Sweet Sweet Headlines for Your Posing Pleasure

Hello everyone,

     We hope you all enjoyed Ska day, because of you we were able to get Bill de Blasio to admit his love of ska. Stay tuned for more cool stuff coming. In the mean time here are the headlines up for posing this week. Hard Drive headlines are at the top, email jeremy@thehardtimes.net to claim one. Scroll down to find The Hard Times headlines and email bill@thehardtimes.net to claim yours.

And remember, if you have posed a headline before you can pose one again, just email us and let us know. This is first come first serve, so get in early.

Hard Drive Headlines email jeremy@thehardtimes.net

Olympic Committee to Include 200m Naruto Run at 2020 Games 

DESCRIPTION: Full body image of someone doing Naruto run in front of a blank background. Preferably in running gear.

Sunken-Eyed Community Manager in Dead End Job Totally Hears What You’re Saying, Will Pass It on to Developers 

DESCRIPTION: Tired person at computer

36-Year-Old Gamer Practicing Every Day For Casual Smash Bros Match With Nephew at Family Get Together 

DESCRIPTION: Adult and young kid playing smash bros

Rogue Valve Developer Works on Game 

DESCRIPTION: Programmer coding

Opinion: This Isn't Actually a Spoiler 

DESCRIPTION: Annoying person in conversation

Elite Gaming Keyboard Used to Book Funeral Arrangements 

DESCRIPTION: Person using mechanical keyboard

Real Life Also Harder on Veteran Mode 

DESCRIPTION: Depressed army veteran

Melee Player Can’t Believe Someone Would Just Throw Out Zenith CRT TV With Built-In VHS Player From 2005 

DESCRIPTION: Person with old CRT TV

Bar Fight at Warhammer Convention Enters Third Day  

DESCRIPTION: Nerds arguing in a bar.

Father Surprises Son at School After Playing 'Call of Duty' for 12 Months Straight 

DESCRIPTION: Man hugging son while holding xbox/playstation controller

40-Year-Old Asthmatic IT Analyst Explains Exactly How He Would Take Down Active Shooter In the Office 

DESCRIPTION: Man who looks like they're in their 40s (roughly) in an office.

Natural 20 Wasted On Rogue’s Attempt To Do A Cool Flip 

DESCRIPTION: People/person playing D&D

Man Equips Lvl 4 Gear for Lvl 30 Date

DESCRIPTION: Guy dressed down on his way to a date 

Gamer Who Skipped First Cutscene Pissed He Can’t Follow Story

DESCRIPTION: Someone playing video game upset

Therapist Says Streamer Needs to Subscribe to Himself

DESCRIPTION: Someone talking to therapist

Meet Gary, The First Ever Person to Pay For Photoshop

DESCRIPTION: Guy using PhotoShop

Gamer Parent Calls Every Piece of Son’s Sport Equipment a Nike  

DESCRIPTION: Adult mid-argument holding a piece of sporting equipment (football, soccer ball, etc). Kid in the photo would be extra cool.

Report: 20-Member Group Chat Much Worse in Person

DESCRIPTION: A group of 20 people looking bored.

Dave & Busters Now Provides a Small Child to Stare Silently While You Play Shooters

DESCRIPTION: Someone playing a shooter at Dave and Busters while a child stares at them.

GameStop Employee Worried Middle Aged Woman Is Buying M-Rated Game for Tiny Child Next to Her

DESCRIPTION: Woman buying game at GameStop.

The Hard Times Headlines email bill@thehardtimes. net

Sunburnt Concertgoer Sheds First Skin of Festival Season 

Frontman Takes Bold Stance Against Everything He Will Be Accused Of Next Month 

Son Would Tell Dad He Loves Him But Just Doesn’t Want to Sound Gay Or Anything 

Son Not Sure Where to Look After Hearing “I Love You” From Dad 

World’s Oldest Millennial Dead at 39 

Marijuana User Livid After Finding First Seed in Three Years 

Promising Mosher Out 3-6 Weeks With Torn Vans Sole 

Man You Like Less Than Jeff Trying to Bond Over Some Good Ol’ Fashion Jeff Shit Talk

Roommate Tweeting Elliott Smith Lyrics Probably Gonna Turn Into a Whole Big Thing

Man Fears The Worst After Dad Says “I Love You” for the First Time Ever 

Man Just Doing Everything On Acid Until VICE Decides to Pay Him For It 

Dead Kid Would’ve Hated Winner of His Memorial Scholarship 

Drummer of Band Going On Acoustic Tour Guesses He’ll Just Go Fuck Himself 

Loose Collection of Shitty Musicians and Drug Addicts Keep Referring To Themselves as “The Scene” For Some Reason 

Anarchist Bookstore Unsure What to Do After Robbery 

Punk Returning From Semester Abroad Now Spells It “Poseur” 

Friendless Guitarist Asks Sweetwater Rep To Be Best Man 

Guy Resists Urge to Relax and Study at Lo-Fi Chillhop Concert 

Man wondering why you only watched parts 1-23 of his 74 part Insta story 

Guy Unsure How to Ask New Job If They Drug Test 

Pop Punk Vocalist Scours Teen Girlfriend's Diary For Lyric Ideas 

Stoner Pretty Sure He Just Invented CBD-Infused Marijuana 

Local Scene Emerges Around Teen with Biggest Basement, Worst Parents 

Worst Political Facebook Rant In History Leaves 10 Unfriended, 37 Unfollowed 

Tour Manager Fired for Embezzling Drink Tickets 

Drive To Baltimore Just Long Enough to Enable Wrong Friend Getting Turn With AUX Cord 

Coward Musician Puts Title Track First 

Martial Artist Goes to Show Searching for Crowdkiller Who Murdered His Master 

Dog Most Productive Member Of Punk House 

Hardcore Band Called Out for Not Wiping Down Equipment After Set

Man Substitutes Sleeping Pills With Paragraph of Friends “No Holds Barred” Political Zine 

Report: Girlfriend Just Thinks It’s Kinda Funny You Liked That Picture 

Dad Breaks 1,024 Day-Long Social Media Silence by Posting “Outback Steakhouse Near Me” to Facebook

Lighter Doubling As Bottle Opener Also Tripling As Man’s Only Party Trick 

Search History Repeats Itself 

Girl Wearing NASA T-Shirt Has Never Even Been To Space 

Punk Has Heard of Father But Never Seen Him Live

Helicopter Mom Really Enjoying Tour So Far

New California Law Bans "High Capacity" Zines Capable of Reaching More Than Ten People 

Undercover Cop Having Terrible Time at DIY Folk Punk Festival 

Man Asks Record Store Employee If They Validate Opinions

Violent, Rage-Filled Incel Turns 15 

Man Keeps Car Visor CD Sleeve Full In Case Of Emergency 

Kid Windmilling in Pit Tilted by Old Man on Horse 

Guy Alone at Show Stoked to See Long Line at Bathroom 

Overly Polite Frontman Wants to Know How You Are Doing Tonight, If You Need Water, If You Are Liking New Job

Haircut Noticed

Heavily Tattooed Band Tired of Being Asked if They are Chefs

Punk Upset Constant Anti-Capitalism Rants Result in Third Consecutive Birthday with No Gifts

“Merch Guy” Dreams Of Being Promoted To “Occasional Guest Vocalist”