Living the dream

He had the same dream every night.

Honestly, he considered himself pretty lucky. With everything he’d seen in his life, he could have been dreaming about far worse things. About friends being dragged through dark portals, being unable to reach them in time. About people struck by bullets, and the horrifying realisation that their quirk was disappearing. About people slowly crumbling into dust, their screams echoing through the streets as they blew away in the wind, never to be seen again.

All in all, he was very, very lucky that those moments weren’t what haunted his dreams.

Instead Izuku spent every night watching what he liked to think was another dimension – an alternate world, where he and Kacchan woke up together every morning. It was the same dream every time, and it felt like a warm blanket wrapping around his shoulders, like he was coming home to a world where everything was just... Right.

He walked into the kitchen, hearing the faint sounds of a sizzling pan and a quiet humming going on inside. At the counter stood Katsuki – tall, handsome, and smiling to himself as he stirred scrambled eggs in a hot pan.

“Are you cooking me breakfast?” he asked, grinning. “Kacchan, that’s so thoughtful!”

“Sit your little butt down,” Katsuki answered, flashing him a smile over his shoulder. “I ain’t gonna be responsible for a villain slipping away because you had no energy to chase ‘em.”

“I appreciate it, Kacchan,” Izuku laughed, sliding into one of the pretty wooden chairs at their kitchen table – Kacchan had always had an eye for design, he made the whole apartment look beautiful. “It smells so good.”

“Damn right it does,” Katsuki said proudly, chest puffed up at the praise. “Only the best for my boyfriend.”

He scooped rice into a bowl with one hand, spooned egg over the top with the other, then took a piece of fresh fish from their little grill, setting it on a plate of its own. He put them down in front of Izuku, hovering over him as he admired the meal and sang Katsuki’s praises, and then he returned to the stove with his typical little hmph, brushing it off like it was no big deal.

“You’re so good at taking care of me,” Izuku said fondly, taking a big spoonful of rice and egg. “I love you, Kacchan.”

Katsuki turned around with a smile, opening his mouth to respond, then a loud, blaring alarm jolted Izuku out of his cozy world, back to the lumpy mattress where he lay alone, his apartment tiny and cluttered and devoid of delicious breakfast smells.

Every night he had the same dream, and every morning he woke up with a long, tired sigh, throwing an arm over his eyes to cast him back into darkness a moment longer. Maybe if he tried hard enough, he’d be able to go back, be able to hear Katsuki say the words he’d longed for since... Well, forever, really. Kacchan had always been special to him, from the first day that they met. Maybe he hadn’t understood it entirely, for a lot of that time, but he’d always felt it, and he’d always wished that maybe, one day, Katsuki would feel it too.

As he trudged his way out to the cold bathroom, the dream slowly began to fade from his mind. It would be back later on, when he crawled back into bed again, but for the moment it would retreat to the depths of his brain where it didn’t distract him all day. He had to go to work, after all! Had to save people! He couldn’t do that with images of a happy, loving Kacchan plaguing his mind.

Rustling in the living room made him freeze, listening, slowly moving one hand to turn off the tap. He didn’t have any pets, as much as he thought a cat would be nice to come home to for cuddles after a long day, so there was no easy explanation for why there was noise in his apartment.

In that moment, he really, really wished there was.

Footsteps, and he turned to face the door, raising his hands in front of his face. He was still half-asleep, and his muscles still ached from the morning cold, which wasn’t ideal for fighting, but he’d sure as hell do it if he had to.

“You’re up,” a familiar voice said, a big hand pushing the door open a little. “You alright?”

Izuku just stared, wide-eyed. This was definitely a new dream, at least his brain was finally mixing it up a little.

“Earth to Izuku,” Katsuki frowned. “Oi, space cadet, do you copy?”

“Y-Yeah! Sorry! I, uh... What are you doing here?”

“Are you kidding me? You think I was gonna leave you alone all night?”

Izuku just blinked at him, and Katsuki pinched the bridge of his nose, taking long, deep breaths to cool himself down.

“Do you remember what happened yesterday?” he asked.

Come to think of it, Izuku wasn’t sure he did.

“You got hit,” Katsuki explained. “Look in the damn mirror.”

Sure enough, when Izuku looked up, he found himself marred with cuts and bruises, his hair matted with blood and dirt, bandages wrapped around just about every piece of exposed skin that he possessed.

“You’re on heavy painkillers,” Katsuki continued, before Izuku could ask. “What do you remember?”

The dream. The same dream. Every night. Your face.

“Nothing specific,” he choked out, swallowing down all the words that wanted to come out in their place. “I remember who I am and everything, but I don’t remember a fight.”

“Alright,” Katsuki huffed. “Sit down, you’re a mess.”

Izuku looked around, and Katsuki kicked his bath stool at him pointedly, cracking a smirk when Izuku’s face filled with red.

“Nothing I ain’t seen before,” Katsuki pointed out. “We share a locker room, nerd.”

“That’s different!”

Katsuki picked up a towel, holding it out to him pointedly, and Izuku huffed as he accepted it. To his credit, Katsuki turned away as Izuku stripped off, his hands surprisingly clumsy as they tried to grip his clothing.

Towel wrapped around his waist, he sat down on the stool, letting Katsuki turn the shower on to start hosing him down.

“Tell me if anything hurts,” he instructed. “Too hot?”

“No, it’s fine,” Izuku assured him, when the water ran over his back. “I’ll let you know.”

He closed his eyes to help save himself a little embarrassment, focussing on the way the heat seeped into his muscles, loosening up tension he hadn’t even known he was holding. Katsuki’s palms were rough and calloused, a little too heavy-handed with his touch, but Izuku could tell he was doing his best to be gentle, to not jerk him around too much as he scrubbed dried blood and dirt off Izuku’s back and out of his hair. He took charge of his chest himself, frankly terrified by the thought of Katsuki’s face so close to his, and thankfully Katsuki didn’t object, moving instead to help out with Izuku’s legs.

“You can do under the towel yourself,” Katsuki suggested, when Izuku was scrubbed clean everywhere else. “I’m gonna go find you some clean clothes.”

“Thanks, Kacchan.”

Izuku waited for the door to close between them before he let out a long sigh, hands trembling as he peeled his towel off to finish cleaning up. Of all the dreams Izuku'd had in his life, of all the dreams he could have had, Katsuki helping give him a bath had not been on the list.

By the time Katsuki got back, Izuku was almost finished drying himself, a towel quickly clamped in front of his crotch when the footsteps approached. Katsuki knocked first, for once, then peeked inside, nodding faintly when he saw Izuku standing.

“Can’t be too bad, then,” he shrugged. “If you’re walking and shit.”

“I’m fine, Kacchan!”

“Uh-huh. Can you dress yourself?”

“Of course I can!”

“Alright, I’ll be just outside.”

He set the clothes down in a dry part of the room, then stepped out again, leaving Izuku with a little bit of dignity to hold on to. A pair of old, soft boxers went on first – the kind of worn-in pair that hadn’t quite turned into holes yet, but that felt super soft and comfortable against his skin, almost like he wasn’t wearing any. Then, a pair of fluffy sweatpants. Izuku was quickly seeing a theme.

It wasn’t until he reached the warm hoodie that he had to pause, grunting a little when his arms began to ache, and immediately Katsuki was knocking again.

“You need a hand?” he asked, cracking the door open again. “Don’t push yourself too hard.”

“I’m okay! Just my arms are a little stiff, that’s all!”

“Here, let me.”

He took the hoodie out of Izuku’s grip without waiting for a confirmation, holding the first arm open, and Izuku caved. When it came to Katsuki, he was not a strong man, and he could hardly resist such a soft, helpful Kacchan who insisted on doing things for him.

“What do you want to do today?” Katsuki asked, as he helped the second arm into the sleeve. “You probably shouldn’t try to go out much, if at all. I can go grab food if you don’t have anything.”

“I have food,” Izuku assured him. “I might just read a book or something, I’ve been trying to get through one but I never have the time.”

“In bed?”

“I was thinking in the living room.”

“Alright, just make sure you’re comfortable and supported.”

“You can stay, if you want.”

Izuku felt his face flush red. He hadn’t expected the words to slip out so unimpeded.

“I was planning on it,” Katsuki answered easily. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

“Thanks for caring, Kacchan.”

“Whatever, nerd, don’t start the sappy shit.”

“There is one thing you could do for me, if you want to help.”

“Name it.”

“Do you think you could cook me breakfast?”

“Yeah, of course. Anything in particular?”

Scrambled eggs on rice with a plate of grilled fish on the side, like you always make.

“Anything you feel like cooking is fine,” Izuku smiled awkwardly. “You don’t have to do anything special!”

“Got it. Sit your giant ass down, I ain’t gonna be responsible for you tripping over and hurting yourself worse or some shit.”

“Don’t be rude to my ass.”

“Stop doing so many squats, then.”

“Only when you stop doing so many bicep curls.”

“No wonder your arms are so puny if that’s the only thing you can come up with.”

“My arms are not puny!”

“Sit down and read your book.”

Izuku rolled his eyes, but he sat himself down, kicked his feet up on the cushions, and pulled his book from under the edge of the couch, ignoring the look of horror Katsuki gave him for it. Despite his silent complaint, he didn’t say a word about it out loud, and even hunted down a warm blanket to tuck over Izuku’s lap. It was adorably awkward and sweet, and Izuku knew he was falling in love all over again just from the few small gestures thrown his way.

“Comfy?”

“Yeah,” Izuku assured him. “Thanks.”

“Whatever.”

Katsuki stomped out to the kitchen, but Izuku knew there was no actual vitriol in it – that was just how Katsuki walked, most of the time. He clattered around in the kitchen, banging pots and pans, and Izuku smiled to himself as he opened his book.

In what felt like no time, Katsuki was back again, holding out a plate loaded with thick, fluffy pancakes. Each one was dusted lightly with sugar, with a drizzle of syrup on top, and Izuku’s mouth was watering before the plate was even in his lap.

“They look amazing, Kacchan!” he gushed. “You really went to all this effort for me?!”

“S’no big deal,” Katsuki shrugged, sitting down carefully by Izuku’s feet, at the other end of the couch. “Thought maybe they’d help your day suck less.”

“My day doesn’t suck at all!” Izuku protested, hugging his plate close just in case Katsuki tried to snatch it back. “I have you here, how could it possibly suck?”

“Ahh don’t start that shit, you gross nerd.”

“I’m serious!”

“Whatever.”

Izuku huffed, but he knew his pout was ruined by the pancake he shoved in his mouth at the same time, leaving sugar all over his lips. Katsuki just stared at him for a second, then shook his head, poking Izuku’s foot lightly instead of complaining.

“Oh?” he smirked, when Izuku squirmed away in a hurry. “What’s this, then? Big Hero Deku is ticklish?”

“No!” Izuku lied, hugging his knees to his chest. “Don’t bother!”

“Uh-huh,” Katsuki smirked. “Noted, nerd. For when you least expect it.”

“You’re so mean.”

“And you love it.”

Izuku didn’t dignify that with an answer – mostly because he sucked at lying, and the truth didn’t feel very appropriate. Maybe not the tickling in particular, but the playful teasing was fine by him, and the smirk was always a good bonus.

When he finished eating his pancakes, Katsuki took the dishes away immediately, returning with a water bottle each and a book of his own – despite calling Izuku a nerd, Katsuki always had a book in his bag. He tucked himself in at Izuku’s feet, careful not to take up any space that Izuku might need to be comfortable, and in a way that could never have happened with anyone else, a comfort that only Izuku and Katsuki shared with each other, they spent the entire day on that couch.

Sure, there were breaks for food and the bathroom, or the occasional leg stretch; sometimes they shared a fun line from their books, or explained plot twists they hadn’t seen coming; and once or twice they just set their books down to chat for a bit, Katsuki leaning back comfortably against the arm of the couch while Izuku curled up into a happy little ball.

It wasn’t until the sun went down that Izuku realised exactly how long they’d been there, just hanging out in each other’s company, and it made his chest tighten to realise that it might have been his best day in years. Something as simple as hanging around at home, relaxing, with Katsuki sitting next to him, was even better than the birthdays, the new year parties, all of it.

“Kacchan?” he asked quietly. “Thanks for staying today.”

“You trying to kick me out?” he snorted, nudging Izuku lightly with his toes. “I ain’t going anywhere, not until you’re better.”

“I had a really good day.”

Katsuki froze, gaze slowly lifting from his book, finding a painful sincerity waiting for him in Izuku’s emerald eyes.

“Did you sleep here last night?”

“You know I did, I didn’t just break in at the crack of dawn.”

“No, I mean here, on the couch.”

“Oh. Yeah, I did. It was comfortable enough.”

“You were that worried about me? Enough to stay that close?”

Katsuki shrugged vaguely, looking away to avoid Izuku’s prying eyes, always trying to coerce him into exposing his stupid emotions.

“You’d do the same for me,” he said after a minute, choosing his words more carefully than Izuku had ever heard before. “And you wouldn’t have let anyone else do it.”

That was true. Izuku adored his other friends, but he’d have talked them all into leaving. Katsuki wouldn’t have listened to the complaints, though – he’d have just sat himself down and ignored the protests, kicking his feet up on Izuku’s coffee table and waiting for him to wear himself out.

“Just say it,” Katsuki said, when Izuku began to mumble to himself nervously. “Don’t babble about shit, just say what you’re thinking.”

“I don’t think I can.”

“Try.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

Katsuki looked at him carefully, tilting his head as he considered every little piece of the expression on Izuku’s face, as if he could go straight through and see Izuku’s innermost thoughts.

“Say it,” he said again. “I won’t be mad.”

“You promise?”

“Yeah.”

The way Katsuki agreed so readily filled Izuku with a hope that he tried his hardest to quash. Katsuki didn’t make promises he couldn’t keep – if there was even the slightest doubt in his mind, he would never have said the words. Which meant one of two things: Katsuki was so confident in his ability to control his emotions that he was willing to give his word on it, or... maybe Katsuki already knew what he wanted to say.

“Would you stay with me tonight?” Izuku asked, testing the waters. “I’m fine, but...”

“I’ll stay,” Katsuki agreed. “But I want a better blanket, this one isn’t long enough to cover my feet. I hate that cold toe shit.”

“Sure,” Izuku smiled softly. “You can have any blanket you want.”

Katsuki narrowed his eyes slightly, and for a moment the room fell dead silent between them.

“May as well just take your bed, then,” Katsuki said finally.

“You can share with me,” Izuku agreed quickly. “I mean, if you want! I know it’s been a while, but-”

“Sure,” Katsuki nodded. “We can share.”

“Okay!”

Izuku braced himself for the inevitable caveats – no touching, pillow wall, keep your mouth shut – but they didn’t come, leaving the room quiet again.

“Are you tired now?” Katsuki asked. “You probably didn’t sleep great, and you’re not in the best shape. If you want an early night, I get it.”

“Maybe,” Izuku conceded. “I’ve really liked hanging out with you, I don’t want it to end, but... I’m pretty tired, even after doing nothing all day.”

“You’re recovering,” Katsuki shrugged. “They doped you up on a shitload of painkillers last night before they sent you home, so that won’t be helping the tiredness. They’ll start wearing off soon, you might need to take some before bed, so you don’t wake up screaming.”

“I will. I have some by my bed.”

“The good ones?”

“Of course,” Izuku chuckled. “I’m not sure the weak ones would help, anymore.”

“Not with the way you treat yourself,” Katsuki agreed. “If you wanna... hang out more, I can come with you.”

“Really?”

“I didn’t sleep much either,” he shrugged. “Some idiot kept me up half the night checking on him and shit, so I only got an hour at a time.”

Izuku’s eyes watered, and Katsuki groaned when he saw, nudging Izuku lightly in place of his usual shoves.

“Alright, bed,” he confirmed, jumping to his feet. “You need more water or anything first?”

“No, I’m good!”

“Alright.”

They took turns in the bathroom to brush their teeth, and when Izuku returned, he found Katsuki shirtless in his bedroom, fulfilling just about every fantasy that he’d ever dared to have about the man. He looked so effortless about it, not an ounce of self-consciousness about his body or his scars, just sitting on the edge of the bed and waiting for Izuku to return, with his stupid biceps bulging even without a proper flex to force it.

“Come on, then,” Katsuki grumbled, patting the other side of the mattress. “You still use this side?”

“Yeah!”

“Cool.”

He lay down, his head a little stiff on the spare pillow, and Izuku crept over to the bed to join him, shutting off the lights and nervously sitting down. His weight made the mattress dip, and he almost apologised, until he saw the hand reaching out, distracting him by helping with the hoodie he’d been wearing.

“Yeah, zips aren’t very comfortable in bed,” he mumbled to himself. “Better to take it off and...”

“Less mumbling more bed-ing.”

“Sorry!”

He lay down quickly, pulling the blankets up to cover his bare chest, and Katsuki lay right beside him, close enough to share his warmth. Katsuki had always been like a human space heater – it was a good thing Izuku hated the cold just as much as Katsuki did.

“You like me,” Katsuki said softly.

Izuku squeaked in his panic, face burning hot, but Katsuki shook his head when he started to fumble for an excuse.

“I hoped,” Katsuki explained. “I wasn’t sure.”

“H-Hoped?”

“Yeah.”

“Does that mean...?”

Katsuki rolled over to face him, his face so soft and sincere that it made Izuku’s heart ache.

“I don’t deserve you,” Katsuki said, refusing to let Izuku interject no matter how hard he tried. “I know I don’t, and I’m trying to do better. I am doing better, I think. Even if sometimes it’s for selfish reasons, like just... Being around you more.”

“That isn’t selfish! I like it too!”

Katsuki cracked a tiny smile, and Izuku pulled the blankets up to his nose, covering the worst of his blush.

“If you’ll let me try, I promise I’ll do my best to be good to you.”

“Are you serious?” Izuku whispered, voice refusing to go any louder, as if any loud noises or sudden movements might shatter whatever fragile thing it was that they were finally holding in their hands. “You’re not messing with me?”

“I wouldn’t.”

“I know, but... You’re not, right?”

“You like me,” Katsuki said again. “And I’m not good at this shit, not yet, but I think... I do too.”

“You like you too?” Izuku teased, unable to resist the temptation.

“Dickhead,” Katsuki chuckled, cracking a smile that Izuku desperately wanted to kiss right off of his lips. “You know what I mean.”

“Do I?”

“Come on,” he complained, rolling his eyes. “I mean, I think it’s what this is; I haven’t... dealt with this before. But... I’m pretty sure. And I want to try. If you’ll have me, I mean.”

“You’re really bad at this,” Izuku chuckled, shuffling a little closer. “I like you, Kacchan.”

“I... like you too. Izuku.”

Izuku smiled, and Katsuki followed suit, brighter than Izuku had seen it in years.

“Can I hug you?” he asked.

“Yeah, course.”

He wiggled in closer again, and Katsuki absorbed him into a hug, nestling him in all safe and warm and protected. Izuku was pretty sure he could have died happy in that moment.

“I have this dream,” Izuku offered, his voice barely a whisper. “About you and me.”

“Oh yeah?” Katsuki hummed, snuggling in a little tighter. “The kind that wakes you up to change your sheets?”

“No!” Izuku laughed, feeling Katsuki’s lips twitch into a smile against his hair. “Just... soft things.”

Katsuki snickered, and Izuku groaned, rolling away stubbornly only to be dragged right back in, Katsuki spooning him from behind.

“Tell me,” Katsuki said, running a hand through Izuku’s hair and making him shiver.

“It’s stupid.”

“Probably. Tell me.”

Izuku rolled his eyes, but Katsuki just waited, and finally he took a deep breath, closing his eyes to let the images roll back into his brain.

“I wake up and you’re in the kitchen,” he began quietly. “You’re always making me breakfast, telling me I need it to be strong so I don’t let any villains get away.”

“Mmm,” Katsuki hummed, resting his chin on Izuku’s head. “True. Your nutritional habits are pretty terrible. Continue.”

“Rude.”

“Continue,” he repeated.

“We live in a beautiful apartment, with all this nice furniture you picked out, because your taste is so good and I just buy what’s comfy.”

“Also true.”

“And you’re always so happy. You smile at me a bunch, like you’re just so happy to be there, to be with me. And it makes me feel so warm and fuzzy, to know I make you smile like that.”

“Hmm. True again.”

“What?”

“Course you make me happy, idiot.”

“I do?”

“Fuckin’ obviously. You don’t see me smiling like an idiot all the time when you do cute shit?”

“You think I’m cute?”

“Shut up. I’m gonna tickle you to death, asshole.”

“Nooo!” Izuku whined, squirming when Katsuki’s fingertips brushed down his side. “Don’t be mean, I’m injured!”

“Oh, now you play that card,” Katsuki snorted. “Whatever. You just want me to make you breakfast again in the morning?”

“You don’t have to, that isn’t what I meant.”

“I don’t do shit if I don’t want to, you know what. I like cooking, and making you eat better is a pretty good bonus. Maybe you’ll actually give me a run for my money in the next rankings.”

“You and I both know I’m above you in the charts right now.”

“Only because I swore on camera.”

“It still counts!”

“Yeah, ‘cause the dumb little kids adore you. And their parents, with all your ‘work hard! be good!’ bullshit.”

“But they should work hard and be good!”

“Damn goody two-shoes. Throw a few ‘fuck’s around, it’ll be cool.”

“Never!”

Izuku turned over again finally, meeting Katsuki’s gaze, and Katsuki’s lips softened into a sweet little smile when he saw Izuku’s grin.

“There you go again,” he complained, without even a hint of authenticity in his tone. “Making me smile and shit, cut it out.”

“Never.”

He untangled one hand from Katsuki’s grip, lifting it to brush his fingertips over Katsuki’s soft lips, grinning again when Katsuki squirmed.

“You’re ticklish too,” he teased. “Good to know.”

“Shut up and go to sleep.”

Izuku laughed, but he snuggled in obediently, getting comfy and cozy.

“Thanks for taking care of me, Kacchan.”

“Any time,” Katsuki answered. “Every time. Every day. From now on.”

Izuku giggled. Katsuki’s awkwardness about being sappy was just so endearing.

“G’night nerd, get some rest. I’ll be here.”

“Thanks, Kacchan. Sweet dreams.”

He closed his eyes, letting himself sink into Katsuki’s embrace, his body filling in all the curves of Katsuki’s as if they were made to be pieced together, as if they’d just been waiting for that moment all their lives, to fit back together, to come home.

He had the same dream every night. And that night, Izuku didn’t mind it at all.