lock bolted it shut. Alric ran a hand through his hair, flexed his shoulders, and smiled.

“Your guardians are pathetic, witch. Let’s see if your locks are any better.”

He gripped the hilt of his sword and took a deep breath. On the other side of this door was the princess, probably terrified and in need of comfort. He had to play this perfectly. This image would live in her mind forever, her knight in shining armour rushing to the rescue; he had to make it perfect. 

Rather than kicking down this door, Aldric stabbed his sword through the lock and pushed it open, removing his helmet. He hoped his hair was romantically tousled like in all the stories. On the other side of the door was a simple bed chamber, complete with a large, white bed, upon which sat the Princess. Janelle was just as beautiful up close as she had been from a distance, and she smiled at him as their eyes met. This was it; the first step toward his future as King. 

“You came to rescue me, brave knight?” She asked.

“Of course, my lady.” He came to kneel before the bed and took her hand, kissing it gently. Her skin was so soft, not at all like the cheap bar wenches he’d bedded in the past. Suddenly, he was very glad he was wearing armour that couldn’t bend the same way loose pants could. 

“Hmmm,” She stood and circled him quickly. “You look plain enough…tell me of your life.”

“There will be time for that later, Princess, for now I must get you to safety. Do not worry, those foul beasts are no match for me.”

“No, it’s okay, come, sit.” She said gently. “The witch is away right now. We have time.”

Aldric hesitated. Was this some sort of trick? Was this really the witch trying to fool him into thinking he’d saved the princess? Aldric hid a smile; he was no fool, but perhaps if he let her think he was, she’d let her guard down. He sat, and the princess held his hands in hers.

“Tell me about yourself.”

“I am nobody special, your highness.” He said humbly, “A stableboy, turned knight. I only wish to serve and protect you, I swear.”

“And you get to travel the land for my father? Fighting creatures and seeing new places?”

“Yes,” He bragged, “I am quite accomplished.”

This was win-win. If this really was the princess, he got to show off, and if it wasn’t, then the witch knew he was experienced. Maybe he could even intimidate her into revealing herself. The princess reached out to cup his face, and Aldric felt his heart skip a beat.

“And you have such a plain face, not ugly, yet not striking either, I bet nobody ever gives you a second look.” She said with sympathy. “You’re perfect.”

“Perfect for what?”

The princess stood.

“Morgana? I like this one, we can do the swap.”

Aldric blinked in surprise. What?

The air beside the bed warbled, and a woman appeared, dressed in dark purple robes with black hair and equally black lips. The former court mage, Morgana.

“You were here the whole time?!”

Aldric drew his sword. “Stay back, your highness. I will protect you!”

“Oh, give it a rest.” Morgana rolled her eyes, “This one? You’re sure?”

“Yes, he’s got the perfect combination, a plain face, a job that involves adventure, and he’s not too bright, so he won’t be able to reverse the change.”

They were speaking as if he weren’t even present. Aldric looked between them in shock as he felt realisation crash down on him.

“You’re…working together?”

“See?” Princess Janelle said, “Not bright.”

“W-what is going on?”

The princess turned to him and huffed in frustration. “I’m bored, that’s what. Do you have any idea how dull life is being a pretty maiden, sitting in the castle all day embroidering?”

Aldric’s mouth opened and closed; he had no idea what to say.

“Morgana here hatched a plan: we’d find me a nice adventurer to swap with. I get a life of fun, you get to live in luxury, and Moragana can finally go find a king who isn't so pig-headed that they can take her good advice.”

“B-but you were trying to enchant the king…take over the kingdom…”

“I just didn't stroke his ego and told him when he was making bad choices.” The witch rolled her eyes. “Anyway, shall we get this over with?”

“Don’t I get a say? I don’t want to be turned into a woman!”

The princess just giggled. “Nope, no say at all. Do it.”

Aldric felt his blood boil; he was not about to let two women just decide his fate! He raised his sword again and levelled it at Moragana. 

“You so much as wiggle your fingers and I’ll slice you in half!” he threatened, “I beat all your creatures, I can beat you.”

“Those spells were paltry.” She yawned, “Little parlour tricks made to inflate the ego of foolish knights. Good to see they worked.”

Aldric felt his stomach drop, and then Moragana’s eyes flashed. His vision blurred, and he staggered back, confused, only to fall on the bed. That wasn't right; the bed hadn’t been that close behind him a moment ago. His vision cleared as his head hit the mattress, and instantly, Aldric could tell something was wrong/ His hips were too high, making his back arch on the bed slightly. His fingers felt smooth against the sheets, and he could feel hair brushing his chin. If that wasn't confusing enough, suddenly his own voice spoke from above him. 

“Wow, it worked!”

Aldric’s hand flew to his throat in shock; he hadn't said anything! So why…and where was his Adam’s apple? He sat up quickly and felt a weight at his chest sag slightly. He looked down, only to see the ample bosom of the well-endowed princess staring back at him. And a few feet away, smiling cockily, was his own face. Morgana smiled and tapped a sharp nail to her cheek.

“Of course it worked, what do you take me for? A common peddler?”

“Oh, this is wonderful!” The princess, in Aldric’s body, cried, “I will take you back in my place, and be rewarded handsomely by my father and get to have my freedom at last! Oh, it will be wonderful to have men actually take me seriously for once.”

She did a little spin only to wobble as the armour clanked.

“Nobody will take a knight spinning on his toes seriously.” Morgana chided, “You have to lose the girly habits.”

“Oh, I’ll be fine.”

Aldric’s mouth opened and closed; even that felt wrong. His lips were too soft and plush. The other two were ignoring him, too excited about their plan. He sat at the edge of the bed, not knowing what to do; all of a sudden, he was a weak, delicate princess! How was he supposed to fight his way out of this situation, even if he did escape the tower? What good would it do him? And there was no way he could threaten Morgana into turning him back; if he couldn’t do it with a sword, he certainly couldn’t do it in a dress. 

Morgana finally looked over at him and laughed. “Stop pouting, you’re about to have an easier life than most people.”

“If it's so wonderful, why does she want to leave?” He countered. 

“Don’t ask me, if I got to sit around all day, doing nothing but looking beautiful, I’d do it.” She shrugged, “Alright, come over here and I shall send you back to the edge of the kingdom. The horse as well.”

The Princess grinned widely and held out a hand, bowing to him. Somehow, she managed to make her body language sarcastic. 

“Milady.”

He considered knocking the hand away, but thought better of it. There was no fighting this, at least not here. Aldric let himself be pulled to his feet only to instantly wobble; he wasn't used to the wide hips or heavy buttocks, not to mention the extra weight at his chest. His dainty feet wobbled like a newborn deer in his fabric shoes, and he fell forward, only for the Princess to catch him. 

“Easy, your majesty, you wouldn’t want to bruise your delicate face on my armour.”

Heat filled my cheeks, and I pushed away; she was a natural. In just a few minutes, she’d managed to be more naturally charming than he ever had. It wasn't fair. She wrapped her now broad arms around him, and Aldric squeaked.

“Hold on tight!” Morgana cackled, flicking her fingers, and a second later, a swirl of magic encompassed them, and they were back at the edge of the forest, castle on the horizon. The princess let him go, and Aldric stomped as dramatically as his long, flowing skirt would allow.

“You seriously think I am going to go along with this?” He said, “I’ll tell everybody what you and Moragan did.”

The princess scoffed and went to cross her arms over her chest, only to have the bulk of her armour get in the way. 

“Listen here,” She said, “If you start ranting and raving, claiming you’re a knight whose traded place, they’re going to think you're crazy. You’ll be confined to your room, to be poked and prodded by healers and mystics for the rest of your life. Is that what you want?”

“No…”

“Then play along, you get to live a life of luxury, and one day you’ll be queen! What more could you want?”
“To be king.”

The former princess snorted, “Sorry, but that was never going to happen. Even if I had been kidnapped.”

Aldric winced as his pride was wounded. 

“Now, you have two options here: resist and make everything worse, or go along with it and enjoy your life as a fair maiden being waited on hand and foot.”

When she said it like that, Aldric had to admit she had a point.

“But I don’t know how to be a princess! Don’t you have lessons on decorum and such?”

“It's easy. I’ll teach you.”

Her large hands held his shoulders and forced his spine straight. 

“Now, shoulders back and stand up straight, walk like you’re trying to float. The dress helps with that since nobody sees your feet, toes first, then heel, and keep your eyes high and your nose in the air. Remember, you’re the most perfect person in the room.”

Aldric felt his cheeks burning with humiliation as he tried to do as she said. He could feel the natural sway of his hips moving the fabric above his butt, and his long hair brushing his back. It all felt so weird.

“No, no, you’re too stiff, let those hips move, it looks weird when you try to walk like a man.”

“It’s the only way I know how to walk!”

“Just let your body do what it wants, it's natural.”

He huffed and tried again. They continued like that for several hours, with the princess explaining formal dining to him, while Aldric salivated. Life in the royal palace sounded so glamorous, an average meal there was better than a feast day, and he had not one, but two personal servants to attend to him at all times. 

“And of course, there is Lisa, the governess. My lessons are mostly complete now, but she will be there helping to prepare you for any balls where potential marriage candidates will be.” 

“Marriage?”

He hadn’t considered that part. Could he marry a man? It didn’t seem like he had much of a choice. 

As they approached the palace, Aldric rode side saddle with the princess’s strong arms around him. The king and queen appeared on an upper balcony and quickly disappeared as the castle crier announced the princess’s return. 

“Won’t you miss your parents?”

“Those fusspots? Not at all. Now, remember, be convincing.”

Aldric swallowed and allowed her to help him off the horse. The queen ran to him, pulling him into an embrace. 

“You’re back, oh, you poor dear, you must have been terrified.”

“S-so scared.” He muttered, mostly out of nerves. 

“The princess took quite a hit to the head; there may be some memory loss.” The Princess told them. Her lying was incredible; Aldric couldn’t help but be impressed. 

He stood, silently watching as the king thanked the brave knight and rewarded him handsomely. For a second, Aldric’s blood burned with jealousy at the rewards, but then he realised…that was nothing compared to the wealth he now owned by blood.  

Servants were suddenly at his side, shaking their heads at the dirt on his skirt and twigs in his long hair. The king clapped his hands.

“The princess has been through quite the ordeal. She must be cared for, and a great feast held to celebrate her return!”

“Good luck, your majesty.” The former princess said, bowing deeply and remounting his old horse. There was a knowing glint in her eye, and Aldric just waved numbly. It was odd, watching his old body ride away, taking his old life with it. 

The servants whisked him away upstairs to the most lavish set of rooms Aldric had ever seen. There was a plush feather down bed, fine wooden furniture, and even a mirror! He’d never even seen one in person before. His maids made quick work of his clothing and drew him a bath that felt heavenly against his soft skin. Steam scented with rose petals brushed against his face as he leaned back, and one of the maids sang softly to him as she washed his hair. Aldric didn't need to lift a finger. 

“Which gown would you like to wear to your celebration dinner?” One of the maids asked. 

Aldric had never had a choice of clothes before, let alone choices so fine. It was either his armour or the simple tunic and pants he’d been patching for years. At first, he felt embarrassed looking at all the ruffles and silks, but the moment that soft fabric touched his delicate skin, he was sold. 

Aldric stood in front of the mirror, letting his maids braid his long red hair and place jewels against his throat. The natural princess walk came easier, now that he was dressed like this; it felt natural to hold his head high and let his hips sway. 

Aldric had never been to a formal before; that was only for high-ranking knights and nobles. He was announced, and the door opened. All inside turned to face him and bowed low. Aldric could feel the eyes on him, especially from the knights at the sides of the room. If he bowed like them, his cleavage would spill right out of his shirt. Luckily, a princess bowed to no one. He felt his lips curl, and he gave the group a soft smile and nod. Their faces flushed, and Aldric felt a surge of power wash over him; they would be arguing all night, trying to figure out which one of them caught his eye. 

His new parents greeted him, and Aldric did his best curtsey before sitting down at the table with them. It was already laden with food, whole suckling pigs, roasted vegetables, white bread, fruit he’d never even heard of. A servant poured him a glass of wine and flushed when he thanked him. Aldric grinned behind his goblet and drank deeply. Perhaps being a princess wouldn’t be so bad after all.