Lily Mirai

Quarantine for a shut-in - Blog #1

Added 2020-06-29 23:49:35 +0000 UTC

Hey there!

If you're reading this you probably know who I am (since these blogs are in a paywalled Patreon, whoops), but since this is the first blog entry I'm writing I feel like I should introduce myself!

I'm Lily Mirai, I'm a 23 years old trans woman, artist and student from Chile, I'm currently in college for a degree in Programming! I'm really into tea, coffee, cooking, organization, habits, art and music! You either probably know me for my art, but I've also got recognized once or twice from being the voicer and creator for the UTAUs Etsuko Hoshi and Hoshi (and Kanjoko, who I don't remember fondly, lol) and once from my old studygram/studyblr (cute "aesthetic" pictures from cute notes taken in class and from study sessions, pretty niche, huh? If you go deep enough on my Instagram they're still there! 👀) so I think I should include it here, I still really like that kind of stuff.

Right now this blog doesn't have a defined structure or goals, but it's mostly to share stuff out and interact with my Patrons more! With that out of the way I think I can get into today's blog!

Chile's been awful at managing a quarantine, and even though my city didn't get into quarantine for the first time the 4th of May my roommates, friends and I were already trying to stay inside as much as possible and social distancing (apart from my roommates, I haven't seen my friends in ages, I miss them lots), at the start of our self-quarantining I though it would be easy, I was already kind of a shut-in, I already was doing the most to not go outside, the exceptions where exercising (I really like jogging), some walks I took during the afternoon with a podcast or audiobook to get a boost of energy, and trips to the supermarket or markets around the neighborhood.

I don't know if I'm actually agoraphobic, but I do kinda fear going outside, at the place I currently live right now I've mostly had a safe time, I'm friends with the people at the bakery and small stores, and they make me feel really safe, which is nice, and I haven't ran into any... well, "situations" for being trans around my neighborhood, but I have run into plenty into other parts of the city, so... I mostly exist in the area between my apartment, the bakery, a minimarket and the supermarket. Everything outside of that makes me stay hyper aware of my sorrounding and I cannot relax, so I've mostly stayed inside for a lot of my life.

With this in mind I thought that quarantining woudl be easy, and it was in the beginning. I'm a huge introvert and this is giving me the space to be getting all this job done, so it's almost even motivating at the start, but the weeks start go on and suddenly you notice how long it's been since you've watched the sunset after going for a bakery run, or went for a walk and going to that park and sitting on the swings, and then I notice I'm finding myself gazing through the window next to my desk into the city even more times than usual.

Then I found myself watching too much YouTube and playing League of Legends hoping that time could go by quickly, and then I noticed that by doing those things I wasn't drawing enough or even eating properly, I ate so much simple, frozen cheap foods during the first part of quarantine that I still feel guilty about it.

After I noticed how guilty I felt about not working enough, eating like shit and passing the time playing videogames, I started binging videos about productivity, self care and recipes, and after two weeks of mostly just consuming that content, I started putting it into action. Right now I'm two months into scheduling my days the night before, eating different stuff for cheaper, healthier and I even got out of drinking energy drinks, I wouldn't say I was addicted to them, but after going days without drinking them I felt the push to that fizzy sugar, so it was a unnecessary and expensive waste of money. I'm really happy to have stopped drinking them.

While I haven't been following every single step of my schedule, it's been essential to starting a day and knowing inmediately that I've got stuff to do while my motivation is still high, I've been mostly doing all morning activities I plan plus the early afternoon ones, but after 3-4pm I start being too tired to follow it, these last days I've been trying to implement naps to try and get out of that with no success, these last two nights I've been going to sleep at 2-3am instead of my usual 11pm, so I've got to try that out again with more care and hope that I don't create another problem instead, hahaha~

Also I've been getting hardcore into cooking again, lately I've been roasting potatoes, frying fish properly, learning more stuff to do with chicken breasts, learning pasta recipes and even baking my own bread! The happiest part of all of this is that I'm saving TONS of money on food now, while the frozen cheap solutions were, well, cheap, with the cost of building a decently sized arsenal of spices now EVERYTHING IS SUPER TASTY! Even my old staples are getting new life from all the spices I've been learning to use, and knowning your way around spices means that you don't need to waste much money on the food itself to have a good tasting meal, as it is with easy to cook/filled with fat stuff I used to eat.

As of today, I'm coming out of a four day long streak of sticking stricly to my schedule and I'm super tired and trying to relax and get back into shape, I'm listening to music (i'll link the playlist I'm currently listening to at the end), writing this blog and after meditating (which I haved noted as my next task on my schedule), I'll go bake a batch of bread, it's getting better every time and the savings are super noticeable, so maybe one day I'll do a blog on baking bread? Do tell me if you'd like reading that!

I think I'm going to end this one here, I feel like I could actually continue for a while, but I'd prefer not throwing everything into a massive first entry and not know what to talk about after so, thanks for reading! What have you been up to? I'd love to listen to suggestion on anything!