*New Story* Girls and Bridle - Chapter 5 (part 1) - Together
Added 2020-12-12 01:38:54 +0000 UTCHappy Friday!
Here is the first part of the 5th chapter of Girls and Bridle. I really wished that I didn't have to split this chapter in half, but 16000 words was just too much with all the other work I have to prepare. I didn't want to make a bad quality document.
That said, I'm very happy with this one. I feel my writing is slowly getting better and my English vocabulary is improving. Girls and Bridle is definitely a story I love reading for myself.
So, about the story. This one is more about Hemlock than any other character. She is a deeper character than the previous chapters showed. In this chapter, she is trying to fix the big mistake she made in chapter 4. (removing Nightshade's suit and harness without permission).
Enjoy! :)
TS
Comments
Thanks. I do see the difference myself when I write. Even though I wrote G&B a while ago, I improved it through editing using my previous experiences. It's more a feeling than knowledge, means I still don't plan anything. I write as I go, and when I correct, I fix stuff that seems wrong to me. This one is also special because I like rereading it a lot. All the characters are very unique and there is an actual goal to the story. It's coming to an end soon and it will remain one of my favorite, if not my favorite.
2020-12-14 11:50:48 +0000 UTCI'm glad you picked on that. The ponies had their needs taken care of since a young age so they never had to learn some basic things such as money, where does food comes from, dressing up. You'll see that even more in the second half of the chapter. It's an aspect of them that only came to me in chapter 5. ;)
2020-12-14 11:43:26 +0000 UTCBy the way, now that the year is almost up it’s worth reflecting on your growth as a writer. In a way Building reality and the winter maid series, and even the sun I can’t see are relatively “standard “ in terms of how they depict a particular dentist. But over time you see how you add more and more of a writer “flavor” to these. To me this series is in a way the pinnacle of that, a true sports tale where the sex and latex are a means to further the story rather than story being a means to further sex. (Same can be said about fox and spice or animal cafe or even the latest feliformia, actual novellas of a different genre where kinky sexy times add flavor and context)
Leon
2020-12-14 07:21:14 +0000 UTCPoor Hemlock, working so hard to fix something and yet so naive
Leon
2020-12-14 07:11:34 +0000 UTCIt's definitely one of my favorite set of characters. I wish this series would be as popular as my other ones. ah well... ;)
2020-12-13 17:27:06 +0000 UTCInteresting developments :) They're all humans with positive and negative sides and you can just see them grow in the story, I love that! :)
Sjoerd
2020-12-13 11:08:19 +0000 UTC
