Chewing the Fat: NadyaBBW

Chewing the Fat:

with NadyaBBW

A fab-to-flab confab with the BBW queen and former string bean about how the naughty hottie ruined her body

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If there were a gainer Hall of Fame, and there should be, NadyaBBW would be a first-ballot, inaugural-class shoe-in.  She embodies (as in bodies plural) the gluttonous zeal for fattening we love and—like any worthy Hall of Famer—is willing to sacrifice her body in order to overachieve.  Of course, while most Hall of Famers strive to break old records or new ground, Nadya’s goal is to break beds and scales!  It’s an admittedly unhealthy obsession, but that’s what sets her apart.  We’ve watched plenty of pretty gals plump up through the years, some quite actively, but for most gainers complete immobility is a rickety bridge too far.  It’s a bridge Nadya plans to cross…at least until she’s too fat to move or it collapses under her weight. 

As you’ll read in our eye-opening (and seam-busting) interview, the blimping BBW considers either outcome a win-win!

Mavrip: Anyone who's seen your videos knows that gaining isn't something you just fell into for a quick bit of fun and profit. I think why you’re on the Mt. Rushmore of gainers for so many people, myself included, is the reckless abandon in which you gave into your gluttony.  Certainly, it wasn't a switch that flipped overnight although it seemed like it. What events led to your decision to gain 'whole hog'? 

Nadya: First off, thank you so much! I really appreciate the opportunity to really break down the nitty-gritty of what goes on in my smut brain.

I've always gotten aroused by the feeling of my belly swelling due to food, liquid, inflation, and so on, but seeing the stretch marks appear and outgrowing my clothes sent me into full glutton mode. It feels like I’m wearing a permanent medal to show off the damage I've done to my body.

I think that's why I spent my earlier years so active. I did many sports and went to the gym daily. Deep down, I knew if I went down the gaining path, there would be no turning back. When I commit to something, I go "all out," and I knew this would be no exception.

Mavrip: So, you dabbled with stuffing before you committed to gaining? 

Nadya: Right.  Stuffing myself was always exotic, but stuffing myself with the intention of gaining weight gave me a high like I've never had before. I'll never forget my first time completely "pigging out" with the intention of gaining weight. Knowing that I wouldn't be going to the gym to burn off my cheat meal.  Intentionally trying to eat more and more. Setting new standards for myself. Eating the same meal multiple times a week to make sure I eat bigger portions each time. Doing things like that really conditioned me from going from a stuffer to a gainer.

Mavrip: I’m sure you didn’t shout the transition from the rooftops, but when you stuff yourself silly and no longer fast or exercise to mitigate it, it probably wasn’t long before it became public knowledge.  How did you reconcile that?

Nadya: Seeing my friends and family react to my weight gain only fueled me to keep going because it was confirmation that my hard work was paying off. I am not shy about public humiliation. With the weight gain, I have received more stares and gawks in public than I can count. I may or may not egg this on when I'm wearing crop tops, shorts two sizes too small, burping, etc., but seeing the reactions get increasingly more disgusted the bigger I got really got me off early in my journey. 

Mavrip: Some gainers have figures that easily accommodate pounds as if they were destined to be big. I feel like the opposite may have been true for you. Are you--were you--naturally petite?  Was it a struggle to condition your body to be so...out of condition?  

Nadya: You are 100% correct!  I am naturally petite all around. My body works against me constantly. My friends always used to ask how I could eat so much and not gain a pound. They'd joke that one day all the overeating would catch up to me. I kid you not, one time during a sleepover I polished off an entire box of Entenmann's frosted chocolate-dipped cookies and I still remained the skinniest among my girlfriends.

Mavrip: I’m sure they were jealous…at least until all that overeating DID catch up with you. 

Nadya: I suppose I was the “average” woman's dream, but it certainly wasn’t mine.  When I was skinny, I'd look at pictures of my face and think the shape resembled an alien's face. I hated my collarbones. I remember a guy tried to give me a compliment and told me I had the smallest arms he had ever seen. I was horrified.

Mavrip: It sounds like you struggled with your self-image and your weight just like many women, but in your personal battle of the bulge, you were on the side of the bulge.  Did your stubborn genetics ever make you consider giving up the fight? 

Nadya: Ironically enough, I always think to myself, hmmm, what if there was a magic pill that would make me immobile overnight? Would I take it? And I come to the same conclusion every time. I wouldn’t. Why? Because I love the journey. I love seeing the number on the scale creeping higher. Counting how many steps I can take before I need to stop and catch my breath. I celebrate each milestone and it keeps me eager to push myself harder.

Mavrip: Is it still a struggle after years of purposeful gaining?  Or have you finally battered your body into submission?  

Nadya: It's still a struggle. I used to rely on an app to count every single calorie going into my body. Over time, I learned "hacks" to make recipes more fattening. When I was skinny, I also tracked calories, for an entirely different reason, of course!   (Nadya laughs.)  But keeping up with that habit made the transition much easier. Now I don't track calories too much because I generally know the amount of calories I'm consuming. I went from having to Google the most fattening thing on a specific menu to being able to recite it in my sleep.

Sadly, I'm cursed with a fast metabolism. I'm constantly experimenting with different eating times, sizes, etc., to maximize my meals. I find waking up in the middle of the night to eat something heavy or chug a shake starts my day off with a good bloat.  What can I say?  It’s a labor of love!   

Mavrip: Although I doubt anyone, even the darkest fetishists among us, wishes you ill health or ruin, the way you allude to it in many of your videos is hot. Whenever you self-deprecatingly refer to yourself as a "pig" or a "slob" or lament "ruining your perfect figure," it lets us off the hook for thinking it! Does the ruination angle of feederism turn you on as much as it does most of us here? Or is it more a case of roleplaying for your audience?

Nadya: For me personally, humiliation and my dark fetishes go hand in hand. If I could tattoo "sick fuck" on my forehead, I would. That's exactly why I take immense pride in my gain. It shows people what I'm purposefully doing to myself. And it sends me to Horny Land knowing a stranger on the street and someone watching my clips has the same thought--what a pathetic slob! That's the message I like to convey not just in my online persona but in my personal life as well. There's no disguising what I'm doing to my body; I physically have to show it. In the beginning, I was nervous to tell my loved ones I was doing it "intentionally," but you can't hide it. When I claimed I'd go back to the gym, then be 20+ lbs heavier the next time they saw me, it was obvious what I was doing.

Mavrip: So, in your mind, being the butt of derogatory comments—either received from others or of your own accord—isn’t derogatory at all.  They’re merely acknowledging your handiwork.

Nadya: Terms like "disgusting," "sloppy," "hopeless," etc., are titles I don't take lightly. In my mind, I don't get to call myself a greedy hog for eating seconds. Or thirds. No, I must earn it. Earn it by eating until I feel like exploding. Eating until my body can no longer handle what my mind has driven it to. There is no guide—yet--on how to reach bedbound status, so it's something I have to push for every day. I find role-playing as immobile does help to bring the fantasy to life.

Mavrip: (Laughs) Maybe you’ll write that guide someday?  I’d certainly read it and I suspect a surprising number of others would, too.   

Nadya: At first, I was too shy to even talk about it. Borderline embarrassed. It's very comforting to know there is a community of like-minded people within this niche. It's really my motivator. I love being able to bring my fantasy to life, and it warms my fat-deposited heart to know I'm also bringing others' fantasies to life as well.

Mavrip:  Speaking of “fat-deposited hearts,” health-related complications from gaining are always a touchy subject. Some gaining enthusiasts prefer not to consider the consequences, but if you gain an extreme amount of weight in a short time, I expect some are inevitable. As someone who's openly discussed the allure of extreme feederism (immobility, ruination, etc.) what are your thoughts? Do you try to stay as healthy as possible under the circumstances? Or do you consider failing health a darkly erotic extension of growing so out of shape?

Nadya: As someone who often masturbates to the x-rays of obese individuals and news articles about what fat does to the body, specifically organs, need I elaborate more?  (Nadya laughs.)

Mavrip: Wow! 

Nadya: Look, I totally understand why it isn't everybody's cup of tea, but that’s what makes the dark extension ten times hotter to me. Every time I gain x amount of pounds, I Google what that looks like on a scale. Lately, my fixation has been images of fat. Literal fat. Knowing fat takes up more space than muscle, increases risks of heart disease, kidney disease, strokes, etc….well…that really makes me want some milkshakes right now! When I say I crave more fat in my body, I imagine actual fat being stuffed inside me and how it would look from the inside. And especially what it would do to my blood work. Feeling the weight of what I'm doing is one thing but seeing it in numbers makes it real.

Mavrip: That gratuitous gluttony, coupled with your devil-may-care attitude, is why you’re at the top of the fat heap for so many of us.

Nadya: If I tried to gain in a healthy way, it would also take away all the fun for me personally. I don't think I would have gotten nearly this far if I was on the mild spectrum of things. If I'm going to eat a burger, I want it to be the most fattening burger I can get. When I'm hydrating myself, why choose water, lemonade, or diet soda when I can choose Boost, heavy cream, melted ice cream, and so on? I want to be filled with food that embodies greed. Not apples and bananas. This is just how my brain is wired. No point in trying to suppress it because the urge will still be there. 

It's like eating something others find disgusting. Everyone stares in horror as you polish off a plate of escargot, but you're in heaven. It's not something for everyone to enjoy.

Mavrip: Most folks in the feedism scene enjoy comparisons that showcase the transformational nature of weight gain. Heck, even folks ostensibly not "into" feedism seem fascinated by such stuff for one reason or another. Obviously, you were quite slim and shapely not so long ago. These days...not so much.  You mentioned that the reactions of friends and family helped to fuel your gain.  Are there any juicy anecdotes you can share?  Relatedly, are there particular physical or social dynamics in your relationships that you've noticed have changed, then-versus-now, as you progressed from what many might call a "conventionally hot babe" to "a bit of a blimp?"

Nadya: Of course!  As far as family goes, the reaction is absolute shock. Nobody thought I'd actually do this to myself. I was very transparent from the jump, but saying it and doing it are definitely two different things. Some reactions are more harsh than others, but that's what makes the journey so thrilling. Hell, I even get agitated if my weight isn't brought up. I use it as a progress benchmark.

Mavrip: What about friends?

Nadya: I've noticed as feedism has gone more "mainstream" in recent years, more people are stumbling upon it on social media…including a lot of my friends. It doesn't help that the feedist media going viral is the most shocking, but hey, that applies to media in general. That being said, I've noticed a change in reactions over the years with the recent uptick in popularity. It went from friends seeing it as something taboo and kinky to something that could be dangerous. So their mild concerns have increased to sheer terror!  (Nadya laughs.) 

One thing that remains consistent is curiosity. Everyone asks me why I'm doing what I do. I've had friends even suggest I just consume the porn and not create it myself. And these are all good questions and concerns. They've had to adapt with me as I do not have the energy I used to. This means more chill hangouts, no more clubbing, etc. It's a total lifestyle change.

Recently, I had seen a friend whom I haven't seen in over a year. Her reaction was less than pleased. You'll get a kick out of this. She's getting married and is freaking out over our old peers seeing me so huge. Mind you, I haven't seen some of these people in 10+ years, so I'm personally extremely excited to see the reactions. Unfortunately, she does not share this joy. But my calendar is marked!