It's all breaking down

We see around us, the current system breaking down. As it always had to. So many lies, so much deceit, so much corruption. People are waking up but slowly. Those that have been awake for some time are being sent to jail for speaking the truth.

I am behind on my Vlogs. 1st day of my period today. I stood out of bed at 1pm, heavy with pain. What comes up for me during this time is unprocessed anger. This is what most likely creates the pain.

My conditioned parents plugged me into a society that goes against our nature to conform with the system, because that is what they were taught to do. To obey the elite, and fit in with the sheep.

Obviously as a spirit visiting this human world I knew from an early age that something was very wrong. Our natural authentic selves were being repressed and we were encouraged to be anything other than what we are. Our sexuality repressed, our creativity dampened, our ability to think critically put into a box with what we are allowed to question and what we are not.

Now we are not allowed to question anything. Blindly follow the government and media, ignoring the warning signs of the d!ctatorsh!p rising.

in France in Paris and Montpelier there are riots against the discriminatory vacC!ne passports, the un-jaBbed are not even allowed in supermarkets (Jews/Non Jews 1939 anyone?)

You most likely won't see this on mainstream news, you will need to check out alternatives on Telegram for that.

Yes, I am upset. Deeply upset. Making videos is hard because my phone only has 16GB of storage. I really need a new phone guys, if anyone can help out with a second hand one with a bit more storage, if you have a spare one in your cupboard, we can create a reward exchange.

working has been hard. This 40degree heatwave, combined with x2 flashbacks in the last 2 weeks which often knocks me off for 2-3 days, then fighting on the frontline to try and stop these draconian laws to refuse non jabbed people to return to Malta. They turned this around at the last minute, I think they realised it was a bit too Naz! to go unnoticed. Even the EU spoke up. But over in France President Macron, the president is named after their national biscuit, what great promotion! has started the apartheid. My niece just got home from uni where she didn't want to leave because even though she has done 2 lockdowns and it was tough, she is finding her self away from home, only to return to home for the summer and find that summer is cancelled. I am angry on her behalf and i feel the deep sadness of these kids who at 18 should be having the time of their lives, and instead find themselves in the middle of a war, where all their freedoms have been cancelled.

I am also sad on a personal level. This Italien man came into my life and made it bright for ten days of intimacy. But his girlfriend dumped him only two weeks before because he doesn't want a family (he's already had one) and he's recovering and needs space. after he has taken space I don't know if he will come back to me or not and i am grieving this shake up. it always effects me so emotionally. It is hard for me to stay positive, but I must.

There is much to be done. After investing over a decade on healing myself I know that all dis-ease in the body can be cured naturally. I have seen better results from healing cancer with alkaline diet and seed nutrition than from chemo, which most doctors wouldn't take themselves. So on that score, I trust my body to heal itself, I trust I can support others, but there are many areas I am not prepared for this war where the un-jAbbed will be sacrificed and refused entry to buy food etc. It was always predicted, in the bible it says "no one can buy or sell unless he has the mark" which is exactly what is happening, no one can buy or sell unless they have the QR code, which in Russia is being tattooed on their arm, temporarily, for now, but it is symbolic. Later the jab passport will become a micro chip entered under the skin, unless we stop it. So I do need to increase my income, I may need to buy land or go live off grid with those that have land, as eventually the non jabBD will be denied access to normal society, it is already happening in France as quickly as it happened in 1939 to the Jews. There are many people against this and millions marched in London, if you haven't seen it because the mainstream news lied and pretended it was a few hundred! Try one million! Then I can hook you up with where to find this news if you're interested.

So yes, it's hard to work, it's hard to feel good. I often feel anxious. i live alone without any more resources than what Patreon permits me to pay for rent and food. I am "working" whenever i can, building new projects with the intention for them to become income, it's slow, I work many hours for free with no income from these projects, and it is hard to keep my energy up, especially when what is going on around me is so depressing. I don't want to leave Gozo right now, but I want the option to leave, and to return if i wish. This is my new home afterall. I also want the option to travel and find other places to live. Many friends are choosing Portugal (to have access to mainland Europe and not be on a small island with no access to water) and others are thinking Costa Rica because they don't have military and the assumption is that it would be peaceful. but then the military will be stepping up and force jabbing people like some dystopian nightmare, like they are doing in India, and then who knows where would be safe. Canada sounds like a nightmare and my friend loves living there but her boyfriend wants to escape to Costa Rica and none of us know when the right to escape is...or whether if we sit like boiling frogs if we miss our boat? The only thing I am doing is living day by day, with all my heavy feelings, going to swim in the sea daily and keeping on keeping on....

But yes, with a heavy heart, and today a heavy womb, I bleed a whole ton of sadness.

I will have new Vlogs today, but please excuse my unreliability, I will keep my word of making all 30 Vlogs and I may even continue because it feels good to be back and have a voice, and I want to have a voice as long as I can until censorship. 

You can always write to me to encourage me with ideas of what you want me to vlog about as my patron @nic did today. Yes I will talk about my article on sex work, and my thoughts.

OK Guys, I need to make a coffee, and then I will start uploading my Vlog.

If you haven't signed up to the 30 day Vlogging then upgrade to the $25 tier. There are about 19 vlogs so far!

love

Suze

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