ROBs and Sidekicks

An: Holiday events screwed up my schedule and I got person napped by family friends... 

Myst nearly knocked his glass of raspberry cider on the floor when he heard a knock on the door to his room. 'What the hell?' He walked over and opened the door and stared in shock as an unfamiliar pink haired girl wearing pajamas with ducks covering them was standing in the hallway rubbing sleep out of her eyes.

"What?" Myst sputtered as the girl sort of stumbled past him into the computer room.

The girl glanced around then nodded and smiled, as if satisfied with her findings. "You're just the sort of person I've been looking for."

"Do you need help?" Myst asked as he took a couple of steps closer to the window so he could look down at the driveway and try to figure out where the obviously lost child had come from.

"Yep! My name is Susie, and I’m the archdemon of sloth," the girl said in a voice that didn't sound like a child's voice.

Myst spun around and stared when there was a half naked pink haired teenage girl with duck themed blue panties standing where the girl had been the last time he'd looked. "Ah… demon?"

The girl yawned. "Of sloth. Try to keep up. I've run out of isekai to watch, which means I’m going to create my own Isekai and you’re going to be one of the main characters."

Myst shivered despite the heat as he opened his mouth to ask if she was serious and he could feel a thousand eyes watching him in the dark even though it wasn't dark out. "I get powers, right?"

"Beyond eternal youth and the chance to visit another world, nope but that's what makes it fun," Susie replied with amusement.

"Give me one good reason not to pull a Charles and tell you to," Myst paused as he realized he should reword Charles' typical response to ROBs, "politely find someone else?"

"I'll give you three, hot naked girls, eternal youth and the possibility of picking up magic." Susie snapped her fingers and conjured a busty and quite naked attractive teenager with wild blue hair and purple eyes.

Hermione blinked as she went from detention with Umbridge to being in an unfamiliar room with a naked pink haired girl and a dark haired man in jean shorts and a greyish green t-shirt. "What the hell?"

Myst did his best to focus on the pink haired demon rather than the girl that looked like a taller and bustier combination of the girl that played Hermione and the girl that played Sabrina on the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina if you ignored her hair and eye color.

"Hmm…" Susie trailed off as she realized that Hermione's magic hadn't come with her. "Well shit, we might have a bit of a problem."

"You mean beyond the fact that you kidnapped me and stole my clothes!" Hermione snapped.

"Yeah, I sort of misplaced your magic but don't worry, I can fix it." Susie snapped her fingers and conjured some silver bracelets on Hermione's wrists. "Hmm, close enough."

"What do you mean close enough?" Hermione demanded, starting to wonder if someone had slipped something into her butterbeer.

Susie yawned. "Not quite the same as wizardry but that's half the fun."

"What!" Hermione demanded.

Susie conjured an index card and handed it to Hermione. "This should explain the rest of the details." She turned to look at Myst. "Just say my name three times in a row and slap your ass when you want to get dropped into your starting world."

"Are you going to tell us which world we're getting dropped into?" Myst asked, fairly sure the answer was no but figuring he'd ask.

"Too much work," Susie replied with a yawn. "Speaking of work, on the off chance that you need someone destroyed, I sent your friend Phil a care package filled with useful powers."

"What…" Myst trailed off as Susie vanished, leaving him alone with an annoyed girl with magic.

"Who the hell was that?" Hermione demanded.

Myst glanced down at Hermione's breasts then pulled his attention back to her face. "An archdemon of sloth and she ran out of things to watch. Where did she grab you from?"

"Detention with Umbridge..." Hermione trailed off as she noticed his flat screen monitor and the glass panel on his computer. "Where did you get the monitor?"

"From a surplus sale a couple of years ago," Myst replied after taking a couple of seconds to remember where he'd picked it up. 'Detention with Umbridge?'

Hermione glanced out the window and frowned when she noticed all of the green trees and blackberries on the hill and the fact that one of the windows was open. "Where are we?"

"Assuming she didn't drop my house somewhere, Washington State," Myst replied absently as he tried to figure out what the hell he was supposed to do about getting a demon's attention or the fact that magic was apparently real.

Hermione stared at the old faded Duke Nukem mouse pad his futuristic mouse was sitting on, fairly sure a wizard wouldn't know enough to fake it. "What's the date?"

"July First, 2021," Myst replied, curious how that lined up with her world.

Hermione stared at Myst, trying to figure out if he was joking. "It should be 1995."

"Check the copyrights on the books," Myst suggested as he gestured towards the gaming books on the desk. "Or play with the net," he offered as he gestured towards his computer chair.

Hermione glanced between the books and the computer. "You're taking this rather well."

"How am I supposed to take it?" Myst asked. "If someone had asked me if magic was real ten minutes ago, I'd have said no."

"You don't believe in magic?" Hermione asked.

"Now? Sure, ten minutes ago, not so much," Myst admitted. "Either way, I'm Myst, can I get a name?"

"Hermione Granger," Hermione replied as she glanced over the card.

"Nice to meet you. Anything useful?" Myst asked, wondering what they had to work with.

"Assuming this isn't a joke, the bracelets give me the ability to open portals to fictional universes and I've got a knack for Divination, Elementalism, Enchanting and Summoning magic and an 80% resistance to those fields. Unfortunately, the more clothes I'm wearing, the worse the bracelets work, which means the demon is probably a pervert."

"She's a demon," Myst replied with a shrug.

"I'm also supposed to say boxes." Hermione glanced between the two trunks that appeared out of thin air then walked over and opened the one with her name on it. "Boots, yellow polka dot bikini bottoms, a belt with pouches, two rings, sunglasses, a tiara and a sword."

"If it helps, I have an extra shirt you can have," Myst replied as he opened his trunk. "Blood red sword, bracelets, a belt and pouches, sunglasses, two rings, boots that look suspiciously like my boots and a jester's cap I haven't seen in years." He reached down and grabbed the note card on top of the pile. "Any gear I'm carrying when they summon me will be indestructible and never run out of energy and I need to save a girl."

"That's it?" Hermione asked as she held her hand out for his card.

Myst checked the back then handed her the card. "Pretty much."

Hermione glanced over the card then handed it back. "I'm going to have to call my parents, how do I explain missing the last twenty five years?"

"No clue," Myst admitted as he reached up and grabbed his copy of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone off the shelf and handed it to her. "Unfortunately or fortunately, it's slightly more problematic than just calling England."

Hermione stared at the book. "They wrote a book about Harry's adventures? Is it any…" she trailed off when she recalled what he'd said about not believing in magic. "What do you mean?"

"I'm reasonably sure that you're from an alternate world because there's no way the wizarding world could maintain the statue of secrecy with cameras everywhere and I can't see the Ministry of Magic letting someone publish anything close to the truth. Not to mention your power implies there are multiple worlds."

Hermione took a breath then let it out. "Why me?"

"You're probably my favorite character in the series," Myst admitted. "Ron needs more motivation and Harry needs to learn when to tell people to go to hell and push idiots down the stairs like Umbridge."

"It would have made things easier," Hermione admitted. "Do you have any suggestions for fixing the wizarding world?"

"Beyond sneaking in with a ring of invisibility from Dungeons & Dragons and killing Umbridge and Fudge, not really. It depends on how your world lines up with the books but I can probably tell you how to kill Voldemort, assuming we don't just skip around the multiverse and collect magical items and spells we can use to obliterate him."

"My powers didn't come with an instruction manual," Hermione pointed out.

Myst pulled his attention away from her breasts, glad that she was paying more attention to the book he'd handed her. "Which is why we'll have to do some experimenting. If you can open a portal to any fictional universe we should be able to get a decent collection of gear which should help us collect the magical items we need to acquire magic."

"That's a lot of shoulds," Hermione argued as she finished skimming the section about Harry's confrontation with Voldemort then closed the book and set it on Myst's computer desk. "That matches with what Harry said and I can't see him telling anyone that would put it in a book."

"I know," Myst admitted. "Let's assume you can open a portal back to Hogwarts, do you have the skills or powers to go back to being a witch right now?"

"No," Hermione admitted.

"Which means we need to figure out a way to get your magic back, I've got a couple of ideas," Myst assured her.

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "How?"

"I know a world where we can find power stealing daggers, we just need enough gear or magic to survive stealing them from a couple of demons," Myst explained as he started pulling gear out of his trunk.

"What type of demons?" Hermione asked warily.

"The magic using type which means we're going to have to do things in stages," Myst replied as he put his new sunglasses on. He smiled as a heads up display appeared on his glasses when he looked at his sword. "Nice, this might not take as long as I thought."

Hermione turned to look at Myst. "Why is that?"

Myst laughed as he thought about all of the weapons he could absorb in Diablo. "Because my glasses have a heads up display and identification function and my sword absorbs other weapons for power and alternate forms without acquiring their negatives."

"Sounds like a more impressive version of the Sword of Gryffindor," Hermione said thoughtfully.

"Yep," Myst replied as he mentally unsummoned it, causing it to vanish.

Hermione stared at where his sword used to be. "What happened?"

"It also comes with the ability to summon and unsummon it," Myst replied as he looked over the rest of his gear.

"I wish I could do that with my wand," Hermione admitted then sighed as she realized she didn't have a wand anymore. "Or my magic," she grumbled as she picked up her sunglasses. "Are these the same as yours?"

Myst checked her sunglasses. "Libra and identify, they'll also keep you from being blinded by flash grenades and let you see in the dark."

"Libra?" Hermione asked as she put the glasses on.

"It basically lets you analyse monsters for weaknesses and special qualities," Myst replied as he started putting his gear on after grabbing a pair of socks from the dresser. "We shouldn't have any trouble dealing with the first couple of levels of the dungeon in Diablo."

"Let me guess, it has interesting loot?" Hermione asked as she examined her gear.

Myst finished tying his shoelaces. "On the first couple of levels? Not really but the monsters drop a decent amount of gold in the game which we can use to buy gear in other worlds. It should also have a book that teaches mana shield and a way to boost our magic so we can start casting spells."

"Mana shield?" Hermione asked as she slipped the bikini bottoms on.

Myst grinned. "It's basically a spell that protects you by applying any damage you take to your mana pool rather than your health."

"That would make exploring dungeons a lot safer. "I don't suppose you know of any way to boost magical items?" Hermione asked as she examined her rings.

"A couple," Myst mused as his HUD showed him the details on his trunk. "It just depends on how far down the rabbit hole you want to go, why?"

Hermione shook her head. "Because I'm missing some defenses. One of my rings covers cold damage and some healing while my other one boosts my magic resistance by 20% but I don't have any resistance against fire or death curses, you?"

Myst glanced down at the ring that was a perfect copy of the sapphire and gold ring he'd gotten as a graduation present. "One of them prevents monsters from regenerating any damage I do or being raised from the dead or animated and reduces the amount of damage I take from physical attacks. The other one, boosts my resistance to ranged attacks by 100% and decreases the magic damage I take by 50% so yeah, I wouldn't mind boosting the rings a bit."

"Wait, you got 50% and defense against ranged damage?" Hermione asked.

Myst shrugged. "50% reduction in damage, it doesn't do anything for esoteric effects."

"Ah," Hermione said when she realized that her ring probably boosted her bracer's magic resistance up to 100% for her specialties. "That makes sense. Where are we going first?"

"That depends on how accurate your portals are," Myst said as he walked over and sat down in front of his computer.

"No clue," Hermione admitted.

Myst clicked on the Diablo Hellfire icon to start the game. "I've got a save game with gold and books scattered on the ground, if we can jump into it, we can avoid fighting the demons in the church, if not, we'll have to kill some demons."

Hermione frowned. "Why do you have books scattered on the ground?"

Myst smiled as he loaded his last save. "Because it's a game and the character doesn't have a lot of space in their backpack."

"I guess that makes sense," Hermione admitted as she focused on her tiara and used it to change her appearance to match the rogue she could see on the screen, including her armor.

"Probably for the best," Myst admitted reluctantly.

Hermione smiled at Myst. "Don't worry, I don't mind people looking, I just don't want trouble."

"Fair enough." Myst gestured towards the screen, glad that the demon had grabbed a relaxed and slightly twisted version of Hermione. "Are you going to try to make a portal?"

"We should probably pack some sandwiches and grab a first aid kit on the off chance we get stuck or run into trouble," Hermione pointed out.

"Good point," Myst admitted as he pushed his chair back and stood up. "No point in taking chances even if the healer in town should be able to fix us up," he said as he headed out of the room and down the stairs with Hermione following behind him. "Tuna sandwiches or peanut butter and jelly?"

"Either is fine," Hermione replied as she glanced at the room with a high ceiling that contained a comfortable couch and a desk with an extremely thin looking laptop on it. "Is that a laptop?"

"Yeah, technology has improved a bit in the last twenty five years," Myst replied as he walked through the open door and took a left into the bathroom to grab the first aid kit and the bottle of rubbing alcohol for disinfecting things. "Mostly."

"Mostly?" Hermione asked.

Myst stuffed the kit and the bottle in his belt pouch then walked back out and headed down the hallway. "I'm not really a fan of cars that basically crumple when you bump them because they're basically plastic coated metal frames."

"Safety features or cost cutting?" Hermione asked as she glanced around Myst's living room.

"Technically the first one," Myst replied as he headed over to the kitchen to start making sandwiches. "Cars used to be able to survive bumping into things without more than a couple of dents, now they mostly just crumple and you basically write the car off because it costs an insane amount to fix."

"Sounds annoying," Hermione agreed as she walked over to look at the strange collection of colorful plastic cases on a shelf. "What are these?"

Myst turned to look. "Movies, they're basically better CDs."

"Sounds better than tapes. Do you mind if I look through them?" Hermione asked.

"Go for it," Myst replied as he went back to making sandwiches.

0o0o0

Myst grinned when Hermione's bracelets glowed with purple fire and a glowing purple portal opened on the back porch showing a familiar looking man with a grey robe and white hair standing by a fountain.

"Strange," Deckard Cain whispered when he noticed the people on the other side of the strange portal that had suddenly appeared in the middle of town.

"Are you having a problem with monsters?" Myst asked, wondering if they'd hit the right point in time.

"There have been strange noises from under the monastery, a sorcerer went in to check it out an hour ago but he hasn't come back yet," Deckard replied.

"Lovely. Ready?" Myst asked Hermione.

"Not really, this is more Harry's gig," Hermione admitted as she walked through the portal.

"Point," Myst admitted as he followed her through the portal, hoping they weren't making a mistake. He glanced around the village square, more than a little disappointed but not particularly surprised that there weren't books, magical items and gold scattered everywhere.

Hermione glanced at the bald blacksmith that was leaning up against his anvil watching them then started walking down the path towards the monastery. "Let's get this over with."

"We'll let you know what we find," Myst assured Deckard then followed Hermione up the path towards the old monastery.

"How dangerous are the monsters?" Hermione asked once they were out of earshot.

"With any luck, the skeletons or goblin-like creatures will just charge at us and we'll be able to cut them down without any trouble," Myst offered.

"What if we run into trouble?" Hermione asked.

"Then we run like hell and find somewhere less horrible." Myst shivered as they approached the monastery and he felt a shiver of fear crawl down his spine. 'This is worse than walking through a ghost town.'

Hermione summoned her sword. "Hopefully this won't…" she trailed off as a dark skinned man in black robes stumbled out of the monastery and collapsed as three skeletons jumped on his back.

"Run!" the sorcerer shouted.

Myst summoned his sword and charged the skeletons, trying not to think about the fact that the monsters had left the monastery, something they weren't supposed to be able to do with Diablo imprisoned or that he was rushing into danger to save someone that was probably fictional. His first swing was less polished than he'd have liked but at least the sword more than proved its quality and cut through the bone like rotten wood rather than spell hardened bone.

Hermione charged the group, trusting her defensive gear to save her and worried about the man in robes the creatures were trying to kill. She hacked at the skeleton that jumped at her and blinked in surprise when her sword cut through it with barely any resistance, causing a plain looking wooden staff to appear out of thin air when the skeleton was destroyed.

Myst hacked through the head of the third skeleton. "Are you going to live?"

"Probably," the sorcerer muttered as he got to his feat.

"What happened?" Myst asked warily, not taking his eyes off the entrance to the monastery.

"I ran out of mana and charges with my staff and didn't have enough time to recharge the staff," the man replied as he pulled a leather bound book out of his backpack and handed it to Myst. "Here, I've already learned everything I can from it."

Myst unsummoned his sword and opened the book then nearly dropped it as knowledge of several arcane symbols burned themselves into his mind. "What the fuck was that!"

"It takes some getting used to. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to see the healer," the sorcerer grumbled as he headed down the trail towards town.

"Are you okay?" Hermione asked Myst.

Myst rubbed his right temple for a couple of seconds as he waited for his headache to fade. "Just a headache."

"Cursed?" Hermione asked warily as she looked at the book with her glasses. "No, it just instantly teaches the firebolt spell to anyone that opens the covers."

"Pretty much," Myst said as he handed her the book. "I was sort of expecting it to vanish."

"Why would it vanish?" Hermione asked as she examined the outside of the book.

"Because they vanish in the game," Myst admitted as he checked the staff. 'Firebolt staff: 15/15 charges, nice.'

Hermione opened the book and winced as several arcane symbols burned themselves into her mind, making her feel like she'd just drank a slushie too fast. "Yeah, that's unpleasant."

"Just unpleasant?" Myst asked as he walked over and picked up the staff.

"It's a bit uncomfortable, maybe because I have more magic?" Hermione asked thoughtfully.

"Probably," Myst admitted. "I'm going to have to fix that once we get to the point we can grab some magic elixirs, assuming they exist."

"Is there a reason the skeleton dropped a staff it wasn't carrying?" Hermione asked as she put the book in her belt pouch to study later.

"The monastery might be a magical zone that makes the area act like a game or maybe the monsters are just weird. Shall we head in?" Myst asked as he gestured towards the creepy monastery, his greed for magic overcoming in his fear and common sense.

"Let's," Hermione agreed, hoping she wasn't making a mistake.