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thehardtimes

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Hard Digest August 14: Early Access Gentrification, Pits, Eulogies, and More

Second-Wave Gentrification Threatens To Price Out All of City’s Historic Microbreweries

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Hard Digest August 13: Gold Medals, Early Access Squatting, Friendships, The Eagles, and More

Olympian Excited to Return Home With Gold Medal and Pawn It For Rent Money

By 2024-08-14 00:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest 12: Early Access Velvet Underground Shirts, Nostalgia, Dog Parks, and More

Guy Fleeing From Pack of Escaped Gorillas Regrets Wearing Velvet Underground Shirt to Zoo Today

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Hard Digest August 11: Early Access Kamala Harris, Stephen King, Band Chemistry, and More

Kamala Harris Leans Into Cool Aunt Image by Promising Junior Staffers Can Drink Beers in White House Basement

2024-08-12 00:00:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 10: Early Access Drum Circles, Brat Girl Summer, Trump, Polly Pocket, and More

Feuding Drum Circles Put Differences Aside to Form One Big Unemployment Line

By 2024-08-11 00:00:08 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 9: Early Access The Decline of Western Civilization, Rare Cheeses, Recycling, Intermittent Fasting, and More

4th Installment of “Decline of Western Civilization” to Focus on Depressing World of Punks Becoming Conservative Nutjobs

2024-08-10 00:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 8: Early Access Rotten.com, Joe Biden, Rob Thomas, and More

Harvard Study Concludes that 100% of Millennials Have Rotten.com-Related PTSD

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MVP: White Zombie "More Human Than Human"

This week we travel back to when Rob Zombie started his film-directing career by breaking down White Zombie's "More Human Than Human." So put a giant pumpkin on your head, find your robot friend an...

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Hard Digest August 7: Trump, Early Access Bullies, Travis Kelce, Juggalo Moms, and More

Trump Regales Conservative Media Outlets With Charming Anecdote About Time He Got Five Innocent Men Arrested In Central Park

2024-08-08 00:00:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 6: RFK JR., Early Access Henry Rollins, Rock Bottom, Stadium Organists, and More

RFK Jr. Reminds Voters He Also Keeps a Monkey With a Handgun on His Nightstand For Self Defense If They Wanna Hear About That

2024-08-07 00:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 5: Early Access Mugshots, New Genres, Statues, and More

Metalhead Asks if He Can Change Into Morbid Angel Shirt Before Taking Mugshot

BY 2024-08-06 00:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 4: Early Access Phones, Lit, The Rolling Stones, and More

STUDY: Fuck It, Scrolling on Your Phone Before Bed Actually Good For You

BY 2024-08-05 00:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 3: Early Access Taylor Swift, Prisons, Fascism, The Blair Witch Project, and More

Taylor Swift Releases Album to Overshadow Friend’s Engagement Announcement

BY 2024-08-04 00:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 2: Early Access Buckcherry, Metallica, Garbage Blooms, Trauma, and More

Buckcherry Wonders If They Suck Too Much or Not Enough for Ironic Nostalgia

BY 2024-08-03 00:00:07 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest August 1: JD Vance, Early Access Chino Moreno, No Doubt. JoAnn Fabrics, and More

JD Vance Further Angers Nation By Claiming “Childless Tarantula Guys” Are Pretty Cool Though

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MVP: Dinosaur Jr. "Feel the Pain

This week on "MVP Bill and Dan head back to the year 1994 to talk about Dinosaur Jr's "Feel the Pain" and learn a lot about golf along the way.

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Hard Digest July 31: Boycotts, Simone Biles, AI Taco Bell, Early Access HitClips, Broken Arms, Weezer, and More

Officials Confirm Olympic Games “May Never Recover” From Rob Schneider Boycott

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Hard Digest July 30: JD Vance, Early Access Nu Metal, Mitochondria, Vintage Shirts, and More

JD Vance Catching More Backlash After Saying Women Over 30 Shouldn’t Be Happy

BY 2024-07-31 00:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 29: Olympic Skateboarding, Venezuela, Early Access Wedding DJ, Enzyte, Bedbugs, and More

Olympic Skateboarding Competition Interrupted by Irate Woman Who Says the Noise Is Scaring Her Dog

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Hard Digest July 28: Early Access Metalheads, Instagram, Classic Rock, and More

Metalhead Wakes from Horrible Nightmare Where Vest Had Sleeves

BY 2024-07-29 00:00:06 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 27: Early Access Chappell Roan, Mental Health, Rural Vegans, Saying No, and More

Nice! Woman Who Called You Homophobic Slurs in High School So Excited to See Chappell Roan

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Hard Digest July 26: Early Access Knockd Loose, Wilco, Cybertrucks, Adult Friendships, and More

ASPCA Adoptions Up 600% After Replacing Sarah McLachlan Song with Knocked Loose Screaming “ARF ARF” on Loop

2024-07-27 00:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 25: Early Access Harsh Noise, North Korea, Five Finger Death Punch, and More

Harsh Noise Show Audience Unaware Fire Alarm Has Been Going off Past 45 Minutes

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MVP: Civ "Can't Wait One Minute More"

Today on the podcast Bill and Dan go deep into the Youtube archives and dig out a certified gem of a music video from Civ. If you don't like this music video you can suck an egg, we loved it, liste...

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Hard Digest July 24: Early Access Grateful Dead, Punctuality, Budweiser Frogs, and More

Only Two Punctual People in Friend Group Sick of Hanging Out With One Another

BY 2024-07-25 00:00:07 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 23: Early Access Funerals, Quiznos, Cornholio, and More

Goth’s Funeral Attendees Unsure of Which Hearse to Follow

BY 2024-07-24 00:00:05 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 22: Clarence Thomas, Early Access Dave Matthews Band, Dancing, Nature Valley, and More

Giggling Clarence Thomas Spends Entire Night Chatting on Phone With Donald Trump About Ways to Block Kamala Harris Nomination

2024-07-23 00:00:04 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 21: BIDEN DROPS OUT, Early Access Rob Halford, License to Ill, Favorite Bands, and More

Biden Cancels Campaign Citing Low Ticket Sales

BY 2024-07-22 00:00:10 +0000 UTC View Post

Hard Digest July 20th: Early Access Ted Nugent, Machine Gun Kelly, Joe Biden, and Morbid Angel

Ted Nugent Develops Gas-Powered Guitar As A Fuck You To Climate Activist Hippies

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Hard Digest July 19: Kid Rock, Early Access Project 2025, Discovery Zone, Metal, Nostradamus, and More

Global Internet Self-Destructs After Having to Livestream Kid Rock RNC Performance

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