Dragged Tots

Hello and a good Saturday to you all, Patrons! I’m in the middle of paper writing (they’re due on Wednesday oop eek wow bam boom donkey noise!) and have taken a weeeeeelcome break to watch and repot on this weeks Drag Race All Stars episode! It’s all about balance (procrastination), kids!

We start with the sad loss of Pandora Boxx and the inspiring attitude of TKB! Can we bottle up that seemingly mature ability of her to take the positive out of a negative situation and really indulge in her worth in the competition overall?? If so, I’d like 6 cases, please!

Now we’re down to our top 5! The mini challenge is All Stars Class Superlatives! This definitely won't fuck with their fragile psychological state whatsoever...fun! Turns out Kylie gets all the sugary boyfriends and girlfriends and Eureka should see a gastroenterologist! Ru sneaks in a shady question about who should go home and in the end Ginger and Kylie are the winners. Which means nothing other than they win some money from some sponsor.

This weeks maxi challenge is creating a character that mingles with the Drag Tots…which is apparently a cartoon for kids of all ages and I’ve never ever heard about it but HOW FREAKING CUTE!??! This is a cute challenge! CUTE! I think it's cute.

They get to work on their characters and TKB and Eureka have a sweet heart to heart in the werkroom about the results of the mini challenge. TKB is emotional about being called the moodiest queen (lol!) and Eureka tries to talk her out of falling into her own rabbit hole of doubt. Again, can we bottle Eureka's pep talk energy? I'll take 6 more cases!

The queens have their Ru talks about their ideas for their characters and ONCE AGAIN poor Ra’jah’s idea is immediately shot down and ridiculed. Queen Seeme (semen?) might have to see herself out for the moment. After every queen other than Ginger has some version of a meltdown it’s elimination day and they all seem WORN OUT. Lol. Poor things! I honestly can't imagine how exhausting this whole competition is. Woof. 

As they're getting ready Ra’jah tells us a hilarious story of stealing her grandfathers porn and struggling to rewind the tapes. God, I hope Jan’s grandma is currently writing a letter about that one!

On the runway Ru looks like she’s at a Dolly convention and Michelle looks like a human Hot Topic. Cute! Also apparently Charlie XCX is there who I definitely thought was Rebecca Black and still aren’t fully convinced it’s not.

Then we have the drag tots in the audience! Which is cute and confusing but makes me wish I was watching this with an edible moving through me instead of  a cup of coffee surging in my guts.

TKB: Furry playing lazer tag

Ginger: that blue dress is so impressive! Very true to her brand/character...she's doing what I would expect her to do 

Ra’jah: I love the purple! And I love the googley eyes on the hands…I wish she had some on her butt when she walks away? Is that weird to say?

Eureka: her magic power is gas…I love it…I feel that on a spiritual level 

Kylie: She always looks gorgeous ...but, where’s her drag bag? I love the look but the spider on the hat made it a liiiittle too Halloweeny for me? Not as bad as her panic made me think it would be but I don’t know if it was as good as the other queens? 

I think everyone did great! There weren’t any train wrecks! Which I love! I love when trains stay on their tracks, even if some trains have more gas than others. And seems like the judges agree. This is a tough group!

Buttttttt, Ra’jah is the winner! Ohhh mah gaaahd! I wasn’t expecting that! But so happy for her! And everyone else is in the bottom …. OH MAH GAAAHHHHD.

This week’s lip sync assassin is Kameron Michaels! Ohhhhhh this is gonna be good! And it’s a Rebecca Black...errr...Charlie XCX song! Is Ra’jah phoning it in? I can’t tell? TBH I might do that if I was in her position - it’s TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO CHOOSE at this point in the game. And just like that, boom clap, Kameron is the winner!

The group chooses Eureka to get the chop! Which feels like the safest way to go if it’s based on only track record of wins? I guess I'd go that route if I was in their shoes. It feels too shady to go the ruthless route at this point? And we all know DragRace fans are NASTY with their opinions on it. But I am curious who Ra'jah chose!

 Before Eureka can even pack up her potato shoes she gets a cryptic Ru message telling her to get ready to go back on the MainStage for the lip sync of her LIFE! Is this the game within a game? Is it just a lip sync battle royale? If that’s the case I’ll be a little disappointed BUT looks like we’ll have to wait until next week to find out! FINALLY and sheesh. Good lord have they been dragging this out!

Speaking of dragging out an idea, I gotta get back to my papers! What’d you think of this weeks episode? I’m happy for Ra’jah but I don’t know who to root for now that we have the game within a game to strap in for next week! Who are y’all rooting for? What do you think the actual GWAG is? Enjoy your weekends!! ❤️G