Likeness and Salon 15 details!

Or who do you like liking you.

I was reading Jack Druce’s newsletter last week (sign up for it if you haven’t, and tell him I sent you - he’s a thoughtful delight) and he was talking about being liked, wanting to be liked.

It’s very much part of being a person I think, and certainly of being a performer. There are of course rare exceptions; people who ‘like’ to be hated - but I often feel like that’s just an inverted masochistic version of wanting to be loved.

I have a family friend, a Jewish comedian, whose whole shtick is aggressing people - both on stage and off. He alternates being charming with deliberately trying to insult or provoke his interlocutor or audience members. On stage it comes across as anarchic (somewhat old fashioned) fun and he has a fanbase of people who enjoy it immensely for its edginess.

But although it’s most marked onstage, it’s not just an onstage character. He can’t resist unsettling and upsetting and poking at people. It’s a compulsion. (I once saw him bark at a passing dog). He also, you realise if you ever spend any time talking to him, is completely obsessed with the Holocaust - it plays on his mind constantly. His parents were survivors (it’s how his mother knew my grandmother and our families are aquainted). It occurs in his conversation every three sentences or so.

The Holocaust obsession is relevant context because I think it’s pertinent to his compulsion. To be an armchair psychologist, I think he needs to prove constantly to himself that he won’t be killed. He courts this form of ‘danger’ (being hated) in order to prove that he’s safe. All comedy is that a little bit, to some extent. Proving that you can say unusual or difficult or controversial or silly things, make a fool of yourself, expose yourself to the danger of the mob and then be safe/loved/liked.

As ever, no conclusions, just something I’ve been thinking about.

Anyway, salon 15 is in US time and the details are as follows! I’ll send the password through to the relevant levels about an hour before.

Topic: Tea With Alice Salon 15

Time: Mar 9 08:00 PM Pacific Standard Time / Mar 10, 2021 03:00 PM Canberra, Melbourne, Sydney

link:

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/85744823261?pwd=dGs5YjloaG5jTkV3K085c2VFVnUxUT09

Next week will be an all levels free for all salon. See you!

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