(DHF)Chapter 43: Cursed gaze

For starters my fear that I would stop being human came true as my race now read as cursed-human. I didn't feel any different despite this which was great as I still felt joy and all the other normal emotions just fine. I also didn't have any weirdly evil or depraved impulses so you know , yay. My new skill was a huge bummer though, [Vessel of Sin] was was clearly a twisted skill born from my cursed energy and fears that honestly put a huge limiter on me. That line about it being a burden was not a joke.-

I constantly felt like I was moving underwater, like my body was being pressed in on from all sides. I wasn't physically limited per se as I still could move as fast as normal and could hit as hard as usual but felt like I wasn't if that made sense. My additional granted skill [Soul gaze] also sucked ass as I was practically blind. Fun fact the skill was CONSTANTLY active and another fun fact, souls were bright as shit. Like staring at the fucking sun bright. I tried to get used to it really I did but man did Bell and Hestia not make it easy.-

As a goddess Hestia's soul was MASSIVE and pure golden with silver streaks which was beautiful but a pain to get beamed with constantly. Bells soul was white, like pure fucking white which tracked considering how innocent he was. Let me tell you after I woke up from my admittedly self induced coma seeing both of those immediately was a highly unpleasant experience. Honestly the only "good" news besides me getting one step closer to godhood was that I could make cursed tools now.-

As it turned out I did in fact need the blacksmith or in my case Curse-smith developmental skill to create cursed tools. Not to say I don't absolutely suck ass at it because while I CAN make cursed tools I clearly have no idea what I am doing in the process and it shows. My first attempt went feral and had to be put down, may it rest in pieces. You are probably all like "Hey aren't you sort of skipping all the reactions from Hestia and Bell and stuff?" and the answer is yes, yes i am. I got yelled at, like a lot, it wasn't a fun time for me.

Even more unfun for me was that my tattoos got bigger, again. This time I got some new marks on my face and arms which was just great for my self esteem let me tell you. On my face I got two black dots on my forehead that I was pretty sure represented horns. On my arms I got four new tattoos, a pair of matching black bands on my wrists and two hollow black triangles on the back of my palms. I mean the new tattoos didn't look bad at all but I wasn't a huge fan of them personally.

Lets see what else was worth mentioning? Ah! Well I lost like two weeks of time recovering from my level up as my vessel rebuilt itself. That was a bit annoying but at the end of it I had somewhat gotten used to my new senses and power. I found out my soul was black by the way which was frankly confusing to learn since at first I thought I didn't even have one since I didn't see anything. It was only after REALLY paying attention that I realized that I couldn't see anything because it was too gods damned dark.-

Not sinful though as I discovered after comparing my soul with those of other peoples in public. Sin interestingly enough came in a hue of colors according to my new skill which I had to carefully figure out. For greed it was a yellow, lust was purple, wrath was red, sloth was a pale gray and pride was brown. Envy and gluttony surprisingly enough weren't actually a sin according to my skill or perhaps they fell under one of the other sins somehow.-

As I learnt most souls were comprised of a single over arching color and then "stained" with the color of their sins. Some souls like Bells or I suppose my own in a way were brighter than others which meant something I'm sure but what was beyond me for the moment. I had a sort of instinctual judgement of how much staining was needed for a soul to be counted as innocent or sinful which I attributed to my new skill. Roughly speaking more than half a soul being stained was the dividing line for it to be "sinful" which was a high bar to cross it seemed as not even some of the people moving shadily out of Daedalus street were that stained, usually.-

My next meeting with Syr was complicated to say the least as it went like this.

Our gazes met and we both froze when it became clear that we were both staring at the others soul. Her soul was massive and a rich mix of purple, silver and red with sins the same color staining it ever so slightly.

"You're a god?" "You can see souls?" we both asked at the same time awkwardly.

I went to speak again but she hurriedly stopped me. "Not here! Follow me." she hissed looking around nervously to make sure nobody heard us.

Syr leading me into the hostess had Mama Mia looking confused for a moment from behind the bar before getting serious when Syr gave her a look. I got led to an empty room above the main area of the hostess.

"Why the act?" I couldn't help asking when she shut the door.

I was frankly astonished to find that the friendly and kind Syr that I had come to know was in fact a goddess and one with some rather questionable sins. 

She sighed "I am looking for something and I believe being myself would make it difficult to find it. You need to understand that being who I am means I have many enemies and few allies. if I ever found what I seek they may move to take it from me. I mean no harm playing mortal I swear." she said sincerely.

"If you are wondering about this whole soul sight thing I got it after I leveled up, it's been an unpleasant couple weeks." I said honestly.

"I can imagine, i myself sometimes wish I couldn't see them as it can be a heavy burden to bear. Could you please try and keep my being a goddess a secret, I would take it as a personal favor if you did?" she said practically begging.

"You seem to be awfully attached to this role of yours so I suppose I can act as though i haven't seen what I have. But I demand that you don't make fun of my tattoos in exchange." I said with a smile and she giggled.

"It's a steep price but I think I can live with it." she said and we shook on it.