RSAHNP: ONE-SHOT: Ron the Virgin

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*It was late afternoon in the Stoppable residence, and all was quiet and relatively peaceful for once. Ron decided that now was as good a time as any to try to take a nice, hot, relaxing shower. He figured since Kim, Adrena Lynn and Shego were in the living room, busy surfing the channels and streaming services for something to watch, it would be safe for him to clean himself up and not worry about any of the ladies trying to seduce him. It was especially true when it came to Shego; the former Villainess was determined to get him all to herself and ravish him in the most intimate of ways.*

*He'd be a liar if he didn't think about having sex with Shego on a daily basis... or Kim and Adrena Lynn, for that matter. But despite his intense primal urges, Ron was one of those rare individuals who was ruled not by his carnal desires, but instead by his big, selfless, kind, compassionate and loving heart. He didn't see any of the three beautiful women solely as sex objects, nor did he wish to take advantage of his current predicament he was in to satisfy his lust. It was difficult to maintain control, that's for sure. Each of the gorgeous women practically tempted him to the edge just by walking around in nothing but their underwear and a t-shirt on a daily basis (if not less given Shego's boldness at walking around him in the nude after a shower). If he hasn't mastered self control yet, he was certain he was only a few levels from obtaining mastery of it.*

*True, he cared about the three women living with him in his parent's home. He definitely considered them to be highly attractive. And it was no secret that he was attracted to each of the ladies, more than just a physical sense. If Ron really looked into his heart, he would acknowledge the truth of the matter and that truth is... He loved them. Would he eventually come to realize this? Only time would tell. Taking off his clothes, Ron closes and locks the door before entering the shower, turning on the water and allowing it to wash over his defined muscles.*

Ron: Oh, yeah... Booyah, that's just what the Ron-Man needed! Getting clean and fresh for the ladies. *Chuckles* Can't believe I can actually say that now and mean it. I just hope they don't get in another fight while I'm gone.

*Unbeknownst to Ron, the very ladies in question - Shego, Kim and Adrena Lynn - were currently in the living room. However, their attention wasn't on the television or the show (which happened to be a documentary on prehistoric wildlife). No, their focus was on something they deemed far more important.*

Shego: Okay, ladies, we all know why we're here and what it is that we wish to discuss.

Adrena: You're freaking right about that, Shego.

Kim: Okay, then let's get right into the sitch. We've all seen Ron, with and without clothes.

Shego: Mmhmm... You can say that again, Princess.

Kim: Anyway... I'm sure you've all noticed how toned Ron is physically.

Adrena: That's an understatement! Did you see his freaking muscles? And those delicious abs?

Shego: Oh, yeah! I get hot and wet just thinking about them.

Adrena: Me too! How can someone be so cute and possess such a manly bod? It's freaking unbelievable! I just wanna jump him and tell him to fuck me senseless until I lose consciousness!

Shego: I'd be game for that! I wouldn't even leave the bed as long as he wanted to have some sexy fucking fun. *A barracuda grin forms on her face as she proceeds to lick her bottom lip in a sultry manner.*

Kim: Shego, Lynn! Focus!

Shego: Hey, you started it! Don't blame us that you're just as thirsty and craving some Ron-shine as much as the rest of us!

Kim: Okay, okay! That being said, that brings us to the point of this particular topic of discussion. Ron is a major hottie... And there's no way he can possibly be a virgin, right?

Shego: Yeah, no way. *Her and Adrena Lynn nod their heads in agreement with Kim.*

Adrena: Mmhmm.

Kim: That brings us to what we've all been wondering. Who did Ron have sex with? Who was his first?

Shego: Aren't you supposed to be his best friend? If anyone would know, it'd be you since our Master has been friends with you the longest.

Kim: That's just it! He hasn't told me anything!

Shego: So our Master has secrets he keeps even from you? Interesting.

Adrena: Do you have any ideas of who our Master may have gotten freaky with?

Shego: If not, I got a juicy suspect or two in mind.

Kim: Oh, really? Enlighten me, Shego.

Shego: Well, have you ever considered that your hot Milf of a Mom might be the one who's popped Ron's cherry?

Kim: WHAT?!

Shego: Think about it, Kimmie. A lonely, gorgeous, unsatisfied, sexually frustrated Milf like Dr. Ann Possible alone at home one day. You're off hanging with friends or whatever. A hot stud like Ron comes over to help out with chores or something. Next thing you know... Boom! They're fucking like a bunch of wild animals.

*It was then Kim began to actually visualize an entire scenario where her Mom and Ron were in the kitchen, cleaning up after having a delicious dinner only for it to go haywire as Ron and her Mom begin stripping out of their clothes and kissing passionately. It's almost immediately that Kim has another visualization of a scenario involving Ron and Dr. Ann Possible. Ron is coming over with a gift, presumably a birthday gift for Kim's Mom which he always brings every year. Ron rings the doorbell, but when it opens it reveals Ann Possible in the most sexy light blue lingerie that one could imagine. Caught offguard by the sight and beauty before him, the blushing form of Ron nervously offers her the gift in his hands.*

Ron: H-H-Ha-Ha-Happy Birthday, Mrs. Dr. P!

Ann: Oh, Ronald! You always remember my birthday! You're such a sweet, thoughtful, handsome young man.

Ron: Uh... T-Thanks, Mrs. Dr. P. *He nervously rubs the back of his neck, trying to keep his eyes from staring at the stunning beauty before him.*

Ann: *A sultry, seductive smile graces her features as she sets the gift aside and takes a step towards Ron.* Well, since you were kind enough to get me a gift, how about I give you one?

*Before he could react, Ron is pulled into the Possible home and the door slammed shut behind them. Ann proceeds to drag Ron into the living room, push him onto the couch, and then proceeds to straddle him. Leaning in close, her lips almost touching his own, Ann whispers.*

Ann: Fuck me, Ron. You deserve this.

*It is then Kim snaps out of vision, her face red and her heart pounding. She couldn't believe she allowed Shego to get in her head like that! What was she thinking?! There's no way her Mom could've had sex with Ron!*

Kim: No! No!! No!!! NO!!!! My Mom is a happily married woman! She would never have sex with Ron in a million years! You're out of your goddamn mind, Shego, to even think she'd be the one to take his virginity!

Shego: *Nonchalantly, the Villainess shrugs her shoulders.* Okay. Keep telling yourself that, Pumpkin. But I know if I was Ron, I'd definitely fuck your hot Momma if given a chance. Then there's that other hot Milf Mom of his one friend in a wheelchair. She's another one that I think is a likely suspect, because honestly I could see Ron banging her, too. It'd definitely explain those game nights they have, huh?

Kim: Shut up, Shego! You obviously don't know what you're talking about!

Adrena: Okay, then who do you freaking suspect, Possible?

Kim: *Smiling confidently, the redhead holds up a book titled "Middleton High School Year Book" to show them.* I'm glad you asked, Lynn, because I got all the suspects right in this book.

*It was then that Shego and Adrena Lynn got up from the recliner chairs to situate themselves on the sofa. Adrena Lynn sitting on the left, Shego sitting on the right, and Kim being sandwiched between them. Opening the book, Kim turns a few pages until she gets to the one she wanted. The three beauties peer into the book, looking at all the females pictured.*

Kim: Okay, my first suspect is Tara King. She's a member of the Cheer Squad and she's had a major crush on Ron for the longest time. She may even... love him.

*Shego and Adrena Lynn examine the photo of the wavy-haired, blonde, blue-eyed cheerleader. She was definitely beautiful, exceptionally sweet and cute. Plus, out of the ladies of the Middleton High Cheerleaders, she definitely had the largest breasts. It was then Shego and Adrena Lynn shared a glance, immediately liking the potential of having Tara King join them in some intimate fun with their Master. The fact that it appeared Kim was a bit jealous of the blonde was a bonus.*

Shego: Oh, she's really cute. I definitely approve. By the way, do I detect a hint of jealousy, Princess?

Kim: No! Of course not. I'm not jealous of Tara, she's a real sweetheart... even if she did have sex with Ron first.

Adrena Lynn: Anyone else?

Kim: Oh, yeah. I've got quite a few. Next is Zita Flores. Her and Ron briefly dated for awhile, but I don't believe it went anywhere other than them being close friends. I mean, I could be wrong. I think she's working on being a computer tech operative of that Monarch organization. Right now she's in South America at one of their bases. How I know about that is because she still keeps in contact with Ron and myself. She's a really nice girl.

*Examining the photo of raven-haired Latina with dark chocolate eyes, Shego and Adrena Lynn admitted subconsciously that there could've been potentially something going on while her and Ron dated. Why on Earth she, or any other woman for that matter, would just want to be a friends with a hunk like Ron is beyond their understanding.*

Adrena: Not bad. She looks like she could be fun. Why did she only wanna be friends though?

Kim: Not a clue.

Shego: Maybe she's more into women? Not that I blame her. Other than Ron, I haven't been really attracted to men.

Kim: Oh! I almost forgot about Yori. She's a student at the Yamanuchi school in Japan. Ron was part of the exchange program and they bonded. She's not in the year book, but I have her picture on my Kimmunicator. If you ask me, she had it bad for Ron, like on par with Tara and us.

*Pulling out her Kimmunicator, she pulls up a picture of Yori and Ron. She was a beautiful Japanese girl with enchanting brown eyes, medium length black hair, and a nice athletic body. It wasn't difficult to see how Ron could become smitten while in her presence.*

Shego: Ooooh! It's nice that our Master has such good tastes in women.

Adrena Lynn: Yeah, so far they've all looked good.

Kim: We're not done yet. Back to the Year Book! Okay, next on the list is Penny McIntyre. I don't know much about her, other than she's nice and gets good grades. Plus, I know for a fact that Ron considers her eyes to be the most beautiful or "beautylicious" in the entire school.

*All three women gaze at the photo of Penny McIntyre; she was wearing a blue shirt and a matching skirt, her long blonde hair flowing freely as she smiled at the camera. Her eyes were astoundingly beautiful, like staring at the depths of a star-lit cosmos. On top of that, she possessed a great figure and a pair of breasts that easily rival those of Tara and Adrena Lynn. It wasn't difficult to see why Ron would be infatuated with such a gal.*

Shego: Oh, wow! She's a majorly cute blonde babe. I can see why Ron would be so interested in her.

Adrena Lynn: And her eyes are freaking gorgeous!

Shego: She's got a nice body, too. I wouldn't mind taking her on a test run with Ron.

Kim: Okay, okay! No more fantasizing about having sex with women! Gah!

Shego: You should give it a try, Kimmie. You'd love it. I know if you want, you can park that delicious bubble-butt of yours on my face.

Kim: Hard pass. Now let's continue. Next is my best friend, Monique Williams. She and Ron share quite a few interests. They've went to numerous GWA wrestling events and movies together, they were partners on a science project last year, and they both enjoy Bueno Nacho! I was unfortunate enough to see them competing in one of their "eating contests"... and I never looked at her the same way again.

*Shego and Adrena Lynn inspect the visual image of Monique, taking in her appearance down to the last detail. Long, curly black hair. Large breasts. Beautiful features. Good fashion sense. Yep, she was definitely someone that'd be capable seducing Ron into losing his virginity.*

Adrena Lynn: She looks fun. I wonder if she could go shopping with me?

Shego: Mmm... I guess Ron loves himself some sexual chocolate. I'd hit that if I were Ron.

Kim: Would you cool your plasma, Shego!? Seriously, what is with you? Are you that horny?

Shego: Princess, I'm always game for a couple rounds of passionate sex. And right now? I'd love nothing more than to devour our Master. If he wants to include a girl or two, that'll make it all the more juicy.

Kim: Grrr...

Adrena Lynn: Now, let's not start a freaking fight, ladies. We got more suspects to look over. Right?

Kim: Yeah. Two more suspects, in fact. I hope I'm wrong about Ron having sex with them though.

Adrena Lynn: Why's that?

Kim: Lets just say I really, really, really do not like these individuals.

Shego: Okay, I'm intrigued.

Kim: This is Bonnie Rockwaller. She's a member of the Cheer Squad, and she is the absolute biggest pain in my ass. She's always bad-mouthing me and Ron at every opportunity she gets. She acts like she's so much better than everyone else, always upholding the delusional idea of the high school food chain. And she's just so bossy, conceited, shallow and so... so... ugh! God, I hate her!

*After Kim's outburst of rage, Shego and Adrena Lynn look at the photo of Bonnie Rockwaller. The bombshell brunette had a smile that was confident, almost predatory like a barracuda. She had ample breasts, a great athletic physique, and dazzling teal colored eyes. She was probably considered one of the most beautiful ladies in Middleton High School. But why did Kim consider her a suspect?*

Shego: Attractive. Nice tits. Athletic physique. Okay, is she your rival or something, Princess?

Adrena Lynn: And why do you consider her a suspect?

Kim: I don't know! Maybe I feel like she'd have sex with Ron just to spite me or something.

Shego: Ah, I see. One of those deals. High School Nemesis fucks your best friend to get a rise out of you and to beat you to the punch. Gotcha.

Adrena Lynn: Who's the final person you suspect that may have taken Ron's virginity?

*Kim turns the pages of the Year Book before finally finding the page she had been looking for. A photo of a stunningly gorgeous woman with wavy chocolate-brown hair, who's dark green eyes and curvaceous body simply radiated a supreme confidence was revealed to Shego and Adrena Lynn. For the first time in her life, Adrena Lynn felt jealousy and even a bit intimidated by the beautiful brunette. There was no jealousy from Shego, but the appearance of Amelia had reminded her of an old Go City High School rival that she loathed with a fiery passion. It was enough for her to join Adrena Lynn in their mutual animosity, the two women glaring at the image with an intensity only seen when they're angry.*

Kim: Amelia Rodriguez. She was a Senoir, but now she's graduated and been in college for a few years. She was pretty much top of the High School food chain, even more than Bonnie. She did have a thing for Ron when he briefly got a new wardrobe and hairstyle, not to mention when he flaunted his Naco Royalty money about. Oh, and in that dumb Animology test, she was apparently Ron's soulmate.

Adrena Lynn: I don't like her. I really, really freaking do not like her.

Shego: Don't worry, Lynn. She's got nothing on either of us.

Adrena Lynn: Except potentially taking Ron's virginity.

Shego: Grrr... Why do I feel the sudden urge to go find her and punch her in the face?

Kim: I know the feeling. Believe me.

Adrena Lynn: We got our suspects. Now what? Are we going to freaking do anything about it?

Kim: We have to consider the possibilities of when any of the suspects could have potentially had sex with Ron. And then... we confront him to get the truth.

Shego: I still think your Milf Mommy could have fucked him. Or his best friend's Mom.

Kim: My Mom and Ms. Renton didn't have sex with Ron! God! Stop bringing it up already!

Shego: Anything's possible, Princess! I'm just covering all the bases.

Adrena Lynn: I'm wondering if that Amelia seduced our Master and had her way with him.

*It was then that Kim, Shego and Adrena Lynn began envisioning potential scenarios in which any of the women suspects could have potentially had sex with Ron. Obviously, Shego was thinking of Dr. Ann Possible or Maria Renton engaging Ron in sexual intercourse. Adrena Lynn was dreading the very idea of someone as beloved as Ron being seduced and taken by Amelia. Kim couldn't help but conjure up multiple times Ron may have had sex with Tara, Zita, Yori, Monique, Penny and, even to her horror, her nemesis Bonnie Rockwaller. It was all too much for any of the ladies to imagine and ponder any longer. They needed to know! Now!*

Kim, Shego and Adrena Lynn (simultaneously): We need to talk to Ron!

*Now that he was dry and in some comfortable lounge clothing that consisted of a tank-top t-shirt and a pair of shorts, Ron came out of the bathroom. However, he did not expect to see Kim, Shego and Adrena Lynn to be awaiting him. And judging by their expressions, they weren't in the most docile of moods. It immediately made Ron consider his fight or flight instincts... particularly running away as fast as possible. Instead, Ron chose to still his nerves, keep his feet planted firmly where they are and offer the three women his usual warm, goofy, charismatic smile.*

Ron: Uh... Hey, ladies. What's up?

Kim: Who was it, Ron?

Ron: Who was what, KP?

Shego: Don't play cute, Master. It's not gonna work this time. *She pushes Ron back onto the bed, the three women immediately seating themselves around him.* So spill.

Ron: Spill what? I don't get it?

Adrena Lynn: Was it Amelia? Please, Master, tell me it wasn't her!

Ron: Huh? Amelia? What are you...?

Kim: Was it Tara? Yori? Zita? Monique? Penny? God, please tell me it wasn't with Bonnie!? Anyone but Bonnie!

Ron: Wha-Wha-What?! KP, what're you talking about?!

Shego: Was it Kim's Mom? You know, Dr. Ann Possible? Maybe your friend in a wheelchair's Mom? Mrs. Renton, I believe it was? C'mon, you can tell me.

Ron: Huh? Shego, what're you...?!

Kim, Adrena and Shego (Simultaneously): Who did you have sex with?

Ron: .... .... ....

Shego: Well?

Ron: WHAT?!

Kim: We want to know who you had sex with for the first time.

Adrena Lynn: Yeah, who did you get freaky with first and lose your virginity to?

Ron: I didn't have sex with anyone!

Shego: Don't be lying, Ronnie. I can smell lies.

Ron: But I'm not! I haven't had sex with anyone before! Ever! Not even once!

Kim: Right, as if we are supposed to believe you are a virgin.

Ron: *Blushing, he rubs the back of his neck, finding it difficult to make eye contact with any of the ladies.* Well... I... It's... Because... Actually... I am.

*For a moment, they three women stared at Ron, as if trying to determine what he had said was true... and it is. It's true! Kim, Shego and Adrena Lynn were utterly shocked and floored by this unexpected revelation. All they could do is stare and gap at him, eyes wide with disbelief as their minds tried to comprehend what they've now discovered. Ron Stoppable, the man all three of them loved and adored, was still a virgin. Pure. Untainted. Untouched. He never experienced sex. Ever. How was it even remotely possible? Especially given his physique and endearing personality! It just seemed impossible, and yet it wasn't.*

Adrena Lynn: No... Freaking... Way.

Kim: You're... a virgin? For real?

Ron: Yeah, KP, I really am.

Kim: You mean... You never had sex? With anyone? Ever?

Ron: Nope.

Kim: But what about when you and Zita were dating? Didn't you guys...?

Ron: Uh, no. We never got passed kissing and we kinda decided we weren't ready to be in a serious relationship, so we remained friends. I mean... yeah, there were a few times that we could've done it, but we just didn't go that far.

Kim: Okay, then what about Tara? You must of known she was majorly crushing on you for the longest time. Right?

Ron: I really like Tara and thought of going out with her. A lot, actually. But I guess I never summoned up the courage to really go up to her and ask her out.

Kim: Then what about Yori? She was definitely interested in you? Did she and you possibly...?

Ron: No, KP, we didn't. I would've asked Yori out, but there never seemed to be a good enough time. And it doesn't help that we're literally continents away.

Kim: All right, then. How about the time you and Monique were partners while working on the project in Science? Or when you two would hang out or go to those wrestling events?

Ron: Kim, I swear to you that Monique and I didn't do anything while we were hanging out together. We're friends. And, besides, it's not like she'd be interested in me in that kind of way, right? At least I don't think so.

Kim: What about Penny? She seemed to be really into you after the incident with Drakken's Truth Ray.

Ron: Yeah, I... I wish I talked to her a bit more, but I kinda thought maybe she wouldn't be interested in me anymore. It could be just me and my lack of self confidence and courage to ask her out, too, so...

Kim: I'm gonna hate to ask this, but you wouldn't have happened to have sex with Bonnie...?

Ron: Kim, no offense, but if I didn't know any better, I'd be certain you've lost your mind. I mean, come on, KP! You know Bonnie doesn't like me, much less want to do... well, you know.

Adrena Lynn: What about Amelia? Did you get freaky with her? *She pouts and cross her arms in jealousy.*

Ron: How do you know about her? And, no, nothing happened between us.

Shego: So... I'm guessing you didn't bang Kim's Mom or your wheelchair friend's Mom either, huh?

Ron: No! I didn't! I swear!

Shego: So... you really are a virgin, huh?

Ron: Um... yeah. That's what I've been saying this whole time. Yes, I, Ron Stoppable, am a virgin and have never had sex. Okay, now, is everyone happy?

*A silence reigned in Ron Stoppable's room for what felt like an eternity. Then, suddenly,  smiles form on the lovely faces of Shego, Kim and Adrena Lynn as their focus remained solely on the blond hero in the bed before them. Ron instantly became a bit more nervous, realizing he was cornered and laying back on the bed with three gorgeous women practically right on top of him. He could do nothing as Shego boldly makes the first move, straddling his hips with her own and grinding herself against his groin in a very lustful, sensual manner.*

Shego: Tell me, Master... Since you're a virgin... How long do you wanna be one?

Ron: I-I-I... S-S-Shego... W-W-We...

Kim: Hold on a sec! What makes you believe you should be the first to have sex with Ron?!

Adrena Lynn: Yeah! That's not freaking fair!

Shego: Because I'm the one he desires the most! Isn't that right, Ronnie? *She grasps his face gently in her hands, her emerald irises gazing deeply into Ron's chocolate-brown orbs even as their lips nearly touch.*

*It was that instant, before Ron and Shego's lips could meet in a passionate kiss, that Kim and Adrena Lynn lunged forward. The collision knocks all four of them off the bed, sending them tumbling to the floor. It was then that Rufus hopped up on Ron's bed with a bag of cheese snacks, sat down, and watched on in amusement as Kim, Shego and Adrena Lynn wrestled with one another.*

Rufus: *Hnk!* Oh, boy...

Ron: *He pulls himself back onto the bed, looking at his naked mole rat best friend.* Word of advice, Rufus, old pal... Never get caught in the middle of a Kim, Shego and Adrena Lynn fight. Because someone always gets hurt... And it's usually me.

Rufus: Uh-huh. Fight! Fight! Fight! Boom! Big ouch! *Chuckles*

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