Pausing billing, old stories, and a little break

Hiya everyone,

I decided to pause billing for the month (and, potentially, a bit longer; I haven't decided). Don't worry, I'm not planning on stopping writing for good. In fact, I'll still be writing during the break, just not posting it (probably). Whatever I'm writing, it'll be something new.

I've been stressing myself out about finishing both Second Base and Connecticut Winters. They're stories that mean a lot to me. I want to finish them. And I know people enjoy them. But in the time since I started them, I've grown as a writer, both in terms of prose and general storytelling (at least I hope), and I've really struggled to write any more chapters of them. It's just funny, because I could write 10k of Bottle Blondes in a weekend. I don't know if my brain could even get 10k of Second Base onto the page.

They both were written before I had anyone reading them. They were sort of just... put out there. Void posting, mostly. I'd write them after a couple of drinks and post without editing. There are scenes I don't love. Arcs double over each other. And they have wonderful, solid bones, but I just have been spinning my wheels trying to want to write them for a long while now. It feels like a chore, and writing hasn't been like that for me. Those stories weren't when I started. Under Stagelights wasn't. Bottle Blondes wasn't.

I think someday I'll come back to them. But I'm not going to promise it. My hope is that, by letting myself off the hook for finishing them, it'll let them breathe, and let me lean back in when I feel like they mean something again.

Now, the break. I want to make sure whatever I write next sticks to me in the same way Bottle Blondes did. Which means I want to be able to write things and dump them without thinking about it. Which means I need to not be posting for a little bit. I know this is sort of antithetical to the whole idea of a Patreon, but I think, maybe, it'll still work. When I have something fresh to show you, I'll make a little announcement so you can decide if you want to stick around when I turn back on billing.

I hope none of this comes off as ungrateful. I've been very touched by how many people have wanted to support my writing. And I'm very sorry that those stories will be left unfinished. It's just been a kind of mentally overwhelming that I wasn't expecting. For me, and because I want to keep writing and keep loving it, I think I just need to pause things for now. I'm still going to do bits of editing in the meantime, and I want to get that Stagelights epub up here, but it'll mostly be quiet on the Rhiannon front.

Thanks and love always.