Happy Birthday, Alice

Today was Alice's birthday, and it was all she could think about.

Quite literally.

The young, onesie-clad woman bounced absently in place on the sofa, her eyes wandering in and out of focus as she gazed vaguely around the living room. Streamers she saw, and balloons. A gaily colored banner cheering out "Happy Birthday!" in the childish round letters of Comic Sans. A stack of brightly wrapped presents heaped in one corner of the room, just waiting for her groping fingers to tear into them and reveal their thrilling secrets…

Her lips suckled greedily on the spout of the flowered sippy cup in her hands, and the waning level of the juice sploshing back and forth inside showed that this birthday girl was certainly a thirsty one. Of course she was. Her partner, aka Mommy, had been introducing her to her sippy cup of juice little by little, more and more: first as a surprising treat, then as a cute and comforting bedtime snack, and most recently as… well, as the default beverage of choice.

Meaning, of course, that she didn't even have to think about it anymore. Which was nice. All she had to do was take what Mommy gave her, and suck the lovely, sugary stuff down…

A muffled burp escaped Alice's lips, and as she resumed her fitful drinking, her eyes were drifted out to the distance, taking on the vague, wondering gaze of a spaced-out toddler. It was a look that was increasingly present on her face these days. At first it had been present when she'd been seated on her partner's lap, gazing grudgingly into the screen-filling, pastel spiral that was intended to help her relax. Then, it had started to surface at other times: moments when she was caught up in her own thoughts, or staring silently out the car window from the buckled-in safety of the back seat where Mommy insisted she sit…

And now? Well… now it and the fuzzy-minded wonderment that came with it – were recurring more frequently than ever.  She didn't know exactly why, of course. But somehow it felt… right. Good. Like she had dreamed about for years. Like being a docile, fuzzy-brained little girl was what she truly deserved.

Even when Mommy strode into the room with a smile, Alice hardly stirred. Her unfocused eyes swiveled slowly up, focusing briefly before the shivery tingle of Mommy's caressing fingers slipping through her hair sent them sliding sleepily closed in an unconscious, almost animal reflex.

"Aww, is your sippy cup almost empty? You're such a thirsty girl today! You really do love your juicy-juice now, don't you?" The amusement in Mommy's condescending tone was palpable, and yet preoccupied and hazy as she now felt, Alice gave hardly a blush. "Now, I bet you'd probably drink even more if I gave it to you, honey, " Mommy continued sweetly, with a smile on her crimson lips. "But we really want to make sure that you save enough room for your birthday cake! Mommy has such a special birthday cake for you, too. It's gonna be so pretty, and yummy…"

Little Alice roused up at that – or tried to, her moist lips remaining parted in inarticulate need as Mommy tugged the now-empty sippy cup from her unwilling hands. "Here, no more juice for now," she murmured, and she suppressed a smile as Alice's thumb rose unconsciously to replace the missing teat. The medicated juice was nothing new, of course. But today's double-strength dose was working faster than she'd expected, clearly. At this rate, it wouldn't be more than an hour before her dear little Alice would be lying limp as a ragdoll: drowsing off into heavy sleep, even as her digestive and renal systems slipped into overdrive…

Which sounded simply perfect, of course. But today was little Alice's birthday, and the surprise Mommy had planned required the birthday girl to at least be awake.

"Let's open some of your presents now, shall we? Go on, baby – go grab one of those pretty presents over there and show Mommy!" Oh, presents were definitely an antidote to sleepiness! Alice nodded and rose from the sofa, crinkling obediently and with brightening eyes over to the stack of presents. A particularly pretty little box caught her attention, and she seized it with eager and sticky fingers, trotting eagerly back to her partner.

"Dis one," she articulated, dropping it in her Mommy's lap and leaning close in eager expectation. "Aww, good job!" Mommy enthused, and Alice squealed and wriggled her visibly padded bum in delight at the commendation. "Here, let's open it together!"

They did. And the present inside – a brand-new, extra-large pacifier with pretty lavender flowers across the shield – was everything a good little birthday girl could have wanted.

"Yay – now another one!" Mommy cheered, even as the Alice – her little squeals of joy now muted by the new pacifier filling her mouth – trotted off once more in search of more. And on it went, as the stack of torn wrapping paper grew and the array of adorable baby accessories and toys was revealed. A touch-and-feel book about animals – a new stuffed pink elephant – a pair of extra-fancy ruffled plastic pants – even an amazing overall romper with "Never Grow Up" stitched in fancy purple lettering across the front.

But unwrapping birthday presents eventually comes to an end, and so does the energy of any birthday girl, no matter how big or small she may be. Mommy knew this well – and as Alice slumped tiredly against her, fingers clutching happily and sleepily at her beloved new elephant, Mommy knew it was time for the finale.

The finale, that is, that she had been working toward for the past year.

"Come on, sweetie – it's cake time!" Mommy enthused, and at the probing touch of her maternal fingers Alice roused up from her slow slide into drowsiness. "Now, I know you're not the neatest eater, honey – and that's okay. But we can't have you making a mess in your best onesie, can we? Here, let's get you out of that." Mommy rose and pulled her close, bending down briskly to undo the snaps at her little one's visibly puffy crotch. "Don't worry! Mommy made the house nice and warm for her little angel…"

Alice shivered as the bunched fabric of her pink onesie slipped over her head, leaving her standing before her Mommy in nothing but the gaily colored, cotton-and-plastic bulk of her princess-covered disposable diaper.

Sure, she'd whined about it at first. She was a big girl, after all – a big girl who just liked cute little things. She didn't really need anything as babyish as diapers, really. But Mommy had been insistent today that she be protected, and of course little Alice had had to comply. Her onesie covered it anyway, she'd reasoned, even as she'd relaxed and let that first burst of urine out between her legs. And just because it really did feel nice when it got all soft and squishy and wet around her smooth-shaven princess parts… well, that didn't mean she needed them, right? She was just doing it for Mommy – playing along – obeying like a good girl should…

Just like the soothing voices in all those pretty movies and songs Mommy played for her. Good little girls obeyed. Good little girls listened to Mommy. Good little girls loved to obey their Mommy.

"Come on – into your high chair, honey!" And into the dining room they went, Alice trotting eagerly along and holding her Mommy's strong hand. The extra-large, custom-built wooden seat they'd gotten for Christmas stood waiting to receive her – and in she went, as Mommy tugged the straps tight and buckled her half-naked birthday girl into place. "There, now. Who's ready for their surprise?" Mommy enthused, plucking the new pacifier from Alice's lips. "Are you ready, baby? Is the birthday girl ready?"

The birthday girl nodded eagerly, her eyes unwilling to leave her Mommy as she strode over to the pantry, lighter in hand, emerging not fifteen seconds later with… the cake. And oh, how Alice's face lit up at the luminous sight!

It was a thing of beauty indeed: all pink and white and lavender, its rainbow glitter and sprinkles and iridescent decorations sparkling in the light of two glowing candles. "Happy Second Birthday, Alice!" cheered the cursive frosting piped right across the front – and though perhaps the birthday girl might at one time have writhed in embarrassment at such a babyish inscription, thanks to the combination of the bubbling joy of her inner little self, the strange haze filling her mind, the echoing voices that seemed to ring in her ears, and the limp torpor that dragged at her limbs and urged her to slump down into sleep… well, all she could do was stare and give an open-mouthed smile of wonder and sleepy joy.

"Here, let's make a wish, honey!"

In Mommy's voice there was the intense, suppressed joy and impatience of an entire year of hard work. How she'd been longing for this day! How she'd worked, and planned, and consulted with specialists on hypnotic training about the best way to give her Little what she'd always fantasized about. How she'd administered the doses: slowly at first, then gradually accustoming her darling partner to stronger and stronger subliminal programming. How she'd planned out even today, doctoring her sweet little Alice's juice with laxatives, and diuretics, and the most delicious combination of muscle relaxants and soporifics. Everything had led up to this day, and now was finally the time when she would see at last whether her tireless efforts would truly pay off.

"Let's make a wish!" Mommy repeated, and her voice vibrated with intense excitement and longing. "Come on, honey! And once you think about your wish, let's blow them out together, okay?"

She knew what her partner's wish had been last year. And although judging by the excited, but spaced-out expression on Alice's face she was in no state to form a coherent wish, it didn't matter. Mommy knew. Mommy understood. And Mommy would grant her that wish…

…in "three… two… ONE!"

Their breaths puffed together as one: the short, unsteady breath of the bare-breasted young woman in her high chair, and the warm, fervent breath of her Mommy bending low over her naked shoulder. And as the candles sputtered out into smokey darkness, Mommy drew a second shaky breath and bent close to Alice's ear, her lips trembling on the magic words.

"It's baby time forever, honey. Baby time forever."

The world swam before Alice's suddenly heavy eyes. Her mind shuddered and faltered to a halt, overwhelmed by the cascade of voices echoing through her consciousness. Her muscles jerked,  twitched, then sagged into limp submission. And from her parted lips emerged a series of protesting grunts and moans that finally trailed off into a wet, burbling string of sleepy babble.

Mommy's hands were shaking as the knife slipped easily down through the pastel wonder before her. Out came a thick wedge of cake, all glitter and frosting and sugary, crumby, delight. And right before the slack-jawed, vacant-eyed Alice she placed it, her fingers trembling as they tightened… squeezed deep into the cakey mass… and drew out a thick, delectable chunk.

"Happy birthday, baby," she murmured, and into her baby's half-open mouth she pressed the sticky handful. Frosting spurted from between her fingers, crumbs and sticky paste smearing easily over and around Alice's face. "Happy birthday to the sweetest-" her fingers slid upward, dragging the sugary mess up and around her cheeks. "Most darling-" Her hand cupped tighter, and Alice let out a cakey, drooly squeal of happiness at the sweetness being forced deep into her mouth. "…most perfect baby girl in all the world."

All that the sticky, frosting-covered Alice could do was let out another muffled squeal of infantile delight… and stare up at her Mommy with innocent, vacant eyes.

It was baby time indeed.