Hot Tub Love Machine - 18
Added 2021-05-10 20:00:04 +0000 UTCHi, if you're not up to date on Hot Tub Love Machine, read the previous chapters here:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1GWUWRgDI1Zh7bnb4EJMgnRKvgdafJoRd?usp=sharing
Thank you all for your support!
Comments
Lucas and Ryan will have to clash over the control and lies at some point. Ray called Ryan "Uncle Ryan" and not "Dad" after all as well.
Neal Johnstone
2021-05-16 00:05:44 +0000 UTCI remember in a previous chapter he asked Ryan if he had sex with his mother. He said he hadn’t and if he had then he and Ray would have been siblings because he had used the potion on Vonnie. Was that all BS from Ryan? I’d suspect it was but I don’t know why, if he was going to BS Jacob any way, why he would mention anything about Ray and Vonnie.
Nick Cartwright
2021-05-15 22:06:14 +0000 UTCI want him to get all the milfs
Nick Cartwright
2021-05-15 22:00:31 +0000 UTCI think I'm gonna write that for Anna, she had an insurance related checkup and got the whole thing done. I just haven't had the time and clarity to fix it yet.
Neal Johnstone
2021-05-13 05:18:59 +0000 UTCWell it’s not the tender satisfying first time I’d pictured for Dawn, but practice makes perfect right. There’s always tomorrow. Lucas’s mom’s vision of his future with just Iggy being one with insufficient sex after a couple of months mostly had me sold. I mean she just wants the best for her son right? All other problems aside, I really think he needs a bigger bed 🛌. This one isn’t nearly big enough. Idk. A player like Emi? If she has a parent who is a doctor or nurse I could really picture it. And Anna as a cheerleader— true or not, seems plausible to me. Maybe monthly as part of intense training and lack of drug based training, could also screen for STDs. Maybe drug test before competitions? Not sure.
HardhatDoozer
2021-05-13 05:13:48 +0000 UTCExcellent, thanks for the feedback!
Neal Johnstone
2021-05-11 12:30:37 +0000 UTCI approached Emi from this point of view; would Kate, who operates a mind controlling hair salon, let Emi bring an STD near her son? So, Emi gets tested. The cheerleader insurance thing... No, the school couldn't legally demand such a thing. Wouldn't be the insurance company either. But I did know a mother of a cheerleader whose daughter competed across national lines (US Canada) and the school pushed quite openly for medical insurance. While in the mandatory doctor's office visit she could've got tested. Or so I inferred out of what the mom said. The daughter would still have confidentiality with the doctor over such things... You're right, I didn't put enough thought into this one. It's a reach for a very specific third party anecdote I never confirmed or busted. I might have to reapproach Anna in that scene. Thanks. I'll go back when I have some free time today.
Neal Johnstone
2021-05-11 12:29:43 +0000 UTCIt was supposed to be off putting but it's also the first time Lucas has seen his mom in this light. Yes, the police would've handled it, true... All I can say to that is: more to come.
Neal Johnstone
2021-05-11 12:17:52 +0000 UTCIf he uses the potion on his own mother (to get back at Ryan or whatever really), you'll be my hero.
nym
2021-05-11 05:34:57 +0000 UTCThe positives of this chapter is I love that he finally took control of the girls and excepted that they are his. I also enjoyed the building of the tension between him and Ryan and Lucas’ determination to get even. I also enjoy the back door into Lucas head. It leaves him vulnerable with a weakness but he already shored it up with some of the girls. That showed it can be countered at least. I am very interested in seeing how he overcomes and stops this kryptonite from being further exploited. On a side note I would love to see Lucas expand to some of the Milfs. (With him mentioning how hot Dawns mom was maybe somethings developing). It would be good if he was open to expanding his harem but unlike Ryan actually took responsibility and care of his women/children. I understand if it not in the cards.
Nick Cartwright
2021-05-11 01:13:54 +0000 UTCDidn’t like the orgy with the parents. Was kind of off putting. I suppose, because Lucas didn’t like it either, it was the catalyst to take full control of the girls. Just hope not to see or hear about anything with Jesse or someone similar again. Also she’s 18. They don’t need Jesse’s permission. They should have just called the police on his ass.
Nick Cartwright
2021-05-11 01:05:50 +0000 UTCWhat 18 yr old in high school gets tested after every new partner? And what 18 yr old would even ask that? A school that makes the cheerleaders get tested? Sounds highly illegal. This whole conversation really broke the immersion for me. P.s. the sex god thing didn’t really make the conversation any more believable for me.
Nick Cartwright
2021-05-11 00:33:17 +0000 UTC
