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At a Crossroads... What Comes Next?

I've finished work for the time being on the new novel! Edits and formatting of the manuscript are complete, all materials needed for querying a publisher are finalized, and the query letter with those materials has been sent out. So, now it's just a waiting game to see if the publisher is interested (a process which can take several months). Which begs the question: What comes next?

The DarkRPG project

The original plan was to resume work on the DarkRPG game project. But after having this time away from that project to work on a novel instead, I find the prospect of resuming that earlier work to fill me with dread. This surprised me. And it forced me to come to the sobering realization that I've been suffering from burn-out for quite some time, without even knowing it.

Sometimes burn-out and depression can be nearly invisible, if the symptoms have emerged slowly enough and persisted long enough. In a way, they can become a new "normal," and may fly entirely beneath the radar. For me, that's what's been happening. I knew I was tired, I knew my enthusiasm for the project wasn't what it should be, but I'd never stopped long enough to poke my head up and gain real perspective on the matter.

However, when I stopped working on the DarkRPG game project and started working on a novel instead, I suddenly felt incredibly better. I suddenly had energy again and enthusiasm. I felt like my old self. And that feeling was not brief, it persisted over the last few months, serving as a stark and sobering contrast with how I'd been feeling beforehand. To the point that I actually found myself remarking, "Holy shit. I think I was really depressed before and just didn't realize it."

More Novels

So, I've been asking myself that same question from further above: What comes next? The businessman in me says: We finish what we start. We said we'd make this game, and we follow through on it. People are expecting it and we shouldn't disappoint them. But if I search my feelings as an artist and creative, rather than simply as a businessman, I find myself inexorably pulled toward the prospect of writing more novels instead. The story I began in this first book has room for a sequel (perhaps a whole trilogy), in fact, the ending on the final pages almost demands it. And right now, the writing of those sequels is where my heart is leading me.

There's a quote I adore by Ray Bradbury, which in a way, has become a guiding beacon for me, "Love what you do, and do what you love." And though I loved much of the time I spent working on Sanctuary in Time, when it was finished, I was burned-out and ready to do something else. At the time, I thought that something else should be a new game project, but now I realize I was wrong. Instead of finding a new love to fuel me, I found my burn-out worsening. And it was only when I tried something totally different--by writing a novel--that I found that love kindled again.

What Comes Next?

Because of this, I'm placing the DarkRPG game project on indefinite hiatus, and turning my focus to writing more novels instead.

I hate delivering this news to you, because I know for many it will be a disappointment. There may be anger and upset, and for all of that, I am truly sorry. But delivering this news is also a huge relief, because what I do, I do at the urging of my heart, and for me, there can be no higher calling.

I'll be continuing to post info and updates here on my creative work, only now with a broader focus that more heavily includes my books. And I hope you stick around for that journey. Your support and encouragement have been truly invaluable to me. I appreciate each and every one of you.

I consider the novel I just finished writing to be something truly special and exciting. I can't wait for everyone to read it. And in the meantime, I'll be hammering out some pulse-pounding sequels to follow it up. So, stay tuned, and remember...

Above all else, have fun.

Max Ingram

At a Crossroads... What Comes Next?

Comments

Thank you, Superfreq. I appreciate the kind words and understanding.

Novus Operandi

I'm glad that you've come to realize what really makes you happy Max. Sure I'm disappointed that Dark RPG won't be a thing, but the last thing I want as a player is to know that the dev making the game I enjoy hates doing it and is only forcing themselves to continue so that they can put food on the table. If you can free your self from that weight holding you down and do something you enjoy instead while also making money from it, I say go for it man! Sadly I don't have the funds to continue supporting, as I impose a limit on subscriptions and donations per month and have to make it count, but I really do wish you the best of luck in your writing. I'll still be checking in now and then to see how things are going for you though...

Superfreq


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