“Kurt, take the crystal. Keep the cyborgs on patrol and kill any tendrils of the Deep One that dare to show their faces. See if you can get the hang of making them use flamers as well...
2025-09-19 19:37:37 +0000 UTC View PostCan you see it yet? Tezca demanded. Considering he was a ghostly jaguar being subsumed by my soul, the guy was a pretty harsh taskmaster.
“No, I can’t bloody see it!”
... 2025-09-19 19:28:26 +0000 UTC View PostThis was not acceptable. I was tired, a little hungry, and now some shapeshifting nightmare from the depths of the Unterwelt had added me to its menu. I put people on the menu; it didn...
2025-09-18 20:33:09 +0000 UTC View Post“I take it you two are already acquainted?” asked the figure from the throne designed for human growth hormone addicts. It looked a bit like the end of Conan, with him sitting on his thro...
2025-09-17 20:21:42 +0000 UTC View PostDammit. Now I had pixie paste all over one hand, a partially paralysed elf, and a dozen unconscious humans to protect. I shifted back into my real body and stomped over to the dwarf who...
2025-09-16 19:57:27 +0000 UTC View PostI shapeshifted into my human form and stepped out of the now oversized loop of enchanted chain.
Yes, I am not the brightest bulb, but seeing as it was my own greed and regret that came up wit...
2025-09-15 20:04:13 +0000 UTC View Post“You summoned us, lord?” Panash said as the Beatuties were led into a command tent. “I must say the new guards are a little much. Don’t you think? Twenty nomads and a dozen gian...
2025-09-15 19:57:42 +0000 UTC View Post“Whatthefu–” I began. I didn’t have a speech prepared for this situation, but I was willing to swear extemporaneously.
“Be silent and do not move!” barked the high-pit...
2025-09-12 19:40:05 +0000 UTC View PostI pulled my aura in tight and blended into the shadows. I slipped through the outer palisade and moved quietly through the yurts. They were even more haphazardly arranged than my own tr...
2025-09-12 19:34:24 +0000 UTC View PostThe Garglewood was vast and unpleasant. It wasn’t a sunlit forest, with birds and small fluffy things gambolling through the boughs. No Bambi mourned his mum, nor did Mr. Bluebird poo...
2025-09-11 20:20:48 +0000 UTC View PostThe temperature dropped rapidly as night fell. Without any clouds to retain the warmth, the crystal-clear sky sucked the heat away. The fires were lit and roaring, rich smells of roasting mea...
2025-09-10 20:33:02 +0000 UTC View Post“Johnson?” I yelled, getting back to my feet and plucking the bolt from my shoulder. “Fronge, Edible-Reg was a dick. He deserved to get eaten. Don’t shoot me again, or you’re ...
2025-09-10 20:25:15 +0000 UTC View PostLuckdire was already waiting for me in the barroom of the Long Horn when I got downstairs the next day. I was in a foul mood, despite the ‘success’ of the plot.
“Ah, Bob!&nb...
2025-09-09 19:01:16 +0000 UTC View Post“Do you see how the lips are the most desiccated. They ought to be the least; all the fluid in the body had to pass through them as part of the rapid dehydration. So in theory, they s...
2025-09-08 20:02:20 +0000 UTC View PostI opened my eyes back in the real world and leapt to my feet. I swept Fay into a hug and held her tight.
“Missed you,” I whispered into her ear, earning a kiss on the neck in reply....
2025-09-08 19:56:07 +0000 UTC View Post“How did you think I was going to frame Hateskale?” Agatha asked as she took my arm and led me toward the group containing both our host and her victim.
“I don’t know. Leave a c...
2025-09-05 18:17:08 +0000 UTC View PostOne of the Six has fallen! Raymond Cobbler has killed Marwan Amir! The third Exile has fallen!
Raymond will have access to a curated selectio...
2025-09-05 18:11:34 +0000 UTC View PostIn the end, I shook his hand. Yet another contract was signed, and the list of my obligations increased. As profitable as coming to the city was, I was going to be sending minions in th...
2025-09-04 20:19:53 +0000 UTC View PostThe squads that had come out to herd the surviving cat-monsters back into captivity were much more cautious as they approached me. I was struggling to get my left leg into my trousers, balanc...
2025-09-03 19:44:26 +0000 UTC View PostMy sword appeared from storage in my right hand, and my left pulled the dagger from my belt. I rushed forward, slicing at anything that got close or impeded my path. One more kill, and ...
2025-09-03 19:37:35 +0000 UTC View PostI soared over the heads of the crowd, passed gracefully over the barriers around the arena, and landed with a splash of sand between Brigitte and Kelly Krimsonscale. I did not do a superhero ...
2025-09-02 18:49:15 +0000 UTC View PostIt had been expensive. But the lust monkey in my mind had won out over the greed-demon in the end. Messily. What Esme wanted with such an outfit… Well, I knew what she wanted.&n...
2025-09-01 19:41:26 +0000 UTC View PostGlimpse trailed the Scholar’s ship for a day before turning back to rejoin us as we sailed and rowed towards my destination. The next three days passed peacefully, and I found myself saying...
2025-09-01 19:35:28 +0000 UTC View PostChapter 2 narrated by the author of my existence! Hope you enjoy! I'll crack the whip and get the old man making more!
Thanks very much for your support!
Chris
2025-08-31 08:36:00 +0000 UTC View Post“Baronet Bob the dragon, to see Baron Pratnip, if he has a moment.”
This footman looked considerably posher than Von Kolben’s had been. A tidy blue uniform lined with gold frogwor...
2025-08-29 20:02:18 +0000 UTC View Post“How many want to come aboard?” yelled Prender.
“Where’s your captain, boy? No disrespect to you, but we come in peace. It’s only polite for an officer to be met by an officer...
2025-08-29 19:56:27 +0000 UTC View PostVon Kolben lived in a modest manor house at the edge of the ‘rich-bastards’ part of town. The city guards were out in force in this area, patrolling in groups of two or three on every str...
2025-08-28 18:37:12 +0000 UTC View PostMy eyes snapped open in Jasper’s cabin, and my aura flashed out around me. Someone cried out, and as I sat up, I saw Prended ducking behind the central table as lines of blood dripped down ...
2025-08-27 20:05:45 +0000 UTC View PostI turned like I was wearing a neck brace, or like Batman before he got a helmet upgrade. Defiant Belligerence settled onto the barstool next to me and waved a finger at Beville, who had retre...
2025-08-27 19:51:35 +0000 UTC View Post“As a civilised being, I’m willing to give you a whole ten seconds to explain what just happened,” I growled. He smelled tasty, though, and it was taking a legendary feat of self-contro...
2025-08-26 20:27:01 +0000 UTC View Post