What does Autistic Joy Actually Mean? And why don't you feel it? | Autistic Advice #10
Added 2025-02-13 15:00:16 +0000 UTC
Comments
this sweater lives rent free in my head. looks incredibly soft & satisfying.
Kaylin Jefferson
2026-01-30 19:18:59 +0000 UTCSo I dont know if this is something im allowed to talk about considering it has to do with drugs but I am of legal age where I am and its legal here in my state so here I go. When I smoke weed I think is some of the only time ive experienced autistic joy because I feel like ive had to mask my very large reactions because people always found them disruptive or annoying if they weren't my family. Once when I smoked weed my roomates had a new kitten who loved cuddles and I could feel his purring chasing all around my skin ( i also have auditory tactile synthesia) and I just pet and danced with him in my lap and enjoyed that feeling. It was just him and me and the whole world was not existent around us. Usually other times i've experienced it seemingly have to do with my special interest of the show ncis or other times when ive smoked weed and my auditore tactile synistia was heightened because of that.
Lance Cee
2025-11-14 22:33:18 +0000 UTCThe type of autistic joy I experience, especially when sharing my special interest in movies with other people, is probably pretty subtle from the outside, but on the inside I feel like my eyes are sparkling in that typical cartoony/anime way. 💖
NiehtMarie
2025-07-18 10:20:27 +0000 UTCIt IS a childlike joy for me. It’s wonderful
Francesca Ward
2025-05-26 19:15:47 +0000 UTCI rarely experience autistic joy, but when I do, it comes out in heightened emotions and stimming that is not something I can hold in. Despite being high masking and not looking like the type to jump up and down, clap, or even hug someone, I’ve been known to do one or two of those things when I get overwhelmed by a positive emotion. Usually I hate clapping, and even refuse to do it, but rarely my body just does it in happiness but it’s not loud. I’m very particular about who can hug me, so if I see one of my favourite people that autism has decide yup, THAT one, I have leapt in the air for joy, and will run at them to hug them unless they’ve expressed a boundary otherwise. Then I will flap my hands (which I also rarely do it only happens involuntarily as an overflow. The one my mum finds really cute is when I’m sitting down and it happens I’ll flap my hands and tippy tap tippy tap my feet against the floor. Again. It’s involuntary it just happens. People who have seen these know me very well and find it endearing because it’s a sign of my true joy. I don’t “choose” to do it, so when it happens they know it’s genuinely how I feel. Sometimes I cry happy tears when I get overwhelmed. I cry a lot when internalising a meltdown too and in external meltdowns and definitely afterwards. Crying is a huge overflow/overwhelm behaviour for me
Francesca Ward
2025-05-26 19:14:12 +0000 UTCI think I experience it more like Morgan, more internalised. But, I do feel joy over very small, simple things. It’s how I know I’m in a good place mentally when I’m excited about the little things. The question I’ve been thinking about a lot is whether this is natural for me or whether I have masked so much to not appear weird or to inconvenience others that I have dampened down but natural way of expressing joy. It’s the same with meltdowns. I would say I don’t have them, I just have shutdowns. But is that actually natural for me or have I just forced myself to internalise everything. Because when I feel stressed or overwhelmed, I feel it physically - I will feel sick, have migraines, unexplainable pain etc. Is this my body reacting to something I won’t allow myself to express? It make me sad to think about it.
Becky
2025-05-17 08:36:12 +0000 UTCI am definitely one of those people who experience autistic joy in that all encompassing euphoric way. It usually happens if I have discovered something new or information surrounding a special interest that makes me feel connected to it on a level that feels otherworldly or when something super exciting is about to happen and I can’t contain my excitement. When I am in it, the feeling of it is all I can think about, along with the thing that has fuelled it in the first place. It’s as if no other feeling exists. It comes out outwardly through physical and vocal stims. It is something I have experienced since childhood, but it is also something I was encouraged to suppress. I was considered to be a quiet but also a hyperactive child, and would be punished and told that my hyperactivity was something I could control. I was not believed when I would say I couldn’t control it. I feel hyperactivity and autistic joy are very similar and feel almost the same sometimes, but the triggers for them is entirely different. Since being self diagnosed as autistic, I have come to realise that my hyperactivity is stemmed within sensory overwhelm, where as autistic joy comes from passion. From an outward perspective they look the same. Being told off for having hyperactive “episodes” I began to attempt to suppress them, but would be unsuccessful, my body being in this state of crying with laughter and goofy behaviour, but in the inside screaming and sobbing because I so desperately wanted it to stop so that I wouldn’t get punished. I don’t believe I have experienced this within autistic joy itself. As I got older, I managed to suppress my hyperactivity through shutting down and dissociating, but my ability to feel autistic joy went with it. So I completely relate to Morgan’s experience too. Since I have discovered that I may be autistic in my mid to late 20’s, I am finding that autistic joy is not only something I can still experience, but it also feels so much more natural to me when it comes to feeling heightened positive emotions. The ability to re-enter realm of autistic joy has also made me realise that it is the only time I feel I fully unmask, so it has given me the first steps into my unmasking journey ♡
⋆｡ ݁𖥔. froggo .𖥔 ݁｡⋆
2025-04-10 11:38:25 +0000 UTCPeople behave so differently at concerts - it's so interesting! Quite a few of the biggest music lovers I know just internalise completely as you described! I often feel too awkward to move around a lot - I want to and I do try, but it's hard to let go!
I'm Autistic, Now What
2025-03-14 21:48:21 +0000 UTCI'm sorry you were given that feedback when you were younger 🫂💛
I'm Autistic, Now What
2025-03-14 21:39:03 +0000 UTCI'm so glad you found it helpful! 💛💛💛
I'm Autistic, Now What
2025-03-14 21:38:24 +0000 UTCI've been diagnosed pretty late in life so I'm only revisiting memories with a new lens now : I think I feel everything very intensely and most of the time I internalise joy because expressing it would be "too much" for the situation. Joy makes me ugly cry like someone just died :/ For the longest time I even thought it was sadness, because of my physical reaction ! I rarely let it out. For example I love going to concerts with my friends (I absolutely love loud music and being in the crowd with other people who like the same artists is just f***ing amazing) and one day my friend asked me "do you even like the music?" : she was very worried because I never smiled, moved or ANYTHING, I just stood still and watched. She thought I came with her just to please her. At the time I was very surprised (I had never even thought about it) and only responded "oh I love it! I just don't move and take it all in!". Now I realise that I probably internalise what I feel because my feelings are soooo strong, and when I express joy physically it's very... I don't know.. I don't like how it looks ? Even my smile feels weird on my face... I feel like I look too weird, I don't know. I've suppressed it for so long that I don't even know how to move! When I try to follow the crowd I feel so weird too, it's not natural for me... In hindsight it must feel very weird for my friends seeing me being so still because in other settings I'm very chatty, happy and physical (maybe it's the ADHD, I don't know). One time I got really overwhelmed because we got to see live a japanese group that came to europe for the first time ever, and the concert was AMAZING (the venue, lights, costumes, choreographies, everything) and we were in a very good spot close to the stage. I let my joy out because it was too strong to keep in this time (and maybe I was aware that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity so it was THE moment to feel joy haha) and I went at it soooo hard that I litteraly sprained my anckle from jumping too much haha. The good part is that this one time was so special that everyone was overwhelmed by joy and even my friends cried at the end, so I could finally let the tears flow ^^ At another concert I was in the front rows and the thing got filmed. Everyone seeing me on Youtube was like "omygod you never ever move, it must be soooo frustrating for the artists to see someone not enjoying the gig" :( ... I was so ashamed... That's not AT ALL what I wanna convey! (this was all long before my diagnosis) So now I try to just follow the rest of the crowd (arms up, chanting, etc) but I always feel veeeery weird doing it haha. If I really let MY joy out I would be crying my eyes out and skaking my fists along my torso haha I really like watching the crowd having fun (circle pits, etc) and sometimes I regret not being able to be a part of the general vibe. It's like even here, with people who like the same things as me, I feel immense joy but at the same time I don't feel completely in tune with the crowd...
hakugei_
2025-03-14 12:17:19 +0000 UTCI definitely feel this, but as someone who was told to 'rein it in' over and over as a child and young adult, I don't express it physically as much. Sometimes it can get to the point where it's too much and I start crying as well.
Stephanie Hicks
2025-03-11 18:24:32 +0000 UTCI really appreciate this video!! Just in the last couple weeks, I’ve been using the Finch app and it asks you to rate your mood on a scale of 5 emojis. I most always pick the 😐 emoji in the middle because I just feel “fine”. Like not bad but also not good. And I realized that any joy I experience is very short-lived and transitory. And that made me think something is wrong with me, but knowing it’s common with other autistics to feel this way puts a lot into perspective and gives me a lot to think about. Thank you!! 💜
MB
2025-03-10 00:58:34 +0000 UTC
