Amazon Apocalypse 5: Chapter 56

Crafting a Probability Engine was no easy feat, even for a Kindling Architect. In ancient times, a craftsman like me would buy most of the subcomponents they planned to use.

It was like Carl Sagan said, “To bake a cake from scratch, you must first invent the universe.”

Thankfully, I wasn’t starting completely from scratch. The raw copper and titanium I had access to from salvage was at least on par with what the blueprint called for. The computational engines pulled out of a computer were actually of higher quality than what I needed.

In total, there were about two dozen Architect inventions that I needed to build before I could even start work on the Probability Engine itself, and any one of them would have been a revolution on par with the steam engine or the semiconductor if they had been invented before the integration.

“So that’s how cultivator antigravity works...” I muttered as I held my hand out. Above it, a small piece of glass hovered in the air.

Another subcomponent exploited quantum mechanics to perform actions at a distance. And one more interacted with the user in the dimension of the kindling, providing a mental link with the user on the same level as the System.

I had a few false starts, so I needed to make a dozen copies of every subcomponent. Fortunately, the System’s blueprints were extensive, and nothing was actually all that hard to find here in Crownhill with plenty of scrap from Earth nearby.

Anywhere else in the Arcadia Multiverse though? Forget it. Even the computational engines would be practically impossible to find. But I had hundreds of them stacked up in my room in the form of old laptops and graphics cards.

I got the distinct impression that the System had selected this blueprint just for me, after going through thousands of and picking out the one that I could most easily make.

The next two days passed in a frenzy of creation, which even I only halfway understood. Mimiko and Reluna checked in on me more than once, but when they saw I was busy, they attended to their own projects. The council didn’t disturb me either, which was nice.

I finished the Probability Engine first, but somewhere along the way, I finished making the new sets of Mark Two armor, adding in the last of the upgrades for my Doomblade Armor, and even snuck in some upgrades to Doomseeker.

I hadn’t actually been planning to redesign Doomseeker, just add a few new magical focus’ in there and attach a couple more B-Grade monster cores. But as I worked on the Probability Engine, I realized I’d need a way to carry it.

When the engine was finished, it wouldn’t exist entirely in mundane space, which meant I couldn’t exactly hold it in my hands. The blueprints I was looking at revealed ways it could be integrated with the tip of a wand or the head of a staff, and since I needed to work on Doomseeker, I realized I might as well put the Probability Engine there.

Now, my favorite ebony staff looked even more sinister. It had always seemed like a withered tree with monster cores dangling from its branches, but now there was a certain sense of impossibility to it. Staring at it too long strained the eyes, like peering into things humans weren’t meant to know. I could only assume that effect would grow more pronounced with the difference in grade. I’d have to come up with a way to shield it from the eyes of D-Grades and lower, or I risked driving my own allies insane whenever I pulled out my staff.

But that was a minor price to pay for the effects of the Probability Engine. Now that it was completed, I saw why the System recommended it to me.

Probability Engine (Legendary)

This device stores and captures all of the user’s ill karma. When the moment is right, the scales shall be rebalanced in full, forging victory from defeat.

This item’s effect on fate increases the more unlucky circumstances the wielder encounters. If you are ambushed, surprised, outnumbered, or outmatched, you will find your spells striking true and hidden paths to victory revealing themselves.

In a way, the Probability Engine could almost be considered an item on par with my Living Paradox skill. It would get stronger the tighter the bind I was in. How it would help me seemed strange and esoteric, but based on the System’s description, the worse my luck was, the bigger my eventual lucky break would be.

Mimiko had a different name for the device.

“A Life-Saving Treasure!” Mimko clapped her hands together with excited delight.

“Is that another cultivator thing?” I asked.

Mimiko nodded. “Many cultivators carry powerful teleportation talismans or unique pills that bolster their movement speed and abilities for brief periods. These are the kinds of secret and precious items meant to save a cultivator’s life when she is against long odds, and all else seems hopeless. You would only reveal their existence to your dao companion and only expend them when out of options.”

“Neat. You want one? I made a few of them,” I asked Mimiko.

Mimiko gaped. “Y-you can just make Life-Saving treasures? They’re supposed to be artifacts of tremendous power valuable beyond measure! The kind of thing you’re supposed to battle through waves of monsters or plunder ancient tombs to collect!”

I chuckled. “Or... you can make them in your barn. If you’re me, that is. So I ask again, do you want one?”

Mimiko didn’t believe me, but just then, Reluna appeared, raising her hand.

“Me! Me! I want!” She pleaded. I raised an eyebrow, and she coughed to regain her usual regal composure. Or at least, what would have been regal composure if she wasn’t still wearing her talisman trash bag.

“I would be most grateful for a powerful artifact such as this,” Reluna said.

I chuckled again, louder this time. “Sure. I already made one for each of you. Just tell me where you want them. I need something to attach them to through interdimensional space.”

I withdrew two formless masses of maddening something. Both women’s eyes were drawn to the writhing mass of void magic. I quickly put them away before they caused any real damage, but both women only seemed to grow more excited for their moment of staring into the Probability Engine’s physical forms.

Naturally, I’d built enough for all my companions. I’d made a dozen of every subcomponent, so it was elementary to assemble a few more when I finally figured out how they all fit together. I was wary about giving away too many since there might be a way to circumvent the effects of these things if people knew what they were, but there was no reason not to give one to every member of my close circle. Their effects were completely passive and could easily save a life.

“I would like mine on this,” Mimiko said, gesturing to a small gemstone earring. It was tiny and very understated, which suited a life-saving treasure well. She wouldn’t want to draw attention to the Probability Engine.

“Does it have to be attached to an item?” Reluna asked.

I frowned, thinking and shrugging. “Not necessarily, but I don’t know how your body will react to having something shoved into the same extradimensional space your soul occupies. What were you thinking of?”

Without further explanation, Reluna disrobed. It was so fast and sudden that I was blinking in surprise when she pointed to her hairless crotch. There was something there I didn’t remember from before. It was a brief line of decorative text written in a swirling crescent pattern that extended across her groin.

It looked like a talisman pattern to me, but in the center of it all, there was clear and legible text written in the tongue of the Architects Reluna and I had worked so hard to study together, as of late.

“I want it bound to this marking. I might as well get something after you made me get this mark, you ravenous beast of a lab assistant,” Reluna said as she ran her fingers across the fresh tattoo that I definitely didn’t remember making her get.

“Reluna, I definitely didn’t make you get that,” I said.

“Of course you did. You must have forgotten,” Reluna said, cheeks flushing. I narrowed my eyes. She’d gotten this sexual tattoo herself and was now trying to pretend I’d made her get it. I frowned as I recognized the design as the kind you'd usually find on a succubus in media. Perhaps I'd given her too much access to the internet. Somebody in Crownhill had a particularly freaky collection on a public server.

Mimiko also narrowed her eyes as she crouched down and stared at Reluna’s crotch. She could also read the ancient script. “This says ‘Property of Carter.’”

“Isn’t he a ravenous beast? I can’t believe he would force an innocent, upstanding, and scholarly young woman like myself to get such a humiliating tattoo.” Reluna shook her head, still naked but now with a fierce blush covering her face.

Mimiko scoffed. “Put your clothes back on, you exhibitionist. You’re making the floors slippery. And no one will believe Lord Carter would make you get such a thing. He is known far and wide as a kind-hearted and honorable lord. He is the pinnacle of virtue and a template of masculinity. An icon to aspire to and a hero to the downtrodden...”

I waved Mimiko to continue while I worked on embedding Reluna’s Probability Engine into her tattoo. I would have to check on it in a month or so to make sure the extradimensional space was holding together firmly. The tattoo didn’t give me much room to work with, but I was pretty sure I was good enough to fold space neatly despite that.

It was also impressive to see how long Mimiko could keep talking me up. She went on for several minutes without interruption. Cultivators really were masters in the art of ass-kissing.

“From my tests, the item will glow when you’re in danger,” I said. Mimiko fingered her ear piercing. Meanwhile, Reluna rubbed her abdomen with an unusually satisfied expression.

***

Not long after that, our brief period of respite before the next stage of the integration came to an end. The only warning we received was a brief System message.

Please hold while the barriers around your shard are removed.

And like that, some of the distant blue walls that had been there so long they felt like we’re part of the horizon dissolved into nothingness.

Several barriers on all sides of us opened up, including those long corridors leading to the shards we’d so recently conquered.

What had once been Crownhill, connected to several narrow passageways, was now a vast expanse of open terrain. I had expected our shard to expand, but not as much as it suddenly had.

Crownhill’s immediate territory had been roughly the size of Rhode Island before the last integration. The four other shards we’d been joined with had been largely a bit smaller than us, though that was partially because the Naga shard went so far underwater and the Torchdragon’s shard had a large area within the volcano.

The long stretches of open terrain between Crownhill and those enemy shards had been between five and fifteen miles long. Now, those had been integrated, along with a space far beyond them. Using my thumb to gauge the distance, I guessed the new shard was somewhere between the size of Australia and the North American continent.

“Alright, ladies, looks like we have some scouting to do. If there’s anything extremely hostile, I want to know about it before I leave,” I said.

“Consider it done, Carter. I’ll organize the scouting expeditions,” Sakura said.

“Thanks, Sakura, you’re in charge,” I replied absentmindedly before quickly whipping my head around to see Sakura standing behind me. Bridget was right next to her.

“I’ve been doing a lot of cooking lately, and my team back on Ladwick made a lot of good stuff. I’d like to give them away to the people of Crownhill and the poor Omykir communities if that’s alright?” Bridget asked. She had her hair in a bun and was wearing an apron dusty with flour.

I blinked in surprise, taking in the two of them.

“You two are back? Since when?”

“Since the notification appeared. Apparently, the System wanted them here for the next stage of their integration,” Reluna explained.

I shook my head, surprised I’d missed the two appearing behind me. But not surprised enough that I didn’t sweep the pair of them up into a warm embrace.

“It’s good to see you both again,” I said.

“It’s nice to be home,” Bridget said, returning the hug as she planted a kiss on my cheek.

“Although we left suddenly and unexpectedly. There’s a bit of a mess back on Ladwick from our departure,” Sakura warned.

“I see. We’ll be quick, then. You two will probably have to stay here for some time. When I return to the front lines, I will deal with any issues you might have left behind. Your two organizations were largely camp followers and civilians, so I shouldn’t need any official authority to take control of them.”

I spoke briefly with Bridget and Sakura about what was happening in Ladwick. The rest of the campaign had gone smoothly from the sound of things, just as I’d predicted. Prince Herius was nearly finished liberating the entire world of cultivators.

“Good. As for the situation in Crownhill, I think it’ll be easier to explain what’s happened while I give you the full tour,” I held out my hand, which Sakura reached out to take.

“Ahem. This arm is taken!” Reluna said, slipping in and grabbing my arm in the blink of an eye.

Sakura’s eyebrow twitched in annoyance, and the two women glared at one another competitively.

Bridget grabbed my other arm and planted a kiss on my cheek.

“I see Mimiko and Reluna have made themselves at home. Good for you. Though, we’ll naturally have to lay down some ground rules. This household won’t run itself.” Bridget flashed me a warm smile.

“Everybody gets along just fine, don’t they? I’m sure Mimiko and Reluna will fit in perfectly,” I replied.

Bridget smiled again, patting my cheek. “Of course, dear. Your home will always be a worry-free sanctuary for you. You can trust us to see to the little details while you run around saving the world and curing cancer and whatever else needs doing.”

I wasn’t quite sure what Bridget meant by that, but when I turned around again, Reluna was unconscious on the floor with a big red welt on her head, and Sakura had my arm. Mimiko was nowhere to be found.

“Is she going to be alright?” I asked, gesturing to Reluna.

“She’s fine. Now, that tour?” Sakura asked. She wore a bright, wide smile that was a bit too wide.

Ultimately, I shrugged and took the two ladies off on their tour. As long as I could rest my head and everyone around me seemed happy, I was pleased with how things went. The details of how exactly my household ran behind closed doors were something I was happy to delegate.

<Note>

Still trying to finish stuff up. I have one more chapter in reserve, so you guys will definitely get a Friday chapter. Saturday is up in the air still. Edits are going fairly well, and I rewrote some of Mimiko's early scenes. If she uses an ultimate attack in future chapters named 'Lonely Maiden Tickles the Dragon' know that it is something I added in editing. It is a serious attack to her, though Carter thinks it is a joke technique for obvious reasons. It will make sense in the final version, but if it comes up I'll make sure to explain it more thoroughly for patreon-only readers.