Chapter 107: His Choice

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“Women… Quite frankly, I think you would be better without them, Boss. Most of them’re definitely gonna try and kill you one day.”

— The words spoken by a drunk alchemist to a certain Master, many centuries ago

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Lianshi’s aura was suffocating. 

Even if her wrath was not directed at him, it was impossible not to be affected by her rage. Her qi was a flood of bloodlust. It made his body turn upon itself, organs wilting as his brain blanked with fear.

Feng struggled to breathe. He tried cycling his qi, but it was a futile effort. Lianshi was a maelstrom of hate, her power eclipsing everything. The effects were akin to the Botulvorn Beast, but here, he was trapped beneath the reptilian wing of her half-transformed state, far too close to her.

Then the Matriarch moved.

A crack. A flash. Feng’s mind could barely keep up as his body was suddenly flung to the side. He smashed through a nearby tree and only stopped when his body cracked against another. 

He reinforced his body in time to reduce the damage. Disoriented but minimally harmed, the Young Master was on his feet the next second, qi bursting into flames.

His readiness was not needed. The battle — such as it was — was already over.

Where once was a field of gentle grass and flowers, an enormous crater now filled the meadow where he stood less than five seconds ago. Severed scything tendrils littered the grounds, some already diced into a dozen bleeding stumps. They twitched impotently as blood splattered all over hissing soil. 

An exchange had taken place, one where blows and slashes were traded in the span of eyeblinks. Though he had been unable to witness the fight, the result was clear to see.

Matriarch Zijing’s arms were gone, as was her entire lower torso. Her upper remains were dangling off the giant horn-like protrusion of a multi-winged limb jetting from Lianshi’s back. 

His Fiancée’s face was streaked with black blood, teeth bared with fangs and razor canines. Additional insect eyes twitched from her arms, back, and neck, their lids closing and fusing back to perfect flesh now that the threat was eliminated.

“I warned you,” Lianshi hissed. “And still, you tried. You tried to kill him, right in front of me!”

A choking laugh. The limbless upper torso of the Matriarch twitched. Her head turned, still veiled with black silk. 

“I tried to save him from you. A pity. Had you truly loved him, you would have allowed me to grant him that kindness,” the Matriarch murmured weakly.

“His fate is his own,” Lianshi snarled, her voice inhuman and monstrous. “His to choose. His to decide! Whether he wants me or not, whether he wishes me in his life or not! I will never deny him that right! NEVER! Neither you, nor I, nor anyone else will take that freedom from him!” 

Lianshi’s wing split down the middle, turning it into two razor talons. Her mother’s remains were likewise torn apart as the horn lancing her body separated, cleaving the Matriarch’s once more in two.

The moment the mutilated body fell to the ground, they twisted and transformed. The individual pieces of flesh grew twitching limbs: some human-like with fingers and pale skin, others insectoid with stick-like appendages. They scuttled away, moving faster than their size would suggest. In seconds, they had all fled the field.

Lianshi did not bother giving chase. Her wings were already folding back into her back. Her black bodysuit was torn, but curiously, the silk fabric was already knitting itself back. 

A superior version of her Sect attire, most likely. Perhaps even crafted by the Eight-Eyed Weaver herself. Feng recognised the exceptional material of it.

The Young Miss walked over to Feng, moving with deliberate slowness compared to the lightning-fast strikes she performed earlier. She kept a small distance from him as the Young Master cautiously stood.

“I’m sorry for throwing you so harshly,” she apologised hesitantly. “Mother was already poised to strike, and I had to get you out of the way quick, before…”

Feng nodded. “It’s alright. I understand. Thank you for saving me.”

The two of them did not move. Lianshi’s expression was vulnerable, so different from the earlier ferocity she displayed.

When Feng took a cautious step towards her, she flinched back. The Young Master stopped.

“Lianshi, are you alright?” he asked carefully. “Your Mother, did she manage to hurt you?”

The Young Miss shook her head. “Nothing that will last. I have already healed the damage. The ones I gave her, however… Those will be there for a while.”

A spike of feral rage flashed through her eyes. Despite himself, Feng’s feet instinctively shuffled back.

Lianshi noticed. The heat in her eyes faded. She winced. “I’m sorry. Sorry I showed you that side of me. Sorry for Mother… Because of me, you almost died. Again.”

The Young Miss looked ready to bolt, or even cry. Feng sucked in a slow breath.

“Well, I almost died two days ago too, so really, that’s not anything new,” Feng coughed, smiling sheepishly. “To be honest, this near-death experience is at least made more pleasant by your presence.”

“You…” Lianshi struggled to find the words.

While she hesitated, Feng closed the gap between them. Lianshi did not run.

His arms reached for her and pulled her into a hug. 

“I’m glad you are alright,” he murmured.

“That should be my line, idiot,” she whispered, eyes closing as she leaned against him. Her head rested on his shoulders as her arms pulled him close. “Everything is my fault.”

“I really don’t see how. If anything, the fault lies with me,” Feng murmured. “A proper husband should not make his wife worry about his safety.”

“We are not married yet,” she whispered. Feng stiffened.

Her words did not bode well. It was the first time she acknowledged the marriage as anything less than an absolute certainty.

“What happened?” Feng asked. Lianshi’s arms slipped away from him, and she took a step back. The Young Master grabbed her hand. “Talk to me. Please.”

“Talk?” she laughed bleakly. “Now you want to talk? After you avoided me for weeks, no matter what I did or tried? You… You were…”

The Young Miss closed her eyes.

“No, that’s not fair of me,” she whispered. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t say that. I know you don’t want to hurt me. Not really.”

“But I ended up hurting you anyway,” Feng admitted softly. “I ignored you, even when I should be spending time with you. You could tell I was afraid. Angry. Because of this marriage. Because… of you.”

Lianshi flinched. Her shoulders fell. “You never wanted to marry me. Not when you heard about the engagement. Not when we started becoming intimate. And not… not even now. After all the time we spent together.”

“I do now,” he argued. “There is no more doubt in my mind.”

“Liar,” she snarled, forcefully pulling her hand from him. “I’m not stupid. I can see it in your eyes. You are afraid. You are still afraid. You have never loved me! Not once! And the only reason you are sticking to this marriage is for politics!”

She stepped away from him. Feng tried to reach out again, but the look in her eyes stopped him dead.

Spirit realm, First Step… If she wanted him dead, he would be killed before his brain noticed.

“No, it’s not even for politics, is it? Not even for personal gain or cultivation,” she laughed mockingly. “You never really cared about any of that. This is because of responsibility. Because you pity me, the little girl who once followed in your footsteps and can’t give up on her first love. And I can’t tell if that’s worse or better than if you had simply persisted in this arrangement because of simple lust or greed!”

“I…” Feng could not find the words to retort.

“Everyone told me that I didn’t need to worry,” Lianshi harshly whispered. “They told me I was beautiful, powerful, and destined for Immortal greatness. Only a fool would deny himself the chance to stand by my side. For months and years, I waited. That adoring spark I see in every male gaze, every man I ever come across, be they from the Outer or Inner Province… I waited to see it appear in your eyes. But it never came.”

Her hands were clenched into fists. When she opened her eyes and looked at him, Feng despaired at the hurt he saw within them.

“No matter what I did — whether it was in your bed, in your company, and even when I was fighting my suitors, my Sect, and my Mother with every step towards this marriage — I was always, always, inadequate in your eyes! Never enough! Just fear from you, day and night! And you did not have the courage to even tell me why!” 

Lianshi shouted, her bottled-up emotions finally giving voice to painful grievances. Her rampant aura leaked out, flattening the grass and turning the shadows into maw-shaped figures.

Feng said nothing. However, neither did he run nor flinch. 

“Why?” she asked despairingly. “Why can’t you love me?”

He stood there, silent.

“Answer me!” Lianshi cried. “You owe me this much! The man I love is not a coward!”

Faced with her words, even then, Feng hesitated.

If he told Lianshi the truth… Would she still be true to herself?

“No more running, Zhong. Have faith in her.”

“She is not without her pride to hold her true.”

Feng resolved himself.

“... If you do not think me a coward, Lianshi, then you do not know me that well at all.”