F/VoH Ch 103: Just a Joke

Cheonghee was taken aback, and after a few seconds, she turned her gaze away, a faint blush appearing on her cheeks. “Is that true?” Cheonghee asked in a low tone, slightly hesitant yet full of hope.

“Hm...? Yes, it’s true,” Ryan replied, though he sounded a bit confused by Cheonghee's sudden response.

Cheonghee lifted her face, and now her eyes were filled with deep sympathy. “It must be hard, right? Living without being able to express your emotions more freely.”

Ryan furrowed his brow for a moment, not used to receiving such attention. He turned his gaze away, his face showing a bit of discomfort. “It’s… not that important, after all, it’s just a feeling—”

Before Ryan could finish his sentence, Cheonghee stepped forward and, without warning, pulled Ryan into a gentle yet warm embrace. Cheonghee hugged Ryan tightly, not with strength, but with deep and sincere warmth.

“It must be difficult, holding all of that in alone… Don’t worry, I’ll help you feel your emotions more often from now on,” Cheonghee whispered softly, her voice almost like a gentle breeze in Ryan's ear. “So, show more of your emotions, okay?”

Ryan remained silent in the embrace, this time not feeling the soft chest he was used to, but the warm shoulder of Cheonghee that provided a sense of calm amidst his confusion.

Ryan just stared at Cheonghee with a confused and somewhat anxious expression. For Ryan, showing emotions was not something important, and he was not someone who liked to express his feelings in front of others. Ryan felt more comfortable keeping everything to himself, burying those feelings deep inside.

“No need to… after all, it’s not important,” Ryan said quietly while trying to free himself from Cheonghee's embrace.

However, Cheonghee only tightened her hold, not wanting to let go. Cheonghee’s face moved closer to Ryan’s ear, her voice soft yet firm. “I promise… I will carry your child and help you show more of the emotions you’ve been holding back,” Cheonghee whispered with conviction.

“Hey—! I meant having a child was just a joke!” Ryan stammered, trying to explain his true meaning. The look of confusion on Ryan's face became more pronounced, and he appeared awkward. As a six-year-old boy, the idea of having a child was not something that had ever seriously crossed Ryan's mind.

Sighing, Ryan tried to clarify everything in front of Cheonghee, even though he knew his explanation might sound too complicated. Deep down, Ryan knew the reason was not as simple as just age.

Ryan had many things to take care of—too many, in fact—and he never felt there was room for the responsibility of having a child. Moreover, the biggest problem Ryan faced right now was the looming threat of death that hung over him. The Killer Death Syndrome, a disease that was slowly taking Ryan's life, cast a shadow over every step he took.

At such a young age, Ryan knew that his life expectancy might only be nine more years. He didn’t know what would cure or stop this disease, and this made him refrain from thinking too far into the future, let alone thinking about a child who would need his attention every day.

Because if Ryan really had a child, there would be many new worries weighing on his mind. Every second he would feel anxious, thinking about that child's fate in a world full of threats.

A world that Ryan believed would become increasingly dangerous in the future. So, Ryan chose to avoid such thoughts—to not be bound by emotions that could potentially weaken him, and not give himself any additional reasons to be anxious.

Ryan took a deep breath, then looked at Cheonghee. “So, you understand, right?” Ryan said, trying to maintain a calm tone. “I meant about the child earlier, it was just a joke… I really wasn’t serious.”