#coronart 13: Faraway

So first... Did I say I would post something cool for the 10$ + patrons today? Well, I meant tomorrow, or... soon. 

Second, I did a little art & meditation experiment before the lockdowns began, but forgot to show it to you. I want to release the video and an accompanying article pretty soon, but struggling to find the mindspace and time for it. Here's the video, please tell me what you think: https://youtu.be/ysmaYAykfo8

So...

#coronart day 13: Faraway. Stay home, make art, support artists, join #coronart

Today's art is for sale for 200$ as part of the @artistsupportpledge #artistsupportpledge as started by @matthewburrowsstudio on Instagram. For every 1000$ I sell for, I will purchase artwork from another artist for 200$.  

Today I'm going to do another kind of shout out, a shout out to... yourself? So, as a lot of people know, I'm struggling with a bi-polar condition and frequent depressions. My latest depressive episode lasted from late September and ended a week or two before the lockdowns started.  If it hadn't ended, life would have been really tough right now, and there I certainly wouldn't have come up with my coronart-challenge. 

The key to getting up from the depression this time was pure resilience, eating better, sleeping better, drawing every day since October, exercising every day since late January(even if ever so slightly some days). And to be honest, I've felt pretty unbeatable as of late. 

Yesterday was the first day in two months where I forgot to exercise. In addition to that I had to do shopping for our family, plus mother-in-law, for the next two weeks or so. And even though I can be an exhibitionist of sorts, I also get extremely exhausted by social interactions. And just walking around in stores for a couple of hours left me a nervous wreck. 

Today I woke up with a hangover, almost as if I'd been drinking. Almost as if the depression was picking up where it left off. And everything started going bad. But, I knew the cure. I just wasn't motivated to do it. I didn't have any hope it would work. 

Finally, sometime after lunch, I managed to hurl myself out in the rain to exercise. It didn't go well at first. Then the wife and the kids came out, and we ran around and played. And I ran. I ran as quickly as I could. And I got exhausted. In the good way. And it was like a cloud of smog lifting from my soul. And afterwards I even got to do a focused exercise routine alone. 

And now... Now I'm very hopeful that I'll wake up tomorrow, feeling good. But it's been a scary reminder of how little it takes to just tip me off the edge. So... This is todays shout out: Take care of yourselves.