"Respite" - A Short Snippet
Added 2021-12-16 00:39:31 +0000 UTCBased on the commission, "Pls need Riley closet time. <3"
The supply closet is quiet. Shielded from the noise of the hospital – the chatter of staff, the beeping of machines, the shrill ring of bedside alarms…You lean your head against a shelf, the cool plastic of the bins a small blessing. Your forehead is damp with sweat, your arms ache from the strain of chest compressions.
You stare at the bins in front of you, trying to focus on the tags listing the items in each bin. If you close your eyes, you’ll just think about your patient’s face. Empty eyes. Slack mouth.
Death is something you don’t think you’ll ever get used to.
You hear the door open, and you turn your head to see Riley, characteristic scowl on his face. But, when he sees you—your hair a mess, your clothes rumpled—he relents…well, as much as he can.
“Make this quick,” Riley says, his arms crossed. “I have a case in ten.”
You don’t say a word. You don’t need to. Instead, you close the distance between the two of you and drop your head against his shoulder. He doesn’t hold you, he doesn’t even move—the two of you just stay there, you leaning on him, him silent beside you.
You are not a person of excess. You’re certainly not a person of sentimentality. And, this is why you always come to Riley in moments like this—moments when you’re tired, you’re exhausted, when you think there is really nothing left in you to give. You don’t need comforting words or someone stroking your hair, someone intruding on you and your space and your grief.
What you need is a witness.
What you need is a warm body.
You suppose, in a way, this makes you and Riley friends. After all, he is one of the few people who’ve seen you vulnerable, and you’re one of the few who’s seen him. You text each other, and you show up for each other. You lean against each other, and listen to each other breathe in the silence.
After a few minutes, you suck in a deep breath and take a step back.
“Thanks,” you say.
Riley’s eyes meet yours, and he inclines his head—barely a nod.
And then he’s gone.
