Bachelorette
Added 2024-04-15 06:30:31 +0000 UTCI’m a perpetual bachelor. If a man ever convinces me to cohabitate, he will be made of magic and miracles, because nothing else will get me to live under his roof. I won’t judge you for choosing marriage, but it’s a terrible choice for me. If there’s one thing I value, it’s solitude. I’m fatally introverted, and constant company exhausts me.
I don’t care if a man squeezes from the bottom of the toothpaste tube or leaves hair in the sink because tomorrow he’ll be where he belongs: in his own damn house because that’s how romance thrives.
I want magic in my relationships, and all cohabitation does is create more dishes in the sink, which I, ever the service sub, am more than happy to wash
IF
he goes home on Monday morning.
I want to put Hendrix on full volume. I want to dance all over the house wearing an ugly robe and no makeup with my hair in knots.
I love intimacy as much as the next romantic, but I enjoy it best on finite terms. Holidays or a few months of coexistence are awesome because they end. Too much of anything is… well… too damn much. Not having makes having easier to treasure.
I got engaged once. My fiancé was a carbon copy of me, only without the vagina. We liked the same everything and did the same everything, so living with him was exactly like living alone, only with more sex. I doubt I’ll ever find another one of him, so it’s unlikely I’ll ever cohabitate again.
Love tends to arrive and change commitment of this calibre, and hell, if that happens, I’ll be grateful too. It’ll mean I found more magic and miracles than I thought I would. Until then, I do a brilliant job of creating my own fairy-tale. This space lets the weirdness of me exist in all its glory, in Technicolor, and very, very loudly.
