Dear Mr. Fix-it: Getting Noticed by Blake

Dear Mr. Fix-it,

I know you usually give advice on how to repair radios or lawn mowers or loose gutters, but I’ve got a situation that’s a little more complicated. You see there’s this guy at work – his name’s Blake – and he’s really hot. He’s tall and built and has got a killer smile. And from what I can tell, he’s really smart, too. The problem is that he only seems to look at other big jocks, and, well, that’s not me. I’m 6’1” but only weigh 140 pounds – lanky is about the kindest word you could use to describe me. Just all skin and bones.

Can you “fix” me so that I catch Blake’s eye?

Signed,

So Terribly Under Developed

Dear S.T.U.D.,

You know my saying – “Everything can be fixed” – and I do mean everything! Let me see what I can find out when I do a deep dive into your background….give me a minute here.  OK, I think I figured out what needs to be done. Back when you were a freshman in college, your roommate Mike asked if you wanted to go to the gym with him, but you were too tired. So he went alone and never asked again. I’m just going to switch your answer from “Nah, I’m too tired,” to “Let’s give it a try.”

OK, done. You should start looking a little different due to that change. That first workout with Mike was mind-blowing for you – you LOVED feeling the blood pumping through your body, and it gave you a huge erection, too. After that, you were hooked on the gym, and you started going six days a week. 

Looks like the rest of your freshman year was filled with workouts, creatine, protein powder, and…oh, hey, lots of sex with Mike. Nice! That first year alone you put on 25 pounds of muscle, and you started filling out your clothes really well – everything was TIGHT! Looks like sophomore year it was another 15 pounds of muscle, and then another 15 in both your junior and senior years, so you graduated college at 210 pounds of solid beef. 

By then you were completely obsessed with getting enormous, so you kept up the intensity for the next few years. More weights, more protein, and it looks like some HGH as well. All that training brought you up to 275 pounds of jacked muscle, so nobody’s calling you lanky anymore, that’s for sure!  

And you got bigger and beefier in all the right places – those 22-inch arms and 60-inch chest have been turning a lot of heads, including Blake’s. And, what do you know, it looks like you two are a couple now. He noticed you on your first day on the job and immediately started fantasizing about getting his hands on those meaty thighs and the bulge in-between.  He didn’t even wait 5 minutes before flirting, and you guys had your first date, and sex, that very night. Man, you two really went at each other – you used up two whole bottles of lube! That explains why you were both late for work the next morning. 

Blake really gets off on your size and strength – he practically cums every time you curl 225 pounds – and fantasizes all the time about how big you will be by the time you're married to one another.

Looks like everything is fixed for you now, S.T.U.D.!

Sincerely,

Mr. Fix-it