Do we have covert couples' privilege?
Added 2022-10-02 10:00:05 +0000 UTCGood morning!
This week I got a request to explore couples' privilege, so let's talk about it. There are layers to it, and it can vary dramatically across social and institutional spaces. Often, we can think we've explicitly discussed it, only to realize a subtle assumption or small benefit still persists for one of our partners.
This isn't a "bad" thing inherently; I don't moralize the existence of most privileges, as a lot of times they're granted and maintained by systems outside of our control. But it's important to notice and acknowledge them, especially if you have a non-hierarchical intention behind interpersonal dynamics.
Chapters:
00:00 Intro
01:02 Institutional couples privileges
03:15 Structural and/or interdependent privileges
04:34 Social traditions / assumptions
06:32 Social biases, especially family and friends
09:39 Personal traditions / assumptions
10:47 What if you have hierarchy though?
Automated transcript PDF (attached at the very bottom of this post) via Otter AI
Automated captions provided by Vimeo
Warmly,
Morgan
Comments
Hi! I see it working and playing on my end. Are you on the Patreon app? I keep the vimeo embeds exclusive to the Patreon platform so they stay private
Morgan
2023-04-06 11:05:31 +0000 UTCOh no! This Vimeo link is broken now, did something go wrong?
Corinne
2023-04-06 02:45:22 +0000 UTCcan be discussed. We dont have to force +2 / +3s if theres a tight budget. but a convo about it is different than imposing a +1 default I think.
Morgan
2022-10-03 16:42:46 +0000 UTCI have so much appreciation for your perspective in these videos. You're knowledgeable, eloquent, and it's also apparent how emotionally invested you are in these topics, like when you talked about your friend whose parents refused to come to her ceremonial wedding. Just wow. Thank you for sharing that vulnerable moment with us. I have so much respect for what you do. To pose a question on a bit of a lighter note, what would the equivalent of a "plus one" on wedding invitations look like in an evolved world that's more open and accepting of polyamory? Is it a fill in the blank of how many partners you'll be bringing? From the hosts' perspective, I can understand they'd want to have a good handle on what the max number of guests could be, so putting a cap on it wouldn't be unreasonable imo. I'm not planning any weddings in the near future but the question popped into my head as I was watching this video, and I was genuinely curious what that would look like in your opinion :)
Melissa Topp
2022-10-03 03:51:09 +0000 UTC
