TGIF, Patrons! How are we all doing?! My allergies are going absolutely nuts so I feel like my face is one big wet overstuffed, itchy pillow. SO CUTE! Anyway, it's been a second since I've been able to give you guys a full All Stars recap, but let's get into episode 7!
We start our episode mourning the loss of miss ass almighty, A’keria, after Kylie won the lip sync. It’s hard to compete with someone who can do backhand springs in 8 inch heels without a single titty popping out. She also promised her dog before she left that she’d buy them a house and honestly that’s a promise I can fully respect.
At this point out of the remaining 7 queens Pandora and Eureka are the only ones that haven’t won a challenge. Pandora hasn’t faltered, but she also hasn’t made her presence fully known…which I can also respect bc these queens are loud and gorgeously intimidating. BUT C’MON, PANDORA, WHAT’S IN THAT BOX!?
It’s a new day in the werkroom and Ru walks in looking like, and I don’t wanna say this but, the inside of a streaky toilet after a drunk Taco Bell night… I TOLD YOU I DIDN’T WANT TO SAY IT. But, like, in a really chic way.
This week’s maxi challenge is to write and perform an uplifting drag anthem called “Show Up Queen”. Team captains are Ra’jah and Kylie. After Pandora gets awkwardly picked last they split teams off into Kyle, Ginger and Eureka vs Ra’jah, Jan, TKB and Pandora. Iiiiiinteresting.
The queens get a chance to write lyrics that offer the same features as a good bra: support, confidence and maybe even some good closure.
We get to the recordings and Ginger does a classic great Ginger job (she really does settle the stomach), Kylie kills is, Ra’jah comes through, TKB (wearing a parachute she jumped out of a plane with earlier?) gets her message through, and sweet Jan spends her verse defending her own high energy (lol face palm).
Time to choreograph! TKB is the choreographer and Pandora seems to continue to dim her own light. AHHHH! You can tell she’s just falling further and further down her own rabbit hole and I wanna grab that Alice and pull her back up and tell her she’s great! Then they have her dance solo and wow it’s like looking into a mirror for me. 100% OF MY DANCING IS ALSO BOUNCING AND POINTING LOL.
Kylie’s team tries to democratize their choreography and it’s a bit of a mess. It’s 4 counts of a mess!
It’s elimination day!
We learn that Jan’s grandma is as aggressive as Jan and wrote a letter to RuPaul after Jan got voted off - WOW would I like to read that letter!! And then, so sweetly, Pandora’s team checks in on her while they’re all getting ready and it melts my heart because you can tell she’s uncomfortable with affection and attention. D’aw!
It’s runway time and Ru is wearing a dress that looks like the Pinterest vision board for the inside of my home. CUTE.
Performance time!
Has Jan worn that performance outfit before? Or maybe some variation of it?
Pandora does a version of the song she did in the first challenge but it still feels flat to me.
Ra'jah and TKB kill it
Eureka’s lyrics were GREAT! And that split!
So were Ginger’s!
Kylie was great!
I don’t know if it was the lights or cameras but I thought they did great! That was SO MUCH MORE choreography to memorize than what the rehearsal let on SHIT GOD DAMN.
Runway: Hot Tropics
Jan: Truly J lo meets real housewife of Jersey/Dallas
Pandora: Cute, but I feel like we’ve seen this type of look from her already
Ra’jah: Wow! Itsy bitsy teeny weenie pattern clash bikini! She looked greeeeat
TKB: “I ain’t never been in Brazil, but I brought Brazil to the stage” lololol she looks INCREDIBLE how do you follow that?? And how did she pack that in her suitcase!?
Eureka: Beach Ball bathing suit is cute but following TKB it seems so basic
Ginger: uh oh her and Jan have the same look??
Kylie: Vegas meets Hawaii
Ru telling Jan her performance lacked soul I thought she was going to face crack into a billion pieces.
TKB is the winner! And officially a front runner! And Pandora and Jan are in the bottom. Pandora finally shows some emotion backstage about how she wishes she would have opened up and it’s heartbreaking to watch. It also doesn’t give Jan much room to be the cryer…womp womp.
TKB has a touch decision! Meanwhile, the lip sync assassin is Alexis Mateo, BAM. They lip sync to J Lo’s Dance Again and WOW ARE THEY DANCING AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN UNTIL TKB’S WIG FALLS OFF! But she keeps going and honestly doesn’t look bad. But Alexis Mateo wins and the queens vote off Pandora. BUT WAIT….IT’S A TIE!!!! What the hell happens now?! It’s up to TKB! Oh shit! Drama! Or as TKB said “there’s some good shit here” ha! TKB chooses JAN! Can you hear Jan’s grandmom getting her letterhead out?? But TKB gives Jan some INCREDIBLY sweet words to stay on 110. What a class act.
Whew! What an episode! Pandora seems reluctant to be there, but I’m hoping her breakdown backstage lightened her mental load and maybe she will open up and light a fire under her classy, shy, demure ass!!! What do you guys think?? Who are your front runners? I’ve been rooting for TKB this whole time and now I’m even more of a fan, but I’m interested to see what Ginger can do…and if Pandora has anything to show us. Also when are we getting this damn game within a game!??! Let me know what y’all thought and I hope you have great weekends!! ❤️G
Sawyer Hope
2021-08-03 16:59:36 +0000 UTCLaura Parrish
2021-07-31 11:37:06 +0000 UTCKaris Gorst
2021-07-31 10:13:22 +0000 UTCBen Schonhorn
2021-07-31 02:07:47 +0000 UTCBen Schonhorn
2021-07-31 02:04:27 +0000 UTC