Alex in Wonderland, Part 2

To think that I would click on one of the banner ads that accompanied my admittedly soft choices in pornography was madness. I knew that was the way you got viruses and spyware, or, best case, spent a hundred dollars on some chat line or web session. I was above that, I thought. Turns out they just weren’t marketing to me. 

The White Rabbit did, though. The headline read, “LET A WOMAN MAKE A REAL GIRL OUT OF YOU!” Beneath that, a row of headshots of gorgeous women, all staring right into the camera in as inviting a way as possible. There were a few lines beneath, and the smaller copy was even more alluring. 

“Always wanted to let the girl inside you out? Join our community of like-minded adults and find the woman of your dreams, inside and out!”

Below that, a link to a website URL. I was clicking on it before I thought to stop myself. The website was just a landing page with some of the same photos as the banner ad lining the top and bottom. By the description, it was both a physical place and a dating site of sorts, meant to connect guys who liked dressing as girls with girls who liked guys that liked to dress as girls. I was posed with the choice to login or register, so I selected register. 

The site asked for an address and a phone number, but strangely no credit card. Still, I wasn’t going to enter my personal information that easily, no matter how seductive the promise of such a place might be. Instead, I put on my detective heels and went into a deep dive on The White Rabbit. Ironically, and perhaps more fatefully, The White Rabbit’s brick-and-mortar presence was in my city. Not downtown like I was, but more on the industrial side of town. There were few clubs in the area, and I guessed that was by design. The kind of people whoa attended an event at The White Rabbit might not be the kind who wanted to be seen by a lot of people.

Not a lot in the way of Yelp reviews for a place like this, but I found some mentions on forum posts. These were the kinds of forums that traded information about home use of estrogen, and the best foods to make a boyish shape decidedly less boyish. An underground cabal of do-it-yourself gender-benders that wanted to reinvent themselves from the ashes of their masculinity. Some wanted the full experience, to be entirely feminine. Others liked having a cock. The devil you know, I guess. 

In one such forum, there were a few posts from a guy a few years back, saying that he caught wind of The White Rabbit and was looking for any word on the place. Most of the responses were an unhelpful, ‘Never heard of it,’ or ‘Nah, good luck!’ One caught my eye, though. It was a poster who commented on this thread and nowhere else. 

‘My boyfriend went to this place. Don’t be fooled! This is for real! I’ve lost him completely! I hope The White Rabbit burns to the ground!’

Nothing after that, at least on that thread. What intrigued me was that there were a handful of posts scattered about the internet of men saying they were going to go check the place out, but never a follow-up. No angry screeds about how the place was a scam. Nor any that said they’d met the love of their unusual life. A giant sucking vacuum of information after announcing an intention to go. 

I was sure the place was one of those fronts used by the exceedingly rich to lure the poor into their clutches so they could hunt you on a private island for sport, or maybe torture you for some kind of sexual thrill. But still, I was going to the website every day, often many times in a day, almost entering my registration information so I could learn more. I wanted a peek behind the curtain. I wanted to know.

And so I did. I gave all my information to the strangers at The White Rabbit, and I was at their mercy. But, I had a login, and my journey began.